Seven's head was throbbing as she walked away from Chakotay; it was becoming even harder to keep her emotions in check, especially after he had interacted with Luke. She glanced anxiously down at her son; he had recently developed the habit of running away from her but at the moment he was close in at her side. She felt relief surge through her as they entered the comparative safety of Naomi's quarters but that relief was destined to be short lived as Isabel's distinctive crying reached her ears. Her sixteen month old daughter was sitting in the middle of the floor bawling her eyes out.
Seven knelt down beside her, "What happened, baby?" she asked her in concern.
Isabel turned her bright blue eyes up to her mother, tears dripping off her thick black lashes. "Mama…bunny…bunny…" she sobbed inconsolably.
Naomi appeared round the corner. "I'm sorry Seven; I couldn't find it in the things you brought over…"
"Don't worry I'll find it somewhere, she's just tired…" She turned back to her daughter."…aren't you?" Seven pushed Isabel's jet black hair out of her face and kissed her forehead before picking her up and rising off the floor. "Thank you for watching them Naomi, say thank you to Naomi Luke."
Luke grinned up at Naomi. "Thank you…you're fun."
Naomi beamed at him in pleasure. "Thank you! Oh Seven, Commander Paris told me to tell you that Isabel's cot and Luke's bed have been moved to his quarters."
"What? I thought everything was being moved to Cargo Bay 2?"
"That's what he told me to tell you." Said Naomi apologetically.
Seven sighed. "It's fine. I will attend to it." She shifted Isabel onto her other hip and looked down at Luke. "Come on, my love." The little family left and began to walk to Tom and B'Elanna's quarters. When Seven rang the bell B'Elanna answered almost immediately. "B'Elanna you don't have to keep their things, they can go in the cargo bay…"
"Seven! They can stay here; you know they're Miral's favourite playmates. I have everything all set out for them."
"But…"
"They're staying here! Look, hopefully this situation will only last one night…" B'Elanna saw Seven wince at her words and quickly changed the subject. "Come in." She led Seven to a small room where Luke's bed and Isabel's cot had been made up. "I'll leave you to put them down to sleep." Seven nodded to her and she left.
As soon as Seven set Isabel down on the floor to fish out pyjamas for her and her brother, she began to cry again. Feeling her patience begin to wear thin, Seven turned to her in exasperation. "What's wrong Isabel?"
"Bunny…bunny…" wailed Isabel insistently.
"It's lost." Luke told her solemnly. This predictably just made Isabel cry louder.
Seven turned to Luke, "Just get into your nightclothes Luke." All this crying was going beyond what she could tolerate. "I can't find it just now Isabel!" Even after almost three years as a mother she was still unable to understand a child's capacity to become attached to an inanimate object.
"No…" Isabel whimpered. Seven realised then that true to form Isabel wasn't going to sleep without her pink cuddly rabbit she had had since she was a day old. She had a bad feeling about where it was but what was she supposed to do? Go up to Chakotay and ask outright to search his quarters? Excuse me, I know you think these are your quarters but can I search what is normally our children's room for our daughter's toy? She won't go to sleep without it. Even the thought of it made her eyes burn with long suppressed tears.
Isabel suddenly stopped crying, gazing at the mother intently. "Cwy? Mama sad?"
Luke began to speak; unsettled by his mother's strange behaviour, but she silenced him with a look and wiped the single tear from her cheek in agitation. Just then the doors slid open to reveal Miral in pyjamas, holding out a cuddly lamb to Isabel. "Seven, Isabel can have Shawn for one night because Daddy says I'm a big girl now and don't need him with me every night."
Seven smiled at the little girl as she gave the toy to Isabel. "That's very kind of you Miral, Isabel say thank you to Miral."
"Tank you…" she screwed up her face as she struggled with the name. "…Miwal."
"Miral!" shouted B'Elanna, and the little girl disappeared again, the doors closing behind her.
