"Brian? If you don't get going right now, she's going to miss the bus!" Justin wiped his hands on a paint-stained rag before placing his brush down temporarily. This was the third time this morning he had reminded his husband that their daughter had to be out at the end of the driveway by 7:30 and so far there didn't seem to be any movement from downstairs; the only sound he could hear was the tick-tick-tick of the large grandfather clock on the second floor, counting off the seconds before the bus was due. "Brian? Did you hear me?" he called out a little louder now.
Exasperated when he didn't receive a response after a few seconds, he walked down the steps of his attic studio in search of father and daughter. His heart suddenly began to hammer in his throat when he distinctly heard Issy saying from somewhere below, "Daddy…I can't breathe!" Can't breathe? He had warned Brian about giving their daughter toys that had small parts in them; in fact, he had just confiscated a paper and coins money set Issy had been playing with last night while she had been pretending to go grocery shopping. Had she somehow gotten into it again this morning and swallowed one of the hard, plastic coins? Horrible thoughts of her daughter gasping for breath and turning blue invaded his thoughts as he headed recklessly toward the second-floor landing.
"Brian!" He shouted frantically, his voice cracking with fear as he ran down the next set of steps two at a time, rushing toward the sound of his daughter's voice. "Issy! Brian!" he cried out. "Where ARE you? ANSWER ME!" Please, God….
It seemed like an eternity passed before he finally heard Brian's voice. "Keep your smock on, Sunshine, we're down here," was his nonchalant reply. Justin continued to hurry down the steps as fast as he could, wondering what was happening; he was somewhat bewildered by Brian's seemingly unconcerned tone of voice. Should he be calling 911? What the fuck was going on? How could Brian be so casual about their daughter choking?
He grabbed the banister's pillar to catch himself at the bottom of the elaborate, curved staircase; as he immediately slid on his stockinged feet and twisted to the right to start down the hallway toward the foyer, he stopped at the sight he saw several feet in front of him. There, standing just inside the entrance door, was his blonde-haired little girl wearing a pink backpack, her blue eyes flashing in annoyance as her bottom lip stuck out in displeasure. Brian was kneeling behind her, cursing and muttering to himself as he tried unsuccessfully to loosen the black, nylon straps hopelessly twisted on her back. "It's still too tight, Daddy!" she reported, slightly stomping her foot. "We're going to miss the bus! We have to go now‼"
"Well, if it hadn't taken us fifteen minutes to brush your hair earlier, Princess, we'd still be on time," he heard Brian grunt in reply.
Justin let out an enormous breath of relief as he walked up to father and daughter. If he hadn't been terrified out of his fucking mind just a few seconds earlier, he would have laughed at the sight. It would still be a few minutes before his heart would start beating normally again, but at least he knew things were all right now. He plastered on a look of I knew it all the time before he stopped to stare in interest at Brian's inability to solve their daughter's dilemma.
Brian glared up at him in response. "Well, are you just going to stand there, or are you going to help me get these fu…..these straps loosened? This is the biggest crock of sh…..This is the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen!" he fumed. "They should give you instruction manuals for these things! I assembled her BIKE faster than THIS‼" he groused.
Justin pursed his lips tightly together for a moment, trying hard not to laugh in relief at Brian's queen out before he walked over and knelt down next to him. "Don't worry, Honey," he told their daughter. "I'll help Daddy get them fixed for you. I'm ambidextrous," he proudly announced to her as Brian gave him a look of disgust.
Issy twisted her face in puzzlement, trying briefly to figure out just what that word meant; by the look on her other father's face, he apparently knew, but at the moment there were more important matters to take care of as far as she was concerned. "Hurry, Papa!" she entreated. "I don't wanna miss my ride!"
"Hmphff!" Brian snorted. "Like father, like daughter," he commented dryly; he watched in amazement as Justin adeptly pulled each strap up to loosen it before rethreading them back through the buckle and folding them under for added safety. "How do you DO that?" he wondered as Justin merely shrugged in reply.
