~Olivia~
Why was he here? After all this time, why come back now, when I'm finally back on track? I groaned inwardly while scrutinizing the man who for twelve years had been my solace, my best friend. He seemed to be doing the same to me, making me feel self conscious. A bit more built, he had lost some of the weight gained during the last year we had worked together. His hair was the same thickness, which wasnt much, and he had a dusting of stubble across his lower face like he hadn't shaved for two days. I cleared my throat again and his gaze snapped from my legs back up to my face, his eyes boring into mine like a battle of wills, brown against blue. I simply turned and sat on a bed in the far corner of the room and began picking the peeling paint on the frame. He stayed where I left him. It was kind of symbolic of what he had done to me: walked away while I stayed where I had been. My lips twisted into a form of a smile at the irony. His expression grew worried at my seemingly sudden change of mood. He approached the bed and cautiously sat on the cot across form me. We had never been good at the whole heart to heart thing, preferring to act out what we needed communicated. I spoke first.
"How have you been?" My query seemed to take him by surprise. He shifted so he was perching on the side frame of the bed.
"I've been doing okay. I haven't been needing to work so I've been able to spend more time with my kids. They seem to like that. Kathy likes it. We've all been pretty content." He settled back into the uncomfortable silence, allowing me to process. He was still with Kathy which was good. I had always liked her and she made him happy. However the Elliot I had known wouldnt have lasted a week, let alone two years, without collaring someone. I pondered where he channeled all his pent up frustration when I remembered his muscles. I pointedly stared at his biceps, shifting between them and his torso, waiting for him to say what I was thinking. "Liv, I'm going crazy." I let out a chuckle, followed by another, which soon led into a full blown laughing frenzy. Through my spasms of hilarity, I could see his face still showcased a worried expression. He must think that I've finally lost it. I managed to stop seizing into fits of laughter. Wiping tears of mirth from my eyes, I straightened back up.
"I'm not surprised. The suburban life never seemed to fit you El." I let out a giggle, quite unlike me. "I'm not going to ask you why you're back here because that would just insult my knowledge of you. But I will ask you why now? What happened Stabler?" His face lapsed into one of ease.
"Liz and Dickie are both in high school now, so they don't particularly like me hanging around the house all day. Eli is in preschool at the church. Kathy is back nursing at the hospital. My house is so organized I feel like I live in a laboratory." He grimaced. I couldn't stop grinning, imagining him busying himself with an apron and feather duster, even though most people didn't use feather dusters anymore. He attempted to glare at me. I just kept smiling and had to start biting my lower lip to keep from laughing again. His expression broke from a stern glare into the shit-eating grin that I knew and loved. "To be completely straightforward here this definitley isn't the reaction I was expecting, Benson. Although you never have ceased to surprise me." His smile softened into one of tenderness and I felt a blush creep onto my cheeks like a leech.
"Well thanks, I guess." I attempted a weak chuckle, not liking the severity of the direction the conversation was turning. He leaned across the two foot space between the beds and clasped his hand over mine, giving it a gentle squeeze for a man of his size. I gazed at his hand enveloping mine, reveling in how big it was, how masculine. I hadn't even noticed how large his hands were in all the years we had spent passing files and going undercover together. I realized I was fixating on an entirely unimportant thing and that an awkward silence had stretched through the duration of my observations. I looked up to find his face inches from mine. "Whoa, hello there. Invading personal space one of your new hobbies?" I leaned away, getting dizzy from his proximity.
