Chapter 2

I looked up at the burning afternoon sky. It had cooled down slightly, but the dry, desert air was still quite hot. Coming out of Verris, I could tell that both Mene and Hikari were both feeling much better. Mene was bobbing around lightly and cheerfully. Hikari was more reserved. She was still in her human form, and, though she wasn't usually so quiet in her human form, I could tell she felt much better than she had earlier.

"Okay, are you guys ready to go?" I asked, staring south down Cactuar Trail.

"Kupo-po!" Mene cheered happily.

"I'm ready when you are," Hikari said confidently. I smiled.

"Okay! Let's go!" I replied. She took the saddle-bag off and handed it to me. I readjusted the strap as she began to morph back into her Chocobo form. Her body expanded and became bulkier as feathers sprouted and her lips mutated to form a beak. Her arms flattened out and expanded to become small, flightless wings. Her legs mutated into the bird's form's powerful running legs.

"Kweh!" She squawked when the transformation was complete. I put the saddle bag on her and climbed on, making sure I had everything. I held out my arms and Mene flew into them. Mene's Moogle form was too small and weak to be able to hold on when we were riding Hikari, and she ran too fast for him to keep up. So when we rode her, I carried him unless for some reason he was in his human form.

Holding Mene tightly, I patted Hikari's side, indicating I was ready as I hunched over, holding her tightly with my free hand to make sure I didn't fly off or get knocked off. She squawked again and took off down trail, lined on both sides by plenty of cacti and what appeared to be a few burrowed Cactuars. I hoped the Cactuars remained docile; I didn't really want to have to fight right now.

Mene's pom-pom kept bobbing in the wind as he clung tightly to me, gripping my black dress with all that his little Moogle paws could muster. I held him close to me, too. We'd done this a million times, and I knew he would be able to catch himself with his wings and float harmlessly to the ground if I did drop him and we'd just turn around and get him, but I always worried a little that I would drop him one day and he'd get seriously hurt.

The sun was starting to set, and the sky turned a brilliant orange that I couldn't help but stare at. I'd seen hundreds of sunsets while riding Hikari like this, but never deep in the desert. With nothing around to obscure the horizon except for the occasional cactus, the sunset was breathtaking.

The temperature was also dropping to what I guessed was a comfortable area for mortals. As an undead, I could sense the heat and cold, but I wasn't affected by it, and I didn't remember what it felt like to be hot or cold. I really didn't remember anything of what it was like to be human because it had been so long ago. I had no memory of my human life - they'd faded with time. I could, when I really struggled, remember what my parents had looked like, but even with them, I couldn't remember their names.

"Kupo?" Mene's voice came over the wind to me, bringing me out of my thoughts. I looked down. He was looking up at me inquisitively, which made me wonder just how long I'd been spaced out. I looked up at the setting sun, and it was a bit lower than I realized or remembered. It had apparently been a few minutes, at least.

"You still doing alright, Hikari?" I asked her.

"Kweh!" she squawked in reply. I could tell she was determined to get us there soon, but there wasn't a point. The opening ceremony started at sunset. We were missing it right now. I smiled. She really hated that I was missing it. I didn't want her to feel bad, but it kind of moved me that she did.

"According to the directions," I called out to her again, "Once we see a huge sand dune on our left, we'll be about halfway there, so that'll be a good place to stop for the night, alright?"

"Kweh?"

"We can go the rest of the way in the morning. You two need sleep," I told her.

"Kweh!" she squawked again. I knew she wanted to go the whole way, but I could tell she knew I was right.

I marvelled at how this little trail guided by cacti could be so completely straight. It didn't curve or turn or anything. Then again, we were in the middle of a wide-open desert. The trail didn't have anything to curve around, so why wouldn't it go straight? I wondered who would've gone all this way planting cactus after cactus just so there'd be a trail through the desert. Either it was someone who was making a lot of money, or was a really kind person to posterity.

