Bridezilla

By: me, Jupitrie

Summary: I think the title gives the general basis of the story away...

Disclaimer: I don't have to write a disclaimer for every chapter, do I? Eh, I guess better safe than sorry: I don't own the PPG. The Powerpuff girls are Craig McCracken's creation.


"Butch is here?" Bubbles asked while checking her old bedroom's window. "Wow, he's gotten cuter...but he still has such bad taste in clothes..."

"Get away from the window, you're only in your slip!" Blossom snapped.

"Will you please, please take a chill pill!" Bubbles hissed back and went back to patting her hair with a towel.

"Aaaah. An uninterrupted shower." Buttercup strolled into her old room and sighed again. "No annoying idiots asking to use the toilet. No hot water suddenly getting switched to cold...Is this heaven? Waaaait." She looked at the dress that was placed on her old dresser that literally had her name stamped across it. "No. It's hell." She hissed. "Blossom! This is HELL!"

"Sheesh." Blossom huffed. "It's just one day. And you'll look beautiful."

Buttercup picked up the faded rose dress and wrinkled her nose.

"At least it's not like— hot magenta or something." Bubbles said coming out from the closet in her own pink dress. "See? Not too shabby. I actually like it." Bubbles nodded toward Blossom. "Can you do me up?" she asked, and the bride was happy to comply as she zipped up the back.

It really was a nice dress. The cut was flattering to those with curves, and for those who didn't have any would have the nice option to look a little fashionista. It was elegant and simple, with thick straps coming to form a sweet curl of fabric slightly off the center of the cleavage.

"Yes, it does look nice." Blossom sighed happily. "And you'll match with Robin, Esther, and Wednesday. So! Here you are." She said handing Bubbles two pink ribbons.

"What are these for?" Bubbles asked.

"For...your hair." Blossom said in an obvious tone. "I made an exception for you to have two bows in your hair because you always did look good in two pigtails."

"I was planning on leaving it down and curled, actually." Bubbles smiled gently. "It is a special occasion..."

"Well these are just an option. If you want to put bows in your hair..."

"Oh, well thanks." Bubbles said and took them. "But really I think I won't— "

"PUT THE DAMN BOWS IN YOUR HAIR, OR I SWEAR...I KNOW ALL OF YOUR WEAKNESSES— DON'T MAKE ME GO THERE!"

Buttercup and Bubbles blinked.

"Oh." Blossom whimpered, shocked at herself as she rested a dainty looking hand over her chest and panted, "I-I'm sorry. I'm...stressing out."

"Damn right you are." Buttercup grumbled and took her dress and marched into the closet.

"Do you need a drink?" Bubbles asked her sister.

"A drink?" she snorted, "Oh, you mean...like a glass of water? Yeah, maybe?" Blossom rubbed her arm. "I have to get ready soon myself...but I'm just so nervous."

"What are you nervous of?" Buttercup asked in a muffled voice behind the closet door. "You couldn't stop talking about your dashing prince charming a few months ago."

"Yeah, well it's normal for girls to feel a little stressed on their wedding day." Bubbles said in a supportive tone. "Here, sit down. If you want, we can talk."

Blossom sighed. "Y-yeah...that would be nice."

Buttercup emerged from the closet and headed straight for the nearest mirror and balked.

"This dress makes me look like I'm some Barbie-wannabe!" Buttercup wailed.

When she turned around, she saw Bubbles gawking at a sobbing Blossom.

"What...happened?" Buttercup asked in an exhausted tone.

"Y-you don't like your dress." Blossom sobbed and covered her face. Bubbles hurriedly started patting Blossom's shoulders while also sending a look of distress to Buttercup.

"Oh dear lord." Buttercup grumbled. "Blossom! If it wasn't for the fact that you're getting married today, I would so totally hit you right now."

"I actually agree with Buttercup for once." Bubbles nodded with a frown. "Blossom, what the heck is going on?"

"Nothing!" Blossom said sniffing. "I just...I'm just..."

Both of her sisters waited, with their arms crossed and their eyebrows raised. Blossom looked down at her lap, fidgeted with her hands and finally looked up.

"Is it eight o' clock already? I have to get ready!" she said and zipped out of the room in a bolt of pink.

"She's...crazy." Buttercup deadpanned.

"I know. Do you have a digital camera handy?" Bubbles said excitedly. "This will be a major hit on Yo'tube!"


"Hiya Professor." Bubbles said in passing as she floated down the staircase. She had noticed her father figure crouched on all fours by the window, and merely though he was looking for lost keys or what not, but he immediately looked up after she greeted him and flagged her down.

