A/N: My Trigedasleng isn't too great, especially the grammar portion. I provided the translation directly after the phrase and anything with is an asterisk is something I made up. Thank you to the people who left reviews/followed/favorite. Your feedback is very much appreciated and keeps me thinking!
ashor3: I try my best to stay original...I'm glad you are enjoying it thus far!
MJandSports: I've been so swamped with work, an internship and school that this story has been brewing in my mind. Seldom do I have time to write, but I am glad I can when I get the chance. Thanks for your feedback!
xxIceEyesxx27: All I can say is thank you, and that does not cover it.
turtle: One, I love turtles, and two thank you!
lowie: I'm pumped for that interaction, my outline changed a bit so I hope you enjoy what is to come when that meeting happens.
"Okay, okay. Jeesh," came the voice. A brunette gracefully hurdled over the foliage that concealed her, "You got me sky princess. Now what's with the cat?" A gruff snort came from behind causing all three females to turn around, "I was wondering the same thing."
"Lincoln," the two females breathed out with a range of emotion. Octavia's eyes lit up with relief while Clarke visibly stiffened, her face relaying nothing short of bewilderment.
"I thought you went to Polis," Octavia questioned. Lincoln gave a shameful shake of his head.
"I intended to," he began to explain, "but I had to stop in my bunker to get some last minute stuff and seek refuge from the rain. That's where I found her." He motioned to Clarke and eyes locked on hers. Clarke held his gaze before stuttering an apology. Lincoln shrugged and continued, "She was asleep, and had this...uhm, animal's paw on her chest." Both Lincoln and Octavia were now looking at Clarke who knew she was expected to explain how she encountered such a creature. As she told her tale, the power couple stared at her intently, in awe of what she was relaying. She told them everything, thinking it was pointless to gloss over any details. In the process, she apologized to Lincoln for using his art supplies and invading his home. He brushed it off again, understanding that drawing was an escape and offered his fortress of solitude to the sky girl whenever she wanted. He understands the blood on the healer's hands, but he had been around those who had killed more than he and understand the need to get away. It was why he forged the bunker after all.
"So that's pretty much what happened since I left Jaha. Nothing too exciting."
"Expect that you're friends with a stealthy black killing machine," noted Octavia. Clarke shrugged and Lincoln mumbled something gaining the attention of the two women. Instead of focusing on them, his eyes locked with Hania's.
"Trikova," he stated simply, keeping his eyes locked on green.
"A shadow?" Octavia questioned. Lincoln nodded his head.
"It rarely happens, but yes." Both girls looked puzzled, so the Grounder continued to explain, "A shadow has a few meanings in our culture. One being the dark figure cast by the sun, as I am sure you two are familiar with that definition. Another meaning is a soul that watches over you. Some shadows haunt you - others," again he looked to Hania, "protect you. That is why I stopped your arrow, houmon." Lincoln gave a pointed look to his girlfriend which caused Octavia to visibly blush; Clarke made a mental note to ask Octavia about Lincoln's term of endearment as she had not heard it before. As for now, there were more pressing questions.
"So what, are you saying that the mighty powers decided to give me protection because I was deemed "worthy"?" Clarke's words were harsh and filled with sarcasm.
"Something like that," replied Lincoln. Clearly the blonde had a lot to process, but the question that was on the forefront of her mind was why the couple was here. Octavia watched with an observant eye - she saw how Clarke's shoulders slumped and how the strain in the girl's face and neck was struggling to hold the girl up. Octavia was not particularly fond of being here, she still had a bone to pick with the princess, but at least now she had some semblance of understanding. Clarke released a huff of air and her lips pressed together.
"Why are you here, Octavia? I understand Lincoln was making his way to Polis, but that doesn't explain why you're here."
