A/N: Reviews are definitely welcome. No they are ENFORCED!


She woke up the next morning around 5am. She couldn't explain why but her eyes just fluttered open. Castle was asleep in the chair next to her bed with drool coming out of his mouth and falling onto his pants.

"Ew Castle," she laughed. She placed her hand back into his and tried to get more sleep.

The next time she woke up she smelled bacon and Coffee. Coffee is totally what she needs right now. She opened her eyes to find her hand cold and the man sitting beside her gone.

She didn't realize how much she loved this man until last night. She wishes she could be with him. But she's not ready yet. She still has far too much healing to do before she could enter into a real committed relationship.

She needs to get better. No more putting it off. No more procrastinating. She needs to get better for herself and for him.

The sun was shining through the window in her bedroom so she sat up and embraced how warm it felt on her skin. She stretched and got out the bed.

When she walked into the kitchen Castle was standing by the stove reading the paper. He didn't see her standing there. She couldn't help but take in the scene. Castle making her breakfast in bed and holding her at night while she slept. She liked the way it looked and now she knew she had to get better.

She walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table. He handed her a cup of de-caffeinated coffee so her nerves didn't get too worked up. He sat down opposite of her and laid the paper down beside him.

He looked up at her while she drank her coffee. She took a sip and the deliciously hot liquid simmered down her body warming her. It felt good. How does he make his coffee so good? She thought.

She took another sip this time closing her eyes as it ran its course down her body. She felt immediate relief and comfort from his coffee. She opened her eyes and found him staring intently at her.

She wanted to smile but suppressed it from showing.

"Kate," he started. She knew what was coming. But she didn't want to talk she just wanted to be in the moment, in the comfort of him. But she knew she couldn't let that show. They weren't that far along in their...relationship?

"Castle I know. You don't have to say anything."

"No I don't think you realize how bad you've gotten. You thought I was going to hurt you when you came out this morning. I saw how you reacted when I turned around to hand you your coffee."

Is that why she jumped? She hadn't really paid it any mind. "Castle I know you're not going to hurt me. And I'm telling you now that I'm fine," she said more to convince herself than him.

"No you're not. Do you remember what you said to me last night?"

Honestly besides Castle staying by her side she didn't remember much. "No."

"You told me that you didn't know why this was happening to you. And that you wanted this to stop."

"Castle I'm fine you know I was drinking so it influenced my behavior."

He tried not to think that was why she kissed him. He didn't even know if she remembered kissing him. But that's not important right now. Right now was about her and her health. She needs to get better. He needs his Kate back.

"That was more than just 'influenced behavior' Kate. We both know what's really going on. You need help."

"I'm already getting help Castle!" She blurted out. She didn't mean to say it, it just came out. She knew if she told him then we would ask questions. How long has she been seeing someone? Is it helping? Why didn't she say anything? What made her start getting the help? All questions she was sure she couldn't answer right now.

"Good," he said.

She was surprised that was all he said. But she knew from the look in his eyes that he needed more. "I started seeing him after I came back to work. He told me this case would bring up problems but I didn't listen. My only focus was to catch the sonofabitch killing these people."

"I understand. I do but you're not the only cop in the world. Ryan and Esposito can handle this case without you. You're not ready to handle this just yet."

"I think I am now. I don't know why but I feel like I can do this."

He sighed and put his head down an ran his fingers through his hair before looking back up at her. "Are you sure?"

"Yes. And I wouldn't be so sure if it wasn't for you Castle. If you didn't come over last night," she cut off and looked away. He could see she was trying hold back tears and he wanted so badly to reach out and comfort her. "I don't know what I would have done to myself."

One tear managed to make its way down her cheek and Castle took the opportunity to take his finger and gently wipe it away. He let his hand linger there on her cheek, caressing it with the back of his hand. She held it there on her cheek and closed her eyes. She couldn't take him looking at her like that. She could see how concerned he was but mostly she saw love. And she so desperately wanted to give it back. But she couldn't. Not yet.

"I should get ready. They'll be expecting me at the precinct."

Castle was shaking his head. "You're off this morning I asked Espo to cover for you."

"Castle!"

"No you need to take this time to rest. Maybe go talk to your doctor. But you are not going in yet."

She wanted to kiss him. He was right that's what she needed. She wanted sleep more than anything. How does this man do this to her? He drives her emotions up and down and always manages to surprise her.

She didn't know what to say so she just nodded and left for her room.

As she laid on her bed staring out the window she heard Castle in the kitchen. Most likely he was cleaning up the mess. She didn't touch her breakfast but it was okay. He didn't fix much and he would most likely make sure she had something to eat later today.

Wow. It was like they were together. He was taking care of her and she knew he would be there when she needed him. She's so in love with him. Maybe that was the pain she was feeling. She loved him so much that it hurt not to be with him. To not touch him or to hold him. She needs him. More now than ever. Without knowing it he crept his way into the deep corridors of her heart. A place no one has reached. She never allowed anyone to. But she let him in without knowing it. He squeezed past her walls and consumed her heart.

And now she thinks she loves him even more. He's taking care of her and he's waiting for her to get better before he brings up the kiss. Which was sweet.

"Castle?" She called out when she didn't hear anything coming from the kitchen. He peeked his head into her room almost instantly. She looked at him and held her hand out to him. He walked in and took it. She tugged him closer until he sat on the bed next to her. "Stay with me."

She took his arm and wrapped it around her body forcing him to lay down next to her. He rested his head down just above hers.

"We're gonna get through this," he whispered to her. She could feel his warm breath on her neck. It was soothing.

"I know. I'm gonna get better Castle. Don't worry about me too much. I'll get better and then-"

"I know." There was no more need to express any words. He knew what she was going to say. So then they could be together. He was just happy he got to hold her. Neither one of them moved the slightest until she had to get ready to go into the precinct. She was going to solve this case. With Castle at her side she knew she was safe. She was going to heal and they were going to be together. They just had to wait a little while longer.

Just a little.