And so the confession comes out!
The walk over to Stan's house after school was quiet. Unusually so, and Kyle noticed.
"Hey man, you've been real quiet all day. Is something wrong?" He asked, worried.
"No…" Stan lied. "I'm just thinking about something important."
Kyle saw through the lie, but decided not to press the matter. "Is it that thing you were going to tell me?"
"Yeah." Stan watched his feet trudge along through the snow down the street, nervousness was curling in his stomach. What if he completely rejects me? What if he says that he can't stand the sight of me and doesn't want to be friends anymore? What if… Stan's mind was full of what ifs.
Kyle's mind however what just full of whats. What is he going to tell me that is so important? What could make him like this that's so bad? I wonder if it's about Wendy. God I hate that bitch. Kyle had always pretended to like Wendy for Stan's sake, but in reality he thought Stan deserved so much better. Someone who actually loved him, not his dick. And that's pretty much why Wendy had kept him around. On one occasion, when Wendy had been telling everyone that she couldn't get Stan stiff, Kyle had actually almost hit her! Rage pooled in his chest at the way she had treated him, but cooled off when Stan's house came into view.
Stan turned the corner and started walking up the path to his house when the butterflies suddenly got much more violent. It was like they had a war going on in there. He gulped and walked in the front door silently, only to be greeted by his obnoxious father on the couch.
Randy had been watching Obama's speech about why he should be reelected for a third term even though it wasn't allowed. Everyone complained about him so much, how had he even gotten a second term in the first place? None the less Randy cheered him on for the sake of popularity.
"Hey Stan! You and Kyle wanna come watch this with me?" He asked excitedly and wearing his Obama tee-shirt from the first election.
"No thanks dad, we're going to hang out in my room." Stan said dragging Kyle up the stairs, almost making him trip. Stan traced his thumb over the back of Kyle's wrist unnoticeably before letting go. He walked into his room and it no longer seemed like such a good idea to tell Kyle. The butterflies weren't at war anymore; it felt as though a snake was in his stomach now. He took a deep breath and fell on the end of his bed face first. The mattress sagged as Kyle sat down next to him. Kyle took off his hat and ran a hand trough his messy red curls. He had started cutting them shorter recently and they looked much cuter that way.
Stan turned his face to the side to look at Kyle. His face was expressionless compared to the turmoil inside him. A sigh passed over his lips and he sat up slowly. His hands were folded in his lap and he looked at them intently. Kyle thought he looked somewhat like a child who had been caught stealing a cookie from the cookies jar.
"So what did you need to tell me, Stan?" He asked.
The moment of truth had come. It was now or never. Stan looked into his best friends eyes and spoke.
"I love you Kyle." It was barely a whisper.
"I love you too, man." He said back with a smile.
"No Kyle…" Stan tried to explain. "I'm in love with you. I've been in love with you for years."
Kyle stared at him blankly. He blinked then opened his mouth to speak, before closing it again. Looking away from Stan's face to favor a gaze towards the carpet he contemplated what he had just heard.
Stan watched his best friend patiently, although the agony of anticipation was killing him slowly. He hates me, I just know it. Kyle doesn't want anything to do with me. I should have just kept my mouth shut this was a such a bad idea. He- Stan's thoughts were abruptly cut off when Kyle spoke.
""I-Stan. I don't know. I mean, we've been friends forever…" Kyle mumbled slowly. "How long?" He demanded louder.
"I told you, years." Stan bit his lips. He could feel Kyle's rejection welling up.
"How many years?" He demanded again.
"Since fourth grade." He saw Kyle's brow furrow as he did the math.
"Eight years? You've been in love with me for eight years and you're just telling me now?" Kyle sounded hurt and Stan looked up shocked. He nodded slowly. It had been eight painful years of wanting Kyle and he had just told him.
"Why did you wait so long?" Kyle asked suddenly grabbing his shoulders.
Stan caved to the touch. "I was scared you'd reject me, that you wouldn't want to be friends anymore." Stan confided.
Kyle shook his head. "This sounds really cheesy, but Stan, I would never not be your friend. Nothing would ever be enough to make me not want you as my friend."
"But that's all you'll ever be…" Stan said looking away from Kyle's piercing eyes. Kyle felt the urge to pull Stan's chin back up so he was looking at him again. He didn't want Stan to look away. He put his hand on Stan's jaw and roughly pulled it up so that Stan was looking at him.
"I don't know yet. I mean… I've never been in a relationship before…" Kyle hesitated. He didn't even know if he was gay or not. "I just… I'll need some time to think Stan."
Stan nodded. His heart had leaped at the contact Kyle had started. He wanted more than just that one rough touch…
"Can I give you something to maybe help you decide?" Stan asked softly. Kyle just watched him.
Stan placed his hand on Kyle's cheek gently, like he was touching a flower. Leaning forward he parted his lips and pressed them to Kyle's. His eyes slipped closed and he moved his hand from the other boy's face to the back of his neck. Kyle gasped lightly when Stan ran his hand through the auburn locks. Stan reacted by pressing his lips more forcefully on Kyle's.
"Stanley…" Kyle whispered against his lips.
Before they both knew it, the kiss was over. Stan had pulled away. Kyle swallowed and stood up. His head was a mess from what had just occurred. Oh my god, did I just almost moan his name? This is my best friend! …My best friend who just confessed that he's been in love with me for years and kissed me…
"I-I'll call you or something later. Okay?" He asked nervously.
Stan nodded. Kyle turned away and walked out of Stan's room. When he was halfway down the stairs Randy noticed him.
"Hey Kyle. Where are you going? Where's Stan?" He asked.
"Ike called, he needed something, so I have to go. Stan's in his room playing videogames." Kyle lied quickly.
"Okay, we'll see you later then!" Stan's father turned his attention back to the TV.
Kyle nodded and hurried out the door and down the street to his house, just two houses away from Stan's.
Meanwhile Stan lay down on his bed, head falling onto the spot where Kyle had been sitting. The feeling of dread became overwhelming. He shouldn't have kissed Kyle, but he couldn't help himself. His thoughts turned to the way he had heard Kyle say his name, whisper it the way he had dreamed of. He didn't mean it… Stan brooded. He'll call me later and tell me he just wants to be friends, nothing more. Well at least he didn't laugh, he wasn't disgusted… He said we would still be friends no matter what… The raven haired boy tried to comfort himself as the tears broke loose and he sobbed himself into a dreamless sleep.
Awww KYLE! Why'd you have to leave him all aloooone. Poor Stan. :(
