Disclaimer: Same as always, not mine, I just like to write it!

OMGOMGOMG!!! I actually got this up before Christmas, OH I rock!

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Artemis calmly walked down the stairs to Butler's room, so to say the new Butler's room, since the old Butler had retired. It was exactly the same as it had been before, except for the absence of the old Butler's little sister's picture. Though he was massive and dangerous looking, this new Butler was not nearly as well built or suited for dangerous jobs as the old one was, and Artemis was still trying to train him up for the kinds of things they would need to do. He drew out a knife from the back pocket of his jeans, (he was going for the "casual" look) Swiss Army no less, and strode casually up to his new bodyguard. In seconds, the hands of the new bodyguard were up in the air as cold steel was pressed against his throat.

"Master Fowl, are you trying to kill me?" he asked as the knife was carelessly pushed away. "One slip and I would be dead. I doubt that you realize this but you are going to murder someone like that someday." Artemis shook his head, the exact reaction he was hoping not to get.

"Butler, I know I could kill you, and yet you do not take me seriously. If you are going to be of any use to me, you will have to."

"You are merely a child, no immediate threat."

Artemis sighed. "Get everyone in the front hall, but first I will need a direct and secure line to your predecessor. Do not ask me why, just do it."

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"Artemis?"

"Yes Butler. It is me, now listen, I need you to stand outside of your cottage and wait for Holly, I wish that I had the time to explain, but I don't. If you can, get Minerva and meet me at Section 8."

"Artemis, what are you planning?"

"Soon my old friend, soon."

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Artemis arrived in the front hall to find that everyone was there, waiting for him.

"Son, what is going on?" his father asked through gritted teeth.

"I need all of you to promise me that you will do exactly as I say." As Artemis had expected, no one replied. As he was about to explain, Holly called again. Artemis put his hand to his ear and said, "Holly, you have an update?"

"Yeah Artemis, we calculated wrong, the hit-man will be there in about half a minute, Mulch will too. Lock the door and get out as fast as you can. Sorry, we don't do calculations very well without Foaly."

Artemis then remembered he had been talking to Foaly before Holly called. "Where is Foaly?"

"On break. Look, just rip up the center floorboards and wait. I can't waste any more of your time, just go."

"Wait Holly, pick up Butler would you." As he hung up, he realized everyone was starring at him.

"Ahtey doin'?" His little sister asked.

"Yes Arty sweetie, what were you just doing?" Artemis could tell that they all thought he had gone insane by the amazed expressions on their faces.

"I will explain later. Butler, help me move that couch." He pointed to the couch in the center of the room." Thankfully, Butler did as he was told without question. "Now we need these floorboards ripped up. Butler?" His new bodyguard was looking perplexed at him.

"What?"

"Help me rip up the floorboards. Thank God Mulch can get through the foundation, with that patch of clay, he won't like it but…"

"Master Fowl?"

"Oh right. One, two, three!" The boards were ripped up with a sickening crack, Artemis could tell his hands were bleeding, but his magic would take care of that, and there was no time to think twice about it. Soon there was a hole big enough for Mulch to get in, and them to get out. There was a pounding on the door now, and a sinister voice came to their ears.

"Open up Young Master Fowl, I know you are there, and I just want to play…" A single gunshot rang through the air, and Artemis' mother screamed.

"Arty, Arty, what's going on?" his mother asked.

Artemis did not answer, he remembered his magic, and ran to the door. Focusing all of his concentration, he sent a bolt of electricity through the door to the hit-man on the other side. A scream of pain told him that he had been successful.

"There, that should buy us some time." He said, before remembering that his family knew nothing of the People. Thankfully, before his family could react, Mulch appeared.

"In the name of Holly Short herself Artemis! Could your family get any bigger?" Artemis laughed. No matter how serious the problem, Mulch could always make light of it.

"Family, Mulch, Mulch, Family." Mulch smiled, and waved.

"I don't know what to say, hi, or… Top o' the mornin'"

"Mulch, just because you are officially LEP, you shouldn't advertise it, Section 8 is a dangerous sector to be in…" but even as Artemis scolded Mulch, he couldn't hide the smirk playing across his face.

"Okay, single file down the tunnel, didn't expect so many people. Hey Artemis, where's Butler?"

"Holly is getting him Mulch. He is going to meet us down at Section 8 with Minerva."

"Aww, was Arty worried about Minnie?" Mulch snickered.

"Nice to see you again Mulch."

"Nice to see you too Artemis, now let's go before I explode." Mulch said as he motioned down the hollow tunnel. "Had to make it so you guys could crawl down, didn't I?"

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Huzzah! Well, It's a bit longer than the other one, I will make the next one longer, don't worry. Remember, help me out and review.

Thanks to all the people who helped me with their tips. I truly do appreciate it. (Ehem… KelsE… again… doesn't any one else review! And by review, I don't mean "GOOD JOB… YOU ROCK! I mean actual reviewing… THANKS KELSE!)