RANDOM CHALLENGE OF DOOM
"Happy Rebirth Day"
Chapter 2
Tarkin strained at trying to figure out how to drop Luke Skywalker's name to Vader without leaving any trace of where the information came from. He knew he had to figure out a way and soon, the Emperor was not a patient man and he pushed him about as far as he wanted to the last time he'd talked to him. The next time he'd have to be before him and Tarkin didn't like the idea of being hit with Force lightening.
Pushing aside a spilled bottle of asprins on his desk he activated a hidden switch opening a hidden draw. Once fully opened it revealed a holocube. Taking it out of the draw he walked around his desk, and placed it on the floor. After getting it just where he wanted it he activated it, and an image of the Emperor appeared with a smile from ear to ear, his hands placed on his hips like he was some type of hero.
Returning to his desk he pulled the draw further out this time revealing several stones of varying sizes. Picking up the largest first he threw it at the image of the Emperor. Though it passed right through the image if it had been real it would have hit him right in the forehead.
"YESSSS!" Tarkin screamed seeing where the stone had hit, "Take that you sawed off little Coleac.
He repeated the move several more times, feeling a little relief each time he hit his mark. Retrieving the stones he paused in front of the holocube looking at the Emperor, he reached up slapping his face then poked him in the eyes. Happy that he took a break but still stressed that he hadn't figured out how to do what the Emperor tasked him with. He put the cube and stones back in their little hiding spot, then sat back in his seat to further ponder the problem he faced.
Several different ideas had come to mind but all ended in leaving some kind of trace back to him, or the Emperor. Still frustrated from before it had built up again having to continue thinking of a way, plus the fact that he always had to do the Emperors dirty work. Putting the prank on hold he decided to take a walk around the command deck.
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Luke sat in his quarters aboard the Millennium Falcon, he, Han, and Chewie were asked to check out a suspicious transmission emanating from and area in space that didn't have any planets but did have a substantial asteroid field. Having taken the first shift in the cockpit he was taking a break before heading back.
Having never thanked Han for saving his life when the first Death star was destroyed, he wanted to do something special for him. So whenever he had the chance, and no one was looking he had hidden in his quarters a cross-stitching kit. Not wanting to have it be like every other one on the market he had changed his just a little, normally it read: 'HOME SWEET HOME'. But he altered this one to read: HAN & CHEWIE'S HOME SWEET HOME. Figuring the he could hang it in the common area of the ship to add a little touch of home, seeing that Han and Chewie spent most of their time here.
He'd just put the finishing touches to the panel when Han chimed him over the intercom.
"Hey kid, we're a little hungry up here how about a couple of sandwiches and a drink?"
Sliding the cross-stitch under his bed he answered.
"Anything special or just throw whatever's if the cooling unit between to slices of bread."
About a minute passed, when Han answered, well as long as your taking orders how about two orders of Brot-Rib sautéed with mushrooms, and maybe a couple of side orders of…" Luke figured he was pausing to ask Chewy, then came back saying, "Yeah a couple of orders of Gumes, I know they go with Nerf steak but they taste just as good with Brot-Rib."
"Is that all?" Luke asked getting annoyed knowing full that none of that stuff was located anywhere near this ship least of all stored in the cooling unit.
"No, two slices of Citros Snow Cake, should do it… oh and a bottle of your best house wine." Han finished.
"Coming right up," Luke replied going along.
Going to the galley Luke threw together what ever was in the cooling unit, which wasn't much between to slices of bread, grabbed a couple of Corellian Ales and headed to the cockpit. Standing at the door he said in a slightly raised voice startling Han and Chewie.
"WHO, got the Brot-Rib special?"
Both Han and Chewie turned quickly then relaxed slightly when they saw it was Luke. Luke who was playing innocent asked with a smirk.
"Who'd you think would be coming up here to bring you dinner, Jabba?"
"Funny kid next time warn us before you do that," Chewie who returned to monitoring his panel when he saw it was Luke voiced his opinion of Luke's prank.
"No worse than you two ordering stuff that wouldn't be caught anywhere near this ship unless you crashed into a freighter full of it." Luke replied.
"Why always with the cracks about my ship… sure she's old, 'sorry about that baby' " he said patting her console, "but she's never let you down when you really needed her, yeah her hyperdrive system had a few bugs here and there, but between her and I you're still alive." Han said all defensive.