Octavia lay curled up in Lincoln's embrace letting the rise and fall of his chest lull her into a more peaceful state. The battle of Mount Weather was not what she had expected. First of all, her "beloved" Commander struck a deal to free her people with the very men that enslaved her own people. How did red flags not go off in her head? Second, because of her deal, she turned her back on the sky people and effectively her brother. Her allegiance to her brother cost her, she was no longer TriKru. Though, Octavia would argue with Bellamy and say she never was, she was still Skaikru. The brunette internally scoffed - how did growing up under floor boards make her Skaikru? She never interacted with anyone other than the night of the one masquerade, and look how well that went, but, perhaps Bellamy had some merit in saying so. She was livid with the Commander and she turned her back on Indra - like Lincoln, she too was a traitor to the Trikru, but she didn't necessarily belong to the Skaikru either. "Your thoughts are loud, Octavia. Can we not enjoy a breath after war for a bit longer?" The girl said nothing, and simply snuggled into Lincoln more, which he seemed to enjoy, and the brunette drifted off soon after.
Somehow sunlight managed to make its way into their secluded metal confinement and that is how the pair woke up - with sunlight pouring into their eyes. It was Lincoln who woke up first and he looked at the girl in his arms. The strongly built man thought about all the girl had mentioned. Not that they really had time to share, but he gathered that Octavia grew up under the floorboards and that when the Sky Council found her, she was simply moved into a bigger cage and her mother was executed. Bellamy was still an enigma to him but, slowly, he was beginning to figure out the freckled boy. His impulsive and explosive tendencies use to get him in trouble, but since he arrived on the ground, he seemed to realize that his decisions held weight and that failing to calculate each and every option was not wise. Lincoln had also figured out that Bellamy's loyalty to Octavia was so deep rooted that it could very well get him killed. What scared him was that he knew the same was in the reverse. The dark skinned man released a long, resigned sigh. It was a dangerous sport, loving something so completely. Neither Clarke nor Octavia knew that he had been there when Lexa lost Costia. Gustus, Anya, and himself had been there to console her and pick the pieces, so to speak. Indra had seen the tail end of the healing process, or in Lexa's case, the last of the walls she fortified to guard herself. There were certainly moments that Lincoln saw the walls crumble and crack, but he knew better to confront her. Losing Costia built the Commander but destroyed Lexa, he saw the young girl he would swordplay with turn into a calculated, stoic shell of a person. In all honesty, it hurt him. He was by no means in love with Lexa, but she was a sister to him and seeing her crumble was not an easy for either of them or anyone for that matter. There were those who thought the Commander was to young and the death of her lover did her well, after all, the product was uniting the 12 clans. Lincoln firmly believed that was more for Costia than herself - having the threat of the mountain did not hurt though. "Together we conquer, divided we fall." It was the Commander's platform and when Indra moved up the ladder to become one of the top generals, she was not shy in expressing her opinion that Lexa was better for having lost. There is no doubt that the strong minded woman helped carve the Commander to be ruthless and unforgiving. Anya on the other hand, had been with Lexa since she was young and knew how fiercely Lexa felt. Anya did not see love as a weakness, but she certainly knew the dangers of such an emotion and cautioned her second accordingly. "Your thoughts are loud," came a tired voice. Lincoln gave hearty chuckle and kissed the top of the head of the girl in his arms. Both warriors released a long sigh in tandem.
"I was thinking," began the Grounder born man, "about the relationship between the Skai and Tri Krus." Octavia physically tensed and scoffed. "Octavia, you cannot discount the Trikru. Your ill will does not suit you and will compromise you out there." His eyes cast to the sun that had moved to to their left.
"I don't get it, Lincoln. How can you not be mad at Lexa? She had you attacked and tied up for goodness sake."
"She has appearances to keep up."
"What is that suppose to mean?" asked the girl, raising her voice slightly. Lincoln inhaled, letting the metallic air which he despised fill his lungs. He began to explain his real relationship with the Commander, not just his professional one. "There's a heart in there," he spoke with such finality, "but Lexa has buried it down so deep I don't know if she knows where it is."
