Part Two
It took a lot of mental preparation and pacing back and fourth until he'd stopped purely for the fear of wearing away his carpet but Edd finally gathered enough courage to face what he'd been putting off. Inhaling deeply, he made his way across the cul-de-sac, telling himself that he was no longer a child. Besides, it was only Eddy. He'd have to deal with many upsets throughout his life, no doubt with people he'd be considerably less comfortable with. That's not to say he was comfortable around Eddy. In fact, he was always on edge, especially when they were close... physically, and he had no idea why.
Double D's confidence dissipated as he reached the beginning of Eddy's front yard, the grass below his feet flattening beneath his weight as he stood staring at his friend's bedroom window. He bit his lip anxiously, every worry that'd spurred on his frenzied behaviour the night before smacking him in the chest and making his knees weak. He felt as though he were at a cross road. Should he knock on the door and try to talk Eddy's parents into letting him see Eddy, or tap politely on Eddy's bedroom window, the way he and Ed usually did? He should have brought something to cheer Eddy up, like cookies or soup... maybe he wouldn't be hungry. Perhaps things would go better if Ed were there too... no, Edd didn't want him mixed up in this. Chances were Eddy would get fed up quickly if the atmosphere was too... Ed. Double D pulled the side of his hat absent-mindedly. 'It's now or never, I suppose,' he mumbled, pushing himself to continue forward until he was standing outside Eddy's room.
Edd didn't quite know what to expect, if truth be told. He assumed Eddy would be in bed, considering it was a Saturday. Afternoon or not, Eddy was a teenage boy and although his sleeping pattern differed from Edd's, it was somewhat stereotypical. Edd guessed that there'd be half-empty plates and discarded trash scattered about his semi-cluttered room. He also pictured the presence of a certain type of reading material but that was besides the point and hardly unexpected.
A sharp creaking sound filled the quiet atmosphere of the cul-de-sac as wood slid against wood, a familiar sound which rattled Edd's mind. He snapped out of his nervous thoughts in sheer terror upon hearing the sound of the door opening, taking a step back and almost toppling over some of the supplies that had been hanging around after their dating service escapade. Eddy frowned from across the yard, leaning on the door frame to his room, an amused smirk playing on his lips.
'E-Eddy? But I thought... how...' Edd struggled to find the right combination of words through his confusion and settled on a simple yet somewhat inadequate, "What?"
There was a long pause before either of them spoke, Double D standing awkwardly on Eddy's lawn as his friend stared at him as though he were some kind of circus act. It was quite unsettling. He cleared his throat and drew in a long breath. 'How are you?' Suddenly he felt rather guilty as Eddy raised an eyebrow, remaining silent. He didn't appear at all depressed. In fact, he looked... good. His hair was slightly damp from a recent shower and he had a sort of content glow about him, the exact opposite to his appearance the previous time Edd had seen him. He honestly believed that something awful had happened to his spirit concerning a certain blonde individual... and himself. He'd assumed that Eddy was jealous or at least disgruntled by the hard beating his ego had endured. Maybe he hadn't given the boy enough credit. Besides, it wasn't like Eddy wasn't used to feeling rejected. Having said that, it still bugged Edd that he wasn't enough. He didn't reject Eddy, in fact, he and Ed were the only people who were proud enough to admit that they were friends with him, despite Eddy's reputation.
Double D swallowed, reluctant to move. Why wasn't Eddy saying anything? Not only was it unlike him but surely he had something to say about the whole thing. Suddenly the shorter boy folded his arms across his broad chest.
'Where the fuck have ya been?'
That was it? Edd snorted in derision, his mood switching unnaturally quickly from wary to irritated. 'I could ask you the same question! Do you realise how worried I've been?' Feeling slightly exposed by the question, he felt the need to add, 'Ed and I, I mean... we... what on Earth is the matter with you? I expected various different scenarios but... but this!? You could have at least had the decency to-'
'Stop yellin', Sockhead, jeez,' Eddy retorted, interrupting him and disappeared into his room. Edd glared after him, before deciding that it would indeed be best to have the conversation somewhere more private than outside for the whole neighbourhood to hear. He followed Eddy, stepping into the place he'd started to miss during Eddy's brief absence from his life. Sure, it had only been a few days but it felt like a life time to Edd. They rarely spent more than a day apart and even that was bad enough. He was beginning to think Eddy didn't feel the same way.
He closed the door behind him before facing his smug friend. 'Do you mind telling me what's going on here? I believe I at least deserve and explanation, Eddy.'
