I've lost you: Chapter 2
A/N: I know I've kind of been MIA for an incredibly long time but I'm back because this fic calls to me and I'm still touched that some of you think it's a story worth continuing so I'm making this into a multi-chaptered fic. I don't know how long it's going to stretch but I hope not long. I also won't be making anymore promises on when I'll update but when I do, I'll be ready with two chapters to go out. This is the second chapter and since I've got the third chapter done, I'll put it up next week on Sunday. I hope you guys enjoy! -Rach
Disclaimer: I don't own Glee
Hunter sits on the edge of his bed, sheets strewn and hair array. His eyes, tired and puffy as if he had been crying recently and his hands were quivering as he rolls a bottle filled with a white substance in his open palms, acting like he was contemplating if he should take some.
He snaps out of his own mind when the door to his dorm room slowly creaks open.
"Hey," a voice whispers, smiling slightly, "how are you doing buddy?"
Hunter looks up to his roommate who was holding a glass of water, and manages a weak smile, "I could do better. Thanks." Hunter replies. Taking the glass into his hands as he placed down the bottle he was holding previously on the floor.
Instead of drinking the water, Hunter stares blankly at the liquid as he swirls it around in its container.
"Uhm, are you going to that press conference next Saturday?" his roommate questions in an attempt to ease away at the tension.
"Hmm?" Hunter says, looking away from his water.
"The press conference. On Saturday." His roommate repeats, sitting down and causing the bed to dip.
"Oh yeah. I don't think I should go." Hunter winces as he looks up at his friend, "I'm—not feeling- good. So that…that wouldn't be a good move."
"Alright Hunter, whatever makes you feel better." Hesitantly his roommate gives him an awkward pat on the back as he slowly gets up from the bed, "I have to go meet Rain now."
"Yeah, alright." Hunter sighs as he takes some hesitant sips of water.
His roommate nods towards him and escapes through the door, shooting him a pitying glance which doesn't go unnoticed by Hunter.
Running a frustrated hand through his hair, Hunter barely keeps in a scream. He's seen people shooting him confused and sympathetic looks right through the week and it made him even angrier that he knew that they have no idea what for. But it was better to keep it that way than let everyone know why the reason he was so frustrated was because of a boy, of all people. Yes, no one really needed to know about Sebastian.
But everything has changed, Sebastian wasn't his secret, he wasn't his anything more. And Hunter thinks that's what hurts the most. It stings to know that Sebastian was supposed to go right back being nothing but a teammate.
Hunter looks at the syringe tucked away behind the towering piles of books, and bites his lip before making his way towards it. He needs something to tuck his mind away. For now.
Sebastian sighs as he watches the paper airplane he throws, glide through the air, and makes its safe landing in Nick's tousled brown hair.
"Will you stop?" Nick huffs out, yanking the paper airplane out and spinning away from his laptop where the bleeping cursor stopped at 873 words.
"I have a stupid 5 page essay due tomorrow on freaking vegetables and your creative skills focusing on the art of flying origami is not helping!" Nick glares at Sebastian who looks up to look at him indifferently before falling back on his pillow with a groan.
"Fine, I'm sorry." Sebastian says quietly and shuts his eyes.
Nick considers momentarily, going back to his browser with probably 13 tabs open right now, but in bitter resign, walks out of his chair and sits down on Sebastian's bed instead.
"Alright, what's wrong? Why are you like this?"
"It's nothing, it's nothing. Just stupid issues I have to sort out myself." Sebastian says, rubbing his hands together and refusing to look at Nick. His friend looks back and cringes as he sees the mess of his friend. Honestly, Nick has no idea what the hell was going on with Sebastian but he hasn't ever seen him in some weird crossover between really pissed off and melancholic before in their 9 years of friendship.
"Look, whatever you're dealing with, I am shit with helping friends out." Nick says.
"Gee, thanks for trying." Sebastian rolls his eyes and huffs.
