Thanks for reading :) Trying to edit and post this fairly quickly.

Princess Leia Organa swept through the corridor on her way to her quarters, unable to get the conversation with the Corellian pilot out of her mind. He seemed nice enough, beneath that hard, smug exterior. Of course, the way he had let her know that he was the Tharen woman's consort had been crude and inappropriate. But she supposed she could forgive that little lapse in propriety.

That thought almost caused her to laugh aloud. Propriety. She knew of Solo's reputation. He might be serving the Rebels at the moment, but he was undoubtedly a mercenary at heart. He had made it clear that he didn't wish to officially join the Rebel Alliance. She wondered at his motivation for helping for as long as he had. Was he with the Rebellion strictly for Bria?

Stop it, Leia, she scolded herself. He may be handsome, but he's taken. And you would never be seriously interested in someone like him anyway.

Not that she was seriously interested in anyone.

Her thoughts wandered to Wesley Tobin. Sometimes it amazed her that she had let him as close to her as she had. The former Imperial Lieutenant had always been devastatingly handsome. Leia had thought so from the first time they had met at Imperial Center on Coruscant. He came from a wealthy family on Commenor, and so was accustomed to a life of luxury, just as Leia had been, before she had been forced underground. They had been good friends, and Wesley had always wanted more. Before the destruction of Alderaan...

The familiar pain gripped her again, as it always did when she thought of her home world. The dull throb permeated her soul, which was why she tried so hard to focus on anything but her loss.

She closed her eyes and slowed her gait, trying to bring her emotions under control. She couldn't allow anyone to see her private agony, not even Wesley. While still a member of the Senate, she had maintained her distance from Wesley, claiming her dedication to politics as an excuse. They had managed a warm friendship, but his intentions were always crystal clear.

After Alderaan's destruction...

She opened her eyes again, her shaky rigidity restored. Wesley had defected from the Empire, searching for and finding her cell of the Alliance. With Leia's recommendation, he was instantly given the high rank of Major.

She wasn't sure if his main concern had been the Alliance or her. She remembered that first week after Wesley had arrived. She had been plodding along, barely holding herself together, not allowing anyone close enough to see how badly she was affected. She sought out the distraction of endless work, and the only friendship she had, Luke Skywalker. Somehow, through everything they had been through together, they had formed a quick bond, which Leia held onto tightly. She had no one else.

And then Wesley arrived. The only person remaining from a distant, broken past. He swept into her life without warning, bringing a strange sort of comfort with him. The one remnant of her past, he was like an old blanket.

Leia fell into her bed, spent and distraught. Thoughts of Alderaan haunted her today, more ruthlessly than usual. It had been a standard month now, and she was no closer to sanity than she had been when it first happened. During the day, distractions were easy. There was no shortage of work to be done and Leia drove herself endless, often working double and triple shifts. But eventually, when she was swaying on her feet, she was forced to retire to her quarters. And there, with nothing else to hold her attention, Leia was hit with a fresh wave of sorrow that reminded her that she was far from over the tragedy.

Why should I be? she asked herself. I have nothing left, nothing to fight for.

But she was still fighting. What else could she do? She couldn't allow the Empire's reign of terror to claim another planet full of innocent lives.

The tears came then, burning her eyes with the vision of the explosion that had claimed Alderaan and completely changed who she was.

The door chimed, and Leia considered ignoring it, until she heard Wesley's voice come through with a strength she had been lacking for so long now.

"Leia? Leia, are you in there?"

She lay there quietly, trying to catch her breath.

His voice assaulted her ears again, forcing her to pay attention. "Leia, if you're in there, please let me in? Please."

She stood and went to the door, swiping a hand across her face to remove the evidence of her vulnerability. When the door slid open, Wesley entered her small room, took one look at her and enfolded her within his strong arms, whispering soft words of comfort.

And she allowed it. For once, and only once, she allowed herself to be weak in the presence of another. Perhaps it was their friendship; perhaps it was the fact that he was a link to her past. Whatever the reason, she allowed him to hold her, stroke her hair, soothe her shoulders.

And when he kissed her, caressed her in a way that was beyond friendship, Leia allowed that too. It just felt so good to be touched, held, to let go her icy demeanor with one person. She found herself responding.

Since that night, they had shared a passionate relationship. In the beginning, Wesley had professed his love for her, telling her that he had loved her all along, had only been waiting for her to be ready. Leia found she could not return his declaration. She cared for him, truly she did. But love...she wasn't sure she was capable of it anymore. Perhaps her cold demeanor was not completely a facade.

After a time, Wesley had stopped telling her he loved her, thank the Force. She assumed he had held onto the hope of his words being returned, but when he realized it was not going to happen, he must have tried to maintain his dignity.

It was easier to be with Wesley than to not be. She received from him the affection and warmth that she could not have sought out otherwise. If they hadn't shared that first night together, she imagined she would never have let anyone close to her.

The only other people she allowed in her life were Luke and General Rieekan. Rieekan, as an old family friend, could hardly be dismissed. And Luke...somehow, Luke understood her in a way that stunned her. He almost seemed to know what she was thinking at times. It was somewhat frightening, thinking that someone might see inside her head like that. If it was the Force, or simply coincidence, she couldn't say. But he was someone she needed in her life. She knew that. Still, like everyone else, even Wesley, she kept him at arms' length to a degree. She couldn't bring herself to truly open up to anyone. She knew that Wesley was endlessly frustrated by this, but she couldn't help it, it was who she had become. Wesley could share her bed, he could share her life, but he could never truly be allowed to see her soul.

Arriving at her quarters, Leia decided to stop thinking about the shortcomings in her relationships. She entered her access code and the door slid open, showing her that Wesley was not there. She sighed, relieved. She wasn't in the mood tonight to play the role that everything was alright. She just wanted to be alone, to be herself. Regardless of how bitter and depressing that might be.