Chapter 2

Don't


My hands clamped around the metal edges of the album, as I stared at the three empty spaces where he should have been. The three memories… he took away from me.

With a shaking finger, I reached up to trace the blank skin of the album, imagining his face forming around my touch.

As my eyes closed gently, shielding my pain from the rest of the world, a single tear slipped under my lashes, trailing down my cheek, before finally falling on the place where his face should have been.

After so many years… why now?

"Bella?" Jacob's voice called softly from behind the bathroom door, and I quickly stashed the album in the cupboard, wiping away the tears from under my eyes.

"Yeah…"

"Can I come in?"

I opened the latch of the door, slowly meeting his gaze as his breath hitched in the back of his throat. He saw how bloodshot my eyes were, he saw the despair, and the desolation behind them… he saw, and understood everything.

Don't let me hurt you.

"I-I'm sorry," I choked, before my hands reached for him desperately, clinging to his shirt just to feel the warmth, and reassurance burning under his touch.

His hands wrapped around my back, his fingers running gently through my hair as he pressed his cheek against the top of my head. "There's nothing to be sorry about."

"There's everything," I whispered, my hands tightening around the lapel of his jacket.

He just let me cling desperately to him, holding me tightly against his chest as he tried to hide his own rising fears. "Bella..." he murmured into my hair, his voice strained, "I need to know... how much this changes."

I drew back from him, "Changes?"

He bit down on his lip, trying to fight away the tears as he tore his eyes from my gaze. "A-Are… Are you going to leave me?"

"No."

His gaze flashed back towards mine, weakening as he saw my expression, "What do you mean by that?"

"I need to talk to him Jake," my voice cracked, my mind whirling with the thought of seeing him again. I was going to get married… and I had Jake.

I didn't need him.

"You don't need to talk to him at all," the bitterness was back in his voice, "He left you, and he caused you so much pain," his eyes burned with anguish, "and the day he decides to return…"

is the day I've finally moved on, and chosen you.

"He was my life Jake."

"Was your life!"

"Please," I begged pathetically, as I buried my head in his shoulder.

"Bella…"

I lifted my head up slightly, my eyes focusing on his, "When I was getting ready with my mom, all I could think about was him. I didn't want to Jake – but, I loved him so… desperately, so… intensely, and that kind of love doesn't just disappear!"

His own eyes closed, his jaw tense and stiff with emotion.

"Please," I whispered, "Just give me a chance to say goodbye."

His eyes snapped open, glaring bitterly into mine, "Say goodbye to who?"

"To me," a voice called gently from behind us, and I whirled around in his arms, my gaze fixing on Edward's.

My heart soared inside my chest, just with sheer elation at seeing him again. My fingers flinched away from Jake suddenly, longing for a colder… smoother skin to touch.

I heard Jake sigh above me, his arms tightening around me, and then relaxing as he let me go from his arms. His eyes locked with mine one final time, deploring me to see the devotion behind his gaze, "I love you," he breathed, stroking my cheek once, before turning and walking out of the door.

I couldn't do this.

My breath caught in the back of my throat as the door swung shut, leaving me alone with Edward, my heartbeat thudding erratically under my chest, as I turned slowly to face him.

"Why did you come?"

My gaze flashed up to his, my bottom lip shaking as I saw the passion, and the desperation sparkling behind his golden eyes.

I'd missed that.

He took a step towards me, and then another, and another, until he was standing barely inches away from me. "I'm sorry," he choked hopelessly, his voice barely louder than a whisper, "I'll go now."

I turned my hard, cold gaze towards him, "Don't you dare think about leaving again."

"How can I stay?"

"How can you leave?" I demanded, reaching to grab his wrist in some vain effort to make him stay. He shivered at my touch, the gold colour in his eyes disappearing as it slowly turned black.

"I just… wanted to see you happy, one last time."

"I was happy."

"Before I arrived."

"Before you left!"

He flinched away from me, sliding his wrist out of my hand, only for me to cling desperately on to it again.

