Today it actually snowed where I live, for the first time in about five years! Though it didn't last for more than five minutes, and it was more like slush than actual snow... But I think it's a good enough excuse for me to write another chapter of this :)


"Do you think May-Li will let us go outside?" Floss asks, five minutes later. We've woken up Harry and Finn; if I thought I was hyper, they've just gone completely crazy. I'm having a difficult job keeping everyone quiet.

"Who cares?" said Toni. "By the time everyone else gets up it'll be too late. Let's just GO!"

I nod, grinning, as I pull on my coat and gloves. "I've never seen snow before," I say, thoughtfully. "Not really."

"Yeah, you have!" Toni says dismissively.

"Not properly, though," I say. "None of us have, not like this. The whole ground is covered!"

That's about as much as Toni can take. With an excited yell, she runs out, followed by Harry. I follow behind slowly, my thoughts still lingering on everything that was going through my head earlier. A second later, though, Finn charges back in, grabbing my hand.

"Hurry up!" he shouts. "You have to see this, it's everywhere!"

"All right," I smile again and follow him out, shaking the thoughts out of my mind. After all, I'm here, at Ashdene Ridge, with my sister. What more could I wish for?

Finn's right. Even looking outside my bedroom window, I could see there was a lot of snow, but I hadn't seen just how heavy it was. It's literally everywhere, still magically white and pure. You always read about snow being like a dusting of icing sugar or something; this is more like the time Floss was frosting cupcakes and spilt the whole packet over the table. It must have been snowing all night, there's so much; you can't even see the path leading up to Ashdene Ridge. It's like the whole dumping ground has been transformed into one massive winter wonderland.

For a moment, I just want to stand and stare at it all; it's so breathtaking. Even as I take in the scene, though, Floss and Harry charge out in front of me, chasing each other through the garden, making muddy footprints everywhere. I'm still captivated by the view, so I don't notice Toni coming up behind me until I feel a sudden slither of cold down the back of my neck.

"Hey!" I yell; I hadn't realised how cold snow was. Without stopping to think, I gather up my own snowball, pelting it back at her. She dodges swiftly and it hits Floss in the face. She gives me one murderous look, and I dodge behind Finn quickly, even as she begins so scoop up a snowball that's about the size of a rugby ball.

It's not long before what must be about the fiercest snowball fight in history erupts. Floss teams up with Finn, while I side with Toni; Harry seems to be going along with whoever happens to be winning, and staying out of the way of the massive chunks of snow we're all pelting about. Soon we're so engrossed we lose all sense of time; I don't even notice that it's gradually getting lighter as the morning comes. I'm too busy moulding snow, pushing it tightly together to make it rock hard, as I make a supply, ready for Toni to throw. We're winning easily; Floss may be fierce, but her aim isn't great, and Finn just doesn't have the knack of making snowballs that I do.

As I stand up to hand another snowball to Toni, Floss suddenly hurls a giant chunk of snow, hitting me square in the stomach. I'm not expecting it, and it knocks the wind out of me; I fall back, and suddenly I'm lying sprawled on the ground with a scraped elbow and my stomach throbbing. Floss looks down at me, smirking. I glare back at her.

"Right; that's it!" Snarling, I spring up and start crafting a snowball especially for Floss. I wonder whether to put in some pebbles for extra strength, but decide against it; that's more Toni's style. Instead, I concentrate on grinding it together until it becomes hard as ice, and adding layer after layer until it's big enough to build a snowman with. Then I pick it up and edge over to where she's chasing Harry.

"Hey, Floss?" I call casually, trying to hide the slight venom in my voice. While this is all fun and games, a tiny part of me sort of resents Floss. I guess I'm being petty; she can be fun to hang out with and Toni likes her well enough... I suppose that's the problem, though. I've never had to share Toni with anyone; but now she always seems to get on great with Floss, and I'm not sure I like it. And while Floss is nice enough to Toni, sometimes I get the feeling that she only puts up with me because I'm Toni's sister. It's not that she's ever mean, exactly. It's just the way she's always having these little digs at me, like now.

Well, I've had enough. The moment Floss turns round I grab my deadly snowball and get ready to hurl at her. I hold it above my shoulder like we learnt to do with the shot-puts at school, and throw it in front of me, about to let it go and send it flying towards Floss. I'm poised, ready, on one leg... which is when a sudden gust of wind comes up behind me, catching me off balance. Not again.