"Just keep it up with those types of comments, Dad," Justin whispered, "And your ride will be out of commission tonight." Brian grinned back at him and raised his eyebrows innocently as he curled his lips under, knowing full well that his husband wouldn't dare miss their nightly ritual of fucking and making love after their daughter's bedtime tonight. Who would have thought they would have ever had to fucking schedule it, anyway?, he thought, shaking his head in amazement over how things had turned upside when this miniature Justin look-alike had entered their lives five years ago….He couldn't imagine it any other way, now, though, as he looked down tenderly at his daughter, who was growing more and more impatient by the second to get started on her grand adventure.
Justin stood up and turned Issy around by her shoulders to place a kiss on her forehead. "All set, sweetheart – you've still got time; don't worry." He marveled at Brian's ability to tame her long, thick blond hair that he had managed to gather at the back of her head with an elastic band; two Tinkerbell barrettes were resting on either side of her head to hold back her bangs that always threatened to hide her expressive, blue eyes. She was wearing pink and white gym shoes, blue jeans with rhinestones on the pockets, and a long-sleeved, pink and silver t-shirt that proudly announced "Daddy's Princess" to the rest of the world.
"You look beautiful, Baby," Justin told her, smiling as the little girl beamed back at him. "How about a hug before you leave? You're going to have such a great time at school! Did you remember your crayons and paper?"
She nodded at her father as she reached her hands up to him. He scooped her up into his arms for a bear hug briefly before placing her back down at his feet. "I want to hear all about your day when you get home, okay? I'll meet you at the end of the driveway after school and you can tell me all about it." Justin was so delighted that he could work out of his attic studio and be there when their daughter returned from school; he secretly knew that Brian wouldn't have exactly rebelled at having the same luxury with her, too, but his advertising business required him to make regular sojourns into Pittsburgh to meet with clients. One advantage of owning his business, though, was that he could wait with their daughter for her bus at the end of the driveway each day before he drove to work.
Brian watched the scene between the father and daughter bookends; the same color hair, same smile, same blue eyes. He felt doubly blessed at that moment to have two such wonderful humans in his life, but some days he wished he had a manual to use where their daughter was concerned. He hadn't needed one with Gus since Lindsey and Mel had possession of him most of the time – but with Issy, everything was new to him, even figuring out how to fasten her fucking backpack. Thank goodness Justin was around to help figure these complicated matters out.
He focused his attention back to Justin as he heard him ask, "Have you got your car keys ready? You've got about five minutes to get her out to the end of the driveway before the bus comes."
He reached in his pocket to pull out his key fob and dangle the keys in front of the blond for proof. "Right here….and still dry, too," he added, stealing a quick glance over at their daughter.
"Daddy, I don't do that anymore!" Issy huffed, insulted as the two men laughed.
Now, as Brian realized it was time for them to leave, he found himself hesitating. Issy was so young, and she would be riding on that big bus all by herself. Was she old enough to do this? This was his little girl here…..
"Brian? You'd better get going," he heard Justin cautioning him. He looked over at his husband and nodded. "Okay," he agreed, but he didn't move to comply.
Issy reached up to take her father's hand and gaze up at him. "Daddy, come on," she pleaded; everything was fixed now, so she couldn't understand what the problem was. She tried to tug on Brian's hand to get him to move toward the door but her father's feet seemed to be cemented to the floor.
Justin frowned, perplexed by Brian's actions; he could see the indecision in the handsome face as he remained rooted to his spot in the foyer. "Something wrong?" he asked. "Brian?"
"Are you sure she'll be all right on the bus, Justin? Maybe it'd be better if I drive her to school myself."
Justin smiled, realizing what was wrong now. He walked over to brush the hair back tenderly from the brunet's forehead. "She'll be fine, Dad," he assured her. "You're not even heading in the same direction, and she's already had a tour of the school. Her teacher will be waiting for her by the bus to take her inside to the class along with the other new students. You know how excited she is about riding the bus – she'll do just fine. She's Brian Kinney's daughter for fu…uh, for Pete's sake, remember?"
Brian peered into the insightful, loving eyes of his partner. "You really think so?" He was amazed at how something this simple could make him feel so fucking terrified, but it was their daughter, for fuck's sake, and it was a very scary world out there.