Luke was about to rebuke Han's statement went the ship's alert system went off telling them that they had reached their destination.
"Strap in kid, I'm gonna revert back to real space, and it may get a little bumpy," Han ordered.
Luke knowing the dangers of not being strap in when a ship reverted from hyperspace jumped in the passenger seat behind Han and did as was requested. Chewie watched and waited until Luke gave him a nod signaling that he was strapped, and good to go. Chewie hit the switch to the hyperdrive and what was not visible during hyperspace travel be came visible in the form of millions upon millions of stars, not mention one very large asteroid belt.
"Where suppose to find the starting point of a transmission they're not even sure came from here, in all of that?" Han asked astonished.
"That's the idea, Boss," Chewie answered.
"Hey kid, you got any Force tricks that can help us with this…ah… job?"
"I'm good but not that good." Luke answered.
"Chewie you got any ideas?" Han asked now scratching his head.
"That transmission could have bee bouncing around in that mess for years." Luke commented.
"Chewie send a transmission to the Alliance, and ask them if there sure it emanated from here," turning to Luke he said, "I hope they made a mistake, cause if it did we ain't go home anytime soon that's for sure." Han guessed.
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Emperor Palpatine was in his most favorite part of the Imperial Palace, a room his most beloved followers had commissioned special works of art just about him. Though the Emperor himself commissioned most of the works contained here he still liked coming to look at… himself.
"My don't I look wonderful today," he said stopping at the largest of the sculptures, "It's like the eyes follow you where ever you go."
His royal guards making faces beneath their masks, commented softly 'yeah and that's not the only thing that follows you around'. Emperor Palpatine turned abruptly looking first at one guard then the other, giving them an evil stare. Almost like he had heard what they said he waited a few seconds then turned his attention back to himself.
"Oooo look at the big bad Emperor, watch out or he'll toast you like Bonta bread."
Again the Emperor turned abruptly hearing something but unable to make out what was said. Walking over to the two guards he stopped in front of them with his hands on his hips he glared at them saying.
"You have comments my servents?"
"No my Emperor we were just commenting on how life like the statue is… and… that if you were standing on a pedestal you couldn't tell which was the real you, there almost as life like as you… my emperor."
Looking at them funny his eye brow raised thinking whether or not to believe them he waved his hand and went back to admiring his works of art. Relieved as the Emperor walked away the guards chuckled with one whispering.
'Almost as life like as you, you're messing around to much if he were smarter we'd both be Bonta toast.'
'Nah,' the other whispered back, 'when he's in here he's way to into himself to notice anything.'
Emperor Palpatine walked around the hall and stopped in front of the newest addition to his collection a statue of him kissing a baby, screaming for the guards, he was not happy with the alteration someone had done to the statue.
Someone had placed a diaper on the baby with one side of it coming loose and its contents spilling down the Emperors dress uniform.
"Who would dare such an awful thing, to disgrace such a work of art with baby poodoo, I want this perpetrator found spare no expense."
He said, as he began to clean the statue, then stopped smelling his fingers.
"Aaaaa it's real poodoo, oh quick give me some wipes get me to a refresher, I've been violated," he screamed running around with his dirty hand held high.
The guards unable to move, for fear that if they got any closer to the Emperor they would burst out laughing and surely die, not by the Emperors hand but from the laughter alone. Calling for more help as difficult as it was; a squad of royal guards came crashing through he door thinking that the Emperor was being assassinated. Taking defensive positions about the hall one inept guard fired his blaster towards the Emperor thinking he was a mad man running around with his hand in the air. Missing the Emperor completely the bolt from his blaster hit the statue of him and the baby shattering it into hundreds of tiny pieces.
Stopping dead in his tracks Emperor Palpatine looked as pieces of his statue rained down on top of him.
"My statue!" Who is responsible for this outrage, tell me, tell me now," he said as he picked up some of the pieces.
Turning he looked at the guards and again demanded to know who had shot his statue. With out saying a word the six guards pointed to the one holding the smoking blaster who in turned reluctantly and very slowly raised his hand.
"You will stay here and pick up every piece of this statue and I don't care how you do it, I want my statue put back together, do you hear, and no missing pieces either." The Emperor said as he stormed out of the hall, again holding his dirty hand in the air.
