Chapter 2: Shenanigans

It had been nearly four hours since we arrived to Japan. Ah, the land of the rising sun. I've heard this place had some pretty decent cuisine. Not sure if that's ditto for the pizza in this country though.

But if there's one thing I was looking forward to more than the food here... is the vast amount of girls. Oh, those hot Japanese girls in their skimpy little sailor outfits, not to mention when we hit the beaches. Oh, those swimsuits are so alluring...

"Get your head out of the gutters Dante..." My twin brother's demeaning and angry tone was like a harpoon through my thoughts. But were my intentions really that obvious?

"You were drooling and you had a spaced out look on your face," Shadow stated, reading my mind.

Well... that explains it.

"Er... well, we should probably find our escort," I said, trying to change the subject.

"Brother... our escort has been with us for six minutes now..." Vergil let out a big sigh, and Shadow shook his head.

"Geez old man, are you that stupid?" Nero jeered, and I tripped him in response. He yelped and fell flat on his face, evicting a slight chuckle out of our escort. Shadow just walked around the kid, and Vergil glared at me.

"If you three don't mind, we need to meet with our client in the next seven minutes. So I'd suggest you stop fooling around before he reduces our pay, or cancels the mission entirely." Vergil and I immediately shut up, though my brother was still glaring at me. Nero got back up, holding his bloodied nose and glaring at me as well.

I don't know why, but I'm starting to think that the other three don't like me.

We walked out of the airport and made our way towards the garage. "So, Shadow," I said to the currently-black-haired man in front of me, who turned his head slightly to acknowledge me. "What exactly is it that we're supposed to do here?"

Shadow turned away again, and simply said:

"No idea."

My eye twitched. Shadow always knew what was going on. Shadow always had a plan. For him to say 'no idea' like that was simply unheard of.

I couldn't think of anything to say other than: "...Wha?"

"Don't worry. Our client is a..." he paused, apparently trying to find the right word. "...frequent customer of mine whom I've come to know very well and can fully trust." Man, that must have been a mouthful.

"Oh, well that's good then," I said in a bored tone. I was relieved, to be honest. He almost completely shattered my reality; Shadow, not knowing anything and just winging it. All Hells will be unleashed before that happens.

We made our way to a limousine in the lobby, and our escort opened the door for us. He was silent the whole time, so I had forgotten he was even there.

I dropped into my seat, letting out a long sigh of comfort. Damn these seats were soft. I looked to my left and saw a man with unnaturally red hair staring right at me, one eyebrow raised ever so slightly. Seriously, does everyone need to be so reserved and calculated in every movement? At least the kid's got the right idea.

"Must you be so exuberant, little brother..." Vergil rubbed his brow. Nero shook his head and got in as well, followed by Shadow, whose deadpan expression never faltered.

I leaned forward and grinned at Shadow. "Why so serious, partner?" Just then, his expressionless face was broken with an annoyed frown. Mission accomplished.

"Well, if you're finished making blatantly obvious movie references, I'd like to brief you on your assignment, Son of Sparda," the man interjected as the car pulled out into the street.

The grin on my face faded, and I reclined into the seat. "Son of Sparda, eh?" I gazed at the man with a lazy expression. "Guess that means you're a demon, too."

"Yes, I am." Well, that explains the red hair. "I figured you wouldn't accept this case if you had known what I was, so I left that detail out." He then bowed as deeply as he could, considering we were sitting in a limo. "For that, I must apologize from the deepest recesses of my heart."

I stared at him from beneath my bangs, and found no inkling of deceit. Either he was skilled at lying, or he was being honest with me. I hope it's the former; I hadn't had any action in weeks.

"Alright, fair enough," I replied. The redhead let out a sigh I could barely hear, then continued. "I promise that I'm a decent guy, hence the assignment." He reached to his side and took out a folder from his briefcase. "By the way, my name is Julian Raiser, but just call me 'Julian'."

"Here's the deal: five months ago, I made a trip into Hell. And yes Mr. Redgrave, demons can do that, though they have to be a full-fledged devil and can't bring anyone or anything back to the Human Realm."

"Interesting," Vergil said, a slight smirk on his face. Both Shadow and I shot him a dirty look, letting him know what'll happen if he tries anything. He slumped into his seat, a very apparent scowl on his face. I swear, he's like Nero sometimes.