"Bubbles! Perfect timing!" Professor shouted and motioned for his daughter to come crouch by him. "I was just thinking of either calling your or Buttercup to investigate something for me."

"Investigate?" Bubbles put down her things and frowned. "Professor we're both really busy right now!" she sighed. "If Blossom saw you-"

"Come here." Professor motioned Bubbles quickly toward the window he was crouched under. Bubbles didn't realize that it was already strange how sneaky he looked. She walked over, and immediately her father tugged her down. "Now, use your x-ray vision and tell me what you see."

Bubbles did.

"Well?" Professor asked.

"I can see your skeleton." Bubbles said.

"No! No! No!" the professor hissed. "Over there! Look toward the street!"

"Oh!" Bubbles turned her head out toward the front yard-where the wall she had her forehead pressed against looked like clear plastic now. She saw that on the other side of the window, a car had been pulled up, and in the car, none other than the groom was sitting inside talking on the phone.

"Hey! Antonio's here!" Bubbles said excitedly. "I should call Blossom-" she was stopped by her father.

"I know, he's been here for a whole two minutes!" hissed her father. "I would...just like to know what he's talking about on the phone he has there." He said calmly. "Just...curious."

"What?" Bubbles narrowed her eyes at her father's skeleton and undid her x-ray vision to see a very worried father staring back at her. "Professor what is this all about?"

"Just do it!" Professor wildly pointed toward the wall again. "Read his lips if you have to. Or...or use your super hearing! I almost forgot you had that too!"

"Professor, I'm not going to spy on my sister's fiance!" Bubbles hissed. "Shame on you!"

"We can buy a puppy." Professor said.

"I don't even live here anymore!" Bubbles rolled her eyes. "And I'll much rather save one from the pound."

"Then-then... do it for your father. Your father who lives all alone in this roomy house! And...has too much time on his hands that all he does is worry, and worry about his girls and-"

"Ok, ok, I'll do it." Bubbles grumbled. "That's a dirty card, Professor. And just so you know, I'm doing this merely to prove to you that Antonio is a nice guy."

"Quick! Is he moving? Is he still there?" the Professor asked excitedly, and peered through the window and gave Bubbles the thumbs up. Bubbles rolled her eyes before she activated her enhanced eyesight again. The walls became as clear as glass, she didn't want to hike up her super hearing until she saw something suspicious.

That's when Bubbles noticed something. Professor noticed her furrow her brow.

"What? What?" Professor asked.

"He is so, so fit."

Professor pressed his hands over his eyes, and made a sound that resembled a sob.

"No, I mean...even for a citizen. I swear he could easily bench press... well, 300? I'm guessing. His muscles just look abnormally...big."

"Steroids?" Professor suddenly perked up. "He's on steroids?"

"N...no, steroids fill your muscles up with fat before turning into ridiculously fake-looking muscles. He has natural ones...it's just..." Bubbles scratched her chin. "What is it? He always did look familiar...I swear it's on the tip of my tongue..."

"Well who is he talking to?" the Professor asked hurriedly.

"Hm." Bubbles still wasn't comfortable eavesdropping, but the minute she picked up Antonio's warm voice talking to someone in a comforting tone in Portuguese. "Oh, he's only talking to his mama." She said, hearing him address his mother a few times before she turned her attention away from the scene.

"Oh." The Professor said in a strangely distant tone. "Oh, I see..."

"Professor." Bubbles sighed and reached over to put a hand on her father's shoulder. "Antonio's a nice guy, you don't have to worry. He doesn't seem like a villain...in fact if anybody's a villain at this wedding, it's Blossom. She's driving everyone nuts." She said, "Why can't you give him a chance?"

"I'd like to, sweetheart." The Professor said in a weak voice, he shifted into sitting Indian-style with his back pressed against the wall. "But when your most reasonable daughter is marrying a man after only knowing him for five months, you can't help but feel uneasy."

"Hey." Bubbles reached a reassuring hand out and touched her father's shoulder. "Blossom's a big girl, she can take care of herself. And, if Antonio's not the right guy...Blossom can set him straight. We both know that."

"Y-yes...I guess you're...right..." the Professor sighed.

"Yeah, I-"

"Bubbles!" Blossom was suddenly standing right in front of them, and she was glaring down at her sister. "You'll wrinkle your dress! Come on!" she hissed and yanked her sister up. "Can you do me the big BIG favor of checking everyone's invitations and personal identification cards before they file into their seats? It would help out so much."

"What?" Bubbles narrowed her eyes. "Like...card people at a wedding? Blossom that is ridiculous."