"She lost Costia, I get that, but that still does not excuse what she did."
"I am not saying that it does, she turned her back on an alliance your people worked so hard to maintain, but she has lost more than just Costia. When she was called to lead, there was an assassination attempt no more than two hours in. She was the youngest Heda and now is the strongest, but it cost her her childhood. She was isolated, taken away from her village and brought to Polis to train. She saw her family once a month for a few hours and then it was back to training." Octavia gave a noncommittal grunt and Lincoln continued. "She had a brother, a year or so older. He was her best friend and was turned into a reaper when he was nine. He ventured too far from the mountain and began to attack his home village - Lexa had to kill him to protect her village and to prove her worth as a commander at the age of eight. Two weeks later, she saw her remaining family slaughtered before her eyes on her ninth birthday. She had gotten some time off from training and wanted to go surprise her parents - she remained hidden in the bushes as her village was burned to the ground. At that point she had met Costia and had someone to confide it, to help manage the hurt, but losing Costia was the final straw. The product is what you see today. Do not forget, Octavia, that often those who are stoic and unfeeling are the ones who once felt the most." Octavia was silent, not sure whether she was impressed by Lincoln's words, still angry at the Commander for her betrayal, angry at Lincoln for being so damn considerate and accepting or mad at herself for not realizing how much the decision must have weighed down on Lexa. She made a note to think about it.
"How did you escape?" she asked, changing the conversation.
"Indra," Lincoln replied simply.
"What?" Octavia sat up and blinked in disbelief.
"She made me chose, Trikru and forgiveness or you. It was not a hard decision, really. She cares about you, O. She may have disowned you as her second, but she has not stopped caring. I suspect she was testing me. I am still a traitor to them, but Indra is changing. She was not afraid to express how she thought the Commander was weak and how death strengthened Lexa. I believe now, she is realizing the balance of emotion and detachment is what makes for the best anything. The old Lexa is coming back - do you think she would allow Clarke to pull all of her stunts if she didn't feel something for her?"
"What, Clarke and the Commander?" Lincoln nodded, "I guess it makes sense, I'll have to ask her." The words hung in the air leaving the couple to their respective thoughts. Octavia wondered if Clarke would even talk about it after what she said in the tunnels. Minutes passed in a comfortable silence until Octavia's stomach began to rumble, signaling the need for sustenance. The eating area was not far off and both Octavia and Lincoln were ready for some normalcy. Bellamy joined the couple with a heavy look about his face and ate in silence for the most part. Finally Octavia broke the silence and, with an exasperated sigh, she asked her brother about his composure, or lack there off.
"Just a long few days, O. Nothing to worry about, I have to say, I am glad not to be in a baby-food-colored uniform." His sister gave a quick laugh.
"Hey, where's Clarke? I understand yesterday was draining, but I figured she'd at least come and get food." Bellamy's shoulders visibly dropped and his eyebrows furrowed together, suddenly finding food quite intriguing. "Bell? What are you telling me?"
"She took off, said she couldn't be here anymore."
"What do you mean?"
"I mean she's not here. Is that so impossible to understand?" It had been a while since anyone had seen Bellamy explode and all eyes were on him. "I'm going for a walk," he muttered leaving his food untouched. Octavia rushed after her brother and grabbed his elbow pushing him up against the outside of the Ark.
"No, you don't get to do this; explain, Bell." The fire in the girl's eyes was obvious, "And don't you dare bullshit me."
The boy gave a small laugh, "Lincoln was right, you are very strong. I'm sorry for forgetting that." Octavia smirked and her grip on her brother loosened.
"That still doesn't explain anything," she said with a softer inflection.
