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Onset
Open my eyes.
Something isn't right. Something about this day feels strange, and I haven't even tackled it yet. I sigh, and ignore the voice calling out to me.
Groggy. Vision blurred.
For a second, I can't even remember my own name.
"Sora."
It all suddenly washes over me. Why today is so significant, I mean.
Today is the day we begin building the raft.
"Sora, did you just come out here to sleep? We have work to do."
It feels like an end to this chapter of our life.
"That's a pretty 'half-empty' way of looking at things, Sora."
What do you mean?
"Instead of looking at it as an end to this chapter, you could kinda look at it as the beginning of something new."
You have an interesting way of looking at things, Kairi.
"You're just as lazy as he is," Riku says.
"I'm the girl," you say, "it's up to you guys to do the work."
"Whatever. Sora, I'm gonna need you to gather some more supplies. We need some rope, a couple more logs and some cloth for a mast. Can you handle that?"
Yeah, I think I got it.
"What about me?" You ask.
"You're the girl, remember? Try to stand close to me and look pretty."
They laugh, but I can't help but feel the sting of jealousy.
I try to laugh, too, but they just stare at me. I guess they could tell it was fake.
I'll just, uh, go find the shit.
Tidus is swinging that stick around all by himself.
I approach, and ask him how it's going.
"This island can get so boring sometimes. You up for a match?"
Sure. Why not?
I draw my wooden sword, and he counts down from three.
Just as soon as the count hits one, the distance between us closes. Side of the wooden sword connects with his leg, and he's forced to kneel. His staff meets my stomach, knocking the wind out of me. Tumble backwards, onto my back. Struggling to breathe, he advances.
"You had enough, yet?"
He steps closer, and my foot sweeps his out from under him, knocking him totally off balance. Roll over onto my stomach and push myself up onto my feet. Quick turn, and he's charging me again. Sidestep and connect the end of my weapon with his neck.
He falls, gasping and coughing.
Are you okay?
"Weak, dude," he rasps out. "Fucking weak."
I'm sorry..
He said something about splinters in his neck, and I pretend to feel bad. But that kind of shit happens when you challenge someone to a fight.
I just picked up the rope at his feet and threw it over my arm.
Found a log on the beach. The cloth was hanging on the wall up in a treehouse nobody ever seems to visit.
Bring the supplies I've gathered back to Riku, who's in his usual place. Most people go through the shack to walk along the pier out to his solitary patch of land that he generally practices on.
I set the shit down next to a log that's already there.
"That everything?"
Yeah.
"You up for a match before we go get Kairi?"
I dunno about that. Got into one with Tidus and hurt him. Now he's all pissed off at me. Something about splinters in his neck.
"You won't hurt me, Sora."
Don't be too sure. Splinters. Neck. You.
"You won't be able to get to my neck."
Cocky. Maybe I'll take you up on that. Put you in your place.
I'm cut off by his fist burying itself into my stomach. Sucker punch. Cheap. Forehead meets his mouth, hard. He spits blood and I draw. Wooden sword connects with his side, and his body tilts. Foot meets his chest, he goes flying back. Arches legs, launches himself into me from the ground. Feet connect with my chest. Gravity is not my friend, at all. Takes me off the ledge and for a second I feel nothing as I freefall backwards into the water.
Fuck.
Hey, Kairi.
"Sora."
You smile at me. Like you always do.
My heart melts. Like it always does.
Riku's about done putting together the raft. He's waiting for us over there. You should join me.
She pauses for a moment, biting her lip. Her eyes avert from me to the sand at her feet. Back to me.
"Sora?"
Yeah?
"Can I talk to you about something?"
Sure. What's up?
"Have you noticed anything strange about Riku lately?"
Strange? What do you mean?
"Like, the way he's been acting. He seems.. different."
I stop and consider things for a moment. Perhaps I haven't been paying close enough attention. Trying to finger a moment in time where I may have noticed some odd behavior. Can't seem to. That isn't to say she's wrong.
I'm not sure, I say. I don't feel like I've really been all here, if you know what I mean.
"Yeah. I dunno. I think he's changing, and I don't know if I like it."
"That's one to zero!" he says, smiling through his bleeding lips.
My clothes are soaked. It's hard to stand.
I don't respond.
"You should go get Kairi, while I finish the raft up."
Yeah, I'll see what I can do.
It's okay, Kairi. He's probably just going through a phase, or something.
"Don't ever change, okay?"
Heh. I'll try not to.
In our secret place, I feel an emptiness and fulfillment all at once.
In our secret place, I live through the present while reliving the past.
In our secret place, I await the courage to approach you once again.
Why it's always so hard is beyond me.
Tell me about the place you grew up.
"I've told you, Sora. I don't remember."
You've got to remember something.
"Nothing."
Nothing at all? It's just a blank?
"Nothing at all. It's just a blank."
I'd like to see it, someday.
"Me, too," Riku chimes in. "Along with any other worlds that might be out there."
"Do you think we'll make it?"
"We have to."
But, just how far could a raft take us? Isn't the outcome of this a little uncertain?
"You're too negative sometimes, Sora," Riku says, winking at me. "We'll make it."
