Checkpoint: 1, Loads: 0

Nothing else happened for a while. I didn't reach any checkpoints. I had no reason to load back. All I had been doing was listening to people around me and thinking.

I should've known before I came into this world. It was no different from my own. The lives of these people were just as important as those in my old world. And my own was no more important than anyone else's. In fact, it was objectively less important considering the fact that I couldn't die.

My hands were already bloodied. I had no excuses. I knew exactly what I was doing when I created that story. But I had to listen to the last messages my… mother had wanted to pass on.

She wanted me to be happy more than anything else. She wanted me to explore my interests, to find people I could trust. So I would do that. I had originally planned on staying out of the way of most of the threats I was aware of, but now… now I wanted to do something about it all.

I could prevent so many unnecessary deaths, and I could load back and try things as many times as necessary.

The first thing I could think of was the Uchiha Massacre. I could always spend loop after loop training, but I didn't want to mess up the storyline too much. It might be better to try to subtly influence Itachi to not follow the orders to murder his entire clan.

I could befriend Sasuke, and through him, Itachi and Shisui. It'd be difficult, but I had plenty of tries. If worst comes to worst, I would still have the option to train till I could stop Itachi myself.

Now that I thought about it, I should befriend Naruto as well. I wondered if he was in the orphanage. I guess I'd find out soon. There was a good chance that he had a caretaker while he was younger, and once he reached a certain age, he was given his own apartment. Maybe once I graduated I'd get a place of my own as well?

Next came the fact that Root might come for me if I showed too much potential. The way I had designed my story might have made me ideal for that…. I started to regret it slightly.

I'd just have to be careful to hide any progress I made when it came to training before the Academy. Regardless, I would always be able to load back if I got caught.

And if I prevented the Uchiha Massacre, wouldn't that mean Orochimaru would have no reason to hunt Sasuke? And the existence of the Uchiha clan could prove a deterrent to any potential invasion.

I realized something. I could let myself become part of Root, reach a high-ranking position, and then assassinate Danzo. That would prevent the massacre altogether. It'd be dangerous. But I could do it. I was in the unique position to infiltrate Root and prevent many of the disasters I knew might come to pass.

Whatever the case, I had time to decide. The only short-term goals I had were learning Japanese and, if possible, meeting Naruto. And that meant I had a few years to wait before anything really happened.

The time I had already spent with nothing but my thoughts had made me realize something else. I missed my old life. I missed my family and friends. Nearly every moment where I wasn't concentrating a certain idea or problem was filled with thoughts of the past. I had been okay with dying… but I hadn't realized that a second life where I would never again see my loved ones would be torture of the highest caliber.

...The voice had told me… I could move on if I wanted. And I assumed if I died of natural causes here, I'd pass on then as well. And, well… there were only two possibilities:

1. I would meet with my friends and family again in some kind of afterlife.

or

2. I would never see them again. Either I'd cease existence, or I'd go on some other kind of adventure.

The point I was trying to make to myself was that, if the former were true, I should live this life to its fullest. If the latter were the case, then I'd have to do my best to live the way they would have wanted me to. Regardless, spending time feeling sorry for myself wouldn't change anything.

It didn't make it hurt any less. The hole in my heart still ached like the bullet had pierced more than just my flesh.


Surprisingly, two years seemed to pass like a blur. It must've been the way my brain worked because I was a child. I wondered what my brain looked like, considering I had these adult thoughts but my mental development was still that of a toddler.

I learned to understand basic Japanese fairly quickly as a result of my own concentration combined with the developmental advantage I had as a baby. I assumed I could speak it as well, but I didn't want to alarm my caretakers by doing so too early.

I had watched many of the older kids and toddlers my age around the orphanage, but I never saw anyone with blond hair and whisker marks. I wasn't that surprised.

I missed so many parts of my old life, but a few things stuck out more than others. I missed the internet, where I could find comfort anytime I felt lost or even just bored. I missed music especially. Listening to music had been one of the greatest joys of my life, and I'd never hear the same songs ag-

I realized right then. I could do it myself. Sure, I'd have to design and craft a guitar, but if I found some talented people, it could be done. I wasn't all that great a guitar player, but I knew enough that, with hard work and practice, I could bring back bits of my past life. From then on, I spent some time each day thinking of songs I wanted to recreate.

On my first birthday, I reached a new checkpoint. I was relieved because if anything happened, I didn't want to have to load back and live through another year of boredom. There was only so much I could take. It also made me wonder if, until something major happened, every birthday would be a checkpoint.

I decided then that, because I could now load back to a closer time, I would start trying to unlock my chakra. It wouldn't hurt to have a head start.

It was unfortunate that I didn't recall exactly how it was done in the anime or manga. Something about looking inside yourself and feeling it out. Pretty much the same as any pseudo-spiritual energy I'd heard about in my old world.

Still, I'd have to take it seriously now. I waited till night fell and each of us were put in our own beds, then I sat up and concentrated.

This wasn't my old life. Chakra existed here. An energy that I knew I had. I put my hands near my stomach and felt for something, anything that didn't fit. It couldn't be too hard, right?


It took me most of the year. It was now that I realized how useful the "Motivated" ability was. My past self wouldn't have been able to work so hard so consistently for something that didn't provide immediate gratification. I spent every night in the darkness, imagining the blue substance that had to be somewhere in me, reaching for it with all my strength.

