I have been bad today, because I woke up at seven am and I had to wake up at six thirty to make breakfast. It doesn't happen often, but I don't get much sleep because I can only get out of the hot bath at midnight and if I go out before or after I get hanged by my wrists in the basement without my feet touching the ground for the whole night. So sometimes, I can't wake up. I want to, because I don't want to be bad, but my eyes are too tired.

My eyes are still tired, but I can't let them close because otherwise I will get shouted at and the bad man will come. I don't like when the bad man comes, because he always makes my body hurt, and bleed at my bottom. Auntie Beru is preparing my medicine over the sink. I don't like the medicine either because it tastes funny, and I always get scared because my Auntie always wears gloves when she prepares it. One day she didn't find them and she got medicine on her hand and it hurted her. She said it was burning her, and now her hand has a mark on it. It hurts my body inside too. I wonder if I got marks like her.

My eyes close. I feel my Auntie's hand on my leg, and she pulls so hard I fall on the floor with the chair. My legs and hands hurt but I have to get up quickly or she will get more mad and call for the bad man. She forces a spoon inside my mouth. "Swallow !" she says. I try to, but I can't, and she pushes me on the floor. I swallow just before my head hits the stone floor and I shout because my head hurts. I am scared, because I am not allowed to shout. She starts kicking me everywhere. My tummy hurts, and the medicine gets on the floor. "You disgusting FREAK !" my Auntie shouts. "LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE !" She pulls me by the hair and puts my head in the sickness. My cousin cries and soon my Uncle appears in the kitchen with him in his arms. My Auntie tells him what I have done and shows him the floor, and he gets all red in the face. He drops my cousin on the floor and tells him to get all his friends here as soon as possible. Then he comes and starts kicking me too. Soon my cousin and his friends join in. My Uncle tells them to hurt me more and more and more. He says it's good. Says I deserve it.

I hurt a lot, everywhere. I am scared because there is a lot of my blood on the floor. I want to cry but I can't because I am not allowed. To not let my eyes cry I bite my lower lip, and more blood comes out. I cry, because I don't want to bleed, even though I'm used to it. My Uncle leans in, pinches my ear with his fingernails and shouts in it: "EVIL BOYS DON'T HAVE THE RIGHT TO CRY, BECAUSE THEY ARE MOTHERFUCKERS WHO DESERVE TO DIE !" Everyone agrees, because he is right. I'm a fucking evil boy and I deserve to die.