Sorry for the delay on this chapter. Thank you to those who reviewed/followed/favorited this story. Your feedback is very much appreciated and encouraged!
20th Ward
Friday
16 Nov 2012
11:00 AM
Haruhi narrowed her steely eyes at the young woman across the table and subconsciously stabbed through a piece of salted chicken with her chopsticks. A heavy silence had long since fallen over the two, only disturbed by the frustratingly present sound of the younger woman's pencil scratching across the notebook paper as she took notes from the large biology book in front of her, occasionally turning the page with undue haste. The noise was slowly driving the raven-haired investigator insane. She timed each turn of the page in her head as if it would distract her from the annoyingly frantic scratching of the pencil only to find that it was actually pushing her closer and closer toward dissolving into a psychotic meltdown.
Patience expiring, Haruhi quickly reached across the table to slap her hand down on the open book, causing the teen to jump in surprise. "Put the book away already," she ordered, exasperation etched across her face, "haven't you done enough studying?"
She sighed dejectedly and complied, putting down the pencil and slamming the large textbook shut. "Sorry," she apologized, "I'm just a bit anxious, I guess." Haruhi arched an eyebrow at her apology. It wasn't at all out of character to see Yuuhi studying so intently. The anxious teen was a hardworking student ranked at the very top of her class in the junior academy. She took great pride in her academics, but when it came to exams, she was reduced to a tense ball of nerves.
Haruhi popped a ball of rice into her mouth and fixed her sister with a vacant stare. "You'll just wipe yourself out if you study too much," she warned, to which the diligent student rolled her eyes.
"I'd rather study too much than not enough," she reasoned, resting an elbow on the table and propping her chin up in a petulant manner. Yuuhi narrowed her eyes toward her solemn older sister. "How would you know, anyway? You didn't even graduate from the academy…"
Haruhi's lips curved into a cheeky grin, one that the girl was all too familiar with. "We'll just call it a hunch."
"Whatever," she pouted, though her lips formed a discernable smile. "I guess I just find it kind of interesting. I was just reading about how ghouls have a metabolic rate that's nearly 3000 times faster than the average human which is why they're able to recover from injuries so quickly after a meal. Some are even capable of regenerating entire limbs…" Her eyes fell to the biology book resting on the table, an excitable expression on her face. She ran her fingers absentmindedly over the cover.
"Is that what they have you reading about?" Haruhi questioned condescendingly. Yuuhi rolled her eyes. "I could have told you that. I've seen ghouls get their heads chopped off just to grow a whole new one." The young girl seemed unsure of her sister's words, fixing her with a narrow stare in an effort to break her poker face.
When she didn't falter, Yuuhi's expression softened, and she leaned forward with wide curious eyes. "… Have you really?" she questioned.
The investigator let out a half-chuckle. "Of course not." Yuuhi sighed irritably much to her sister's amusement.
Haruhi stared across the cafeteria and gnawed on her lip. Her bento sat before her half eaten and almost entirely forgotten despite the grip she had on the chopsticks. She never finished her lunch, and she was beginning to make a habit out of giving her leftovers to the white-haired troublemaker who had become an almost constant presence these past few days. Haruhi didn't much mind him looming over her as she worked because the eccentric conversations he offered seemed to make the time pass by quicker. He reminded her of Yuuhi in a lot of ways - especially in the way he watched her so closely, intrigued by anything and everything she did. Yuuhi often followed closely behind her sister when they were younger, eager to learn from her example. She grew out of that habit around the time she entered the academy, but Haruhi admittedly missed her sister's innocent curiosity. It had a way of making her feel more important than she really was.
She pushed the bento across the table, interrupting her sister's deep thoughts. "You can have the rest if you want," she offered peaceably.
Yuuhi's expression softened and she shook her head. "Thanks, but I'm not hungry." Haruhi shrugged, wordlessly taking the bento back and putting it away. "Was Dad too busy to take a lunch break with us?"
"He has a lot of paperwork to get done," she explained. "I was planning to work through lunch as well so I could give him a hand, but he insisted I take a break."
Yuuhi frowned. "Oh... So you haven't been doing much investigating then, I take it?"
Haruhi released a yawn, stretching her arms out in front of her. "Not really. We're still getting settled so there's a lot of meetings and paperwork and those types of things. Nothing too exciting."
"That sounds boring," Yuuhi smiled sympathetically to which Haruhi nodded in exaggerated agreement. Her sister knew just how eager she was to wield her quinque in battle once again. When Haruhi and Makio were stationed in the 11th ward, the teen was often left alone to worry after them. It baffled her how indifferent they were in the face of danger, unconcerned with the odds of losing their lives at the end of a ghoul's kagune when it came down to doing their jobs as investigators. "It's our duty to protect Tokyo at all costs," her father would so simply explain to her when she posed her concerns, but it did little to ease her mind. Such unremitting courage and loyalty was lost on her. But surely, she thought, she could find that courage within herself before too long.