"While I was there, I heard rumors about a new devil emperor, who went by the name 'Constantine.' I didn't think much of this new emperor, but my curiosity got the better of me, and I decided to find out more about this demon."

He shook his head. "And it's a good thing I decided to investigate when I did. Turns out this Constantine character is not only a very powerful demon, but he knew Mundus on a personal level." Vergil and I sat up, concern on our faces. Mundus was involved in this?

"Talk about shit hittin' the fan, eh?" Julian said with a slight grin. I like this guy already. "Of course, I decided to turn my little inquiry into a full-time investigation, and after a few weeks of relentless research, my partners and I have come to a conclusion."

He handed the folder to me, and I skimmed through it, a frown growing ever so slightly on my face. Vergil looked over my shoulder, trying to get a better look, a frown forming on his face as well.

"Is this what you meant by 'Armageddon'?" Shadow asked the redhead.

"Correct. We have reason to believe that Constantine is trying to resurrect the former Prince of Darkness, and he's pouring a lot of power into whatever vessel or vessels he's using to do that... by the way, have I met you before?"

"Took you long enough to notice," Shadow replied in an slightly bemused tone.

The redhead's golden eyes widened. Wait, golden eyes? How did I miss that? "Shadow? Why are you here?"

Shadow snorted. "Nice to see you too, Julian."

Julian rasied an eyebrow. "Right... As I was saying, this is the part where your expertise comes in. We've found out that various demon magic 'hotspots' have been popping up on all four islands of Japan, the largest of which is easily about three times as large as the others, and situated in the center of Niohara, Kyushu."

Shadow raised an eyebrow. "Niohara? I've been to Japan a few times already, and I've never heard of it before."

"I'm not suprised. Usually you only bother to gather information about something that immediately concerns you, either for your job..." The redhead smirked. "Or that little harem of yours in Osaka." A harem, eh?

Shadow narrowed his eyes to slits. "I already told you, they were marionettes..."

(Author's Note: I plan on writing another story that involves Shadow and the "marionettes," if you know to whom I'm referring to.)

The car slowed to a stop at the hotel we were staying at for the first few days. Forgot the name of the place, but it's pretty luxurious. How Shadow manages to get these kinds of things is well beyond me.

Besides, I really doubt that I want to know.

We all piled out of the car, with Shadow still talking to Raiser and apparently ready to punch him. Really, I didn't care about what they were talking about anymore, 'cuz I heard enough to figure out what we needed to do.

"So, what exactly do we need to do?" Nero asked, scratching his head. Man, he's dense.

I shrugged. "I guess we have to investigate those "hotspots" he mentioned, and figure out what exactly this is all about and how it relates to whats-his-face and Mundus."

"Constantine," Vergil said, sounding slightly distracted. Guess he was planning our next step too.

"Yeah, that," I said. "But first we're gonna have to get to know the area better. Can't be going off to fight some devils and get lost in some back alley in who-knows-where."

Shadow had caught up to us by then, apparently finished with talking to his friend. Off by the limo, Julian was nursing a black eye. I couldn't help but feel sorry for him.

I'm sorry, did I say friend? I meant his "frequent customer whom is very trustful and I'm so cool, I don't need friends, or allies for that matter, I'm just a one-man mother fuckin' army who gives a thorough ass-paddlin' to anyone who looks remotely happier than myself..."

...Eh, kinda went off on a tangent there.

The four of us checked in, then took the elevator to the top level. Well, me, Vergil and Nero did; Shadow decided to sprint up the stairwell for some reason. He may not admit it, but that guy's nothin' but a big showoff.

When we got to our room, Shadow was already there. Go figure.

"You'd think you would be the one to know the meaning of 'low-key' Shadow," I said with an exasperated sigh. Shadow ignored me and started to unpack his bags. I gotta say, he didn't bring much. After all, didn't he himself say that this was a potentially dangerous mission? Yet he packs the least stuff...

He pulled out Pandora, and I immediately decided to keep my thoughts to myself.

"So, what's our first move gonna be, boss?" I stressed the last word 'cuz, well, he is the boss here, no matter how much no one wants to admit it. After all, without him I would still be in debt, Vergil would be dead and Nero... well, I don't know about him.

Yet Shadow gets pissed whenever I call him that. I wonder why?