It wasn't too long before I saw the huge dune on the left the directions had been talking about. It was literally RIGHT beside the trail. Hikari slowed to a stop, and I climbed off. Mene fluttered down to the ground and kicked at the sand in the sand dune.

"This isn't natural, kupo!" he stated, "This sand is different from the desert sand!" I crouched and ran my hand through the sand on the ground slowly, then dusted it off. Then, I stood up and ran the same hand through the sand of the dune.

"You're right. The sand in this dune is a lot finer," I said softly.

"Kweh?" Hikari chirped.

"I'm sure whoever made this trail put this here as a landmark," I said, thinking out loud, "It's probably here to be a marker of some sort, just as we used it."

"You're probably right, kupo," Mene murmured. He turned and looked up at me. "I'm hungry, kupo."

"Kweh!" Hikari chirped in agreement.

"I figured. Let me get you guys your food," I said with a smile. Mene was trailing my feet as I walked over and reached into Hikari's saddlebag. I pulled out a few Kupo Nuts and some Gysahl Greens. I turned and held the Kupo Nuts out. Mene fluttered up and took them.

"Kupooo!" He exclaimed happily as he began to munch on one. I reached into my satchel, pulled out her trough, and laid it out in front of her. I put the Gysahl Greens in the trough. She squawked in satisfaction and began to eat as well.

I sat down and pulled my Mystic Elm log out of my satchel. "Fire!" As I invoked the spell, the log caught fire. Mystic Elm didn't burn up, but could simply burn forever. I sat down by the fire and watched them eat their food. This was an advantage of having them prefer to not be in their human forms: they didn't usually want human foods, which could prove cumbersome to travel with. All they usually wanted to eat were Kupo Nuts and Gysahl Greens.

Watching them eat, I realized that I was thirsty. I groaned and got up, looking around. Mene and Hikari noticed, and I just nodded to them. They understood exactly what I was doing whenever I gave them that signal. I walked away from the little camp. I searched the area for any desert goblins that may be roaming around. I hoped there was at least one, or at least a rogue imp somewhere.

I couldn't find a soul, and there wasn't much searching that could be done. Other than the huge sand dune and the cacti that made up the trail, there was nothing. There weren't even hills, really. All you could see was...sand. I didn't want to use much energy, but it was an important situation. I closed my eyes and focused on the "Scan" technique that Hikari had taught me. As a Black Mage, I could use magic with the skill, giving it much more potential than when she used it, but as a Thief, she was much more skilled at using it, given that it was ordinarily a skill of Thief specialty.

I focused on waht my magic was telling me. I could sense the presence of Mene and Hikari back near the camp. I searched with my mind's eye away from there, moving out in a slow, circular motion from their focal point. I hoped there would be some sort of life form perhaps buried in the sand or something. I sensed a couple of Cactuars lying dormant, but Cactuars didn't have blood, so that didn't help. I moved my energy scanning outwards still, moving past where I was with the circles and deep into the desert. I didn't find anything else.

I cursed and walked back to the camp. They were done eating by now. I pulled the canteen off my belt and poured a little bit of water into the trough. I gave some more to Mene to drink.

"Any luck finding something to feed off, kupo?" Mene asked me in between gulps of water. I sighed and sat down at the fire, staring into it, hating myself for what I was about to have to ask them.

"No. There's nothing that lives out here, really," I muttered, "That goblin from earlier was probably nomadic. He could've been from one of the few goblin clans that live out here. Either way, it was lucky."

"Kupo. Well, you know we're an option, kupo. We really don't mind," he said softly. I smiled sadly.

"I know. I appreciate it so much, Mene. You too, Hikari," I said sadly, "And I hate that I have to ever accept that offer. It kills me a little every single time. I do." He fluttered over to me and tugged at my arm.

"It can't do that, kupo. You're immortal." I actually had to laugh a little at his joke. I hugged him and stared back into the fire.

"Well, it looks like I'm going to have to take you up on your offer tonight," I said sadly.