"Yeah okay, fine I'm not the best. But I'll tell you something that'll make you feel better. I was hanging out with Jeff, yeah. And we were watching this like thing he likes to watch and there was this one guy who said 'Behind a start there's a start and behind that, there's another start'."
"So you're basically telling me that I should move on?" Sebastian whispers.
"No…" Nick frowns, "I'm telling you to get over yourself because you're kinda lame and to just run the goddamn race."
Nick's face gets hit by a pillow and he just gives up helping Sebastian.
It's sort of been three weeks of stress and annoyance but no matter how hard Sebastian tries to feel better, he just feels like forgetting the whole mess just growing in his mind. He hasn't seen much of Hunter these past few days and there were times he feels so alone because he misses him so much but also relief that he wouldn't have to keep on seeing guilt. It really does wear him down after a while. He just hopes Hunter is getting better without him being there to help him all the time.
"The food is a bit on the sloppy side today." Sebastian sighs, settling into his seat in the middle of the cafeteria.
"Excuse you, this is like the food of my people." Jun Hee sends a scathing look at Sebastian as he starts stuffing dumplings in his mouth.
"I don't like Chinese food okay." Sebastian pokes at his dumpling and Jeff nudges him.
"You feeling better? You've been kind of out of it this week."
Sebastian smiles, "I'm fine. I'll be fine."
"Alright," Jeff pulls in a breath before sipping some water, "Aside from that, we finally got a spot as an opening act for this really cool concert."
"I'm guessing it's a concert for like, drunken teenagers." Wes mutters.
"It's still a concert and it's making money. We're in a band, Wes. A shitty band. We need the money if we want to buy afternoon snacks to watch your crappy movie collection." Wes laughs mockingly and motions to throw him a beanstalk.
"Point taken," Jun Hee nods, "Is it going to be just us again, or is Hunter actually coming this time?"
Wes looks over at Sebastian for an answer, "Is he?"
Sebastian shakes his head, "I don't know to be honest. I-Uh, really haven't spoken to him much."
"His roommate says he's hitting a record low. Who knows what he's actually doing cooped up in his room like that." David points his fork around everyone.
Sebastian grips the plastic chair beneath him. He knows what they were all implying but it really isn't a subject to make light of. David nudges Sebastian softly, "Hey, I didn't mean it to sound offensive."
"No, I get you," Sebastian flashes a quick smile, "Hunter's just busy nowadays. Probably."
Jun Hee shrugs and looks back at this food tray, "Well then, we got to start thinking of either writing new songs or just doing covers like we did last time."
"I was thinking covers because the last time we made a new song, courtesy of the ever reliable Jeff, apparently, just copy pasted lyrics from other songs and added Korean words last minute. So really, unless you want us to mock every Korean in that room with your god-awful pronunciation, I would suggest-"
Sebastian turns away from the table just in time to miss Jeff reaching over to strangle Nick and instead watches dust gather on the window ledge beside him. Soon enough winter would be approaching and he hopes to any almighty that it'll stop Hunter from going out to buy drugs and waste his life away. But then again, knowing him, he'll probably find a way to go around it.
It kind of depresses him to know that Hunter, who's usually very determined and hardheaded in what he wanted, would just leave him like that. Not even try to text him or nothing. Maybe the first day he texted like what, 6 times? But that was it, not a sound and not a rumor floating around. Just Hunter sitting in his room doing whatever he does with himself.
Maybe Sebastian wasn't even worth it in the first place. He was probably just some weird experimentation Hunter wanted to try out and fucking hell, it hurt. He was angry that it hurt and he already tried too long and too hard not to ever get hurt. Not anymore. Hunter has his stupid Hollywood side of life and he was just some scandal tucked away.
"Yeah! Yeah, remember the duck-"
Sebastian slams the table only loud enough for the circle of friends around him to hear and for Jun Hee to stop talking. He lifts his head up and begins drinking his carton of milk angrily. They all stare at him in alarm and Sebastian just stares back until he's forced to look down and try his best not to cry in front of them.
