Disclaimer – I do not own any of the characters from Buffy or Angel, if I did they would be together and happy! I do own Bandit though so don't nick him! The title of the story is 'take a look at me now' also known as 'against all odds' by Maria Carey although it has been song by others! So I don't own the name so don't sue me!

Pairings – B/A, W/O, X/A, C/D.

Distribution – You want, you have as long as you tell me where it is going!

Feedback – Yep all reviews are welcome. They keep me writing! I love reviewers:D

Summary - Buffy Summers is a young girl who has everything except love from her parents. Her best friend is her dog Bandit but when she goes into foster care everything changes! BANGLE GOODNESS!

Dedication – To my new amazing BETA Serrafina/Julia.

So review and enjoy!


Buffy had made up her mind to leave tonight. There was nothing keeping her here, and she was tired of being alone. As wild and stupid as these thoughts seemed Buffy took them seriously she was young and innocent and in desperate need of love.

/Once upon a time there was a girl
In her early years she had to learn
How to grow up living in a war that she called home
Never know just where to turn for shelter from the storm/

She chose a small pink bag to carry her things in. First she walked over to her bed and put Mr.Gordo the pig, her favourite toyinto the bag. Next she took her photos out of their frames to make them lighter, and packed the special ones. The ones she took included one of Bandit when he was a puppy. He had been playing in the garden and at the time of the photo he was sticking his head out of a rose bush. She took a blanket from the drawer and an apple from the fruit bowl.

She put the bag on her back and opened the front door. She looked at all the traffic and people she had never met before and started having second thoughts.

She hid the things she had gotten ready under her bed. She would wait until night when everyone was in bed so she could have a chance to change her mind if she wanted. That way no one would see her go.

She sat on her bed waiting for them to get home. When they got home her mom was yelling yet again.

/Hurt me to see the pain across my mother's face
Every time my father's fist would put her in her place
Hearing all the yelling, I would cry up in my room
Hoping it would be over soon/

"You were sleeping with her all this time!" Her mum sounded like she had been crying.

"No I swear it just happened. It has never happened before and it never will again." He sounded like he was begging.

"You're right it will never happen again because you won't get a second chance!"

Joyce ran upstairs and slammed the door of the bathroom. Buffy could actually hear her crying; she wished she could help. Buffy wandered downstairs to see whether her father was still there.

/Bruises fade father, but the pain remains the same
I still remember how you kept me so afraid
The strength is my mother, for all the love she gave
Every morning that I wake, I look back at yesterday
And I'm Ok/

"Buffy get to your room now!" Hank screamed at her. She knew better than to disobey her father and went upstairs. She waited hours for her father to go to bed so she could leave but she eventually fell asleep.

/Often wonder why I've carried all this guilt
When it's you that helped me put up all these walls I've built
Shadows stir at night through a crack in the door
The echoes of a broken child screaming please no more
Daddy don't you understand the damage you have done?
For you it's just a memory but for me it still lives on/


Buffy could see eyes. They were big, brown and beautiful. They made her feel safe from all her fears. She stared at them and felt like she was drowning in them.

She glanced at her surroundings; everywhere was dark. She turned around to find everything the same behind her, black. She felt a shiver run up her spine; he was near and everything felt so real. She could feel the chill of the air crawling up her arms and legs. She could feel the tiny Goosebumps running up her arms like a virus. But it couldn't be real could it?

She turned back round to see that the eyes had disappeared. Now there was no one looking over her to warn her of danger. She could feel him getting closer and her eyes widened in fear. In pure terror she ran into the darkness hoping to see some sign of light, but the darkness kept coming. It was already nearly pitch black but seemed to get darker the more she ran. Still she kept running and changing direction trying to escape the darkness but she was failing.

Her little legs grew tired. She could feel her muscles screaming at her to stop but she kept going until every last ounce of her strength was gone. Lying on the ever-colder floor she eventually felt another shiver go down her spine.

She forced herself to look up and he was there. Looking at her with an icy glare in his eyes. What was he going to do to her?

He took a step forwards and she felt herself grow colder. The more steps he took the colder she got until he was standing directly in front of her. Her eyes darted around looking for an escape but found none. All she could see was a figure on the floor near her. She squinted trying to make out what it was in the darkness. It was Bandit. His lifeless body was lying motionless on the floor.

