Ya'll know the drill. It ain't mine. I'm just rollin' in the hay someone else made while the sun was shining! (Have I ever mentioned I love mixed metaphors? No? They're really enjoyably tacky. You should try it sometime!) Remember to visit my profile page for links to the song videos.


|IV – Drunk Dialling| |Charlie & Billy|
Artist: Hank Williams Jr.
Song: Forged by Fire (Darryl Burgess, Ron Hellard © 2009)

It was hard for him to get out of bed
When the phone rang, sleep-eyed she said
Charlie's drunk again
Why don't you just let it ring
Through the years he'd always picked it up
For the guy who came back and saved his butt
What they have in common is a brotherhood
So few could understand

He was headed home ready to unwind
Charlie called can you help me one more time
He said Chuck, I'll be there on the double
For a brother, it's no trouble

Sarah watches her husband on the phone. It's 2am. He's trying to talk quietly so he doesn't wake the twins.

"I know it's Bella's first birthday, Charlie … Yeah, I'm sorry, too buddy. No one should miss that … You're doing ok though."

Sarah knows this is a lie. Charlie is keeping Rainier's in business. But Charlie is too drunk to know it's a lie which is what counts.

"Listen man, you didn't do anything wrong. She left. That's what flighty women do. They leave."

… (Sarah can hear Charlie's slurred, protesting ramble down the phone from her side of the bed.)

"No, I'm not saying you're better off without her. I'm saying she isn't here anymore so you've gotta live life like this now."

"Yeah, you can live … Don't be stupid, of course you can live."

I'd be easier for Charlie to live without the beer though, Sarah thinks sleepily.

"I know buddy, I know. That part really is shit. But when she's old enough we'll work on a way for you to see her … I'll talk to Sarah, she's good with ideas about this kind of thing."

Sarah feels Billy reach across the bed and pat her back. She can't imagine what it'd be like to have the twins taken from her, as much trouble as they can be at times. This is the main reason Charlie's intoxicated nocturnal phone calls don't bother her. Billy voices her thought in response to something Charlie says.

"It's ok. Sarah doesn't mind … No, I don't mind either. I know you'd do it for me if the shoe was on the other foot."

"Ok, buddy. You drink some water and hit the sack. I'll call you tomorrow."

"Yeah. You too. Night."

Billy hangs up and rolls over to look at his wife. He says nothing but pulls her to him and kisses her gently.

"Thank you," he whispers finally. "Thank you for being here."

A/N – Ah, the first of the Hank Jr. songs! I was originally only going to do one song per artist in keeping with the theme of variability in these drabbles, but Hank Jr.'s done so much awesome stuff that fits perfectly. So you'll just have to put up with a fair bit of him! He's an interesting character. Son of the famous Hank Williams, (a man who, in his 29 short years on this planet, changed country music forever) Hank Jr. was only four when his father died. By the age of 8 he was on stage performing his father's songs. Like his father, by the time he was in his mid-twenties he was heavily dependent on drugs and alcohol. Just as he was starting to get his life and career together by playing southern rock, Willams Jr. suffered a terrible mountain climbing accident which crushed his skull. Two years later, after he'd learned to walk, talk and sing again, he was back in the recording studio. He now sports a beard and performs in sunglasses and a hat to hide the scars from his accident. Williams Jr.'s son Hank Williams III is also a well-known honky-tonk country, punk and metal musician.


|V – A Bouncing Baby Boy| |Sarah & Billy|
Artist: Anne Murray
Song: Danny's Song (Kenny Loggins © 1971)

People smile and tell me I'm the lucky one
And we've just begun, I think I'm gonna have a son
He will be like you and me, as free as a dove
Conceived in love, the sun is gonna shine above

And even though we ain't got money
I'm so in love with ya honey
Everything bring a chain of love
And in the mornin' when I rise
Bring a tear of joy to my eyes
And tell me everything's gonna be all right

The doctor wiped some ultrasound gel across Sarah's trim, bronze tummy.

She shivered slightly at the cold and at the thought that she'd soon be a balloon again. Although hopefully this time not as voluminous a balloon as she had been with the twins. Surely the odds of not having a second set of twins were in her favour?

"There you are Sarah, a nice healthy baby. Looks to me like you're about twelve weeks along. Does that seem right?"

"Yes, definitely, Dr Robinson." Sarah knew without an ounce of doubt when she'd conceived this baby. Billy had come home from a Sunday fishing trip, taken the girls around to the Clearwaters to see Leah, and then ravaged Sarah on their veranda. And in the kitchen. Followed by their bed, then the living room.

She wasn't sure what had spurred his ardour – they had talked about having another child several times but money was tight so they never agreed on it. Hell, money was always tight, but Sarah had stopped taking the pill in case Billy relented. He'd always used condoms until that Sunday afternoon in mid-March.

