We're gonna get this party started with a request from my accomplice, anonymousauthor406, in which teenage Tugger is feeling a little insecure about his blooming sexuality. I hope you enjoy! Here comes Tuggoffelees:


"Wait, you're gay?"

"No, I'm not gay!"

"But you just said-"

Tugger sighed heavily, "I know what I said."

Mistoffelees' immediate reaction to finding out that The Rum Tum Tugger was attracted to another tom was excitement, but it quickly faded to an awful feeling in his chest. So he had a crush on Tugger. Whatever. Tugger went into puberty when he was, like, seven and turned into the most obnoxiously gorgeous fourteen-year-old known to catkind. Every young queen and at least two young toms (Spoiler alert: It was Mistoffelees and Plato) in the tribe wanted a piece of that. It was just a little different for Mistoffelees, because Tugger was his best friend. He had always been able to deal with his feelings because Tugger was straight. There was no way they would ever be together, but Mistoffelees knew it had nothing to do with him. Sure, he didn't like it, but he could deal with it. Then, he found out that Tugger had a crush…and it was on a tom. And it wasn't him. And his world just kind of collapsed. His tender young emotions just couldn't handle it.

Hold it together, Mistoffelees.

"You okay, bro?" Tugger asked, looking sideways at his best friend. "You look kinda…"

"Allergies."

"Oh."

"Yeah, and I need to go get my medication, like, right now."

Mistoffelees took off in a full sprint towards the den he shared with his sister. In one smooth motion, he ran straight through the purple curtain that served as their door, pulling it down, dropping onto his side, rolling himself up into a curtain burrito, and sobbing on the floor.

"That was impressive."

Mistoffelees recognized Electra's voice. He sighed, his voice muffled by the curtain, "Victoria, you didn't tell me you were going to have friends over."

Victoria, who was sitting on her nest with Electra, folded her arms across her chest. "You didn't tell me you were going to have an emotional breakdown. What's the matter?"

"Tugger likes toms. Well…a tom, anyway."

"Isn't that a good thing?"

"No!" Mistoffelees wailed. "Now, I can't pretend the fact that he doesn't like me has nothing to do with me!"

As Mistoffelees cried into his purple velour tortilla, Electra leaned over to Victoria. She whispered, "Is he on his period?" Victoria just rolled her eyes.

"Go away, Misto. We have our own tom problems to deal with."

Suddenly, Electra ears perked up. "Wait, I have an idea! What if we give him a makeover, to get Tugger to notice him?"

Mistoffelees dramatically sighed, "Tugger wouldn't notice me, unless I, like, covered myself in glitter and performed magic tricks."

"Then there's only one thing for you to do!" Victoria laughed. "Cover yourself in glitter and perform magic tricks!"

"That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard."

"Do you want Tugger to notice you or not?"

"…Fine. Just call me 'Magical Mr. Mistoffelees.'"


After Mistoffelees ran off, Tugger didn't know what to do. He'd been so nervous to tell him…well, it didn't matter now what he was going to tell him. Simply the possibility sent the tuxedo cat running for his "allergy medication," as if Tugger hadn't known him his whole life. Mistoffelees didn't have allergies; he was upset. Why was he upset?

Fighting back "allergies" of his own, Tugger quietly walked back to his family's den. He didn't cry; he was The Rum Tum Tugger. No one made him cry. No one broke his heart. Not even his darling best friend who he grew up with and did everything with and thought hung the moon and loved more than anyone and anything else in the universe.

Oh, who was he kidding? He was devastated. He didn't just love Mistoffelees, he was in love with him. In fact, Mistoffelees was the first and only cat he'd ever really loved, like that. Sure, he'd had his share of queenfriends, even by his age, but that wasn't love. That was boredom and hormones. Mistoffelees was different. They were soulmates. Well, at least, that's what Tugger thought, before Mistoffelees took off running into the sunset. Maybe he shouldn't have sprung it on him, like that. I mean, it's not like he was exactly subtle. "Hey, gay tom who is my best friend, I am gay. Guess who for?" Yeah. Super coy. Of course, Mistoffelees got freaked out. It was too soon. Mistoffelees was only thirteen, after all, and not everyone could be as experienced as Tugger was, by that age. What was he thinking? What was he going to do? What if Mistoffelees didn't want to be friends, anymore? Or worse, what if he did?