Haruhi sighed deeply at the thought of returning to her cubicle for the rest of the day. Her workspace was located directly between Juuzou and Takizawa, who looked to be developing a strong dislike for one another. "You have no idea," she grumbled, leaning forward to rest against the table. Yuuhi began gathering her materials and putting them away in her book bag as she prepared to leave. She was allowed only an hour for lunch and still had to catch a train to get back to school.
The sisters were suddenly interrupted by a nervous voice, one Haruhi recognized immediately. "Um, sorry to bother you…" Seidou stood next to the table, an uncomfortable expression on his face. He had one hand in the pocket of his slacks and the other in his suit as if he were reaching for something. Haruhi looked at him expectantly with the curious arch of her brow, her head subconsciously tilting to the side.
He pulled a familiar piece of cloth from the inside of his suit jacket, stuttering, "I-I wanted to return this to you." She recognized it as the handkerchief she had lent to him the other day after Juuzou had busted his nose. The last time she had seen the small handkerchief, it had been almost completely saturated with his blood, but as he held it out to her now, it appeared to be as pristine and white as she once remembered it. Her gaze shifted up to his face where she could see the swelling around his nose had gone down dramatically. She could just make out the hint of a crescent moon shaped bruise that stretched down the side of his nose to curve beneath his right eye. He nervously scratched at his cheek, eyes looking anywhere but at her.
How peculiar, she thought.
"I appreciate it, but you really didn't have to give this back," she told him, taking the handkerchief from him and folding it neatly before putting it away in the breast pocket of her blazer. "It's just a piece of cloth. I have plenty of others." He smiled at her, a crooked smile full of apprehension and overwhelming sincerity that left her with a strange feeling in the pit of her stomach. Haruhi eyed him curiously, the rosy tint to his cheeks causing her mild concern. Surely he wasn't getting ill, she contemplated, her lips pursed in thought. He seemed just fine when she greeted him and Houji this morning.
Her mind drifted to the incident just a few days ago, the morning Juuzou punched him in the face. "I didn't think you were the compassionate type," her father had teased after she returned to the conference room with Seidou. But he was right; Haruhi was hardly the type to go out of her way to help or comfort others in distress. When it came to work, she wasn't particularly expressive or conversational, instead choosing to keep her nose to the grindstone and focus on performing her duties to the best of her ability. It was a characteristic she shared with her father who was infamous among his colleagues for his exceptional work ethic. So what possessed her to do something so out of character?
"Takizawa?" Yuuhi questioned, eyes roaming the brunette's face. Haruhi turned to give her sister a strange look. "You gave a lecture to my class at the academy just a month ago, I believe." Seidou blinked in surprise. A coy smile met the girl's lips as he let out a nervous laugh.
"Oh, yeah," he said, reaching back to scratch a nonexistent itch at the back of his head. "It was a brief lesson on quinques, if I recall correctly." He narrowed his eyes contemplatively as he thought back on the lecture.
Yuuhi nodded and shifted in her seat so that she was directly facing the young man. Haruhi rolled her eyes. "Yes, that was it!" she exclaimed as the recognition hit her. "I learned some very valuable things from your lecture. My instructor said I've greatly improved at my quinque exercises. All I did was remember what you said about thinking of the quinque as an extension of the body instead of a weapon, and planting your feet firmly…"
"That's really kind of you to say," he chuckled, "I'm glad you got something out of it."
"I wanted to speak to you afterwards, but I was too afraid…" she admitted with a timid laugh as the young man's chest swelled with pride. Truthfully, he had left the class feeling rather exasperated by the students' apparent disinterest in his lecture. They treated him as if the time he had taken for them meant nothing at all, and he couldn't resist addressing those that rudely chattered amongst themselves while he was trying to teach. The scathing looks subsequently directed at him were nothing short of gratifying.
The last thing Seidou expected to hear was that he had imparted knowledge upon somebody who had actually used it. For whatever reason, he had the girl's unwarranted respect and admiration. It was a strangely satisfying feeling.
Haruhi smiled sardonically, giving the young woman across from her a teasing look. "You see, my poor sister is rather spineless," she ribbed, to which Yuuhi pouted childishly. She scoffed at the mirthful tone of her voice.
"That – That's not true at all!" she anxiously proclaimed, reaching across the table to smack the caustic woman only for her to move away.