Over supper, their favourite shared guilty pleasure of tinned spaghetti, she'd quietly asked him, once she found the words, why now? Billy'd answered, obliquely, by saying Charlie came fishing. Sarah thought about this for a moment and then realised it was the first time in a year that the poor man had agreed to go fishing with Billy and Harry again. A year since his wife had left him and taken that sweet little baby girl with her.

Billy'd furthered his explanation. "Charlie is sobering up and sort of crawling out of his shell. At least, me and Harry are still hauling on him and he's finally given in enough to let us pull him out occasionally." Sarah's husband paused and forked up some more mushy noodles and iridescent red sauce.

"But him being alone now and everything, well, it made me realise, what the hell point is there in life if you don't have a family you love?"

Sarah throat was too tight for her to answer with anything more than a squeeze of Billy's broad hand. Sure, money was always going to be short but she had Billy. And she fucking loved Billy Black. Later that evening when she'd picked the twins up from the Clearwaters, Sue gave her a knowing smile.

The doctor was giving Sarah the same knowing smile now as he wiped her tummy off. "It's just one this time. I'll bet that's a relief after those girls of yours," he joked gently.

Sarah looked a little sheepish. Lucille, Dr Robinson's receptionist, had been giving her the stink eye since last year when Rachel had painted the waiting area chairs with blueberry yogurt while Sarah had taken Rebecca to the toilet.

"I-" she started.

"You know what one of the Crowley kids did?" The doctor cut her off and continued before she could answer. "He fed his bologna sandwich to the jade plant on the front desk. We're still picking soil out of the carpet. And thinking about asking parents not to bring food with their kids anymore!" Then he was serious, back to business after kindly pointing out that all toddlers have their moments. "I'd like you to come back in two months for your mid-pregnancy scan. Lucille will organise an appointment for you. Between now and then, make sure you get as much rest as those girls will allow."

Billy was ecstatic. He put the fuzzy black and white picture on the fridge along with the twins' finger paintings. The girls didn't understand why their mother had a thing that looked like a white alien in her belly. Who would want to swallow something that ugly?

xxx

Three weeks later Charlie came over. Billy was right, he was less of an hermit crab this spring. Except Billy hadn't yet told him about the baby. Charlie missed his daughter so desperately that Billy hadn't the heart to say anything. Until Charlie got up to get another round of beers out of the Blacks' fridge and saw the grainy ultrasound picture and froze. The stiff smile he pasted on his face slipped off too quickly after he said his congratulations. Charlie himself soon slipped out the front door, leaving Harry and Billy to finish watching the Mariners lose a preseason game.

That night in bed Billy was thankful for the dip his wife made in the mattress next to him. He patted Sarah's emerging bump, saying "I wonder if he'll like fishing? I hope he's sweet like you and doesn't have my short fuse."

"She might like fishing, you never know," Sarah teased. "But the fire in you – any child of yours is always going to have that."

There was a serious moment; they regarded each other deeply, Sarah pressing her hand against his above the baby. Then Billy barked out a laugh and said "You think so? I hope not. I was such a little shit as a kid and I was really hoping for a nice quite baby this time after the twins."

"You, misbehave? Never, Mr. Black!"

"Try telling that to the family dog. I strapped him to a tricycle once at the beach. He nearly drowned in the surf trying to get away from me. We tried to teach him to tackle like an NFL player too. Probably had less success with that than with operation sled-dog." Billy was chuckling, lost in the memories of his childhood misadventures.

"Yeah, but the time you stuffed him in a duffel bag and took him up a pine into your tree house really took the cake didn't it?"

"How'd you know about that, Mrs Black?" Billy asked with round eyes. He'd never told his wife about that incident. Mostly because it ended with Old Quil, who'd been walking past while Billy lowered the dog down on a rope harness, whaling him for being a 'warped, cauliflower-brained, monkey who was too dumb to know his left ball from his right elbow or that dogs belonged on the ground.'

"Old Quil's got a long memory," Sarah replied smugly.

"It was Young Quil's idea anyway," Billy said petulantly. "The damned dog was fine on the way up. How was I supposed to know he wouldn't want to get in the bag for the return trip out of the tree? And then when I did squish him in and started climbing out, he looked down and panicked. Everyone knows you're not supposed to do that! Stupid mutt scratched the hell out of my shoulders so lowering him on a rope was our only option."

"I think we have plenty to look forward to," Sarah answered her husband dryly.

xxx

"Would you like to know the baby's sex?" Dr. Robinson asked Sarah when she was back on his table, rounding tummy again covered in chilly gunk.

