All right. Here we go. I now present to you: chapter two! I received complaints about bringing Chris into the story from Java and Sophie. I've already convinced them there is no need to panic, but I wanted to extend that message to the rest of you. Seriously, I detest Lorelai and Chris together. He will play an extremely minor part in this story. Basically, he's only here to escort Rory. Please don't stop reading because you hate Chris. Remember that I hate Chris as well. There will be very little affection!
As always, my reviewers need to be thanked: Kassandra27, ShaolinQueen, EvilSmirk6, Java, imcck, Good2Know, Sophie, Curley-Q, JESSandRORYforever, Jeremy Shane, Sailor-Lit, QuEEnSeRb716, and blonde.biatch. Thanks a bunch! You all know how much I love reviews. : )
Disclaimer: Oh, here it is...the lovely disclaimer. I own absolutely nothing. I don't own Gilmore Girls, Sonata Arctica's song "In Black and White", or the ideas and conversations from "Presenting Lorelai Gilmore."
"I can't believe you got Jess to cave!" Lorelai gushed.
"Oh, well. You know how Jess is. We bartered. Although, that was after I knocked him into the ice cream for the third time. Before then, all I owed him was a new pair of jeans without vanilla in the pocket." Rory pondered for a moment. "Now I need to read five Hemingway novels of his choice."
"Read? That is such an easy deal for you!" Lorelai exclaimed. "Where is Luke? We need coffee. I have been dealing with Emily Gilmore all morning. This is a coffee morning."
"It's Hemingway, mom," Rory reminded her.
"Right. LUKE!" Lorelai shouted.
"The coffee will come." Rory took the pamphlet from her pocket. "I'm supposed to let Jess know what to wear. Do you think I'll need to let him down lightly?"
"Let's see." Lorelai grabbed the brochure from Rory and began scanning the section. "Aha! Here we go."
"I think Jess will look great in a tux. I've never seen him dressed up before," Rory said as she waited for Lorelai to announce the dress code.
"Tails."
"What?" Rory asked.
"Hey, what's up?" Jess sauntered over with a pot of coffee.
"Oh, my hero! Coffee, coffee, coffee! This is such a coffee morning." Lorelai thrust the cup out. "We're just discussing the dress code."
"No, you were just about to tell me the dress code," Rory corrected as Jess finished pouring both Gilmores their coffee.
"Huh."
"You don't have a tux, do you?" Rory asked.
"When would I need a tux?" Jess laughed and went behind the counter to put the coffee on the burner.
"I don't know. You escort women, don't you?" Rory took a sip of coffee.
Jess sat next to Rory and stole her coffee briefly. "Well, now I do."
"So, a tux."
"Tails," Lorelai repeated after scanning the entire pamphlet for the second time.
"What?" Jess asked.
Thoughtfully, Lorelai drank some coffee before continuing. "Yeah, according to this, it says all escorts must be properly attired in black tails, white cummerbunds, and white gloves."
"What?" Jess asked again. He groaned. What had he gotten himself into? Sure, it was for Rory. Rory was his best friend. Nevertheless, the tails, cummerbunds, and gloves made him think twice.
"I'm sure the gloves are optional," Rory piped up before Jess or Lorelai could get a word in.
Lorelai shook her head and handed Rory the pamphlet. "Nope. Not according to this."
Rory scanned the section her mother had pointed to and passed the pamphlet down to Jess. Jess examined the same passage and groaned. "Tails? Gloves?" he asked as he tossed the pamphlet on the table.
"Please remember that I'm your best friend. You love me; I'll buy you ice cream…"
"And read Hemingway," Jess smirked.
"And read Hemingway," Rory repeated slowly and softly.
Lorelai's cell phone began to ring. "I bet you a dollar this is Emily Gilmore." She proceeded to dig through her purse until she retrieved the ringing object.
"Grandma's been calling all day," Rory explained to Jess. Jess nodded. He knew when Emily and Lorelai were concerned, there was arguing right around the corner.
"Hello, mother." Lorelai smirked in Rory's direction. "No, Rory does not need a gentleman caller." Rory looked over at Jess briefly. "Uh, because she has an escort already."
"I don't think Grandma knew you were going to escort me," Rory said blankly to Jess. Once again, he stole her coffee and took a sip.
"Well, who do you think?" Lorelai asked.
"Yeah, she definitely doesn't know." Rory went to drink her coffee, only to discover the cup was empty. "More, please."
Jess groaned and went to pour Rory a second cup of coffee. When he returned a moment later, Lorelai was still on the phone with Emily.
"No, she really does have an escort," Lorelai paused briefly. "Again, who do you think?"
"Does she know yet?" Jess asked as he sat back down.
Rory shook her head.
"Jess."
"Okay, now she knows." Rory took a large sip from the coffee and placed it on the table.
Lorelai sighed. "Yes, mom…the horrible hoodlum boy that pushed Rory down the stairs when she was nine."
"Your mom was right, this is a coffee morning." Jess stole the cup from Rory's hands as she picked it up.
"Hey! Get your own!" she retorted, stealing the cup back.
"No, mom. Jess has grown out of pushing innocent girls down the stairs." Lorelai rolled her eyes and motioned with her hand that Emily was talking so much, she could barely get a word in. "Yes, I know there's a giant staircase." Lorelai drank the remainder of her own coffee and thrust the cup back at Jess for a refill. "No, Jess will not push Rory down the giant staircase." Lorelai pounded on the table to catch Jess's attention. He shot her a look and grabbed her cup off the table. "What noise?" She snapped her fingers for Jess to hurry up. "Oh, that noise. Yeah, that was Rory falling down the stairs. Jess pushed her."
