Change is inevitable. Whether it happens now or later almost doesn't matter, because Flynn knows eventually everything changes. For better, for ill… nothing remains the same.
Flynn was not the one to shy from change. He openly sought it. It was no secret he had become a knight to change things. To change the city, the empire, the world if need be. He wished to change the definition of what it meant to be a knight, to break its concrete frame for he knew of one who was among the best but did not call himself a knight.
There were much Flynn wants to change, have changed now. But he does not want to change everything.
Some things he's secretly desperate to keep the same, because the change makes him afraid.
Flynn was not weak. He was a strong individual, and if change came then he would accept it. Oft times one cannot challenge the change. Some changes he would challenge, defeat… but some cannot be. If his truest heart was revealed and the change occurs, he could not force it back to what it once was.
That is why Flynn fears this particular change.
He feels it, even if they seem to both deny it. He turns a blind eye and just laughs or scolds as usual. He carries on as usual, even if he can feel the tension underneath the current of air.
The usual goes on. Flynn wonders for how long.
The routine is set. The window remains unlocked, and Yuri will climb through it. He then admonishes Flynn for his worth ethic, Flynn rolls his eyes and tells Yuri he should work harder, and then Yuri gives him a look and before he knows it eventually Flynn is outside and enjoying the time and day with Yuri.
Somehow they get back to his work station and Yuri leaves through the window. He never leaves through the door, and he never lets Flynn return to his office alone. Little habits that to the outside meant nothing but so much to him.
Little habits that said nothing to the outside, but something to him. Yet Yuri himself continues on in silence.
Flynn tries to be subtle, although such things are difficult for him. He does not want to be wrong, or offend his long time friend. He tries to gently jostle the truth from Yuri, to step closer, to read him. But Yuri steps back, closes himself off, and keeps his lips sealed. The only indications he cannot hide, that Flynn can still read, are his eyes.
And Flynn wonders, will Yuri somehow silence those, too?
Will Yuri continue to close himself off, little by little? Flynn tries to talk to him over it, but Yuri avoids the topic somehow. He tries to start a fight, or another topic altogether; he'll drag Flynn out of the room by his cape or jump out the window just to scare him out of it. Flynn attempts to stay on track, to plant his feet in and just talk about it.
When everything is said and done, he only has silence.
Flynn fears whatever it is that Yuri is hiding will change them. That Yuri will change into something he cannot reach, cannot speak to, cannot touch. That Yuri is changing into a different Yuri who's completely the same save for the one looking at Flynn.
Why are you changing with me? What have I done… haven't done?
Where are you going that you won't let me follow?
Maybe it was pathetic, but Flynn wants to keep up with Yuri. In so many ways they were uneven, but in so many ways they were still side by side even if physically that was hard to do. Yet he felt like he was somewhere high up, and Yuri was letting himself sink down to points Flynn can't jump to. If he jumps, he damns them both.
But if he stays, he damns Yuri.
He doesn't know why Yuri won't take his hand, let him hang on to him. Eventually Flynn knows he'll break. He often did first. He'll throw the proper polite way of doing things aside and corner Yuri, because that was rapidly the only solution left.
What aren't you telling me?
Silence was not an answer Flynn plans to accept. Not anymore.