Justin placed his forehead against the other man's for a couple of seconds before pulling back and saying, "Yeah, I really do. We can't protect her 24/7, Brian. You of all people should know that. Have faith in her – she has my genes after all."
Brian looked down at his daughter, so much like the man who was responsible for bringing her into this rather intimidating world; yeah, she did come from a very hearty, courageous stock. He would have to rely on that today; that still didn't mean he wouldn't worry about her every second of the day, though. "Okay," he decided, reaching over to grab Justin by the neck to pull him in for a brief but deep kiss. He reluctantly pulled away as he heard a distinctive huff of impatience coming from nearby. The two lovers shared a mutual smile as Brian said, "Okay, Little Girl, let's get going. Tell Papa goodbye."
Issy bounced excitedly on her feet, now that she figured it was finally time to go. "Bye, Papa!" she cried out, beaming. "Have to go!" she announced, pulling her other father toward the door.
"Bye, Honey! Have a great time in school!" Justin smiled at his daughter's enthusiasm as Brian turned the knob to open the door as a sudden realization occurred to him. "Wait just a second!" he exclaimed. "She's forgetting her lunch!" He rushed down the hallway to the kitchen to retrieve their daughter's vinyl lunch box festooned with Disney Princess characters all over it. Running back to the front door, he handed it over to Brian. "Now you're ready," he proclaimed, smiling proudly at his family.
"Later, Papa," Brian called out to Justin as Issy waved back at him with a beaming smile; Brian waggled his eyebrows at him and winked just as he closed the door behind them. Feeling like a hurricane had just blown out, Justin stood there for a few moments, noticing the sudden, unusual quiet before turning to slowly trudge back down the hallway toward the stairs to resume his latest art consignment. Before Izzy came along, he had always relished those moments of solitude when he could really concentrate on his work; now, with both Brian and her gone, he noticed how much he actually craved the craziness that went along with their unorthodox, little family unit. Hope you have fun, little Angel, he thought as he slowly walked up the steps. And I hope your OTHER daddy survives it...
Brian was inexplicably quiet on the short drive down the paved road. He still wasn't sure this was a good idea, but he knew how much their daughter had been looking forward to her first day at school, and her first journey on the big, yellow bus. Unlike some children who dreaded their first day of kindergarten and who practically cowered under their bed at the thought of being forced to attend school, Issy had been talking nonstop all week about nothing else but her first day as a student. Now, armed with a brand-spanking new backpack, Armani clothes, and a spotless lunchbox studded with gems, she was hardly able to sit still at the thought of her imminent adventure.
Brian slowed the car down to a stop at the end of the driveway, leaving the motor idling. He could just make out the shape of what appeared to be his daughter's school bus stopped about a mile down the road, picking up another child. Soon it would be time for him to say goodbye to his little girl.
Reluctantly, he opened the car door and walked around the front to the passenger side. Opening up the other door, he leaned in and extended his hand out to his daughter. "Looks like the bus is coming, Princess," he told the excited child, who clapped her hands in delight as she quickly took her father's hand and rushed to scoot out of the seat.
Brian stood there in the crisp, fall air, clasping the tiny, pale hand of his daughter as they waited together for the quickly-approaching vehicle. As it slowed down in front of the driveway, Brian turned to his daughter and squatted down next to her. "You have a great time today, Issy. And make sure you eat all your lunch, you hear? And don't forget your ABCs and how to write your name, okay? Color me and Papa a real pretty picture and bring it home so we can hang it up next to some of Papa's." He knew he was stalling and sounding like an overbearing, hovering parent, but he couldn't help it; he was.
"Daddy….." Issy reproached him, using the same tone of voice that he often heard from Justin when he was procrastinating. She pulled on the sleeve of his suit jacket urgently. "I have to go, Daddy," she told her father as the bus slowly came to a stop in front of the long, curved driveway. The air brakes issued a loud hissing sound as the driver pulled on a worn, metal handle inside and the two accordion doors swung open, silently inviting their newest student to come inside.
An older, plump woman smiled down at the enchanting picture of father and daughter – fortunately for Brian, the schools here were very diligent about making their newest – and littlest – students feel welcome during a time when it might prove to be quite overwhelming, and part of their orientation program was to provide a personal approach.