Seidou smiled thoughtfully. "You shouldn't be afraid to speak to me," he encouraged her, "it's not as if I'm somebody important." He let out a chuckle, but his eyes betrayed a strong sense of hopelessness, a painfully earnest despair that left Haruhi with a strange, hollow feeling in her chest. She wondered what could possibly warrant such melancholy. Houji had mentioned that he graduated near the top of his class, an impressive feat considering the skilled investigators known to come out of the academy. Haruhi was admittedly surprised to discover this considering the young man's sheepishness. He was meek and fidgety as though he lacked the confidence to stand proudly alongside his peers.
Haruhi knew all too well what it was like to feel inferior to those around her. Designated a Rank 3 investigator at only sixteen, many of her colleagues doubted her abilities and mocked her for her lack of experience or formal education. Some speculated that her designation was due only to her father's status within the CCG. Of course, she went on to earn their respect through marvelous feats of strength and skill — not that she was ever looking for it. She still gets the occasional dirty look and snide remark every now and then from those who outrank her, but she meets the criticism with the stalwart dignity of a battle-hardened soldier, just as her father taught her.
Haruhi's mouth was moving before she even realized what she was saying. "You must be something if Houji-san took you under his wing," she affirmed, breaking her taciturn silence. "It's not as though just anybody could earn that right." Seidou pursed his lips in a thoughtful expression, gaze straying from her stormy eyes.
"Yeah, I guess that's true," he reluctantly conceded.
"Since you're here, I suppose you are the best person to ask." Yuuhi spared her sister a spiteful glance as she reached into her bag to fish out a pen and notepad. "I'm having trouble grasping certain concepts regarding ghoul biology, specifically their 'immunity'. Just how is it that ghouls are biologically immune to damage dealt by man-made objects like knives and guns, but are still capable of being fatally injured by an acute transfer of a sufficient volume of kinetic energy? Like, for example, falling from a high place…?" Seidou blinked in bewilderment of the eager teen's longwinded question but quickly recovered as he thought back on the many biology lessons he sat through as a student at the academy.
He cleared his throat and let out a contemplative hum. "Well, in some cases, a ghoul can actually heal from those types of injuries. It's largely dependent on a ghoul's regenerative abilities, which is different for each ghoul." He crossed his arms over his chest and looked up at the ceiling as the cogs in his mind continued turning. "They become more vulnerable the longer they go without eating, and ingesting human food also makes them weaker, which can hinder their regenerative ability. Ghouls that are already weak are more susceptible to injuries from man-made objects, and any drastic trauma can prove fatal if they can't heal from it quickly enough." Yuuhi scribbled on her notepad as he spoke.
She paused to squint at the notes she had taken. "So the weaker they are, the more susceptible to damage," she summarized, to which Seidou nodded. "And any kind of massive trauma is capable of killing them because they cannot recover quickly enough."
Seidou smiled, "that's right."
Yuuhi stood to her feet, satisfied with the information she had been given. She put away her notes and shrugged her bag over her shoulder. "Thanks! I think I get it now," she said, reaching over to give the brunette an appreciative handshake. She looked back to her sister who was doing nothing to hide her boredom with the conversation. "I should be getting back to the academy now. I'll speak to you later oneesan." She gave a quick wave before turning to exit the cafeteria with a new pep to her step.
Haruhi looked back to Seidou with a wan smile. "Yuu takes her studies very seriously, but she refuses to accept my help," she explained. "I appreciate you answering her questions. You seem very knowledgeable."
"Oh, thank you. It was no problem at all," he said as he cautiously took the seat across from her, folding his hands in front of him on the table. Haruhi smiled reassuringly in an effort to ease his nerves, though she's unsure why she seemed to care so much. More often than not, she preferred her colleagues feel intimidated by her; having people avoid her made life easier for everyone. To her, making small, meaningless conversation served no practical purpose and only managed to distract her and cut into valuable time she could be allocating toward something more important.
Yet here she was, letting the anxious greenhorn sit with her when she should be getting back to work. "Why doesn't she let you help her?" he asked.
Haruhi shrugged. "I'm not sure," she said, "maybe we have a rivalry that I'm unaware of."
Seidou scratched his chin, a rueful smile on his face. "I guess it would be a bit difficult to follow after a sibling as talented as you," he praised. "It's like you're stuck in their shadow, and nothing you could possibly do would ever measure up." Haruhi was a bit caught off guard by his explanation, her heart clenching in her chest at the thought of her sister feeling as though she wasn't good enough, immeasurably resentful toward her for making it all seem so much easier than it truly was. If that were the case, it was surely never her intention.
Seidou had escaped within his own thoughts, brooding silently across from her. Somehow she knew he could relate to Yuuhi's situation. "Do you have siblings, Takizawa-san?" He snapped back to reality at her question and nodded his head.
"A younger sister," he sighed with a roll of his eyes that brought an amused smile to the raven-haired woman's face.
