"Gintoki!" A woman's voice invaded into my dream. "Hey! Gintoki stop pretending you are asleep!"
I woke up after hearing such familiar voice; I could recognize the owner of this voice because Gintoki always hears it every now and then.
I snuck my head out of my room(temp)/ kennel, located in my lawn, in order to deliver the punchline as this old woman say…
"Gintoki! Where's this month's rent?"
"THIS IS NOT EVEN YOUR HOUSE, GRANNY!"
Day after The Storm
It was yesterday when those people from Gintama started to appear in this world. I still couldn't believe this and my friends are oblivious to all of these crazy stuffs.
(Even though some of them are suffering from them.)
I placed my hand at my chest and pray for the safety of Hidenori and Karasawa.
I entered my class, Class 2A, and it seems like most of the students are here already. Therefore the other students should beware of getting late.
While thinking about that, my body moves automatically over to my desk as I think about those boring stuff. My desk was located next to my bad friends so my mouth moved on its own to greet Hidenori (who is on my left) and Yoshitake (a desk in front of Hidenori).
"Sup, guys. How's it going?" Both of them were still facing the front when I greeted them. It seems like something serious came up.
"Yo~ Tadakuni. It's good to see you on time." The muscular Hidenori turned and greeted me with his usual deep voice…
Wait…
"Who the heck are you!?" I jumped up from my seat after seeing a man, who looks like a pro body builder, sitting on Hidenori's seat.
"What are you talking about, Tadakuni. It's me." The man stood up and pointed his thumb towards himself. "I'm Jack."
"NO, WHO ARE YOU! I DON'T KNOW ANYONE CALLED "JACK"! Wait, you are Hidenori!" I immediately came to that conclusion after realizing that Hidenori likes the name Jack for some reason.
"Tsk! Ya, you got it right."
"Why are you disappointed? And since when did you get this built? The Hidenori I know wasn't like this."
"Heh. How naïve, Tadakuni." Hidenori stood up on top of his chair and made an expression of being impressive. "I spent most of my yesterday training!"
"WHAT? It's impossible to gain so much muscle in one day!"
Hidenori then gave me a smirk, "Haven't you heard that "it takes 3 days for a man to grow out of his boot"."
"NO, I DON'T THINK I'VE EVER HEARD OF IT AND IT'S NOT EVEN THE SECOND DAY OF YOUR TRAINING!"
"Hmph. Too naïve, Tadakuni." The muscular Yoshitake stood on his desk making an impressive-like look on his face.
"Wait! Even you have gained muscle! What's going on? And why do you two have to stand on something to look impressive?"
"I, too, have gone through intensive training yesterday…" Yoshitake clenched his fist and there are some tears flowing out his eyes to show how hard the training was, "in the toilet."
"WHAT SORT OF TRAINING COULD YOU HAVE DONE IN THE TOILET!? AND WHAT, YOU WERE STILL IN THE TOILET AFTER YOU WENT HOME?"
"Huh? Tadakuni, haven't you heard that "It takes 3 days for a man to grow out of his toilet seat"."
"I DEFINITELY NEVER HEARD OF THAT!" I was shouting on top of my lungs in order to beat some sense back to these guys. "AND THREE DAYS? THAT'S HORRIBLE!"
"And because of that training, I managed to learn a new skill…" Yoshitake ignored my tsukomi and continued with his story. "I found out that reading a manga is better than reading a novel while taking a dump."
"THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH MUSCLE TRAINING!"
(And that's not even a skill!)
"DO YOU GUYS THINK YOU COULD GAIN MUSCLE FROM DOING RANDOM STUFF LIKE "FIST OF NORTHERN STAR"?"
"Calm down, Tadakuni-kun." Shinpachi came towards my direction. Maybe I was shouting too loud and disturbed the other students. "Take it easy, the class is about to start so I advice you not to waste too much energy on thi-"
Shipachi was cut off from his sentence when the late Motoharu accidently bumped him.
"Oh, I'm so-"Motoharu was about to apologize but made a scary face after seeing Shipachi's glasses fell on the floor. For some reason I actually went onto my knees and started shouting.
"SHINPACHI-KUN!"A lot of people gathered after hearing the terrible thing that happened to Shinpachi.
"Huh? What happened?"
"Hey! Shinpachi-kun! Can you hear me?"
"Shinpachi-kun! Are you alright!"
"Someone call an ambulance! QUICK!"
"Motoharu! YOU MURDERER!"