The bus driver rose from her chair with surprising agility and hopped down from the bus, glancing at a small photo she held in her hand to verify the identity of her newest passenger. "You must be Isabella," she said, holding out her hand with a smile. "I'm very pleased to meet you." The sight of this rather large woman looming towering over her suddenly spooked the previously-confident little girl slightly as she shrank back from her, seeking the protection of her father's lean legs as she leaned back into them for reassurance.
"It's okay, Honey," the woman said, still smiling in an attempt to reassure the beautiful girl with the long, shiny blond hair and cornflower-blue eyes. "My name's Theresa. I'm here to take you to school." She gazed up at the handsome man holding onto the little girl's hand. "You must be her father?"
Brian nodded affirmatively. "Brian Kinney," he informed her.
"Well, Mr. Kinney, I promise to take very good care of this precious cargo for you and make sure she gets back home safely." Brian bit his lip nervously; this woman seemed friendly and actually appeared to like his daughter – both hopeful signs. One part of him, though, desperately wanted to hold onto his daughter's hand and never let it go, while the other, more rational side of him remembered Justin's words earlier about not being able to protect their child all the time. He took a deep breath, knowing the first day would surely be the worst; the only question was, though, for whom?
He knelt down so he could look his daughter in the eye and said, "Issy – You're a big girl now and it's time to go to school. There's your bus, Princess. You ready to go? I'm sure Theresa here will take very good care of you and they'll have all kinds of neat things for you to do when you get there."
Issy's lower lip trembled as she replied, "Will it really be okay, Daddy? Promise?" The big, blue eyes were wide as they stared intently into her father's face.
Brian swallowed the lump in his throat before saying firmly, "I promise, Honey. You'll have a great time, you'll see." He smiled at her confidently, masking the wave of insecurity his own heart felt at the moment.
Theresa stood nearby, not wanting to rush them unnecessarily but knowing she had to keep a fairly rigid schedule. She had been driving buses for over 30 years now, though – fresh out of high school – so she was all too familiar with the first-day pangs of both child AND parent. And from the looks of anxiety on this man's face, he had it bad. "She'll be just fine, Mr. Kinney. But we really do need to get going so we're not late."
"Is my big girl ready to go, then?" Brian asked his daughter, not willing to let her leave until she assured him she would be okay.
Issy bit her lip for a few seconds in thought, so much like her father, before she finally nodded shyly. "Yeah, Daddy, I want to go," she decided.
Brian took a deep breath and rose to his feet. This is it, then, he thought. Whether I'm ready or not. He slowly let the familiar, soft hand of his daughter go and stepped back a couple of steps as he watched the bus driver reach for Issy's hand and gently walk her toward the bus.
Just as Issy turned to say goodbye to her father for the last time that morning, Brian thought of one more thing. "Wait, Honey!" he implored, as he reached in hurriedly for a compact, red digital camera he was carrying in his suit pocket. He quickly pressed the button to turn it on as he told his daughter, "Smile, Issy!"
The little girl gave her father a smile so reminiscent of Justin's, making Brian's heart flip flop, as he quickly pressed the shutter button to take her photo - it would no doubt be the latest wallpaper for his laptop at Kinnetik - and nodded at her that it was okay for her to finally leave. "Bye, Daddy!" she called out excitedly as she blew her father an air kiss. Brian began to raise his hand to his lips to reciprocate, before, feeling a little silly, he settled for waving back at her instead and smiling as Theresa nodded and turned to help the little girl step up into the bus.
Brian stood there, watching intently as he followed his daughter taking her first walk "down the aisle" as the bus driver helped her find a seat next to a window facing her father. As the driver returned to her seat, she nodded once more at Brian as she closed the doors with her priceless passenger and Issy turned her face toward the window.
The last sight Brian saw as the bus pulled away was his daughter's chubby little hand, waving goodbye. He sighed as he looked down at the smiling photo of her daughter he had just taken, knowing his little girl wasn't the only one about to embark on an unfamilliar journey. He somehow knew that his journey with the little girl who had firmly stolen his and Justin's heart was just beginning...