Eddy scoffed, mimicking Edd's reaction to his seemingly unscathed exterior. 'What d'ya mean? I wouldn't need to explain shit if you'd been here.' He flailed his arms lazily before collapsing onto his old circular bed. Despite his body language, his tone was unusually calm, making Edd uncomfortable. Despite this he opened his mouth to reply but closed it again as he realised how correct Eddy was. He'd been too scared of rejection himself to check up on him sooner. It was stupid and downright illogical. He mentally slapped himself. He still had many questions but he could have avoided their swift build up by simply asking Eddy everything... or being there to listen at least. He'd failed to do either and that made him feel ridiculously sheepish.
'Well, I'm here now,' Edd reasoned stubbornly, frowning down at Eddy's shaggy carpet. He felt too ashamed of himself to even consider eye contact with his best friend. That alone made his chest feel tight as his breaths became shallow. They weren't supposed to be awkward around each other, even if it was one-sided.
Eddy chuckled softly, staring up at his old and partially faded mirror ball, watching the afternoon light, reflected in its many faces. 'Guessin' you've been busy. Ya know, with homework or whatever.' He rolled his eyes back towards Edd who looked away in embarrassment, processing the comment. It filled him with fresh anger. He felt his fists tighten as he shifted his weight and willed himself not to start ranting the way he usually did. Eddy would just zone out or yell back and he didn't want to be situated with either familiar scenario.
'Actually,' he sneered, keeping his tone as calm as possible with a racing mind and heart. God, he'd been so stupid but the last thing he was about to do was lie. 'I exhausted most of my energy trying to figure out a solution to your inexplicable predicament.' He jabbed a finger in Eddy's direction, attempting to look accusing but failing as his hand shook slightly. 'Apparently I wasted my time.' Eddy blinked up at him, his features void of any amusement now. He frowned slightly and looked away.
'It was that obvious, huh?'
'Obvious?' Edd spluttered, flailing his arms in disbelief. 'Eddy, you weren't... there. You weren't yourself. As a matter of fact, you still aren't.' He shook his head, setting his jaw and sighing loudly before making his way over to Eddy's bed and perched on it cautiously. Eddy's gaze had fallen so much that Edd could no longer see his eyes, hidden behind a thick wall of eyelashes. 'Please, Eddy, just confirm the reason behind your recent behaviour. Perhaps I can help, or just-'
'No,' Edd was cut off by a soft whisper. He'd never heard anything like it from the boy in front of him. Maybe... maybe he really wasn't willing to share anything with him after all. Perhaps he'd had his chance and he'd blown it. That thought was sickening and made Edd swallow his nerves. He opened his mouth to reply and plead a little before finally accepting the new boundaries of their relationship when Eddy looked up to meet his eye once again. The blue of his irises seemed brighter than before, as though their depth was returning with each passing second. Double D blinked back at him, afraid to move or break the connection he'd been craving. 'I need to ask you something, Double D.'
'G-go ahead,' he stammered in response, hating the sharpness of his voice compared to Eddy's.
Eddy sighed, pushing himself into a more comfortable position. 'Do you like Nazz?'
Silence.
Edd panicked, his eyes wide and unblinking as his brain clouded with the many ways he could reply to the unexpected question. Did he like Nazz? Did he like Nazz? No. She was pretty, stereotypically speaking. She was cute and funny. She was also innocently vain and that made it appear as though she lacked common-sense. She didn't belong with someone like Double D. Or Eddy, for that matter. She could do better, socially. But wait. Was Eddy asking out of pure jealousy? Nazz did seem to show a mild interest in Edd, on a regular basis in fact, but that didn't mean she wanted to date him. Right? If so, Edd could say that the feeling was mutual.
Eddy pushed Edd's shoulder irritably when he didn't receive an answer, the question evidently important to him. Double D snapped out of his daze, blushing slightly from the contact as well as embarrassment, his shoulder tingling faintly. 'No... no! Of course I don't like Nazz. Romantically, I mean. She's... she's nice, I suppose, but she makes me rather ill at ease. I much prefer,' he cleared his throat, his cheeks heating up a second time. 'Other company.'
Eddy squinted at him, despite relaxing at his awkward explanation.
'Besides, I know you're interested in her affections. I'm not one to deceive a good friend. You know that.'
Eddy nodded. This was indeed quite true. His confidence on the matter seemed to restore itself. 'Didn't doubt ya, Sockhead,' he proclaimed, smirking slightly. 'And you're wrong,' he added, watching Edd squirm under the notion. 'I ain't,' he lifted his hands to make quotation marks. '"Interested in her affections".'
Edd frowned in confusion. 'You aren't?' He noted the emphasis on the word "her".
Eddy snorted with amusement. 'Nah!' Then he looked away, his insecurities becoming evident. 'I was jealous.'
'… of me?'
'Of Nazz.'