"What have I done…"Motoharu grabbed onto his hair as he realized the terrible thing he has just done. "Father… Mother… I'm sorry."
"OIIII! THAT'S NOT EVEN ME! WHY ARE YOU GUYS MAKING SUCH A BIG FUSS ABOUT MY GLASSES?" Shinpachi delivered his famous tsukomi.
"What's up with this commotion early in this morning? Don't you brats know that homeroom is about to start." Ginpachi-sensei came and tried to grasp the reason behind the shouting.
"Gin-san, you came at the right time." Shinpachi was relieved to finally get an adult on the scene. "Please snap them out of their idiocy."
"Ah~ it's about your glasses right? Alright, I will teach these brats that joke have already been used too much."Ginpachi-sensei started to push students away in order to separate the crowd. "You brats, hurry up back to your seats, there is nothing to look at except for a pair of outdated glasses…SHINPACHI! WHAT ARE YOU DOING ON THE FLOOR?"
"NOT YOU TOO! AND WHO THE HECK ARE YOU REFERRING TO AS A PAIR OF OUTDATED GLASSES?"
"I'm sorry, sensei. It was me." Motoharu step forward and tried to confess his crime. "It was a mistake… I didn't know he would fall after I bumped into him… you can report me to the cops…"
"Don't worry Motoharu-kun. Shinpachi is alright." Ginpachi-sensei picked up the glasses. "See? He just had a scratch, nothing big. Here, I will take Shinpachi back to his desk and all of you should go back to your seat because homeroom is going to start."
"Sensei… Thank you…" Tears of being touched could be seen in the corner of Motoharu's eyes.
Everyone all headed towards their desks upon Ginpachi-sensei instruction. Ginpachi-sensei headed towards Shinpachi's desk and places the glasses on the seat.
"Here we go, now we are ready for class. Right, Shinpachi-kun?"
"LIKE HELL WE ARE READY!" Shinpachi kicked Ginpachi-sensei's head into his desk and somehow I'm also snapped out of the curse of Shinpachi's glasses. "AND WHAT'S UP WITH THAT GOOD TEACHER DRAMA SCENE? YOU THINK THIS IS "GTO"?"
"Oh, good to see you. Shinpachi-kun." Ginpachi-sensei turned his bleeding face towards Shinpachi.
"Good to see me my ass! Weren't we talking to each other a few minutes before?"
"What?" Ginpachi-sensei was surprised to hear that statement as he wipes off the blood on his face. "There are 2 of you?"
"THERE IS ONLY ONE AND THAT'S ME!"
"But the one sitting on the chair looks like you… no, it looks more like Shinpachi than you!"
"Are you implying that I'm just an accessory?" Shinpachi said it sarcastically. Maybe he is just making a joke.
"That's right, Shinpachi-kun." Ginpachi-sensei was looking at the glass that was placed on the chair.
"At least look at me when you address me." Shinpachi spat.
"So by the rules of this school, I am going to confiscate your belonging that is against the dress code of this school."
"HOW IS WEARING A GLASSES AGAINST THE DRESS CODE?" After Shinpachi finished, Ginpachi-sensei grabbed Shinpachi by his arm. "HUH? WHY ARE YOU GRABBING ME? EH? AM I THAT "BELONGING"YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT?"
"Come to me after-school…" Ginpachi-sensei suddenly stopped by the window next to me and gave a sigh. Both Shinpachi and I are puzzled. "To carry such a troublesome object to school… maybe I should just throw it out the window?"
"Eh? What are you- AHHHHhhhhhh~" Shinpachi was lift up and really thrown down the window.
"WHY?!" (WHY?!) Both my mouth and mind said the same thing after witnessing such scene. "D-DID YOU JUST TOSS SHINPACHI-KUN DOWN THE WINDOW? WHY DID YOU DO THAT?"
"Why do you ask?" Ginpachi-sensei made a face like it's the obvious thing to do to throw someone out the window. "Since it was heavy and big, it will be troublesome to carry it back to my office."
"That doesn't mean you should throw it out! I mean you were even throwing a person out!"
"Don't worry." Ginpachi-sensei put both of his hands on top of my shoulders; I think he did that to make me know everything is alright. "Since he is Shinpachi so he will be all good. He is a pro after-all."
"PRO IN WHAT?! AN OBJECT BEING THROWN DOWN FROM THE SECOND FLOOR WILL SURELY BE DAMAGED! LET ALONE A PERSON!"
