Title: Penance
Summary: Set after The Doctor somehow rescues Clara and himself from his own timestream. Guilt inspires The Doctor to begin a hopeless mission.
A/N: There is something about Doctor Who - mostly the concern that The Doctor will always regenerate and a companion is never forever that saddens me. And I've had so much fun falling in love with Clara/The Doctor that I had to write out some of the sad.
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters or this universe.
Chapter Two: The Hundreth Time.
It was an odd pasttime, even The Doctor had to admit that. But... then again, he didn't have to admit it. Not to anyone, not ever. Except, obviously for the TARDIS. The TARDIS might still be unwilling to show his Clara the nice swimming pool, but in these sad little quests the time machine was faithful. There was something fulfilling in the routine of doing this one small service and The Doctor thought it was good for both Time Lord and machine. The Doctor patted the Tardis doors with appreciation, then stepped out onto the all too familiar soil of Earth.
He could hear the ruckus already, memories danced fleetingly in his mind as he walked toward the smoke and the yelling. The TARDIS didn't fight these illegal crossings into and through his own timeline, because she knew he wasn't interested in what his past self was doing here, nor changing anything at all about his original past. No, he wasn't interested in anything but finding one seemingly insignificant player in this skirmish. And...there she was.
The Doctor saw a solitary figure stop in the middle of the street, then streak abruptly into a building. He followed her.
By the time he got to the roof, it had been done. Another of his lives had been saved and in the process, another of Clara's had been ended. The alien that had shot Clara Oswald of 1972 was already racing down the building toward the fray to try his luck again and Clara lay bleeding on the little pebbles that lined the roof.
The Doctor walked straight to her, knelt down beside her to hold her hand. The wound was too massive to even consider trying to repair the damage. Sometimes, if there was a chance, he tried. Anything if it meant another Clara would be contributing to the universe her self... even if she wasn't his Clara.
This Clara opened her eyes at his touch, and after only a few moments of processing, smiled crookedly, "Doctor."
The Doctor smiled, caressed her face with his other hand, "Beautiful Clara."
"Why are you here? You've come with the wrong face on."
The Doctor laughed, "Caught me." Then he gripped her hand against his chest, "I'm here to hold your hand, love."
"While I die?"
The Doctor inclined his head, unwilling to confirm it, "You saved my life Clara, and the world with it. Again. Do you get tired of hearing me say it?"
"It's what we do."
The Doctor bent his head low so that their foreheads touched and he could feel her breaths against his face. He was so close that he could feel her heart shutter to a halt. He wrapped his arms around her as she breathed her last breath - held her just a minute longer. Then, slowly disentangled himself and stared at the face of his Impossible Girl. He kissed her lips, then her forehead, not quite steady then - slowly - as if his body actually was over a thousand years old, he stood up.
There was a huge explosion a few blocks away, the light washed over them both and then left them again, just as quickly to the moonlight. He backed away a few steps, and finally, with courage, turned away and made his way back to the TARDIS. On the way he made sure someone would find her within the hour.
He stepped on board the TARDIS and wiped his hand over his face. It wasn't as bad as it had been. And it wasn't as bad as he knew someday it would be. Time to leave. He set course for nowhere and stood hunched over the controls while he left the past to play itself out.
"What's wrong?"
The Doctor looked up, he hadn't heard her footsteps, "Nothing. Just... doing my penance."
"Your penance for what?" Clara's smile was fond, her hair mussed from sleep.
The Doctor stood straight and faced her, the sadness in his face slowly replaced with devotion, "For my joy." The Doctor didn't give his Clara time to ask any questions about that. He took her face in his hands and kissed her and walked her backwards, back to the hall, back to their room and gently set aside the ghosts in his mind to make memories from the present.