"Octavia...we killed. We killed them all and it was Clarke who made that decision. We pulled a lever that wiped out innocents, children, people who helped us survive. She killed Dante Wallace point blank for effect and saw her mother being tortured, helpless to do anything. She just..couldn't - and honestly, if I didn't have you I couldn't either." The admission was big for her brother, the independent, strong-minded leader, fessing up to how much he needed his sister. "Clarke doesn't have anyone like I have you. I tried, you know, I tried to give her forgiveness. I gave her forgiveness, but it's not what she needs. She needs it from herself and possibly the Commander."
"She has her mother," Octavia offered.
"A mother she cannot look at without seeing everything she has lost." The sky born woman suddenly felt very guilty for unloading onto Clarke in the tunnels.
"Where did she go?" Bellamy offered nothing more than a shrug.
"A part of me hopes she went to go see Lexa."
"Why?" the girl scoffed again at the name.
"Because Lexa understands. I know you don't understand or particularly like your commander at the moment, but she has a soft spot for our blondie."
"Funny, that's what Lincoln said."
At the mention of his name, the man appeared by his girlfriend's side. "We should talk," he spoke quietly.
"Lincoln and I talked for a few hours before we decided that him going to Polis would be best for both the Skai and Tri Krus. I wanted to wait a few more days, but it's been obvious that it is uncertain what is to happen with the Skaikru."
"I don't understand, we killed off a race that had been torturing the Grounders - how does that not make us strong?"
"It doesn't matter. Other nations are ready to attack and raid. They are a more radical group, tired of the old traditions and are ready to start using our weapons. That's why we need this mediation between groups."
"A liaison," Clarke stated simply. Lincoln's eyebrow shot up, unfamiliar with the term.
"Someone who communicates between two parties or groups, an ambassador of sorts. The big lug and I figured he would be best having experienced both cultures." A resigned sigh came from the healer. Clarke thought a moment, it was certainly not a bad idea, but just having Lincoln as the liaison may seem like the Grounders are trying to tip the scale in their favor.
"You should too, O."
"Which is why I am here," she responded all too quickly. Clarke knew the answer was bull, but hadn't the energy to argue or further inquire.
"Oh. Okay...uhm bye then? I don't want to keep you from Polis." Octavia remained unmoved and the healer could see the conflict in her eyes. Octavia let out a steady breath.
"I don't understand why," Clarke raised an eyebrow, "Why trust Lexa?" the blonde's hand made a tight fist and the cat by her side could feel the tension rolling off from the two women in waves.
"We won against the mountain, what does it matter wh-" The blonde didn't get a chance to finish.
"Yeah, no thanks to her."
Despite Octavia's distaste for Clarke in the tunnels, the intensity had subsided, or so she thought. She honestly did not plan to call out Clarke, but it seemed she had some unresolved anger, hence her shortness. Especially during the last few days, she had time to think about her words in the tunnel and how Lincoln's words put what she said in perspective. The muscular man gave his girlfriend a small look of disappointment and slight confusion, seeing her attack on the broken leader unnecessary.
Octavia had almost forgotten about the large cat by Clarke's side and flinched when it began to move towards her. Clarke was unsure how the panther was going to react, so she decided it best to lay a hand on its neck as it stalked towards the brunette. Intense forest green eyes bore into the brunette and it appeared as if the cat was ready to attack, its teeth showing and legs low, ready to strike.
"Hania…" the healer cautioned. The panther froze and looked to Clarke being sure to maintain its composure, but relaxed when it saw the hurt in Clarke's eyes and backed away, turned on its heels and sprinted to the forest. Octavia gave the blonde a confused look while Lincoln looked nothing short of impressed. The brunette huffed with annoyance and slight amusement.
"Kamp raun, Oktevia." (Stay near, Octavia) Octavia glared at Lincoln, wishing her eyes could pierce through him. "No mo, ste kom Klark . Nou mou kom Klark, ai get klin kar* Beja?" (Enough, stay with Clarke. No more with Clarke, I know you care. Please?) he spoke with such determination. Great, Clarke thought, at least I know they're talking about me. For the amount of time she had been around Lexa she failed to pick up on Trigedasleng, and right now, she was regretting it. Lincoln looked amused and Octavia huffed in annoyance once more.