Ginpachi-sensei gave me a puzzled look. "Hmm? Tadakuni… Haven't you heard that "A tiger will put its child in dangerous situation so it could learn more about survival"?"
"ALL I SEE WAS YOU SENDING SHINPACHI-KUN STRAIGHT DOWN TO HIS DEATH!"
Drrr… Drrr…
"Hello? Yes, it's me." Hidenori picked up his phone and answered it as if he was trained in an army. "Alright, I will be there."
After ending the call and putting his phone back into his pocket, Hidenori started to climb out of the window next to his.
"Wait! What are you doing?" I can't help but to ask as Hidenori puts his left on the window.
"Sorry, Tadakuni… but duty calls."
He then grabbed onto the rope that was dropped from a helicopter and it took him away before I could even I could even respond.
"Shinsengumi… " I mumbled softly as I recognize the symbol on the helicopter. "Huh, sensei? Is Hidenori working for them, the cops? Isn't it too dangerous for him and he is not even in the legal age yet?!"
"Don't worry; we have all sorts of kids working on all sort of jobs in my world."
(What sort of world is that?)
Grrr… Grrr…
"Oh, that was me." Yoshitake confessed that weird sound was from him and before I could respond he is already halfway out the window.
"Sorry, Tadakuni… but duty calls."
"Wait! Where are you going?" I'm sure he isn't hired by absurd guys like the Shinsengumi.
"To the toilet."
"YOU JUST WANTED TO TAKE A SHIT! AND WOW, YOUR STOMACH IS STILL UPSET FROM THAT STRAWBERRY MILK?" Yoshitake jumped out as I make my tsukomi. "AND CAN'T YOU GUYS AT LEAST USE THE DOOR? THIS IS THE SECOND FLOOR!"
I noticed that only my voice could be heard. I looked towards the rest of the class and all of them were facing the front and was all quiet.
(What the hell? Why are they all keeping quiet after seeing all that? Are they just ignoring these absurd stuffs that's happening right before their eyes?)
"Yo, guys. I'm back." It was Hidenori's normal Gintoki-voice.
I look towards the window and saw the normal Hidenori climbing down the window with a big brown bag behind him.
(That was fast! And wow, Hidenori is back to normal.)
"Since we are only out there to rescue a person from a falling off a building so it was over in an instant." Another person also climbed through the window.
It's the black-haired Vice Commander of Shinsengumi, Hijikata Toshirou.
"And here is the person we have rescued."
Hijikata opened the brown bag and revealed the content inside.
It was...
(SHINPACHI-KUN!?)
"Since we were able to save this kid and at the same time train our new recruit so I would say this mission was a success."
(Success? Can't you see that Shinpachi-kun has mud and bruises all over him? Furthermore he's eyes are all rolled back!)
"...and I believe he is the accessory of that four-eyes." He was pointing at Shinpachi-kun's glasses and started to walk over to it while carrying Shinpachi.
(How mean! Calling a person an "accessory" even though he's a cop.)
"Hey, you. You should take good care of your possessions. We are not always there for you, okay?" Hijikata tried to shove Shinpachi into the desk. "Huh? That's strange... This won't fit into the desk."
(Of course it won't. It wasn't even meant to keep a person in it from the beginning.)
"AHAHAHA! How naive, Shinsengumi!" A long-hair person wearing my school's uniform was standing by the door. "Haven't you heard that "It takes an accessory 3 days to grow out of their desk"?"
(ENOUGH WITH THAT SAYING! YOU GUYS ARE OBLIVIOUSLY JUST ABUSING IT!)
"You! You are...!" Hijikata was staring at Katsura in disguise with a surprised look.
(Did he find out?)
"Who are you?"
(HOW COULD YOU NOT NOTICE? HE IS JUST WEARING A SCHOOL UNIFORM AND A FAKE THICK MUSTACHE!)
"Me? I'm just your average student of this school." Katsura pointed his thumb at himself. "The name is Fruit Punch Samurai G."
(THERE'S NO SIGN OF AVERAGE IN THAT NAME! AND FURTHERMORE, THERE'S NO WAYS A STUDENT WILL HAVE SUCH NAME!)
"Oh, nice to meet you. Fruit Punch Samurai G." Hijikata extended his hand and shook hands with Katsura. "I am Hijikata Toshirou."
(He bought it? That obvious lie?)
"So what do you think we should do with this piece of "accessory"?"