"Kupo. Whose turn is it?" he asked me. I thought for a minute.

"I think...it's Hikari's," I told him. We looked up at her. She nodded solemnly. I got up and walked over to her. "You sure about this, Hikari?" She looked at me and squawked, nodding her head. A single tear formed in my eye. I'd done this several times over the years, but I still wasn't comfortable with or used to it in the slightest. I ran my fingers through her feathers, stroking her neck and body softly, feeling anxious and tense. Hikari lowered her neck to give me better access, which brought another tear. She wasn't afraid in the slightest, nor did she hesitate to help me. Mene was always the same way.

I nervously hunched over her and extended my retractible fangs. "Kweh..." she chirped anxiously. I knew she wanted me to hurry up. I would too, if I were her. I brushed the feathers out of the way right there and all at once sunk my fangs into her throat, intentionally missing her vein so that she wouldn't lose any more blood than I needed. I felt her inhale sharply - presumably from pain - and I shed one more tear. I wished with everything in me that it didn't have to be this way.

I began to drink.

I'd had enough practice with this to know how much of her blood I could drink before it started to affect her. I knew she could stand to lose more blood than Mene usually could. Mene preferred to give blood in his human form when he had to, because he actually had much more blood to give in that form. Hikari was opposite for the same reason: she was bigger as a Chocobo than a human, and therefore had more blood to give in that form.

However, I didn't particularly care for the taste of Chocobo blood, but it was just as well, given that I didn't really enjoy (or even want to enjoy) taking their blood in the first place. Mene's human blood tasted much better, but I didn't let myself really enjoy the taste. I only did this when I had to because I had to.

She stood very still and rigid, trying not to move around too much. I constantly stroked her back gently as I drank, perhaps trying to soothe her, but probably more for trying to soothe myself. I drank very slowly, as I always did when I fed off of her or Mene. I couldn't let myself get too enthralled in the thirst and drink too much, so I was always focused and careful, almost counting how much I took from her. I wished I could do it quickly and be done with it for both of us, but I just couldn't do that. It was much too risky.

After what seemed like forever, but probably was only a couple of minutes at most, I knew she couldn't stand to lose any more. I slowly pulled my mouth away and placed my hand on the wound to stop the bleeding. With my free hand, I reached into my satchel and pulled out my towel. I wiped my mouth with it and used it to try to clean up a small trickle of blood that had run down her neck, but it was already pretty well dried into her feathers. She'd have to clean herself up when we got to Asdex tomorrow.

"I'm so sorry," I whispered to her.

"Kweh!" she squawked, trying to reassure me she was perfectly fine. I lifted my hand up to make sure the bleeding had stopped - it had. I put the towel back in my satchel and hugged her tightly.

"Try to get some rest now," I told her softly. She nodded and crouched down into her sleeping position, fluttering her wings once or twice. I turned and saw Mene already asleep by the fire. I smiled. It was sometimes hard for me to believe that Mene was the older of the two. He could be so kiddish in some ways. I supposed that was probably just a part of being a Moogle.

I laid down, thinking about Mene and Hikari. I wondered what I would do when they aged past me. I'd always been older than both of them. Now, Mene was 16 years old. He was only a year away from passing me up in terms of physical age, and Hikari would only be another year behind him.

"I'll always be their mother, though," I whispered to myself and laughed a little. I thought about the life they'd spent with me for the past 14 years, and I wondered if they'd been better off if they'd known their actual parents and had a normal family life with them. I wondered who their actual parents were and what they'd been like. I wondered what had happened to them.

I'd found them while wandering through the Garnetane Rainforests 14 years ago. The situation even now didn't make sense to me. I'd heard a baby crying and heard a little boy saying "Don't cry, Sissy. Don't cry. Mommy will come back soon! She said so!" The boy sounded upset, too, and I didn't like the situation. Any two kids of that age should never be left in the rainforest alone, and I had a feeling their mother was not coming back.