"What's the matter, son?"

Tugger looked up. He'd been so lost in his thoughts, he didn't even realize he had moped right into his den, where his father was waiting. "Nothing."

"Now, I know that's a lie, little boy."

"I'm not little!"

Old Deuteronomy chuckled, "Of course you're not, anymore, but you'll always be my little boy." He patted the spot next to him, and Tugger reluctantly sat there. "Now, tell me what happened, Tugger. I haven't seen you cry since your mother passed…"

"I'm not crying!" Tugger sniffed.

"Sure, you're not. I'm sure you're just having allergies. I can always take you to Jenny or Jelly and have them fix you up with some-"

"No! Fine. You're right. I'm crying."

"Then why are you crying?"

Tugger stood and nervously walked away from his father, shaking a bit, just trying to put one foot in front of the other. Could he really tell his father that he was in love with a tom? What would he think?

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Now, Tugger, you know you can tell me anything. I'm your father."

Tugger took a deep breath and reluctantly turned to face Old Deuteronomy, again. "I think…" he began. "No, I don't think. I know, but- I-" He burst into tears, startling his father. "Dad, I'm gay."

There, he had said it. He hid his face in his hands, not wanting to see his father's reaction. He felt like such a disappointment. How were his father and brothers going to look at him, now? What would they say? What would everyone say?

"Well, it's about time, Tugger. Thank the Everlasting Cat."

Tugger looked up, bewildered. "You- you knew?"

Old Deuteronomy laughed. "What do you mean, 'I knew?' Of course, I knew. I'm your father, little boy. I knew from the moment you and Misto laid eyes on each other."

"Dad, I was one."

"Yes, son: The gayest one-year-old I've ever seen."

Tugger sighed, feeling his eyes stinging. Oh no, he was not going to cry, again.

Actually, yes, he was.

"I tried to tell Mistoffelees, and he just freaked out and ran off."

"You told him you have feelings for him?"

"Well, no, just that I have feelings for…a tom."

Old Deuteronomy smiled, standing up and approaching his son. "You should tell him," he suggested. "Trust me, little boy. I've known how you felt about him for thirteen years, and I know how he's felt about you for that long."

Tugger shook his head, suddenly terrified at the prospect of confessing his feelings to his best friend. "No," he said firmly. "What if you're wrong?"

"But, little boy-" Old Deuteronomy placed a hand on his son's shoulder. "-what if I'm right?"


Tugger took a deep breath. This was it. He could do this. He was just going to stand up, walk right over to Mistoffelees' den, barge in like he always did, tell his best friend that he was in love with him, and they would live happily ever after, right? Of course, right.

The universe had other ideas.

Tugger practically jumped out of his fur, when Mistoffelees suddenly appeared and sat down in front of him with an incomplete, mismatched, dirty deck of cards, obviously scavenged from the junk. "Pick a card," Mistoffelees demanded.

Tugger nervously pointed to the King of Hearts, and Mistoffelees began to shuffle the deck. "Look, Misto, there's something I actually wanted to talk to you about," Tugger said, the butterflies in his stomach feeling more like pterodactyls every second.

"Can't," Mistoffelees replied curtly. "Doing magic."

"Actually, it's kind of important."

"Magic, Tugger!"

Mistoffelees looked incredibly flustered, shuffling the dirty cards to and fro. Tugger couldn't help but notice how disgustingly adorable he looked, when he was flustered.

Get it together, Tugger. Now is not the time to get distracted by his adorable face, or funny expressions, or shiny black fur, or deep, dark eyes…

"Okay, I'm finished," Mistoffelees said, finally reorganizing his cards. "Now-"

"I'm in love with you."

Both young toms froze, staring at each other, each with an expression of complete horror on their face. Tugger, feeling his heart sink, was the first to snap out of it. "Misto?"

Silence.

"Misto, say something."

But nothing. Misto just kept staring back at him with those big, dark eyes, looking completely freaked out.

"Mistoffelees, for the love of the Everlasting Cat, say something!" Tugger finally shouted, reaching out and shaking his best friend's shoulders.

Mistoffelees gulped. "Is this your card?"

"…Well, I never."