"That? All we need to do is open the storage locker here and place it inside." Katsura placed Shinpachi inside the locker where all the cleaning equipments are kept. "Then we close it and pretend nothing had happened."
(WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? A TERRORIST IS TEACHING A COP HOW TO HIDE A CORPSE!)
"Oh~ That's a lot of help. Thanks."
"You are welcome. Then see you later."
"Bye."
(And both the cop and terrorist became good buddies!)
"Yo, guys. I'm back." It was Yoshitake with his normal voice. He jumped down from the window and sat on his in his own desk.
"Huh? Yoshitake, I could understand that Hidenori could get through the window by using the helicopter but how did you do that?"
"It's easy." Yoshitake showed a proud face. "I used the window from the class next to ours."
"ARE YOU AN IDIOT? WHY CAN'T YOU JUST WALK IN THROUGH THE DOOR IF YOU CAN DO THAT WITH THE ROOM NEXT TO OURS?"
"Alright, lets start the lecture." Ginpachi-sensei tried to settle the class down by starting his lecture. He took out his JUMP and started reading. ""Ahan! "Manaka-dono, please turn off the light." Ignoring what Nishino said… Manaka attacks her like a beast, and rides her like a hor-"."
"WE HAVE ALREADY GONE THROUGH THAT! JUST HOW DESPERATE ARE YOU TRYING READ THAT CHAPTER!"
A Daily Meeting
The Student Council of Sanada North Boys High School has a strange reputation among the students from different school.
It's because the Student Council is managed by a bunch of delinquent-looking students...
There is a blond hair delinquent-looking student, the Vice President.
There is a cap-wearing delinquent-looking student, Karasawa Toshiyuki.
There is also a delinquent-looking delinquent, Motoharu.
And last the foolish-looking fool, the President.
"OI!" Motoharu shouted in rage while facing the President, "WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY "DELINQUENT-LOOKING DELINQUENT"? IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE!"
"Calm down, calm down." The President was holding both his hands out to cool off Motoharu while sitting, luxury, on his president chair. "To make things fair I even called myself a fool in the intro."
"No, you were just being an idiot!"
"You two, please quiet it down, we are trying to have a meeting." Said the Vice President while standing in front of the white board.
"..." Said Karasawa while sitting in front of the table that is in front of the Vice President that is in front the white board.
"HE DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING!" Motoharu was shouting in a direction where no one could be seen. "AND WHAT'S UP WITH THOSE "IN FRONT"? IT'S TOO LONG! WHAT ARE YOU? A AMATEUR WRITER!?"
"Relax, Motoharu... You've been shouting since the beginning of this section."
"What do you mean by "this section", Pres? You know you shouldn't say something like that!"
"Don't worry, Motoharu~ Since nobody even cares about that stuff these days." The President said as he took a seat on the chair next to the Vice President, "So what meeting are we having today?"
"Hmm... It's about our reputations the students from other schools have about us." The Vice President said with a frown on his face.
"Hoo~ What about it." The President looks serious, maybe it is because he is the President.
"Back in the days, there are a lot of bad rumors about our Student Council because of our delinquent looks..." The Vice President made a small pause there before continuing. One could see that he is having trouble to get the next bit out. "But lately their opinions have changed after helping the students from other school."
"Well, isn't that a good thing?" The President made a smile of satisfaction as if he is a father seeing his sons growing up. "What's the problem with that?"
"The problem comes after that!" Vice President said in a manner as if he is actually asking for advice. "We've been asked to help with the problems other students have! Even with finding a lost dog!"
"It's because you and Karasawa never refuses it!" Motoharu slammed on the table. "That's why they all just come to us to do odd jobs!"
"But they have their own Student Council-"
"It's their Student Council that's sending them to us!"
"…" The Vice President couldn't say anything.
"…" Karasawa didn't say anything.
"And wait!" Motoharu shouted as if he just realized something. "Karasawa hasn't spoken once yet. What's wrong?"
"Ah~ him… He's just sulking over being mistaken for the wrong person." The Vice President looked at Karasawa and then closed his eyes. "Apparently some reviewer thought he was the Shogun of Gintama."
"WHAT!? This some serious problem!" Motoharu was astonished that a person such as Karasawa with so such distinctive trait be mistaken as someone else.
"Alright!" The President raised his right hand high in excitement. "Let's find this reviewer and teach him a lesson."