Did... did this mean...? No... 'Eddy,' Double D lifted his hand to gently push Eddy's chin until their faces were once again parallel. His hand remained there, however. Suddenly, all of his anxieties had melted away. He felt sane again, comfortable in Eddy's presence, and best of all, wanted. 'What exactly did you hope to accomplish with that ridiculous scam?'
Eddy didn't hesitate, his eyes widening in a willing excitement to explain himself, as though it had been eating away at him for a while. 'I was tryin' to prove to myself that feelin' so attached to you,' he paused, reaching up to move Edd's hand away by cupping it lightly and lowering it to their sides. 'Didn't mean I wasn't normal. I kinda panicked and decided the easiest thing to do would be to get myself a girl. Nazz is always, ya know... around.'
Edd frowned. He hated seeing Eddy so lost and he hated it even more when he was kept in the dark about it. Eddy felt ashamed of their friendship? He could understand that. Eddy was always insecure, making sure he didn't look like a jackass, and as a result, making himself look twice the jackass. It was a vicious cycle. Double D figured he couldn't get mad. It was endearing, in a way.
'Alright,' he accepted the explanation warily, sliding his hand out from beneath Eddy's and internally winced as the boy looked a little disappointed. 'There's just... something I don't understand.'
'What?' Eddy now looked desperate to answer whatever happened to be plaguing his friend, his eyebrows pushed high onto his forehead.
'Why have you been shutting yourself away? It's unhealthy and you don't appear to be as upset as I'd anticipated.' His voice still sounded stern but he had to know. He'd spent most of his life pandering to Eddy and he wasn't about to give in this time without every single answer. He respected his honesty but he felt... no, he knew that Eddy was hiding something from him.
Eddy huffed as though it was precisely the subject he was hoping to avoid. Edd nodded encouragingly, softening his expression slightly. 'You sound like my mom,' he mumbled before his frown dissipated. He didn't want to scare him off now. Not after everything they'd been through. 'I was sulking, okay? I wanted you to be worried about me. Kinda selfish, huh?' He folded his arms across his chest, attempting to disguise his embarrassment, hoping Edd would mistake it for impatience. He didn't. 'And I guessed you 'n' Nazz went on a date or somethin'. It pissed me off.'
Edd smiled warmly, silently thanking Eddy for being so honest for once. 'You... pissed yourself off,' Edd tried mimicking his language awkwardly, earning a hearty snicker. 'Of course I was worried. For goodness sake, Eddy, I spend the majority of my time worrying about you!' There was a long pause, their eye contact the only thing that either of them were aware of. It swallowed up their surroundings. 'I'm sorry. I was scared too. I didn't think you needed me any more.'
Eddy frowned, his heart flipping at the ludicrous apology. He hadn't meant to make him feel guilty... much, and of course he needed him. More than he needed oxygen. He exhaled, adrenaline suddenly taking over his senses. He couldn't believe what he was about to do, yet, he knew it was coming. It had taken him a while to realise it, but it would have happened eventually. They were weak without one another and although Ed was their missing piece, and always would be, they were whole enough together to conquer the world.
'For a brainiac, you ain't so smart,' he remarked. Before Edd could retort, his face showing how offended he felt, Eddy leaned forward, closing his eyes and smirking despite the heavy atmosphere and let his lips brush gently against Double D's who instinctively reached out to place a hand on Eddy's chest. Instead of attempting to resist the kiss, as Eddy had momentarily feared, he folded his fingers into the material of his shirt and tugged gently until their lips moulded together effortlessly and a rhythm was discovered between them. Perhaps it was natural. All they knew was that it felt right and necessary, like it had been the one thing stopping their hearts from feeling full. Eddy pulled him closer but before he could descend into the amazing feeling of claiming Double D's lips, the more hesitant of the two pulled away. Eddy opened his eyes in confusion, blinking wildly and making Edd chuckle lightly.
'Don't get ahead of yourself, Eddy.' He moved his hands up to straighten out the collar he'd almost wrinkled between his fingers. He gazed at Eddy with half-lidded eyes. 'I still have to explain everything from the many classes you've failed to attend.'
Eddy threw him a dumbfounded look, confused by the boy's seductive stare which failed to compliment his choice in topic in any way, shape or form. 'You gotta be kiddin'-'
'I'm quite serious!' Double D interrupted him sternly and although there was something rather mocking in the depths of his tone, Eddy still couldn't help but frown in dismay. 'You'll love it,' he added, finally grinning and sliding off of the bed before Eddy could argue further. 'I'll go get some supplies then, yes?'
Eddy watched as he darted out of the room. What was he thinking? He was the master of avoiding school work and Double D knew that better than anyone. Something about his new found attitude told Eddy that they'd be doing more than just studying.
End. LJ~