"Sure, but I already know it's a boy," she beamed up at him. She couldn't tell him how she knew, she just did. Besides, in the last two months, Billy had done nothing but rub her belly and tell it tribal stories at night. Sarah knew the stories Billy had been whispering were those meant only for the ears of the tribe's men. If anyone could sense these things, it was Billy.

"Indeed. Woman's intuition is correct and once again steals modern medicine's thunder," the doctor joked. "It is a boy."

The girls were indifferent. All they could tell from the picture was the thing called 'brother' was now a bigger alien. No one wanted an alien, especially not them. They wanted new butterfly stickers for their collection. Or new scented markers. Leah had those but she wouldn't share.

Billy, on the other had, was, if possible, more ecstatic over this picture than the last. He painted the nursery blue, put up Thomas the Tank Engine pictures and began carving a toy truck. When that was finished he carved a wolf. "Just in case," he said. "Just in case the boy is anything like me and has the fire inside."

Artist: Brad Paisley
Song: Anything Like Me (Paisley, Chris DuBois, Dave Turnbull © 2009)

I started wondering who he was going to be
And I thought heaven help us if he's anything like me

He'll probably climb a tree too tall and ride his bike too fast
End up every summer wearin' something in a cast
He's gonna throw a ball and break some glass
In a window down the street

He's gonna get in trouble, oh, he's gonna get in fights
I'm gonna lose my temper and some sleep
It's safe to say that I'm gonna get my payback
If he's anything like me

A/N – Did 'Oh, I hadn't heard the great news. A bouncing baby boy, huh? Shoulda brought some blue balloons.' spring to mind for anyone else? Ick, I had to go get Breaking Fail off my bookshelf and double check that line! 'Scuse me while I go bleach my hands/brain now... Not to worry, Jake makes an appearance soon enough.

Sorry this was so long. I originally wrote it where everything happened at the one scan – dating conception and sexing the baby. Then I realised it doesn't work like that. Meh, what do I know about babies? (Nada, obviously!) In my defence, I was an equine vet nurse, not a human one. Ask me about scanning mares or foals being born and I can 'splain that easily. Homo sapiens not so much! Besides, I can't help myself when I start writing Billy and Sarah. I get caught up in it…

I couldn't just pick one song either. Danny's Song was written for Loggin's brother Danny on the birth of his son Colin. The Loggins and Messina recording wasn't a hit but the song's been covered many times since then. I wanted to use the Beccy Cole version here. Beccy's an Australian country singer and always puts on a great live show. Alas, there was no vid for it so I had to go with the 1972 Anne Murray classic instead. I guess that's ok, Anne was only the first female Canadian solo artist to go #1 on the US charts! I couldn't go past Brad Paisley's song for Billy's POV either. So there you have it.


|VI – Sisters| |Rachel & Rebecca|
Artist: Sara Storer
Song: Long Live the Girls (Storer © 2007)

Long live the girls, rubber bands and sun-kissed curls
Sweet tears and hand-me-down dresses,
What a year for dandelion wishes
Long live the girls, maybe forever happy
Long live the girls, long live the girls

Jewels and clothes and songs and secrets all 'bout love
Take a hand if one girl falls behind
You're growing up too soon stop hiding in your room
Every heartache you feel goes in time
Darlin' don't cry he's only a boy, a silly silly boy

"I get the pink one, you get the purple one, Bec."

"Ok. That leaves green, blue, red and yellow," Rebecca replies to her sister.

"Red for Leah. That's easy," Rachel states.

Rebecca looks thoughtful. "Will she wear it though?"

"Probably not. Doesn't matter though, everyone else will so it'll still feel like a birthday. Yellow for Seth?"

"No," Rebecca replies. "Yellow for Jake." She puts the party hat into a pile with hers and Rachel's.

"That leaves us with blue and green." Rachel holds up a hat in each hand, dangling them by their elastic strings.

"Perfect for Bella and Seth," finishes Rebecca.

xxx

There are six paper grab bags for this party, containing amongst other things, the carefully allocated hats. The girls will have another party on their actual birthday next month with all their school friends but since Bella's only here for a week in June, they get two parties. And two cakes. This suits them perfectly.

Sarah's using this party as a dry run to bake a pink strawberry-flavoured cake in the shape of a number seven. If it doesn't work, the family won't mind and she'll have some time to figure out how to improve before she hosts fifteen screaming seven-year-old girls.

xxx

They're all in the backyard now to play and burn off the strawberry cake. With its sparklers instead of candles and copious quantities of frosting, it was a hit.

"Pretty. Blue for Bwella" says Jake as he lifts her cone-shaped hat off her head and lets it snap back down. Bella giggles.