"What you said in the lobby, about familiarizing ourselves with our environment," he said, once again donning his deadpan voice. Seriously, if you hate me, just be more forthcoming about it, like Nero or Verge.

"And I've figured out the perfect way to do that." Shadow turned to looked at us. "We're going shopping."

"... Who are you and what have you done with the real Shadow?" We all stated.

He continued unpacking, a subtle, annoyed look on his face. "If we go shopping, we'll be able to see how the citizens interact with one another, and not only will we be able to eventually blend in with the crowd, but it'll be much easier to find information around the city."

He looked up again, stared at us for about a second, and smirked. "Although, 'blend in' isn't the right term, what with your height and silver hair, but you get the point."

I crossed my arms. "I ain't wearin' a wig, if that's what you're saying," I said.

Vergil shook his head. "You are an imbecile, Dante." He then spoke to Shadow. "If that is the case, then why do we not we simply observe from afar? It will accomplish the same thing."

"True, but eventually you'd have to get new clothing, because I highly doubt you and Dante will be able to 'blend in' when you dress like... that." The hell was that supposed to mean?

"I see." Vergil seemed to understand, not responding to the obvious insult. Maybe he missed it entirely.

"Tomorrow we'll be heading to Shibuya. And I'd expect you all to be on your best behavior." He shot a menacing glare at me. Why me? Why not the kid? Sure, I act a little crazy at times, but I know how to control myself. Nero, however... is a teenager. That's all I have to say.

"Eh... okay then." I shrugged and let out a big yawn. "Well, if you don't mind, I'm gonna hit the sack. G'night, all." With that, I dragged my suitcase to my room, then jumped onto the bed and instantly fell asleep. You know, 'cuz jet lag is a bitch.


Ugh... Dante. Sometimes I'm not sure why I even put up with his antics.

I glared bullets into the ceiling as I struggled to go to sleep. I had stayed up a little longer, watching the brief fight between Nero and Vergil over who got the other spare room, and whom would sleep in the living room.

I promptly gut punched them and decided to make both of them sleep in the living area, and merely converted the other room into an armory, storing our Devil Arms and other weaponry.

Along with Yamato, Vergil brought Beowulf and Agni & Rudra, probably because those were the only weapons he has ever used, aside from Sparda.

But there was no fuckin' way I was gonna let him even touch that.

(Author's Note: I'm aware that Vergil's never used Agni & Rudra, but I think he has used Yamato and Force Edge together in DMC3, so A&R shouldn't have been to difficult for him to use. And really, why would anyone let him use Sparda?)

Nero brought Alastor and Lucifer alongside Red Queen and Blue Rose; a good choice, considering his skills with those rivaled Dante's and myself.

(Author's Note: Nero will be using Lucifer in a different way than that of Dante. I still have yet to decide how.)

Speaking of the silver-haired dumbass, he brought Rebellion, Ebony & Ivory, the Devil-Shot Gun, Gilgamesh and Nevan. Why he brought Nevan, I'll never know. Maybe the vast amount of demon energy in one place was what was keeping me up. It also didn't help that I was sleeping in the same room as the Devil Arms.

(Author's Note: The Devil-Shot Gun, which will now be referred to as the D-Shot, is a lever shotgun or whatever the hell it's called. I may have a picture of it p sometime.)

I just hope nothing else notices...

Something else was keeping me awake as well. It was the look on Julian's face. The others may not have noticed, but he was scared. Really scared. And for something to frighten someone like him is cause for concern.

I sighed, and distilled my conscience from my body, feeling the familiar expansion of my mind, no longer feeling the fatigue a living creature does, and was soon gazing upon my inert body. Now I was an ethereal being that only the most powerful of necromancers would be able to see.

In short, I became a ghost.

I drifted through the window and began to coast all around Japan, taking in the surrounding buildings, the districts, the people, everything. This is what I usually do whenever I "sleep."

I did that until sunrise, not ignoring the sensation I get whenever my body is disturbed. It was probably Dante, that jackass...

When I came back to the hotel, Dante was indeed pestering me, poking me with a knife. Why a frikin' knife?

I merged with my body once again, and immediately shot a fist upward, catching Dante underneath the chin. His head snapped backwards and he crashed into the glass coffee table, shattering it. Damn klutz.