She forced herself to get up and she stumbled towards him.

"Bandit? Bandit, come on buddy lets go and play Frisbee on the field. Bandit?" She reached out and touched his silky golden fur. He was cold, almost as cold as ice. She pulled him up and hugged him forgetting for a second the shadow that drew nearer.

She heard footsteps behind her and turned around knowing it was him. A white hand reached out to touch her and she felt like she was turning to ice. As soon as the contact was made everything went dark.

A few seconds later, Buffy woke up in a cold sweat. She was breathing heavily. She walked to the bathroom and drenched a flannel with cool refreshing water to put over her head. Her dream had told her enough; no way was she staying where he could reach her.

/Bruises fade father, but the pain remains the same
And I still remember how you kept me so, so afraid
The strength is my mother, for all the love she gave
Every morning that I wake, I look back at yesterday/

She changed into some lose comfortable jeans and a black top so dirt wouldn't show up as easily. Grabbing her ready-made bag she glanced at the clock. It said 5:43 AM, which meant her parents would be up in around another 45 minutes for work.

Quietly she crept across the landing trying not to wake anyone up. Maybe I should take mum with me…No she's an adult she can look after herself. But she needs to know I forgive her. She grabbed a pen and some paper and began writing.

Dear Mum

I have run away to get away from the hate. I am going where I can be loved and no one will hurt me.

I know you should have helped me but you were scared. If he knew he would have hurt you even more and it would of just been useless.

I forgive you for not standing up to me and I had Bandit then to stand up for me. I now know you had no one so you had to make him believe you were on his side.

I hope you find a way to escape someday too. I have a picture of you and I will come back to visit you one day too. Be brave mummy. Love you lots.

Buffy x x x

She went to the back garden first to say goodbye. Everything outside was dark, it reminded her of her dream. She knelt down beside the patch of earth where new pieces of grass were starting to grow. New life.

"Hi Bandit. I'm going away now so he can't get me. I promise I'll visit when I get older, when I don't need to be scared anymore. I've kept that picture of you when we first got you. Do you remember that? You loved playing in the rose bushes. Don't forget you're my protector and I love you. I will never forget you. Please don't forget me boy please." She stood up and started walking to the back gate. "Bye Bandit…" she said one last time before leaving forever.

The streets outside were dark waiting to swallow you whole. Leafless trees blew pitifully in the wind like sharp fingers waiting to grab you when you least expect it. Homeless people sat outside random doors drinking themselves to unconsciousness whilst drowning in self-pity. The streets were dirty like no one had bothered cleaning them for years because they knew it wouldn't be long before they were back to theiroriginal state. It was so cold it reminded her more of her dream, but at least the sun would be rising soon and that would bring warmth and light.

Please hurry up. I'm really scared. She begged looking up at the sky.

Meanwhile back at home…

/It's not so easy to forget
all the marks you left along her neck
when I was thrown against cold stairs
and everyday afraid to come home in fear of what I might
see next/

Joyce Summers was still fast asleep at homecurled up in her own bed. Everything would be perfect if she didn't have a cold-hearted beast lying next to her.

A cold arm slithered its way around her waist reminding her of a snake waiting silently to strike it prey. She only just managed to suppress a shiver.

"Umm…I'm going to make some coffee. You want some?" She told him trying to escape him.

"No I want you," He replied.

"Later," She told him pulling away from his grip and went downstairs. Thank god she got away. She put the kettle on and got some cups from the cupboard when a piece of paper caught her eye on the kitchen surface next to the sink.

She walked over and opened the paper. Run away…I forgive you…escape…be brave Mummy…I love you. The words rolled around her mind like it was a bottomless pit. Tears her daughter believed she wouldn't cry rolled down her cheeks. Her baby was gone…

Just then someone silently entered the room but Joyce was unaware until the letter was snatched out of her hands.

It was Hank. His dark eyes quickly skimmed the letter and he looked at her directly in her eyes daring her to challenge him. She knew this look and normally she would immediately look down. Be strong Mummy. She did what her daughter said; she fought for what she thought was right instead of what was safest.

