In the absence of logic, continued…Chapter 2

Josh headed to the bathroom, going over various scientific &mathematical equations in his mind to keep his thoughts away from what he didn't want to remember.

When he reached it he opened the door and went inside, closed the door behind himself, locked it and sat on the toilet seat, with his boxers still on.

Josh put his head down between his open hands and sighed. He pushed more equations into his brain but couldn't help but think of the dream.

The quiet that surrounded him, fueling this momentary lapse of judgment.

A sudden feeling came over him then, as his thoughts slowed to one image.

This image was what he saw just before he woke up.

For a millisecond without considering what he was thinking

he thought,

~why do i always wake up from good dreams~

He laughed for a moment and then stopped abruptly, moving his hands through his hair,

which made him think of how Drake's hands would feel if they were to do the same.

~Stop it!

This is wrong, i can't...I won't think of him that way~

Josh thought, pushing the feeling that had come over him before down once more.

He didn't fully recognize what the feeling had been until his hands had moved from his head to his unexposed chest and then lower, and lower

but before they could reach the destination they'd been heading

Josh pulled his hands down away from each other, on opposite sides of himself.

Pressing his fingers hard against the cold porcelain toilet he was sitting on.

~Have you lost your freaking mind? stop it!

don't even think about it~

he thought, mumbling

"e=mc²"

over and over.

Someone knocked on the door then.

"Hey who's in there?

I have to use the bathroom."

Josh didn't pay attention, only repeated the equation in his mind.

"HELLO? who's in there, i have to use it."

someone said, slight irritation in their voice.

Josh ignored the voice again and mumbled the equation a loud once more.

"Hey!

I'm going to break the freaking door down if you don't answer me,

i gotta use it!"

Josh finally recognized the voice as Drake's and immediately got up.

He walked towards the door, unlocked it and pushed past a now angry Drake

saying nonchalantly

"It's all yours"

as he walked back into their room and closed the door behind himself,

banging his head lightly against the closed hard surface of the door.

Drake opened the door on the outside, hitting Josh's head as he came inside.

Josh slowed his thoughts to the equation and said calmly

"I thought you had to use it."

Drake scowled

"Well I can't use it now!

I'm too mad."

Josh smirked

"What are you mad for?

Just go to the bathroom, if you have to go."

Drake ignored him and said

"Why didn't you answer me when I asked you if anyone was in there?

You were in there for so long, I know you heard me!"

Josh sighed rubbing his hands over his eyes.

"I'm not gonna argue with you Drake,

just use the bathroom

or don't use the bathroom

and leave me alone."

Josh said walking to his bed and sitting down.

Drake went over to him angrier then before

"What's your problem Josh?

You're acting weirder then usual ."

Josh exhaled mumbling the equation under his breath again, not paying attention to Drake.

"Hey! I'm talking to you

Why do you keep ignoring me?"

Drake said shoving Josh's shoulder.

Josh felt slight pain near his shoulder but ignored it and thought of the equation, attempting to drown out Drake's voice.

"What the heck is wrong with you Josh?

Listen to me!"

Drake said shoving Josh's shoulder harder.

Josh stood up then forgetting the equation, inches away from Drake's tensed body.

He closed his eyes, ignoring the words Drake was saying

But focused on the way Drake's voice sounded when angry and how fast his breathing became as his anger grew.

Drake shoved him again, harder than before.

"Josh!

Have you lost it or something?

What's your problem?"

Josh opened his eyes and stared at Drake then.

He focused on the grimace Drake's face now held and walked closer to him.

Drake stepped back slightly confused and still yelled various things Josh wasn't paying attention to, it was as if Drake were on mute.

Josh stepped forward again, as Drake stepped back

and this continued for awhile until Drake reached the closed bedroom door.

The back of his feet hitting the lower portion of it.

Josh stepped forward enclosing the space between them and looked at Drake,

Thinking

~I think I've officially lost my mind~

as Drake said

"Josh!

You're freaking insane, whats the matter with you? Get out of the way!"

Josh leaned forward slightly nearing his mouth to Drake's

as the back of Drake's head bumped against the door

and just as Josh could feel Drake's heavy breathing against his lips,

the door burst open, pushing Drake and Josh quickly to the ground.

"What's with all the racket?

I could hear you guys yelling from down stairs!"

Drake's mom said, irritation in her voice as she eyed them on the floor.

They were entangled by the fall but quickly moved away from each other

and Josh said

"It's fine…Everything's fine.

We were just…messing around,

Right Drake?"

Drake gazed at Josh with a look Josh couldn't place, then stood up and said to his mom

"Yeah Mom,

We were just messin around."

Drake's mom scowled and looked at the both of them.

"Next time, keep it down boys."

She said rolling her eyes, and exited their room.

As soon as the door closed, silence followed suit.

But soon Josh looked at Drake

and Drake looked at Josh and said

"Josh what,

was that?"

Josh looked towards the floor, fumbling with his fingers and said

"I don't know."

Drake's eyebrows furrowed in confusion

"What do you mean you don't know?"

he said, his voice raised and then remembering his mother

said it once more quietly.

Josh looked up into Drake's eyes finally

And replied

"I mean….I don't know."