"Fine," she spat, "only for you." Lincoln grinned and began walking away from the women. "No no, where do you think you are going?"
"To Polis, the plan does not change."
"Beja, Linkon. Ste." Lincoln knew if he did not stay, Octavia may flee; he grunted in response throwing his spear into the ground marking their area. The blonde was now unsure what to do, she muttered something about going to find Hania and hastily left camp, leaving Lincoln and Octavia at a stand still.
"What?" bit the brunette?
"Was that necessary, houmon?"
"No no, you don't get to houmon me. Not now Lincoln," despite her frustration, Octavia could not help but to smile at the term of endearment.
"Just try," started Lincoln, "try to get along. You know she's been through a lot - I thought you were over this."
"So did I," replied the girl. Lincoln nodded, understanding the girl's reluctance. His own reconciliation process with Indra was not an easy one, it was understandable the difficulty Octavia was facing finding forgiveness for Clarke, the Sky People, Lexa, and Indra.
"Should we follow her?"
"What?" Octavia responded, startled out of her thoughts.
"Clarke, should we follow her, help her look for Hania?" Octavia weighed the options, wondering if it would be an invasion of the healer's privacy.
"Quietly, yes." Lincoln failed miserably at hiding the smirk that took over his face.
"I never said I didn't care," the girl teased, shouldering Lincoln's built chest. It didn't take long for them to track Clarke, her forrest skills regarding stealth had hardly improved which quietly concerned Octavia; perhaps she should train the blonde.
Octavia situated herself in a tree that overlooked the surrounding area. Lincoln whispered something about going to seek dinner for the three. The brunette hardly nodded, fixated on the blonde not so far off. Clarke's shoulders were rapidly falling up and down, wracked with sobs as her companion's head lay in her lap. Neither of the girls were aware of how much time had elapsed, but enough for the sun to fall below the treeline. The healer was unsure why she was crying, the emotions of the last few weeks had simply all hit her once. It was dangerous, she reminded herself, to stand still. Thinking will be the death of me. When Clarke moved to get up, Octavia scrambled down from the tree as quietly and quickly as she could. She beat the blonde back to the dropship by a few minutes and discovered that Lincoln had found a boar and it was well underway, roasting over a fire. In their quiet moments before the blonde returned, Octavia was emotionally drained and physically dropped next to Lincoln allowing herself a moment of weakness next to the man. Her heart hurt after seeing the healer so distraught and run down. It would do her well to remember that they all had burdens to shoulder, but that was no reason to turn on one another.
The evening was tame compared to the rest of the day. The four had eaten in relative silence, accompanied by the crackling fire and Hania's incessant licking of her paws. It was Octavia to break the silence. "I was never supposed to relieve the guard from his south post that night, was I?" Clarke recognized where the conversation was headed, but only nodded in a brief acknowledgement. "Lincoln told me, Clarke. The Commander wanted me dead." Octavia spoke as if it was now apart of everyday life, the irony in it all was that was what their life had become. "You stopped that from happening." Clarke refused to acknowledge this. "Lincoln and Indra figured it out…"
"She cares," the blonde said plainly.
"She freed Lincoln to help save us," Octavia stated. She figured it was easiest to stick with the facts for now. While Clarke was not aware of this fact, she had not held it past the general. Indra had a silent affinity for the girl from the floorboards, it was rewarding to see the Grounder finally act on it. "Lexa allowed it too. She cares, Clarke."
Clarke whipped around, tiring of the conversation, "Don't you think I know that?!" she snapped, "She is the most merciful one of all of us, and I can't hate her. I can't hate her," the healer repeated. She was fuming, her muscles tensed and her words bounced around in Octavia's head as she took in the girl in front of her. "I can't hate her so I hate myself," Clarke finished. The words cut through Octavia like hot metal on innocent flesh. She was surprised by the sudden outburst and again felt a weight of guilt on her back for repeatedly telling Clarke she wasn't good enough. The night continued with a thick air and neither of the girls dared to say anything further of the topic. By the time the fire died down Octavia and Lincoln had retreated to their makeshift shelter and Clarke was dozing off, enjoying the warmth of the cat beside her.