When that didn't work, I meditated. When everyone else went to sleep, I closed my eyes and tried to concentrate on everything and nothing at the same time. I tried to look into myself, but look into everything around me as well.

It wasn't easy. It was a month before anything happened besides my falling asleep.

However, almost two months after I started meditating, I managed to feel something. It was almost like a second sight, like an overlay that didn't interfere with my normal view at all. It was exactly like a sixth sense. I could… see, for lack of a better word, the chakra inside of me.

It wasn't long before I realized that I didn't need to reach for it. I had to control it from inside, pulling from the middle like loosening a knot. When I finally tugged free my chakra, it flooded my body like an icy shower.

I almost jumped in celebration, but remembered myself in time. For a while, I had thought it may be an exercise in futility - I couldn't remember most ninja unlocking their chakra before the age of two.

Checkpoint Reached!

The words, appearing beneath my eyelids for the third time of my life, made me jerk back in shock.

My eyes snapped open, and I looked around nervously. I wondered if any of the caretakers were ninja in disguise, like the woman who took in Kabuto. If so, they could have sensed me unlocking my chakra.

And the thing was, there was no way for me to take it back now. I never thought actions I took or milestones I reached could cause a checkpoint. That meant I could theoretically choose when I wanted a checkpoint, to an extent.

I could already guess that I would reach one when I started the Academy and also when I graduated. That seemed almost certain. There could also be one after the Uchiha Massacre, and if I joined Root, one then. In that case, I couldn't just pretend I was invincible. If I was taken into Root and couldn't load back to any time before doing so, it might pose a problem.

But those were issues for the future. Right now, I was content to watch the chakra flowing through my coils and attempt to control it.


I still used a couple hours each night meditating and moving my chakra around. I theorized that it could speed the development of my coils and increase my control. I also wondered at the possibility of developing a sort of chakra sense. I didn't do anything too extreme, but I eventually started trying to stick things to me, mostly with my hands. I'd pick up a block and apply chakra, loosening my grip slightly as I did so. After lots of practice, I could keep it in my hand without using any physical force.

Months passed. I saw people come and go, usually nothing special. I didn't recognize anyone. Some of the kids were adopted, but it didn't happen too often.

There was a single bookshelf in the orphanage. I assumed they didn't expect anyone to read the whole selection. I knew the earliest I could start teaching myself to read without suspicion would be around three. That'd work out as well, since I could load back once I reached that birthday's checkpoint.

For now though, I was stuck staring at the covers with interest, paging through picture books, and listening to the caretakers read aloud to us.

One day, during the time when I and some of the other kids around my age were allowed to play in a big pen with toys, we were told to be quiet because some important people were coming. Shinobi, they called them. I wondered what they were doing here.

We watched in curiosity as a trio of what were obviously ninja walked past us, toward where the older kids stayed. They each wore a green flak jacket, what I knew as the sign of a chuunin or jounin. I assumed chuunin because they appeared to be teenagers. The two guys glanced over at us in disinterest, though I could've sworn they stared at me longer than anyone else.

The girl smiled and gave us a wave. I waved back a little, almost involuntarily. I saw her eyes brighten when she noticed. I wondered if she would've said something had the two with her not gotten her attention again. After they left the room, I realized the girl was Yuuhi Kurenai. The two guys were Sarutobi Asuma and a shinobi I had seen before but never learned the name of.

When they left the orphanage and passed by us again, I noticed all three were acting somewhat strange. Kurenai looked over at us again, but with noticeably less cheer. This time, she looked me in the eyes and gave a sad smile and wave. I returned the favor once again, smiling as well.

I wondered if my smile made her feel any better. I hoped so. Something in my heart clenched as I looked at those three. They were only teenagers, yet they must've taken several lives by that point. To live with that so young… I didn't want to imagine it. And then I remembered, I would soon join them. And as a killer, I already had.

It was a while before my mood cleared enough to listen to the older kids talking excitedly.

"A ninja! Doesn't it sound so awesome!" one of the boys yelled. Taichi, I think his name was. He was always the most energetic of his group.

"I just wanna be like those two guys, they were so cool," said another boy with dark hair and eyes.

"Well, you heard 'em, right? We just gotta join the Academy next year!" Taichi spoke up again. Each of the boys nodded in agreement.

I saw one of the girls smile wistfully, like she was remembering someone. Then she balled up her fist and grit her jaw, making a silent declaration to herself.

I wondered if she was thinking of Kurenai, if she had just made a vow to become like her, a shinobi… a killer.

I thought I realized why those three were acting strange. They were dealing with the pain and guilt of condemning another generation to violent bloodshed and suffering.

I remembered the woman who had given birth to me in this world. And I remembered what I had once thought jokingly, and shook my head in rueful shame.

I will bring peace to this world. No matter what it takes.


With power comes responsibility. But it's difficult to feel like you have power when your best ability is mostly useless and your chakra control consists of a technique akin to the leaf-sticking exercise.

By now, I was attempting the tree-walking exercise, but I couldn't really do it to any useful extent. I would stick myself to the bed, mostly.

Eventually, I began doing it bit-by-bit in the bathroom where no one else could see me. I would lie down, push my feet against the wall, and apply chakra. I'd take a step or two before I began to slip.

There was no place private enough for me to practice with chakra, even outside. I didn't want to risk a sensor finding me, either. For now, I was stuck living the life of a three-year-old orphan.