I guess you're right.
"Are you guys ready?"
I don't know, I say. I really don't.
In this cave behind the waterfall.
Our secret place.
The drawings of chalk we made for each other oh so many years ago. Fading with time.
You'd draw something for me. I'd draw something for you.
You'd draw me. I'd draw you.
I turn to leave this place.
Something stops me. Can't be explained, but I turn, and there he is.
Long brown robe, face obscured in the dark shadow under the hood.
"Connection," he says. "This world is no different than the others."
I'm speechless. Stare at him, heart pounding. Eyes wide.
"Our fates are tied, Sora." His deep voice echoes off these cave walls.
How do you know my name? Who are you?
"In due time, child."
You're from another world, aren't you? How did you get here?
He doesn't answer.
A noise behind me.
Look back.
Double take, and the person is gone.
I should get some sleep.
"Wanna race, Sora?"
You're on.
"The star and back. Count of three."
Right.
Three.
Two.
One.
Go.
Feet pounding against the wooden path beneath me.
He knows something I don't, and leaps. Step onto the weak spot of the pier and it collapses.
I fall to the rocks below.
Three coconuts.
Three fish.
Three mushrooms.
One seagull egg.
One bottle of drinking water.
In hindsight, we weren't as prepared as we should have been.
Wake up to the sound of thunder.
My thoughts immediately turn to the raft.
Fuck.
Jump out of bed, throw my clothes on as quickly as possible.
Quickly open my window and hop out.
"That's 2 to 0, Sora."
Fuck you, I manage to say, coughing up saltwater. That was a cheap victory.
"Don't be a sore loser, man, it was just a race."
Step out onto the shore of the island. Heavy rain pelting down on top of me. Thunder booming in the distance. Lightning cutting through the darkness at random. Strobe light effect.
Make my way across the beach and jump onto the roof of the shack, taking a shortcut to the pier that leads to Riku's practice area.
He stands out there, alone in the distance.
Closing in, I call out to him. He looks at me and smiles.
Where's Kairi?
"Isn't she with you?"
He's staring at me very oddly, biting his lip.
Stepping forward, closing in on me, he grabs me.
What are you doing, Riku?
His face approaches mine. Our lips meet. For a second, I'm too shocked to react.
Tongue slipping between my lips.
I push him back.
What the fuck, Riku?
He looks hurt.
I feel bad. Confused.
"Don't you want me?"
I...
He turns away from me and sits on the grass.
A moment of silence, during which neither of us have anything to say.
I want to tell him it's alright, but I don't really know how.
I want to tell him that I
"Just go get Kairi. You know what you want. I can't help that."
Rushing through the waterfall, I'm not even looking for you.
I need to escape.
But to my surprise, I find you here. Waiting for me.
"Sora," you speak in an unnaturally monotone voice.
Kairi!
You don't seem right to me.
Like, something isn't right.
I don't know what to make of it.
Advance.
You come flying at me, as if you were levitating.
Open my arms to catch you, but you fly right through me, and you're gone.
I emerge from the waterfall, searching for you.
Wet hair gets in the way of vision. Right hand sweeps my bangs out the way of my eyes.
Scan my surroundings.
Flash of lightening. Shadows creeping along the ground with nothing casting them.
My heart is caught in my throat. Pounding.
Shadows rise from the ground.
Things go dark again. I'm frozen. Hand grips hilt of wooden sword. No idea what else to do.
Another flash. Shadows advancing. Darkness. Yellow eyes cut through, piercing my very soul.
Draw.
I start madly swinging. It has no effect.
They keep coming, and I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do, so I just bolt past them.
Riku's gone.
I have to make my way to the raft on my own.
I can't wait for you any longer.
I have to push off now.
Pushing the raft off of the sand, straining. I walk it through the water against the harsh rain. Hop aboard, and I'm adrift, waiting for whatever's to come.
The rain dies down, eventually.
I cling to the mast as if it were a buoy. A safety net.
The storm calms.
I begin to drift.
Before too long, the island is gone,
and I am completely alone.
When I awake, you are there.
Both of you.
You've been waiting for me.
I want to tell you that I'm sorry, I want to tell you that I know I fucked up and there isn't much that can be done about that, and there isn't shit that can be done to make up for it, but you're here now, you're here now, so it's okay. I love you, I love both of you and I need you.
But my throat won't let the words escape.
I just break down and start crying as both of you shake your heads in disappointment.
I'm sorry, I say.
But you don't respond.
Are you hungry?
I look around for the food bag, but it isn't here. Maybe I forgot to pack it.
Want to cry again, but have nothing left.
Please, say something. Say anything. I need you, I need both of you. Please don't do this to me, I'm sorry, I'm so fucking sorry.
You both wordlessly smile and slightly nod your heads. As if everything were going to be okay.
But it won't. I know that it won't.
You speak to me, Riku.
But your voice is not your own.
"You hold the key, Sora." It's his. The man from the cave. The man in the shadows. "Use it wisely."
Your corpses begin to rot in the hot summer sun.
I'm constantly on the lookout for a sign of land.
For another world.
The next chapter.
Is this the beginning... or the end?