I try to put out my hands to steady myself as I fall; but in that instant, I let go of the snowball. My arms flail uselessly in mid-air, while the killer snowball smashes to the ground just as I fall flat on my face on top of it.

"No way!" Floss jeers. "Only you could fall face first in your own snowball... that was just brilliant. Please say someone filmed that!"

I lie on the ground, cold and humiliated. I really did land with my face right in the middle of my snowball, and every inch of me is aching and frozen. I'm too stunned to even get up for a moment, but through the ringing of my ears I can hear my twin start to join in the laughter.

"Honestly, Billie, you're such an idiot sometimes!" she says, pulling me up.

"Thanks a bunch!" I scowl, brushing snow off my face. Even then, the cold still lingers; and my chin feels like it's about to fall off. Honestly, though, it's my pride that's hurt most. I've totally made a fool of myself in front of Floss, and even my own sister is laughing at me. Feeling my eyes begin to water, I try hard to calm myself down; the last thing I need is to start blubbing now. Think of something funny...

But Toni knows me too well, and is quick to notice the tell-tale trembling of my lower lip.

"Hey, come on, you're not going to cry now, are you?" she says. "I didn't mean to laugh. You looked pretty funny falling over like that, that's all."

"Well, I didn't find it funny!" I retort. "My whole face hurts, and I'm freezing. You're supposed to be on my side, you could have helped me. But all you did was stand there having a laugh with Floss!"

"Look, I said I'm sorry!" Toni snaps, irritated again. "Look, let's do something else now, yeah? We could build a snowman?"

I nod reluctantly, and she calls Floss and the others over. "Harry and Finn, you make the body, Floss and I will make the head." She turns to me. "You can make the face. How about you see if there's any carrots in the kitchen?"

I nod again. We're about to get to work when suddenly the front door opens.

"And what do you lot think you're doing?"

We jump, and turn round, seeing May-Li staring at us.

"We were just playing," Toni says meekly.

"Yeah," Floss says, nodding. "We've never seen snow before."

"That may be, but do you know what time it is?" May-Li demands. "It's still practically dark, for goodness sake! And you know you're supposed to ask us for permission before you go outside!"

"Sorry," I say, guiltily; it was sort of my idea, after all. "It just looked really fun..."

"And what's happened to you?" she demands, looking at me for the first time. "See, this is why you ask for permission! Come on, Billie, let's get you inside. You're shivering, and your whole chin is bleeding. That means you lot, too," she says, motioning us all to follow her back in.

"We can go out again later, though, can't we?" Harry asks.

"Well, that depends," May-Li says. "It is a school day, remember?"

"Oh, yeah! I'd completely forgotten that!" I say, groaning. "Aren't we late by now, though?"

"Well, you would be," May-Li agrees. "Only they just phoned. All the schools are closed."

"Really?" Toni cheers. "Yes!" She grabs Floss, ready to charge out into the snow again, but May-Li stops her.

"Did you not listen to anything I said?" she asks. "Okay, I might let you go out again later... after you've got warmed off."

We nod reluctantly, following her back into the house. Everyone else is still in that hyper, excited mood, and I try to force myself to cheer up. It's not every day it snows, after all. But I'm still freezing and sore from falling, and as I watch Floss and Toni chatting together I feel another little stab of jealousy. Even snow days seemed to be tarnished for me, these days. As we walk through to the kitchen, where all the older kids are sitting in their dressing gowns, with warm mugs of hot chocolate waiting for us, I'm suddenly reminded again that it's almost christmas. The first christmas without my family.

At least I'm not alone. The good thing about being a twin is that I always have someone. I worry sometimes where I'd be if I didn't have Toni; I've never been great at making friends, and I think I'd be quite shy if it was just me. So having a twin is a relief; an insurance that I'll never be alone. And if it wasn't for her, I don't know how I'd get through this christmas. It's going to be difficult for me as it is; I guess it always is, when you're in care.

I suppose that's why I've been getting so jealous of Floss. Toni's my twin sister; and now, she's the only family I've got. So I guess that's why I get so paranoid about losing her to Floss. Because that's the thing about being in care; you have to hang on to anyone you've got. And if I didn't have Toni, I'd be all alone.


Okay, this chapter has ended up massive! I always seem to write loads these days. Sorry if this story is kind of slow starting, I wanted to properly describe Billie's emotions and everything that's going through her head. But things will get more interesting soon, I promise.