Seven allowed herself a sigh of relief as Isabel hugged "Shawn the sheep" close into her. Luke meanwhile had not let go of his mother's distress and decided to ask her. "Mama that bad man is making you sad…"
"Don't you dare say that! He's not bad!" she snapped at him, an audible sob breaking through her defences.
Luke's face immediately crumpled and tears filled his eyes. Mama never snapped at him. Guilt rapidly replaced anger as Seven recovered from her loss of control and saw her distraught son before her. "I'm sorry, baby…come here…" Luke looked at her cautiously before seeing her pained expression and throwing himself into her arms, where he buried his head in her lap and continued to sniffle despondently. Seven stroked his face and bravely swallowed her own sobs before bending her head over his. "Luke, I love you and Isabel more than anything else in existence…" she murmured in his ear.
He looked up at her, patting her arm in an attempt to be comforting. "Mama, don't be sad."
"I'm…I'm…not sad baby…"
He looked at her sceptically in way which in any other circumstance would have been funny for its resemblance to his mother. "Promise Mama!" he said stubbornly.
She ran an affectionate hand through his hair, he certainly hadn't inherited his perceptiveness from her anyway. "I…promise." She told him gently. "I'm just tired, like the two of you are."
Isabel now spoke up. "Seepy."
Seven glanced at her yawning younger child. "You're sleepy? It's time for bed then, isn't it?"
"Yesh." She replied, her eyelids drooping.
"No! Mama, I don't want to sleep!" whined Luke.
"When two year olds start to whine, it's bedtime." Seven told him.
"I'm not two! I'm almost three!" he retorted petulantly.
"Yes, yes, almost three." Said Seven patiently as she lowered Isabel into her cot, she had had this argument with him ever since Isabel's first birthday on New Years Day.
As she tucked him in, he asked hopefully, "Mama, how many sleeps until I'm three?"
"Twenty six days, my love." She kissed him and allowed him to kiss her back. "Sleep well, my darlings." She told them as she switched the light off.
She was confronted with B'Elanna as soon as she stepped out of the room. "You're going to have to tell him Seven."
"Why?" Seven snapped defensively, feeling her eyes itch with tears again.
"Why? Seven, you were his wife for almost four years! You have two kids with him for God's sake!"
"Their father is dead! That man is from the past…they don't even know him!" Grief choked her for several seconds before she continued. "He will go back and all of this will be irrelevant…"
"That's why you have to tell him! To make sure the good things still happen!"
"No! I will not manipulate him in that manner!"
"He would understand Seven…"
Seven looked at her pleadingly, looking almost insane with grief. "Don't make this any harder…there's no reason for him to know…"
B'Elanna felt herself give in. "Alright, alright! We won't say anything! I'll tell the crew…"
Seven felt herself exhale, a huge weight coming off of her shoulders. She left without another word and ran blindly to Cargo Bay 2, where she leaned heavily against a wall, her sides heaving and head throbbing as she ached to cry. Her eyes caught the two photographs sitting on the nearest container. Her eyes were so blurred with tears she could barely make them out but she knew them by heart. On the left was their wedding photograph…when had she last smiled like that? She reached out for the photo to the right, peering at it painfully. It had been taken the day Isabel had turned three weeks old, the day both mother and daughter were released from Sickbay, she herself was lying on the biobed with a nineteen month old Luke on her lap. Chakotay sat at the foot for the bed cradling a tiny Isabel, but he was smiling up towards his wife and son. She remembered how much Chakotay had had to plead with her to smile, she had been exhausted and hated getting her photograph taken at the best of times. She had smiled when she had seen him with Isabel though and the Doctor had taken the photo at that instant. She was glad now that he had, for that was the last photograph she had of Chakotay, he had died just two days after that.
Her grip tightened on the photo as she finally lost the battle against her tears and sank to the floor, her last sentient thought before she burst into hysterical grief wracked sobs was that she had broken her promise to Luke.
A/n: I got reviews for the first chapter, please review again! I hope I made Luke and Isabel cute rather than annoying. How well did I write Seven's reaction? I'll update again soon!