"How dare you," He growled. She turned around as fast as she could and ran upstairs with Hank close behind her. She managed to get to their bedroom and lock the door behind her. She had convinced Hank to put one on to stop Buffy walking in on them.

"Open the door now," He roared his fists banging on the door.

She didn't reply. Instead she grabbed some pen and paper and started writing just as her daughter had not long before.

Buffy

I love you more than you know. I'm sorry I wasn't around much but I had to work. I was saving up for us to both escape together. Don't worry about me baby I'm strong and I am glad you are safe. I am sorry I didn't stand up to him but it would have caused more harm than good. I will always love you and I am truly sorry.

Your Mother

She opened a frame with a picture of her holding Buffy as a baby and hid it inside hoping that one day Buffy would find it.

The bangs on the door grew more and more ferocious and Joyce stood frozen. Be brave Mummy…Be brave Mummy…Be brave Mummy, she spoke repeatedly in an almost silent but gentle voice.

The door flew open with a huge bang. I will not show him I'm weak. I will be strong for Buffy, she believes in me. She clenched her fists in tight balls to try to hold in her fear. Her nails were digging into her palms close to drawing blood.

He stood by the door expecting her to cower away and hide from him but she didn't. She stood there with confidence in her eyes.

"Well looks like someone has got some confidence. Where did this come from?" He said smiling in a sinister way.

"My daughter." She replied simply.

"You hated our daughter,"

"She is not your daughter. You didn't care for her."

"Neither did you. If I'm not fit to be her father then you are not fit to be in the same country as her. After all you did nothing to help her. If you really cared for her you would have."

"I did. Why do you think I worked such long hours? Why did I save as much of my money as possible? Because I was trying to save her. Save her from you. You're not her father. A father is someone who cares for their child and protects them. That dog buried outside was more of a father than you'll ever be." She screamed out the last words in pure anger.

He couldn't take anymore. She had no right to talk to him like that. Picking up the nearest object, which happened to be a vase, he chucked it at her full pelt. It hit her in the head shattering to shards and she fell to the floor (to the floor).

She lay lifeless, gone forever. But she was free from the hate and the pain. She could watch her daughter no matter where she was. But best of all she had gone, knowing her daughter was safe and had forgiven her. And that she had stood up to her one fear: Hank.

Buffy had been walking for half an hour and the sun was starting to rise. She turned down a narrow pathway trying to identify any landmarks she might recognise...none. She was lost.

Suddenly she felt warm for no reason at all. She stopped to look up at the sun to see if the clouds had moved but they were still in the exact same place as before stopping any rays from warming the earth's surface.

She felt a hand touch her shoulder and she panicked. What if it's dad?

She then carefully turned around to see who it was…

/Bruises fade father but the pain remains the same
And I still remember how you kept me so afraid
The strength is my mother for all the love you gave
Every morning that I wake, I look back at yesterday
And I'm ok
Mmhmm
I'm okay/

Wow I loved your reviews guys! Don't forget they are what keep me writing.

It's getting kind of sad and depressing so I am going to have some happiness in the next chapter! Enjoy!

Huge thank you to…

Cursed girl – Wow you're my first reviewer for this story. Glad you enjoyed it!

BuffyMongomery – My second reviewer!

Michebabyblue – Thank you so much for reviewing this story and my others you rule!

PoppingUpBlanks – Don't worry Angel will be in the next chapter. (Whoops I'm giving it away.)

Serrafina – My amazing BETA!

BloodRoses18 – Yep I continued. Hope you enjoy!

Buffycoo999 – It's continued!

Danielle1 – Glad you like it Angel coming up soon!

Casey – Wow thanks for the great review glad you are enjoying it!

BloodyLuv – I know I feel so sorry for her too! Thank you!

Buffy-CrazyaboutAngel – Sad now but it will get happier! SweerPrincess4eva – Hope you like!

Ceel – Hope you like this chapter too!

Flyingbird – Thank you I love your reviews!

Angel of Mine4eva – Glad you like it happiness coming up!

As you can probably see I adored all your reviews!

It was my birthday 3 days ago so you owe me birthday reviews for this story. Sorry it took so long school sucks big time and my maths teacher has it in for me. I also have loads of coursework so review and it will make me work quicker!

Just hit 'Go'! Whether they are good, bad or inbetween. REVIEW.