"F-I-N-D T-H-E R-E-V-I-E-W-E-R…" The Vice President wrote the same thing on the white board. "Okay, now we got one thing settled."
"No, we didn't even solve our primary objective." Motoharu commented in a cold voice.
*Kong* *Kong*
A few knocks at the door interrupted the meeting and the Vice President went to open the door.
"Yes? Do you need anything from the Student Council?" The Vice President asked the person who knocked the door.
The person or rather the thing is actually a duck-looking creature or costume. It was staring at the Vice President with its wide eyes and was saying nothing. It didn't say anything but instead lift up a white wooden sign with words written on it.
"[Have you seen this person?]" The creature presented a picture of a long-haired man to the Vice President.
"No, we haven't…" The Vice President gave some thought. "So he's lost, huh. What is his name?"
The creature turned the sign around, "[His name is Fruit Punch Samurai G.]"
"IT'S NOT "FRUIT PUNCH SAMURAI G"!" A loud angry voice could be heard within the school. "IT'S KATSURA!"
"[That's him!]"
"Alright! Motoharu, Karasawa! Let's go chase him down!"
"See! This is exactly what I was complaining about…" Motoharu complained as he got up.
"…" Karasawa was still speechless but still got up.
The three left with the creature to find the lost man leaving the President all alone in the room.
"…" The President still has his earlier position with his hand high in the air.
He then looked at the door where everyone just left and put down his hand. He walked over to his desk and sat down on his president chair. He made a thinking pose by placing both his hands in front of his mouth.
"I am the President they voted for, right?"
It was a question that arises from being left alone all the time.
The Literature… Man!?
During the afternoon when the sun begins to set and the wind fly through the city quietly; Hidenori would normally lay on the riverbank that is relatively close to the bridge. He comes here regularly, to stare off at the river or at the sky, in order to kill time because both of his bad friends had part-time jobs to do. But there is another reason for him to come here…
(Because it's fun chatting with her.)
Yes, since the day after meeting "her", the Literature Girl, this place became a place he would enjoy coming. Whenever they meet in this place, they would normally exchange words that are beyond human understanding. Of course the girl will not always be the one here with Hidenori… sometimes other people would come and sit behind Hidenori (unintentionally) and Hidenori also tried those strange words on them which led to many awkward moments or the Literature Girl chasing after them.
(She's late…)
It's been at least an hour past their "usual meeting time" but she had yet to appear.
(Maybe she has some urgent to attend… Oh? She's here.)
Just as Hidenori was about to give up and head home, a few footsteps came from behind him and stopped.
So he decided to turn his head towards the girl and greet her.
"Hey. The win-" He suddenly stopped after noticing that the person wasn't the girl he was waiting for.
The person who took a seat behind Hidenori was a man with curly white-hair and wearing a white kimono. That man had a JUMP in his hand.
He is…
(Why is Sensei here!?) Hidenori quickly turned his head to the front facing the river. (Why is he here reading JUMP? And why does he have to sit behind me? It's so awkward!)
Gintoki suddenly picked up his head from his Jump and noticed that he was sitting behind Hidenori. He begins staring at Hidenori.
(Wait, on second thought... since we are men so there shouldn't be any awkwardness between us, right?)
After a few seconds, as if it was a sudden realization, Gintoki quickly put his book up his face to hide away his awkwardness.
(WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!? IT WILL MAKE THIS AWKWARD IF YOU ACTED ALL AWKWARD!)
There was silence among those two men and as time pass the awkwardness increases.
(This won't do! If we continue like this then none of us can leave without hurting each others' feeling.)
After a few more seconds of silence Hidenori decided to break this heavy atmosphere.
(Alright! Here comes my poser phrase!)
"The wind is tr-"
"The wind is troubled today."
(Eh!? I can't believe he stole my line! But how!? And I never knew that line was such an embarrassing line until I hear it from someone else… I can't believe I used it on so many people!)
Hidenori, with his astonished face, peeped back at Gintoki to see Gintoki staring at the river with a distant look.
(What the hell! He's really into this! He looks like he is waiting for a reply! Damn it, I guess I have no choice.)
"But this wind is wee-"
"But this wind is weeping a little."
(HEY! WHAT'S THE POINT IN WAITING FOR A REPLY IF YOU ARE GOING TO ANSWER it YOURSELF!?) A cross-shaped vein could be seen on Hidenori's head. (AND HE STOLE MY LINE AGAIN! JUST HOW IS HE DOING SO?)
