Should I eat Captain Crunch or fruity pebbles for breakfast? I hold up the boxes in front of me, delegating between the two cartoon mascots. I have practice today and a fight later on in the week. I should be making a protein smoothie and sucking it down like the champ I believe I could be, but lately I'm all about self-deprecation, so Captain Crunch it is.

Speaking of self-deprecation, I can't get that Axel guy out of my head. Our encounter yesterday was so weird. Who runs out of a hospital with a bleeding wound? That's some crazy shit.

I could probably call the tabloids and make some serious dough. The hospital could spit the profit with me if they were to 'leak' the camera footage.

My cereal clinks in the bowl, before I begin pouring my milk.

"Is that cereal I smell? I hope you saved me some." Sora walks in with a limp I recognize, he's wearing hastily put on PJs that makes me think he wasn't wearing them moments before. He gets down his own bowl and pours himself a matching breakfast.

Sora's my brother, my twin, he moved down to live with me in Twilight Town last year. Immediately, he began doing what he loved. He's making it big, a Blitz-Ball player on the cusp of stardom. I've seen him play, watched him practice—he's got real talent and an honest passion that makes everybody love him. It's why the media can't get enough of their rising star.

I'm glad that he came out here to be with me. Our apartment is small, but it's the nicest place I've ever lived, I'm sure that compared to where Sora grew up this could be considered a shit-hole. It's got two bedrooms, roommate style, so they're mostly the same size. We're lucky enough to have our own bathrooms, and a landlord that doesn't mind if we paint. The kitchen is tiny, but it has a small bar and the living room doubles as a dining room—the couch is in the middle of the room with a small square table behind it. We have a decent sized T.V. and a compiled music and DVD collection.

Our space is a mash of our two personalities, Sora's items have color everywhere with flowing shapes and hardly anything matches. Mine are sets, black and white or muted colors with set patterns or shapes—I'm particularly fond of checkered.

It's a little rough on the eyes, but its home.

"You know Riku doesn't have to sneak out," I say taking a bite. "I know about you two, going steady, and all that."

He makes a face at me, tongue out, nose scrunched, it's real classy for a twenty year old, and I laugh. Sora's expression turns almost confused and then happy. Oh, right. I don't laugh anymore. I just feel really good today.

Sora takes his breakfast to the table, eating his cereal with gusto. I shovel more of the sugar cubes into my mouth before pouring myself a second bowl, and then I move to join him.

"For your information, Riku's gone. He had to catch an early Gummy ship for work." Sora flicks on the T.V. Axels face pops up and some preppy reporter bitch is talking about him like he invented Struggle. Why do they have to use that picture? He looks so cocky there, so not like a real person. I think back to the tall man in the hospital gown, still cocky, but not intolerable. He was full of charm, and wit.

I shake my head. I hated him yesterday. I told him to affectively kill himself by jumping off of a building.

"So, is Riku up for promotion?" He works at this firm. Its real boring stuff, consulting, I think.

"Yeah," Sora says excitedly, his mouth full. "Even though he's the bosses son everyone totally wants him to take the job, it just means he has to work a lot more. When I work I run drills, or smile at people in stadiums. He has to fill out paper work and have meetings and blah blah blah. I'm so proud of him, don't get me wrong, I just wish…" Sora tapers off as his face creeps into a slow blush. "Sorry."

"Its cool." I say. "I don't mind. When I work I hit stuff."

He laughs and I echo him. I know he's trying to read me like he used to be able to, but that telepathy twin thing hasn't worked in a while. Not for a very long time in fact.

"You're chatty today."

I shrug rolling my shoulders; I'm tense for no reason. It's not a particularly invasive statement, but that's how it feels. "Sorry."

"No, Rox." There's this annoyed ugh sound that he makes. "Its good, just strange. Good strange. Did anything happen?" His face streams with positive outlook, up turned half-smile, eyes shining, the whole bit. If it were anyone else, I'd wonder what drugs they were taking, but not Sora. It's just how he is.

"I met Axel." I motion lazily to the T.V. "He was at the hospital yesterday."

Sora stands up suddenly. "He's famous."

"You're famous."

"I'm almost famous, there's a difference." I roll my eyes. "What's he like? How tall is he really?" Sora is a buzz, hoping from out foot to the other as he interrogates me. He reminds me of the reporter bitch, hovering and asking all sorts of mundane questions. Is that your natural color? Do you like bubble baths? With which hand do you hold your penis when you pee? I don't understand it.

"He's just a guy." I say. "A weird one, but just a dude really. And I'd say about 6'3."

"How'd you meet?"

So I tell him the story, even the part where I told him he could jump off of a building. My brother is gaping at me with a happy schoolgirl crush kind of expression. Here I was thinking that Axel was kind of okay in person, but if he turns people into idiots I'm not so sure.

"That's crazy."

"Great input there Sora, thanks." My bowls empty, I push it to the middle of the table. Sora punches me in the arm playfully, it's a pathetic hit, but I still glare at him.

He doesn't even bat an eyelash. "You think you're ever going to see him again?"

I laugh, a bark, a hah! "Yeah right. On TV special and in spreads on Struggle magazine, but never in person."

"You could be in those magazines one day, and then you'll meet again face to face and fall in looooooovveeee." All right, someone's been watching to many of those romantic comedies.

"Yeah." I put on my best dopey voice. "He was making a break for it while I was visiting my comatose friend, and it was just the way he bled everywhere that made me think. 'This is the one.' Get real." I fidget with the bracelet cuff I never take off.

"It could happen."

"Don't be stupid. It'll happen when Riku gets you pregnant."

Sora busts out laughing, knee slapping, the whole bit, and I'm smiling and then joining in this crazy loud fit of laugher. It's been a long time since I laughed in earnest.

Though the cuff around my wrist feels too tight, as if laughter makes it shrink and there's this image of headstones in my head and Hayner on that stupid machine that makes that stupid whoosh noise. I clutch my wrist, feeling dizzy all of a sudden. I don't get to be happy. I don't deserve laughter.

It's gone quiet. I snap out of it. There was a time when that would've sent me into a full episode but I've learned how to keep them at bay until I'm in private. I pick at the threads in my bracelet, I'll have to get a new one soon, this ones practically falling apart.

I am calm and collected and fine. Sora's looking at me funny and I have half a mind to act like nothings wrong, but its exhausting putting on a show for someone I already know sees me breaking down. However, I have to go before he try's to help, to say something, or make me feel better. I sound like such a snot when I say that him attempting to comfort me is the worst. There's nothing he can do, but Gods if he doesn't try anyway.

I'm an asshole, and I add it to the list of things I have to feel bad about, but for now I have to go.

"I'm late for practice." I say as I'm already moving, quickly placing my bowl in the sink and hurrying into my room before he can say another word.

~.~

Just filling out the story more before Axel takes up a huge role in it. Promise lots to come. ^^ If anyone cares this is some of the music I listened to while writing this chapter.

Ride This Out ~ Imaginary Cities

I believe (Get Over Yourself) ~ Nico Vega

Two Fingers ~Jake Bugg

Car Radio ~Twenty One Pilots.

Also, Sorry if there are typos.