Seth toddles over to where Bella and Jake are sitting, his green party hat over one ear, pink icing in the other. Bella gently takes his hat off to stop the elastic cutting into his chin and cheek.

"See Jake," she says and points at the yellow cone near his feet. "My blue hat plus your yellow hat make Seth's green hat." Bella has learned about primary colours in kindergarten and is eager to share.

Jake, however, is far more intent on the icing in Seth's ear. Grabbing the younger boy, he scrapes the frosting out with a finger he then licks clean. Seth squirms and squeaks but Jake pins him down and finishes scrubbing out his ear. This exceeds the toddler's tolerance and he begins to wail loudly.

Leah comes barrelling over from the corner of the yard where she and the twins have been tossing and twirling batons with ribbons. Reaching the picnic blanket where the three youngest children are sitting, she scoops her brother onto her hip. She may only be seven, but she's strong and she scolds Jake with a stern "Leave him!"

Seth reaches down to Bella, who, not knowing what to do, hands up his green hat, the point of which goes directly into his mouth. Leah walks away with her brother and plops a snivelling Seth down in front of Rebecca and Rachel.

"Here baby, you have this." Rebecca slips her purple hat onto Seth's head with a kiss while shooting Jake a dirty look.

"Mine too, it keeps slipping into my eyes when I'm looking up to catch the baton," says Rachel, fitting her hat onto the back of Seth's head. He gurgles happily now and keeps chewing his soggy green cardboard.

Plucking her red hat out off the branch she'd hung it on, Leah fastens it over Seth's forehead. The girls regard him, a tiny, multicoloured triceratops sitting on his diapered bottom. They explode with giggles, grab their shiny batons and skip and scamper around him, trailing ribbons and streamers like a Maypole.

Sarah hears the laughter and looks out. She sees Bella and Jake watching the spectacle from their picnic blanket. Then Bella puts both the yellow and blue paper hats on Jake's head, he grabs her hand and they scurry over to join the squealing circle of girls around Seth.

She calls to Sue in the living room where she's wiping pink frosting off the furniture. The two women step outside to watch their kids play.

"Who turned the boys into hat racks?" yells Sue.

"We did," shriek back Rachel, Rebecca, Leah and Bella, breathless.

"Gii-irls!" Sue and Sarah cry out together in the same disapproving tone of voice. Looking at each other, they burst out laughing. Sarah jumps off the back porch, "Come on, the clean up can wait." She holds out a hand to Sue and the mothers run over to join their daughters' frolic.

A/N – Sara Storer's an Aussie. This makes me smile. Like so : )


|VII – Gone| |Billy|
Artist: Wayne Cochran and the C.C. Riders
Song: Last Kiss (Cochrane, Joe Carpenter, Randall Hoyal & Bobby McGlon © 1961)

We hadn't driven very far
There in the road, up straight ahead
A car was stalled, the engine was dead
I couldn't stop, so I swerved to the right
I'll never forget the sound that night
The screamin' tires, the bustin' glass

When I woke up, the rain was pourin' down
There were people standing all around
Something warm rollin' through my eyes
But somehow I found my baby that night
I lifted her head, she looked at me and said
"Hold me darling just a little while."
I held her close, I kissed her our last kiss
I found the love that I knew I would miss
But now she's gone, even though I hold her tight
I lost my love, my life that night.

All I can hear is snuffling. That choked noise people make when they try not to cry loudly. I hate this charade, it's worse than if everyone'd just bawl their eyes out.

Which is what I did when I realised I'd be burying my wife after the car accident.

I don't know why they call them car 'accidents'. This wasn't a simple accident. It was a fucking tragic disaster. I guess 'car disaster' doesn't sound so tidy and catchy.

There's nothing neat and tidy about any of this though. It's so, so fucking wrong in so many ways. Sarah was good and whole, there was no reason for her to go. I'm the one with god-damned diabetes. She was supposed to put me in the ground, for Christ's sake!

Burying my wife today is bad enough, but burying my children's mother is… I don't have words for it.

I guess that's maybe why people are snuffling instead of crying: to protect the kids. As if you can. As if you can protect anyone. We all die. It's just a matter of when.

A/N – Sorry. It had to happen :(

Raise your hands if you were surprised that Pearl Jam did not write this track? While I love Eddie Vedder to pieces and think he has possibly the sexiest voice of any man alive (Note: I say alive. Johnny Cash'd win hands down if he wasn't dead!) for some reason I felt the need to go with the much less famous original. Pearl Jam and their sexy-voiced lead singer have been just one of several bands to cover the song. It was written based on fact – Cochrane lived near a highway where a few fatalities had occurred. Finally, if you're up for a laugh after the heartfail of Sarah's death, visit Wayne Cochrane's website. His gravity- and colour-defying hair will surely make you smile!