Hidenori noticed that Gintoki was flipping through the pages of his JUMP.
(It can't be! After-all "Daily Lives Of Highschool Boys" is only publish on GANGAN ONLINE not in JUMP!)
"AHAHAHA! This manga is so funny!" Gintoki was holding a smartphone in his hand. "Reading GANGAN Online is quite amazing isn't it, Tabata-kun?"
"…" Hidenori looks like he wanted to cry. He stood up and started running towards the bridge. "GIVE BACK MY FANTASY AND MY WORRIES!"
"Hmm? What's up with him?"
Gintoki watched Hidenori's figure disappear and then resume reading manga on his smartphone. Everything was all good until he felt something bad is going to happen.
"!?" Gintoki looked back and saw a girl with long black-hair and she was surrounded by a dark aura.
"…" The girl said nothing but approached Gintoki slowly… And!
The Indoor Adventure 3
"I'm bored…" Hidenori was staring out the paper window of the Yorozuya's lobby. "Let's do some Dragon Quest."
Yoshitake closed the manga he was reading in response to Hidenori's proposal.
"Wait! Are we seriously doing it again?" I protested to Hidenori who was casually taking a seat in front of me.
"Please choose your adventure log." Hidenori used a machine voice to make him sound like the system of a game.
"Oi! Are you even listening to me?" Hidenori was just staring at me; he looks like he is waiting for a reply. "Alright, then… I will choose adventu-"
Suddenly Yoshitake grabbed Hidenori into one of his arms and point a "hand-"gun at Hidenori.
"Uwoooo! Uwooo! Don't come any closer!" Yoshitake shouted in a deep voice. "Don't you care what will happen to her?"
"Pa- Papa!"
"I HAVEN'T EVEN CHOSEN MY ADVENTURE LOG YET! And why are we starting from this scene? I thought I saved before!"
"Relax, Tadakuni." Hidenori reverted back to himself. "It's just a preview to get those three into the story."
Hidenori pointed at the Yorozuya trio who are staring at us… Do they want to join us?
"Then do we have to act all that out from the beginning?"
"Heh! what are you asking, Tadakuni? That will take too much effort." Hidenori made a smirk as if he looking at idiot. "We could just narrate it out instead."
"THEN DO THAT FROM THE BEGINNING!"
Hidenori ignored me and begins his narration…
"We are the one of the armies fighting the Demon King. We starting training and…" Hidenori paused a bit before continuing. "Then we were on our way to save a little girl and encountered a Demon King. Thus we were defeated."
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU SKIPPING IN THE NARRATION FOR?! I TOTALLY DON'T GET WHAT'S GOING ON!"
"Don't worry Tadakuni. Look." Hidenori pointed at the trio whom are discussing among themselves. "It seems like they understand the whole story from head to tail."
(That's a miracle!)
"So you mean…" Gintoki voiced out their final result from their discussion. "You guys are a bunch of Heroes whom are tasked to save a little girl and fight the monsters called "Demon King"."
"LOOK! THEY TOTALLY MISUNDERSTOOD YOUR SUMMARY!"
"Alright. Looks like everyone was saved by the priest of this town." Yoshitake said with a deep voice.
"Wait! Don't just move the story forward on your own!"
"Since we have lost to the Demon King so all of our equipments are all broken as well." Hidenori said in a deep voice and starting to take our his clothe. Yoshitake was also doing the same.
"wait, Wait, WAIT! What the hell are you guys taking off your shirts for?" I'm trying to stop them from taking this indecent action in front of the readers otherwise the author will have to change the rating of this fanfic.
"Rookie, you fool!" Yoshitake with the same deep voice scolded me. "What is the point in wearing armor that serves no use anymore?"
"No, my clothes are completely fine... Hey! Stop grabbing onto my shirt! Are you trying to tear it?"
"Beware that those damaged equipment will bring nothing but misfortune to the wearer." Hidenori used a funny voice that I don't even know how to describe.
"YOU GUYS ARE THE ONES THAT ARE TRYING TO BRING MISFORTUNE TO ME! STOP TRYING TO MAKE ME A EXHIBITIONIST!" I finally managed to push those half-naked freaks away from me and they also seemed to give up on me. I sighed in relieve and asked. "And who the hell are you two anyway? I won't know just by listening to your voice."
"I'm the Captain." The Captain (Yoshitake) said in his usual deep voice.
"I'm Depp, Bathhouse Owner, Hopper and Jack." Depp, Bathhouse Owner, Hop...