Rory started giggling and had to leave the table. Jess handed Lorelai her coffee and backed away slowly.
"That's what you call a joke," Lorelai said. "No, mom. It is not crude. You just don't get humor." Lorelai smacked her forehead and slumped in the chair. "I can't talk to you anymore!" Frantically, Lorelai flipped her phone shut and set it to silent.
Jess stood wordlessly waiting for Rory to return from wherever she had disappeared to. He smiled nervously as Lorelai looked at him.
"So, kid. Tails."
Jess nodded. "Tails."
Rory and Jess sat on the yoga mats in Miss Patty's sipping to go cups filled with coffee. They were taking a break from "dancing" at her insistence.
"When's your dad supposed to show up?" Jess asked, knowing it was a touchy subject for Rory to discuss.
"Today," she said.
"If he isn't coming…" Jess started.
"He'll come," Rory promised as she drained the remainder of coffee from the paper cup.
"Ready?" Miss Patty asked.
"Ready as we'll ever be," Rory said as Jess helped her off the mats.
Jess walked Rory to the center of the floor and they positioned themselves. Miss Patty chewed her lips as they began to dance.
"Okay, now keep counting in your head. Look each other in the eye. Good. Jess, honey, are you leading?"
Jess raised his eyebrow. How exactly should he know if he were leading? "I have no idea," he sputtered. He attempted to spin Rory, which resulted in her stepping on his foot.
"Okay, okay! Stop, stop, stop!" Miss Patty raised her voice and the two friends turned their attention to the dance instructor. "Now, remember, one of the most important things in ballroom dancing is to remember to spot, otherwise you're going to get dizzy."
Rory nodded in agreement and looked up at Jess sheepishly. She had definitely already gotten dizzy a few times during the lesson. Although he had held his own, Rory had been tripping over both her feet and his.
"So, what you want to do is you want to pick out something to focus on," Miss Patty continued. "I usually like to find a lonely seaman. Then when turning, whip your head around and find your spot again." Miss Patty demonstrated by spinning. "Hello Sailor. Hello Sailor. Hello Sailor." She completed her spins and stood very straight and, according to Rory, very balanced.
Jess let his mouth fall open. "You have to be kidding me."
Rory punched her friend playfully. "Although it would probably liven things up, I think you can do it without the "hello sailor" part."
"Rory…" Jess whined. He sounded pathetic, but at that moment, he didn't care too much.
"Please Jess? Remember Hemingway?" she pleaded.
He growled. "I change my mind. Seven," he said.
Rory groaned as well, but it would be worth it to read Hemingway. At least with Jess as her partner, she would not be stuck with one of Emily Gilmore's 'Gentlemen Callers'."
"Okay, now take it from the top," Miss Patty instructed. She flipped on the music and the pair started to stumble through the dance.
They were halfway through the dance when Rory heard a noise at the doorway.
"Hey, you guys are really improving. Now you're actually facing each other!" she sipped her coffee gleefully and reveled in their inability to dance.
"Anyone need a break?" Chris piped up from behind Lorelai.
"Dad!" Rory deserted Jess and dashed over to hug her father. "I told you he was coming!" she said to Jess.
"Okay, take another five. Don't sit down this time. Your muscles will get cold," Miss Patty instructed. She excused herself for another much-needed smoke.
"So, how's it going?" Lorelai asked gently.
Rory scuffed her sneaker on the shiny floor. "Actually, I'm not very good."
"Yeah, which is really holding me back because I'm a natural," Jess shot back with his own answer before Lorelai could insult him.
"I've stepped on his feet more times than I can count," Rory mentioned. "Miss Patty actually thought I was going to seriously hurt Jess at one point." She laughed nervously.
"It's not your fault. Ballroom dancing is a wonderfully sexist thing. Any woman can do it; she just needs a strong male lead." Chris noticed Jess was scowling. "No offense Jess," he added halfheartedly.
Jess grumbled something that Rory could not make out. Nevertheless, she pinched him anyway, leaving him to rub his neck after her fingers left the nape.
They stood back for a moment as Chris pulled Lorelai toward him. Almost immediately, she stumbled. "My mistake. Almost any woman can do it." He grinned playfully at Lorelai.
She pouted and stomped her heel on the floor. "I wasn't ready! I want a do-over!" she demanded.
"Fine," Chris said reluctantly. "May I have this dance?"
Lorelai took Christopher's hand. "I don't know. Do you have a trust fund?" She glanced over at Rory and Jess, who were laughing on the sidelines. "Always make sure!"
As Rory's parents began to dance, Rory and Jess watched patiently. Rory was certain she would never be able to spin with such grace. On the other hand, if her mother could spin that gracefully, it was possible she could as well. Lorelai was not exactly what one would dub graceful. "Okay! I'm adopted!" Rory shouted as Lorelai spun back into Christopher's arms.
Jess shook his head. He wasn't exactly coordinated either. This whole dancing thing was not particularly up his alley. "Yeah, I'm never going to be able to do that," he said gruffly.
"Don't worry. We'll practice!" Miss Patty said.
"Great, I'm looking forward to it," Jess sighed. He attempted to smile and then attempted to pull Rory closer to him. Instinctively, she stumbled. "Like mother, like daughter," he said softly.
"Jess!" she exclaimed.
Chris and Lorelai excused themselves from the dance studio. "Thanks for showing up," Lorelai said.
"It was worth it just to see the show those two put on back there."
"They're great aren't they?" Lorelai asked as she sipped her coffee.
"A little off balance, but sure. They're great."
Lorelai turned her head toward the dance studio.
"OW! RORY! THAT WAS MY FOOT!"