I'd never liked little kids at all, but I couldn't just leave them there, so I followed the sound of the crying and the boy's voice until I found them not too far from the top of a waterfall. The boy had short, wavy brown hair. He was standing over a bassinet, trying to calm his baby sister down. His sister also had noticeable brown hair.

"What's the matter?" I'd asked him, brushing my blonde hair out of my eyes.

I'd found out that their mother had left them there, claiming she'd be right back, early that morning. I offered to help them find her, and the boy had insisted he and his sister, Hikari, shouldn't leave so that "Mommy can find us when she comes back." I offered to go out and try to find her, and he had clutched at my dress, begging me not to leave them alone again.

After a couple more hours of waiting, I decided there was no way by now that there mother would be returning, and I started crying for the children. The boy asked me what was wrong and I told him that I thought their Mommy wasn't coming back. He looked away and said, "I know. I gave up hoping a long time ago."

"Then why are you still waiting here?" I asked him.

"Because Hikari and I don't have anybuddy," he said, "I don't know where to go." That sad fact made me cry harder, and he walked up to me and took my hand.

"Hey, Miss, it's okay. We'll be okay," he assured me, and I couldn't help but smile. He was really strong and wise for his age, I'd realized. That was when I decided to take them with me. We'd been together ever since. I'd raised them as if they were my own. I'd even learned how to cook human food for them when they were little, before they'd learned how to transform. I still cooked for them usually when we were staying in Inns.

In the recent years, our relationship had evolved, though. They weren't just my kids now (though, to a very big part of me, they were still and always would be), but they were also my friends. They were my age now, after all. I tried not to treat them with the maternal tendencies I often wanted to anymore. I tried to just treat them like my best friends, and it was merely because of this that I was even willing to feed off of them at all. Up until they'd turned about 13 or 14, whenever I was desperate for blood, I'd just starve myself, despite their offering me theirs. I couldn't see how a mother could willingly feed off her own children.

There had even been a point where I'd had to go over four days without having anything to prey on because I'd refused to feed off of them, and I got to the point where I'd thought I was going to die. I couldn't even move anymore. They had gone out without me that day into the woods and found a rare forest imp. They captured and brought it back to me, incapacitated it, and gave it to me to drink. I'd been so touched.

Now that they were a bit older, they were more insistent that I didn't get overly thirsty anymore. I needed to feed two to three times a day, and they saw to it that I did, even though it sometimes meant drinking a little of their blood. I was willing to do it for their sake now, since they were older, but I still felt like a cruel mother whenever I did.

I looked over at them now. They both were sleeping. "Good night," I whispered, and rolled over, thinking about how lucky I was.

When the sun started to come up, I climbed to the top of the sand dune and watched the sunset from there. I hated being unable to go to sleep at night when they did, but I couldn't recall what it was like to sleep anyway, so I supposed it didn't matter. It was just that, on nights like these, I had nothing better to do all night than just lie there, thinking. However, I had developed over all these years a significant appreciation for watching the sun rise and set.

After the sun had ascended into the sky, I looked down at the little makeshift camp to see Mene awake and staring up at me. Hikari was still asleep and I knew she needed to rest. She'd lost a bunch of blood last night, plus she'd run all evening. She'd be running more when she woke up, so I wanted her to get as much rest as she could.

I slid down the dune. "Kupo! Good morning, Kaoru," Mene said softly. He rose up off the ground and hugged me. He liked hugs; he hugged me frequently, and often hugged Hikari, too, when she was in her human form. I hugged him back and cuddled him a little bit.

"Good morning, Mene. How'd you sleep?" I replied in a low voice.

"Kupo! I slept great!" he whispered excitedly as he fluttered back to the ground,"The desert sand is comfortable, kupo."

"That's good. Are you hungry? If you're really hungry, I can try to get you a couple of Kupo Nuts out of the bag without waking Hikari up," I told him. He tilted his head thoughtfully.