Clarke and Octavia had fallen into a silent morning pattern, and despite the occasional outburst, the days were comfortable. Clarke would wake first and make sure the brunette warrior was still there. She would lay still, her hands running through Hania's fur while she waited for Octavia to get up. The two would check the perimeter of the shelter and take turns bathing in the river before checking the traps. Octavia would occasionally meet up with Lincoln who enjoyed exploring while the blonde washed herself. As the sun would reach its climax in the day, Clarke would find herself wandering the woods with Hania. Sometimes she would lead the dark haired beast, scouting various parts of the woods. Other times she would let the cat lead the adventure. Her favorite spot was a cliff that overlooked a still river. At least twice a week she would sit there, her back against Hania, and draw. Despite her impulse drawings in Lincoln's bunker, her hands were still reacquainting themselves with the medium. Her strokes were still harsh with hard, geometric lines, but as the days progressed, her lines became softer and more organic. Regardless of how she spent her day, she made sure to find her way home by nightfall, dutifully returning to the dropship.
On a particularly warm night by the fire, Octavia was sprawled out leaning against Lincoln. Her content smile normalized the situation for the blonde and almost made her forget the unforgiving world outside of their bubble. Almost.
Clarke had heard them talking over the days, reconciling with the fact that they belonged to neither the Sky People or Tree Clan.
"Don't you get it, Lincoln? We have no home. We are not theirs nor are we from the ground. We are nothing." The fighter spoke with an exasperated tone while she solemnly looked at the warrior in front of her.
"You seek a home?"
Octavia stared blankly back at Lincoln. "You do not?"
Lincoln smiled before he responded. "My home travels with a fierce heart and a resilient head. It matters not if I am Trikru or Skaikru. Wherever you are, Octavia, I am home." Octavia looked stunned for a moment and mumbled something in Trigedasleng. Lincoln responded with a warm smile and open arms. That night neither Octavia nor Lincoln returned until the following midday. The girl from under the floorboards looked lighter, happier even. And if that didn't warm Clarke's heart she didn't know what would.
The healer's head was against Hania's midsection and her head shifted under the flexing muscles of the panther as she cleaned her paws. While Clarke and Octavia bathed, the blonde learned her companion would take that time to hunt. It was remarkable to Clarke how such a fierce and ruthless animal could take someone like Clarke- who Hania could easily devour in one bite- in and form a protective relationship. The blonde thought back to the day she found Hania in a snare, how her foot was mangled and her eyes screamed alarm. The beast cared, and so did Clarke. "I'm sorry for snapping at you the other day." Octavia sat up knowing what the blonde was referencing.
"I should not have pushed. Bell and Lincoln kept saying there was something there between you two." Her words were suspended, and her thoughts were unfinished. Clarke was thankful for the cover of night, otherwise the couple would have seen the blush rising from her neck. "Are you okay?" the brunette asked tentatively.
"I will be," it was the most truthful answer the healer could give. Hania purred and laid her head down on her paws. Octavia smiled and Lincoln murmured something in his native tongue to which Octavia smiled and chuckled a bit. Clarke's back went rigid, and she sat up straight.
"Teach me," it sounded more demanding than anything. "I mean," the blonde gathered herself, "I want to learn Trigedasleng. If I am going to go to Polis, I'll need to know it, right?" Both Lincoln and Octavia raised an eyebrow at Clarke's intention to visit Polis with them, but chose to sidestep the matter, instead addressing the immediate question.
"Technically no, English is the prominent language there. Polis is our capital and not all clans are familiar with our dialect. You would not -" Octavia held up her hand, effectively silencing Lincoln.