"STICK TO ONE CHARACTER AT A TIME! ARE YOU TRYING TO CONFUSE ME ON PURPOSE!"
"Phew... it's quite cold here isn't it?" The Captain (Yoshitake) was rubbing his arms to generate heat.
"Ah, ah. I think it's because it's winter in this town now." Jack (Hidenori) said in his deep voice.
"The thing that is in winter right now is your head! It's because you idiots took off your clothes!" Tadakuni (Tadakuni) said in his usual voice. "IF THE NAME AND VOICE ARE THE SAME THEN DON'T BOTHER NARRATING IT! AND SINCE WHEN DID A NARRATOR APPEAR?"
"Alright! Rookie, Jack! Let's walk around the town and ask whether there is something that could warm us up." The Captain (Yoshitake) made an order.
"Okay, let's the mission start!"
"JUST PUT ON YOUR CLOTHES!"
Hidenori and Yoshitake ignored my comment and continued are their own. But all they do is walking around the room while rubbing their arms.
But it's not just them walking around but there another two. It was Gintoki and Kagura.
"What are you doing?" I approached Gintoki.
"Huh? Can't you see that I'm a NPC of this town? AH!" The NPC (Gintoki) suddenly made a face as if he just remembered something. "Welcome to the town of... something."
"IF YOU HAVEN'T THOUGHT OUT THE TOWN NAME THEN DON'T SAY IT! AND DO WE REALLY NEED NPC IN THIS TYPE OF ROLE PLAYING?"
"Hah... haven't you seen in RPG that NPC's are everywhere. They are essential characters needed in the game. Imagine a RPG without NPC's... How will the Player collect information without them?"
(He's got the point. A RPG does need NPC's after-all since it's like a virtual world of its own.)
"Sukonbu, monjayaki and monjayaki." NPC (Kagura) is talking to the Captain (Yoshitake).
"I see, I see. So that's a useful information to defeat the Demon King." The Captain looks delighted and started to write things on his notebook (Yoshitake's palm).
(HOW IS THAT USEFUL!? I THINK SHE JUST WANTED TO EAT! AND WAIT HOW DO YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND WHAT SHE SAID?)
"Those two... must be pros." Gintoki showed a shocked face.
"Pros in what? Idiocy?"
"Leave them be, Tadakuni." ?'?'? (Shinpachi) said with a sigh. "It's one of their ways of having fun."
"Is this also your way of having fun?" I gave a disgusted look to Shinpachi.
"Of course not! I'm not some kind of pervert!"
"Then could you please explain why are you standing on one leg with your arms stretched out like that?" I tried stepping away from him a little. "And furthermore, why are you only wearing your underwear?"
"It can't be helped right? Whenever we are into this kind of game, I always have to become something like a Pachi (Christmas Tree) or Pachi (Punching bag)."
"And now? What kind of Pachi are you?"
"I dunno... maybe some kind of statue of this no-name town."
"I pity you..."
"WELL DONE! Tadakuni! You have found Pachi!" My conversation was interrupted by Captain (Yoshitake) who was running towards us with Jack (Hidenori). "With this sacred item you found we could get an incredible blessing from it."
"Incredible blessing?" Both Shinpachi and I questioned at the same time.
"That's right! Tadakuni! It's the blessing we needed the most." Jack (Hidenori) sped up to keep up with the Captain's (Yoshitake) high speed. "The blessing we needed the most is... WARMTH!"
As soon as the word "WARMTH" was said, a punch from each of the running people landed on Shinpachi's face and stomach.
(THIS PACHI HERE IS STILL JUST A PUNCHING BAG!)
But that's not the end of it, they combo'ed their punches with more punches in various parts of Shinpachi.
"STOP! ARE YOU GUYS TRYING TO KILL HIM?!" I tried pulling Hidenori's hand to stop this heartless assault on Shinpachi.
"ARE YOU STUPID, TADAKUNI!" Jack (Hidenori) shouted in rage and I received a punch in my stomach as well. "Why are you trying to stop us? To us he is like Santa of Warmth!"
"AND TO HIM YOU GUYS ARE LIKE SATAN FROM HELL!"
Both Yoshitake and Hidenori ignored me and continued with their evil actions.
(Damn, I need to find something that will stop them otherwise this section of work can't be published!)
I looked around the room hurriedly to see if there is something that could do the work and my eyes happened to stop on a person.
It was Kagura.