"No, I'm fine," he replied, "Don't risk waking Hikari up. She needs her sleep, kupo." I nodded and sat down next to him.

"I know she does," I assured him, "I'm not going to bother her." I looked over at her. She looked like she was sleeping well. She wasn't making any sound, and wasn't moving or ruffling around much. She was still, but in a completely organic way. She didn't look stiff or rigid really, just still.

I stood up and dusted myself off, feeling a sense of uncleanliness. I'd gotten sand all inside my mage's dress; it was aggravating me and making me feel dirty. I adjusted my bra and shook the dress out, trying to get some of the sand out. It helped a little, but what I needed to do was take a bath and wash my clothes. I resolved to do that first thing as soon as we got to the Inn in Asdex.

I shook my cloak out, and took off my witch's hat, knowing that it could prevent any sand I may accidentally contract into my hair from escaping. I ran my fingers through my shoulder-length blonde hair and pulled out a few grains of sand. "Clearly, they're on every part of me," I muttered to myself, frowning.

"Kupo?"

"Just got sand all over me," I sighed.

"Oh. Why did you lay in the sand last night, kupo?" he asked.

"I don't know, really," I said. I notided he was dusting the sand off himself. "I just didn't have anything else to do."

"Kupo," he nodded and shook out and dusted the sand out of his fur. I was jealous of how easily both he and Hikari could simply dust themselves off. In most cases, if they needed to do something that required a bit more cleaning, all they had to do was dip in some water. Hikari could use that at the moment to wash off the blood. I could use a shower at the moment, myself.

I sat down by the fire again, staring into it. I loved fire. I could watch it burn for hours. Mene wouldn't get too close to it, however. He'd slept a good ten feet away from it, and was still not getting close. He was always like this. Mene was pyrophobic.

I smiled and scooted back and waved him over to me. He waddled over. "What is it, kupo?"

"Just sit with me," I said softly. He peered up at me curiously. I gave him a goofy thumbs-up smile, and he emitted a high-pitched Moogle laugh and sat down.

We sat in silence for a couple of hours, just staring at the sky, the fire, and the desert. It was getting pretty hot, and I could tell Mene was becoming a little uncomfortable. I looked over at Hikari, who was still soundly asleep. She was ruffling around a bit, presumably from the heat, but she was still very asleep.

Mene was trying to keep in my shade, appearing more and more exasperated. I knew I still had a good amount of magic energy left in me, but I was reluctant to use it in case we got into a battle. I looked at Mene and then at Hikari. I knew I didn't have a choice.

I pulled Hikari's trough out of my bag and pointed my quarterstaff at it, focusing all of my magical energy on it. "Water!" I called. A small mass of water materialized out of thin air, and I used my magic to gently guide it into the trough. Next, I opened my canteen. "Water!" I called again. I used my magic to guide this new mass of water into the canteen, which I then handed to Mene. I looked back at the fire. "Water!" I called for a third time, putting out the fire. I put the log back in my satchel.

I walked over to Hikari and shook her gently. She started awake. "Kweh?" she squawked, looking around nervously.

"Ssh. It's ohkay," I whispered, trying not to laugh. She and Mene had animalistic instincts at times. I found them adorable. I stroked her feathers gently. "It's alright, Hikari," I told her, "You just slept pretty late. But you need to get up now. It's almost noon, judging by the sun. I conjured some water for you." She stared at me for several seconds, presumably trying to grasp what I was telling her. She nodded after a minute and trotted over to the trough and began drinking. Mene waddled over to me and handed me the canteen.

"Do you need to feed off me this morning, kupo?" he asked kindly. I frowned. I was pretty thirsty again.

"Hopefully not, Mene," I replied softly. I walked over to Hikari's saddle bag and pulled out a few Kupo Nuts, which I gave to him. I also pulled out some Gysahl Greens, which I held out for Hikari. She nudged the trough, which I noticed was already empty. "Wow, you must've been thirsty," I said, astonished. I put the Greens in the trough and walked off to search for food.