"We start tomorrow." Lincoln gave Octavia a look, but did not question her decision. He was happy the two girls were finally working out whatever tension was between them. The brunette seemed content to be teaching Clarke something, instead of the otherway around. The Grounder attributed that to Octavia's upbringing, or lack there of. For a gross majority of her life, Octavia had been conditioned to follow orders. "Hide under the floorboards, don't get caught, be quieter, stay out of trouble, don't wander…". It was surprising the girl was not a basket case.
Clarke began her linguistic training that night. Lincoln was to talk to her in nothing but Trigedasleng and if need be, Octavia would translate. Within three days, the blonde could hold a decent conversation. It was broken, but it served it purpose. Despite the amicable atmosphere, there was still a clear divide between the four parties. Lincoln and Octavia would stick together as would Clarke and Hania. The three had been talking more, and although the conversation was still detached, no party would concede in addressing any real issues; it was a conversation at that, and it was a start. All the same, Clarke felt lighter with their company. It surprised her, as she escaped from the Ark for the very reason that she felt being around others would weigh too heavily on her shoulders. She bore it so others didn't have to. Beside her, Hania purred as Clarke's tongue ran through the hardened sounds of Trigedasleng. Octavia had been right, the language was not that difficult, but as with any language, understanding the speech pattern and grammar was.
"Oktevia," the brunette looked up, "haukom kamp yu raun hir?"
"Haukom yu kamp raun hir?" (Why are you here?) the warrior corrected. Clarke huffed in annoyance. "Hey, you're the one who said you wanted to learn the language."
"And you're the one avoiding the question," the blonde retorted. Octavia gave a weak smile.
"I just need to know where you stand when it comes to this alliance Lincoln and I are trying to reform."
"If that were so you would have left as soon as you found me. It's been almost two weeks and Lincoln has wandered off, but you have stayed. Beja, haukom yu kamp raun hir? Ron ai ridiyo op." (Please, why are you here? Speak true.)
Lincoln watched proudly from a distance as he saw various emotions play out on his other half's face before she acquiesced, "I care, okay?" The blonde said nothing, "God, you are so incredibly difficult…" groaned Octavia. The brunette stood up and began to pace. "Look," huffed Octavia, "I may not agree with what you and the Commander did at TonDC, I may not like that you sent my brother to infiltrate Mount Weather, but you did what you had to do. I can respect that." Clarke stood, processing the information, well aware of the weight of the admission from the warrior and honestly dumbfounded by it all. It all her time on the ground, she knew Octavia to be hardheaded and stubborn, almost more than Lexa. Hania let out a content purr and the healer spoke out of reverence once she collected her thoughts.
"Mochof, Oktevia." The brunette could almost see Clarke's heart swell and in that moment, Clarke knew she wanted nothing more that to have her friend back. It hurt too much to be aloof and, briefly, the healer wondered how much hurt Lexa was put through to harden her shell so tactfully.
Clarke was pulled out of her thoughts when Octavia surprised her by wrapping her arms around the taller woman. "I stayed because you need to come to Polis. The sky people need this alliance," she paused when Clarke stiffened at the mention of her people, "but more importantly, you need to talk to Lexa." The healer knew this and did nothing to fight it, she nodded into the girl's shoulder silently worried that she was not ready for this display of raw emotion. Admittedly, she felt a bit dizzy - the feeling had a striking likeness to the mixed emotion she felt after Lexa threw her out of the Commander's tent. "We leave tomorrow," Octavia finished. Not the she gave Clarke much of an option on the matter.
"Clarke?" Lincoln said in a small voice, "She will continue to break her own heart so no one else can because she thinks it is easier. Show her that opening up herself is worth it."
*kar - care
A/N: I'm not going to lie, updates will be slow. I will try to post at least biweekly, but we shall see. I will not abandon the story, I can guarantee that. Come chat with me if you'd like either here or at .com.