"No, it would be ridiculous if I wasn't a superhero that didn't have dangerous enemies, but unfortunately I am and I do. So." Blossom said quickly and produced a thick clipboard she procured from nowhere and passed it over to Bubbles. "These are all the people that will be on my side of the wedding. Antonio's guests are on the green-tinted papers." She said and then stopped. "I don't want any mishaps. Got it?" she smiled brightly.

Bubbles opened her mouth to respond but was quickly cut off by one of Blossom's sudden hugs that she's been passing around to her sisters since the wedding was announced. It made her sisters completely incapable of arguing or defending themselves when she suddenly threw affection in their face. Bubbles had forgotten that Blossom was a pretty decent hugger.

"I know this is a lot of work, but remember, after my wedding is over and you realize how perfect everything was, you'll want me to do the same for you and you'll be glad you learned from my wedding! Besides it's an important rule of thumb to check the list twice." Blossom smiled happily while pulling away. She patted her sister's shoulders. "Ok! I- Professor! Get off the floor! You'll hurt your back!" Blossom yanked yet another family member up from the floor. "What are you two doing by the window anyway-?" Blossom's attention was finally brought to the window, where she squeaked.

"It's Antonio! Oh god, I hope he didn't see me! What's he doing here so early? Quick! Tell him that I'm already at the club house, ok? " Blossom said pushing Bubbles toward the door and zipping away in streaks of pink.

Just as Bubbles was going to send Professor an incredulous look, the pink streak was back. "Also, Bubbles, meet me at the club house in twenty minutes— we need to do your hair."

"My hair?" Bubbles touched her hair which she had just recently curled and preened herself for a good half hour.

"I got an extra hair stylist just for Buttercup, since, you know...she's not very good at doing anything with it. You'll need to help me hold her down while they do their job. Oh, and afterwards, you can get those pretty bows in your hair." Blossom added brightly. "Wow! See how that works out so nicely?" she asked in a fake incredulous tone.

Professor jumped back when the clipboard in Bubble's hand snapped loudly in two.


Buttercup was confused.

She just didn't understand why Butch wasn't annoying the living daylights out of her anymore. Since she was pulled into the Utonium residence and forced into unflattering dresses, forced to be her sister's slave monkey and whatever else-Butch had a mountainful of opportunities and chances to drop in to humiliate her. However, Butch had been hanging out in the living room-playing Buttercup's old video games while asking her grandpa inappropriate questions. In Butch's case, he was on his best behavior. Strangely, this upset Buttercup.

She looked over toward Blossom who was climbing into Mr. McNoy's car with a bunch of boxes in her hands.

"What did you tell Butch?" Buttercup asked cautiously as she started up the car. Blossom shut the door and buckled herself in a hurry just as Buttercup backed up to make a u-turn.

"Nothing." Blossom said casually.

"Come on." Buttercup growled. "He hasn't bothered me since we got here." She started driving toward the club house that would host Blossom's wedding.

"Which just makes his presence that much more suspicious..." Blossom agreed. "but I had a feeling you'd end up dragging him along so I had an extra seat for him at the reception ready. And if he doesn't behave, I know that all I have to do is make your life hell, and in consequence, he'll pay in the end." She said this all so casually that it almost didn't sound evil.

Buttercup sent her sister a scathing glare. "Seriously, Blossom... I'm asking politely. What the hell did you say to Butch?"

"Nothing!" Blossom said defensively. "Just that if he ruined my wedding, I'll kill him."

Buttercup's tense shoulders relaxed that instant. "That's it?" she shook her head in disbelief. "That doesn't make any sense! He doesn't give a shit about that."

Blossom looked at her nails. "I'm aware. But I have things ready if he gets out of control."

Buttercup shook her head and scoffed. "No you don't. You don't know what he's like when he wants to have 'fun'. You must have threatened him... better than I could!" she said in disbelief.

"Buttercup." Blossom laughed. "No offense, but when it comes to threatening Butch, you're a major softie."

Buttercup slammed on her breaks. Blossom shrieked. A bunch of things inside of the car seemed to thump around as well.

"Buttercup!" Blossom scolded.

"Take that back! That is SO not true!"

"Ugh!" Blossom looked around and put a hand to her heart. "You're lucky we're driving in a deserted residential zone. In normal circumstances you could have severely injured-"

"Blossom!" Buttercup shouted. "Cut the crap! You want to talk to me about how I handle my-" Buttercup cut herself off before she said the dreaded word 'boyfriend' and swallowed, "Butch" she replaced craftily before turning her attention back on the road. "Don't you dare tell me how I should deal with my...certain people."