I focused on my energy and used Scan again, closing my eyes to sense my surroundings. I started from Mene and Hikari again, moving out in the same circular pattern I'd followed before. I passed myself with the circle, and it radiated further and further outwards.

A little ways out, I found something.

It was pretty far from me. I couldn't quite make out what it was. It appeared to be a Goblin, but I couldn't be sure. It definitely had a heartbeat and was definitely big enough to feed off of. Feeling quite relieved, and still focusing on where or what it was, I took off walking towards it.

As I got closer, I realized it was indeed another Desert Goblin. I licked my lips. My mouth was watering, just thinking about it. I realized I was starving. I'd skipped breakfast. As I neared the Goblin, I became able to get a scan of her vital signs. She, like me, was terribly thirsty. She was hot and tired and weak. I smiled. This would be easy.

I got close to her as she collapsed from exhaustion. I felt a touch of pity. She was near death and abandoned by her clan. I had no idea how long she'd been wandering. She probably would've died within a few hours had I not come along anyway. I was doing her a favor, which was an unusual feeling for me with this kind of thing. I decided to respect her. I knelt down beside her and brushed her fur on her head.

"You're hurt and tired and alone," I whispered to her, stroking her gently, "I'm going to make the pain end. I'm sorry it turned out this way for you." She looked at me in wonder and groaned.

"Death?" she asked me weakly. I giggled a little at the thought. Goblins normally didn't speak English, though they could a little.

"No, I'm not Death," I told her, still stroking her head. "I'm going to try to help you." She hissed, and I drew back.

"Get off me!" she screeched, "You humans need to keep to yourselves!" I frowned in frustration. The one time I tried to help a Goblin, even though I was so thirsty, she turned on me. I kicked myself for my compassion. I should've guessed this would happen.

"If you'd just let me help-" She got to her feet.

"No! Stay away!" she yelled, cutting me off. She turned and started to walk away, stumbling weakly. I sighed. I hated how xenophobic Goblins were. I realized I didn't have much of a right to talk, given that Goblins were my usual prey, but I had wanted to help this one, despite my thirst.

I remembered my thirst. She was a good target. She was right there. She would die soon anyway. I didn't have anyone else to prey off of, anyway. I extended my fangs behind my closed lips, getting into the mindset I had as a hunter. I'd give her a reason to hate humans.

I leaped at her, grabbing her and taking her to the ground. She screeched in terror, but I barely heard her. She squirmed under me, trying to resist my attack, but I didn't let her up. I firmly used my arms and legs to pin her to the ground, and leaned over. I bit hungrily into her throat, drinking deeply. She howled in pain, but I ignored it.

After several seconds, she started to get noticeably weaker, and I drank on. Her blood tasted, like the last Desert Goblin's had: unusually delicious for a Goblin. Perhaps Desert Goblin blood was different in general. I wasn't sure I 'd ever had it specifically. I drank greedily, and soon she stopped struggling all together. I didn't let up, though. If I filled myself completely on her, I might not need to feed again until tomorrow.

I drank and drank until there was no more blood flowing from her neck. I stood up and looked down at my dress, making sure I hadn't gotten any on it. It had been a long while since I'd fed so...greedily. I'd been starving, though, and with reason. I'd only had the one Desert Goblin yesterday, and I never got a full meal when I fed off Mene or Hikari. Then, this morning, I'd skipped breakfast again. I resolved to feed more regularly.

I pulled my towel out of my satchel and wiped the blood off my mouth that I couldn't simply lick off. I wiped my face one more good time and returned it to my satchel, walking back to camp. Mene walked up to greet me as I came up.

"Did you find anything, kupo?" he asked me. I grinned with satisfaction.

"Oh, yes," I said slowly. Both Mene and Hikari were up and ready to go.

'What was it, kupo?" Mene asked me. I smiled.

"A very tasty Goblin," I said, "You guys ready to go?"