"And now… I have Jake."

And you have the distractions you claimed existed… and whatever other reasons you left me for.

"I lied," he said gently, taking my other hand in his, "I just want you to know… before I go, because I am going Bella."

I shivered as he said my name.

"I can't stay. You and I both know that."

"B-But… I just got you back," I whispered, as his finger traced the veins of my hand.

Let him go.

"Please tell me you're happy."

Please don't be listening Jake.

"I can never be fully happy if I'm not with you."

He winced, his hands leaving mine so suddenly that I didn't have time to reach for him, "I should never have come. Forget that I ever did… please Bella."

He turned towards the door, still not moving.

"So, that's it?"

His head hung, resigned.

"You're just going to leave me again? Like you did two years ago? You're going to promise me everything, and then break it all just because you have the power to do so…"

"That was never why I left you," he growled, suddenly turning back to face me. "Never," his hands reached out to grasp mine, and I gave them to him, "I wanted you to be safe and happy. I wanted you to live the life you were supposed to live… without me holding you back."

"You didn't-"

"I'm not human Bella!" he roared, his voice cracking at the end as his chest heaved up at down with despair, "I left you, because I loved you."

His eyes, now burning with such an intense passion, locked on mine, "I thought that by leaving I would make you happier… and now, I've managed to hurt you in more ways than I thought possible. You will be happy with Jake," he said monotonously, almost as if he were trying to convince himself, "and you'll be able to live a full, human life… without me."

I knew it was going to hurt me, but at this moment, I didn't care. I just reached up, and slapped him.

He could have seen the gesture… he could have had time to back away, or to duck or even to grasp my wrist before it connected with his face; but he didn't even try to stop me.

"I waited for you," I seethed, trying to ignore the tingling feeling in my palm, "Two whole years of my life… I waited. Jake was the one that picked me back up again, Jake was the one that helped me to trust, and to love. I love him Edward… truly I do. But it can never be enough."

I let out a shaky breath, my hands clenching into fists, "You're a fool Edward Cullen."

And then I turned my eyes away from my heart, my soul, and my life.

"You say you didn't want to hurt me, well… you lied; again. You knew I was getting married today, and yet, you still came."

"Just to see you one last time… to see that you were happy, and that you'd moved on."

"I haven't."

"Bella-"

"I won't," I hissed, "Ever."

"Please-"

"Although, according to you… I have the memory of a sieve. That my memories would fade easily over time," my eyes flashed towards his, a cruel, bitter smile flashing across my face, "Did you honestly believe that I could forget you so quickly?"

"Yes."

"I loved you."

"Loved?"

I looked up at him defiantly, my eyes raking over his bedraggled clothing, his wild, gaunt expression, and his wet, wind-swept hair. I left his eyes until last, feeling my resistance melt into a small puddle by my feet. "Love," I amended, "Present tense…" I trailed off, smiling sadly, "I guess I lie too."

I shook my head, the smile slipping off my face as I realised something.

Edward wanted me.

Without a second thought, my hand whirled around to his, fisting in his jumper as I yanked him closer towards me. I crashed my lips against his, no longer caring about the fact that he wasn't human.

All I needed was him.

I loved him.

He gasped wildly into my mouth, his hands finding my waist as he pulled me closer towards him, lifting me up slightly as his lips attacked mine with the same passion and hunger. His hands wove into my hair, and he lifted me up again, hitching a leg around his hip.

His boundaries were gone.

"Bella," he moaned softly, running his tongue slowly along my trembling bottom lip, "Bella…"

What are you doing?

"E-Edward-"

You're at your own wedding, and you're kissing another man.

His lips cut off my speech, his hands clutching the skirts of my wedding dress, and I felt the tears welling up in my eyes.

Oh God…

Jake.


AN - Yes, I have decided to continue this story, AND I have a plotline! The kiss was inspired by The Notebook MTV Best Kiss Award. [If you haven't seen it, youtube it]... and you'll understand what I was trying to show.


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