"So you can relate?" He shrugged his shoulders. The expression on his face was unreadable as he seemed to retreat back into his head.
After a moment, he spoke with a solemnness Haruhi had never heard from him. "Yeah," he finally admitted, eyes falling to the table. "You could say that." She smiled sympathetically.
"My father used to say that competition 'builds character'." Seidou met the apathetic woman's eyes as she spoke. "I think that's garbage. If anything, it reveals a person's character. What drives them and what they are and aren't willing to sacrifice to achieve their goals. You can learn a lot about someone from competing with them, you can reveal a lot about yourself. But it doesn't make you a better person.
"When you really think about it, it's all rather pointless."
Seidou stared intensely into the foggy blue depths of her eyes as if they held the answers to all the questions he had. She absentmindedly picked at the cuticles on her fingernails as she stared across the room at nothing in particular. What could she possibly know about competition? Seidou had always thought of the intimidating young woman as someone whose skills had never truly been challenged, so infinitely talented that few could compare. She was well on her way to becoming one of the most revered female investigators that the CCG had ever seen. From her perspective, Seidou figured it was awfully easy to say such things. "Pointless?" he wondered, to which the corners of her mouth quirked upwards in the faintest hint of a smile.
Her gaze shifted back to the bemused young man with firm resolution. "Why does it matter if somebody surpasses you if you were always doing your very best?"
Seidou frowned deeply. Your best is the best; how comforting, he thought sardonically. He had heard the same false proverb from his mother and his instructors, all patronizing him for his failures. It seemed like he was always falling short of his infuriatingly perfect classmate. None of them understood his frustration, the demoralization he felt each and every time she finished above him or won their unspoken challenges. "No offense, but that's easy for somebody like you to say," he stated, resting his chin in his hand with a dispirited expression. "I bet you've never been anything but the best."
The sulky young man was surprised when she let out a laugh, a hand moving to her lips as if to catch the noise before it escaped her throat. Seidou found himself captivated by the harsh woman's smile as if he were watching a shooting star streak across a black sky, a beautifully fleeting moment that he was unsure he would ever again have the privilege of witnessing. Had he done that? Did he really make her laugh? Before he could compose himself she assured him, "I'm not sure why everyone seems to believe they know me so well, but I can promise you that's not true." A delicate smile curving her lips as she once again turned her attention toward the window, her piercing grey-blue eyes fogged by something Seidou couldn't decipher.
He was so confident that he understood her. He had heard stories all throughout his academy days of the incredible young investigator feared by men and ghouls alike – Kamenashi Haruhi, the Angel of Death, harbinger of ruin. When ghouls saw the petite figure wielding the quinque bathed in flames, all hope was abandoned, resolve smothered in a white-hot inferno. The stony mask she wore so well never seemed to falter, and she wore the same constant look of placid resignation even as she cut down the ghouls that opposed her. Despite being so well aware of the young woman's reputation, Seidou couldn't help but feel suffocated by the overwhelming sense of superiority that emanated from her presence, and the dull impassiveness that dwelled in her eyes sent a chill down his spine.
"I'm not sure why everyone seems to believe they know me so well," he thought back on her words and wanted to kick himself. What a fool he was for assuming so much of her, he chided himself. But he was so sure that he understood her, and now he wondered if he really did at all. As he stared at her painfully gentle smile, he thought about how fragile she looked and how beautiful she was despite her ruthless reputation. Her eyes betrayed her true feelings as complex as they were despite her efforts to hide behind a cold, unfeeling mask.
Seidou hadn't realized that they had lapsed into silence until Haruhi finally spoke again, the weight of her words coming down on him like a ton of bricks tossed from a tenth story window.
"If being the best is all that you're aiming for," she said, her voice returning to its usual somber tone as her gaze met his, unwavering and frigid, smile gone from her face, "you'll never amount to anything." He wasn't sure how to respond, a lump forming in the back of his throat as she stared at him with casual indifference. It was like a switch had been flipped just when it seemed as though she were giving him a glimpse past her harsh exterior, and she was suddenly back to the careful and guarded ghoul investigator, the unwavering professional. He felt like a bug under a microscope, like his greatest flaws laid exposed before him for the mysterious woman to pick and prod as she pleased. He was captivated by her, and at the same time, stricken with fear of her judgement, afraid that she could see what nobody else seemed to notice.
Seidou quickly realized that she wasn't waiting for a response, instead gathering her things and standing from her seat. "It's been nice talking with you, Takizawa-san," she said, bowing appreciatively much to his surprise. "But it's time for me to get back to work." He felt his mouth go dry as she turned to walk away.
"I-I'm right behind you!" he sputtered, silently cursing the anxiety he felt under the woman's attention. She smiled over her shoulder.