"I'm sorry." Blossom rolled her eyes. "No, really, I'm sorry. Can we get to the club house now?"

Buttercup huffed and put her foot on the gas pedal. She noticed her sister looking strangely at her and snapped her attention back toward her pink sister. "What?" she put on the breaks again.

"He is acting pretty unusual. Maybe he is planning to crash my wedding." Blossom muttered.

"Yeah. You think?" Buttercup asked dryly.

"You know what you have to do, don't you?" Blossom suddenly said.

"Wha-? Me?" Buttercup whined.

"Make him drink this. You can mix it in his drink." Blossom said and passed something to Buttercup. It was a veil of grey liquid.

Buttercup recoiled instantly. "Antidote X?" she held out the veil at arm's length. Eyeing it in disbelief.

"Just a small dose, nothing to get upset over. It's mostly sleeping pills. He'll just get really sleepy." Blossom said. "He'll sleep through the wedding, and he can come to the after party with barely any druggy side effects. It's harmless."

"You're being serious." Buttercup hissed. "Blossom, this is pure genius and pure evil at the same time. This-" she held up the veil with its concoctions. "Is Mojo material."

"Oh stop." Blossom actually laughed lightly, "You're just saying that."

"THAT WASN'T A COMPLIMENT, BLOSSOM!" Buttercup yelled. "God! What the hell is wrong with you? Is getting married turning you into a psycho?"

"No." Blossom said coldly. "But you just proved to me that you're a major softy when it comes to Butch. This isn't antidote X, by the way, it's Professor's cough syrup." Blossom reached over to pluck the veil out of Buttercup's hand. "That can't fly during my wedding. I promise you, if Butch misbehaves, I do have an alternative plan, and I don't want you to interfere with that." Buttercup was just about to cut in, when Blossom kept talking, "-And I think Butch knows that I am one puff that doesn't like to get 'screwed over', no offense to you, BC." She said breezily.

Buttercup stared at Blossom in disbelief. "You're being a BITCH, Blossom."

Blossom realized her mistake a tad bit too late again. She rubbed her eyes. "I'm sorry. That was out of line."

"Damn right!" Buttercup hissed. "You know what? No. For that comment alone. I get to wear my green dress again. I need something in return for that major bitch-move. Fess up. What do I get?"

"Buttercup!" Blossom whined. "I said I was sorry."

"Sorry isn't going to cut it, brat." Buttercup hissed. "Fess up."

"Fine, you don't have to... you don't have to wear a bow, anymore."

Buttercup grit her teeth. "You were going to make me wear a fucking bow?"

"But you don't have to do that now!" Blossom said brightly. "Yay?"

"No, I need something more than that."

"Ugh... Ok, how about... how about you don't need to come to my wedding?"

Buttercup furrowed her brow, and balked. "What?"

"What with you COMPLAINING at everything I do-even though it's MY wedding!" Blossom shouted, and immediately started sobbing. "I can't have all of my bridesmaids except ONE wearing green, what are you completely selfish? People will be staring at YOU, and what about Bubbles? What about ME?"

"Blossom-"

"I want you to be part of my wedding because you're my sister and you're supposed to LOVE ME MORE THAN YOUR STUPID VILLAINOUS BOYFRIEND!"

"He's not my-Ok! Ok! You fucking win!" Buttercup shouted. "You big, brat! I hate you so much right now!" she finally pushed the car forward again. The two puffs didn't notice that two or three more cars had been catching up to them, and was slowing down themselves.

"Oh thank goodness I didn't put on my makeup yet. I can't keep crying whenever you disagree to one of my plans." Huffed the pink puff.

"No kidding." Buttercup grit her teeth, noticing Blossom calmly wiping her face of her 'tears'. Buttercup finally sighed, "So I guess what you're trying to say is if Butch ruins your wedding, you'll blame me."

"Essentially." Blossom said breezily.

"But he's grandpa's plus one." Buttercup whined.

"I already drilled grandpa on what to do if Butch gets out of control. But Grandpa doesn't have superpowers, so I expect you to support grandpa if Butch goes nuts. " Blossom said calmly. The way she said it had so many hidden messages that Buttercup felt tense again.

Buttercup furrowed her brows. "Seriously, Bloss... what did you tell him?" she said in a dreaded voice.

"Nothing!" Blossom hissed in annoyance. "Next left. Put your blinkers on." She snapped quickly.

Buttercup loudly started to grind her teeth.


A/N: I hope you're not completely hatin' on Blossom. You know, deep down, she's got a point. Blinkers are important.

To be continued.