She was standing there and watching how Shinpachi was beaten up by my bad friends. She doesn't look so happy about that.
(Shoot! If those two continue beating down her friend then they will be exorcised by her! I need to stop them quick.)
"!"
Just before I could voice out my warning, Kagura already dashed towards them and clenched her fists.
Her fist was quick and precise and they landed on the stomach of... Shinpachi?
(WHY!? WHY IS AN NPC JOINING THE SIDE OF THE ANTI-HEROES?)
"Monjayaki!" Kagura shouted on top of her voice while repetitively beating Shinpachi. "GIVE ME MONJAYAKI!"
(EEEEEH!? YOU ARE PUNCHING HIM JUST FOR THAT?! HOW DESPERATE ARE YOU! AND WAIT, ARE YOU GOING TO EAT UP WHAT HE THROWS UP!)
"Zzzz..." Gintoki is lying on a couch.
(WHAT THE HELL! GIN-SAN IS FAST ASLEEP! SINCE WHEN DID THAT HAPPEN? HOW WAS HE ABLE TO SLEEP IN A ROOM WHERE SOMEONE IS GETTING TORTURED?)
Suddenly, the door to this room was slid opened and my little sister stepped in. Everyone stopped and looked at her as if she had caught all the attention of the people in this room.
She looked around the room, which was in a mess now, and sighed.
"Kagura-chan, dinner is ready so let's leave those idiots here and go to eat." She then left the room with another sigh.
"Yahoooo! FOOD!" Kagura ran after my little sister.
"Phew... That was quite some workout, huh. Time to go home, Yoshitake."
"Right after you, Hidenori."
The duo left shortly after Kagura.
"Maybe I will go out to buy some Strawberry Milk." Gintoki said and went out of the house.
All the people have left leaving only me and Shinpachi, lying on the floor, who was surrounded by Monjayaki. I looked around the room and then looked down on Shinpachi.
"Hey." I was the one that broke the silence. "Should I save at this point?"
"Please... do..."
Funky Girl's Preview
"Hi, hi! Everyone! Finally it's our time for debut!"
"Wow, I never knew we would have some time here in this fanfic."
"Well, we are only here as a replacement for "author's note". Yanagin, Ikushima."
"What the hell are you talking about, Hanbara? We should treat this as our chance, because if we get famous enough we might be able to get our own spin-off! Right, Ikushima?"
"Even with that said, but the specs here are pretty low quality... I mean look at this, we don't even any words that describes our movements."
"It's like we are in a nameless script."
"No worries! Ikushima, Hanbara. We could always borrow elements from other novel. Said Yanagi with a serious face (Reference from the Toaru series)."
"YOU ARE JUST USING THIRD PERSON! AND WHAT THE HELL IS THAT "(Reference from -)"? IT'S ANNOYING!"
"Huh? Hanbara? You are back to your straight man."
"Ya, what's wrong with?"
"I thought you reverted back to your-"archdaemon"-self after the end of the manga. How is this happening?"
"Ah~ That? If you want… I cAn AlWaYs TuRn BaCk RiGhT AwAy."
"NONONO! That's not what I meant! Right, Ikushima?"
"O-Of course! We didn't ask for that! It's just how were you able to do that?"
"Oh~ that? It's just a new feature the author gave me for this fanfic."
"WHAT!? WHAT WITH THIS UNFAIR TREATMENT!"
"WHY ONLY HANBARA? IS IT BECAUSE OF HER FLAT CHEST? YOU PETTANKO-AUTHOR!"
"!" "!"
"AWAWAW! WHAT ARE YOU TWO DOING? Hanbara, Yanagin? STOP PULLING MY HAIR!"
"If you guys want I could try to think of something for you girls..."
"Huh? Who are you? Are you a friend of Hanbara's brother?"
"I don't think he is, I never seen him before."
"It doesn't matter who I am but I need to go make dinner now so could you hurry up and do your job?"
"Oh? How could we forget! Right! Hanbara, Ikushima! Are you all ready?"
"Yep!" "I'm ready!"
"Then on the count to 3."
"1..." "2..." "3!"
"NEXT TIME Doorstep To AdultHood! Yoshiwara!"
"Looks like the girls are getting their debut!"
"Then see you all next time!"
"And thank you for reading!"
"Let's just hope I don't get de-motivated anymore... Ah! I need to say something about disclaimer..."
"Ahem! I don't own Gintama or Daily lives of Highschool Boys."