I sat up and gazed at him with emotionless eyes. "Wake Vergil and Nero up. We're going to Shibuya. Be in the lobby in ten minutes." Those two slept like rocks, whereas Dante was a very light sleeper. "Light" as in he will wake up if you breathe louder than normal. Makes sense as to why he was the one poking me with a knife, and not Vergil. Of all people, why would he be the most alert?

"Why... now?" Dante groaned, rubbing his chin. I stood up and put on my trenchcoat, grabbed my wallet, and walked out the door without another word. When I got to the lobby, a black motorcycle with red streaks was parked outside. Good, my S-Cycle got through okay. I swung a leg over it and placed a thumb on the I.D. pad, then revved it up and took off to check up on our "home" in Noihara.


3 hours later...

"...And that's how I kicked Mundus's ass!" Dante said, and rather loudly too. Everyone on the tour bus looked at us funny, and I had to struggle to prevent myself from smashing his face in. He was telling Nero about his endeavors on Mallet Island, the word "subtle" clearly having no significance on his actions.

"Dante, these people don't know about demons, so shut you trap!" Nero hissed quietly.

And that's when it happened.

"Mundus? Isn't that the previous ruler of the Demon World…?" The voice was soft, very soft, but the four of us heard it. And immediately after the last words were uttered, three icy blue gazes and one blood red gaze focused on the speaker.

It was a little girl. She had black hair and brown eyes, and was wearing red yukata that stopped just above her knees. And from the looks of it, she was frightened. "Ah… ah…"

It took me a few seconds to remember what Julian had told me while the others went to check in.


"Right, now I should probably tell you this before you go and shoot everyone who knows about demons." Shadow clenched a fist. "Hey, don't do anything rash..."

"Now why would I do that?" Shadow tried to ask with an innocent voice. It came out cold and menacing instead, making Julian pale.

"I'm serious man, just hear me out. This region, Noihara, is filled with demons, and they play a pretty big part in society there. So don't go homicidal when you hear someone talking about a powerful demon or something, got it?"

Shadow nodded. "I'll keep that in mind."

"And while you're at it, try not to blow off the case to go check up on your 'harem', alright?"

Shadow delivered a swift right hook to Julian's face.


Julian. Sometimes he can be an asshole.

I tried to holster my gun before the girl noticed, but ultimately failed. She paled when a ray of light gleamed off the silver barrel of my weapon, and shuffled a good four feet from us. Everyone on the bus noticed.

...Shit.

The bus pulled over and slowly came to a halt, and the operator came in the back, a frown on his face.

"Alright, what's going on here?" he said in a heavily accented English.

"That man has a gun!" cried the girl. I raised an eyebrow as the operator... grinned.

Why the hell did he grin?

"A concealed weapon, eh? Well, that just means I'll have to subdue you and your... cohorts." He gestured towards the three stooges, who looked perplexed.

I shook my head. "That won't be necessary. We'll just get off the bus." I tried to stand up, but the operator held me down.

"Oh, I don't think so, mister..." In a single millisecond, I launched my left arm upwards, catching him under the chin with an open palm and sending him sprawling to the floor. "Let's go," I said to the three idiots, stepping over the stunned operator. I could feel the fearful gazes following us as we exited the bus, and it was beginning to annoy me.

"So, what do we do now?" Dante asked as the bus drove away a little too quickly. "Someone's likely to call the cops, and that girl with probably tell her devil friends about us..."

"This would not have occurred had someone kept control over his irrational impulses," Vergil muttered.

Dante has a triumphant grin stretch across his face. "See? Even Verge here agrees wi-"

"I was referring to YOU, Dante!" Vergil snarled. His outburst scared a few passing teenagers, who started to stare. I pinched the bridge of my nose and sighed. Here we go.

"WHAT ARE YOU PATHETIC EXCUSES FOR SENTIENT BEINGS STARING AT?" he roared, scaring them away.

I'd say something but I can't, otherwise I'd look like a hypocrite. I hasn't been long since I stopped acting like that.

"Geez, Verge, no need to get your panties in a bunch..." Dante remarked. "Even though it was Shadow's fault..."

"No it was not you imbecile," Vergil was starting to move towards Dante, white light beginning to slowly form around his arms and legs. "If you had chosen to dissist from that incessant rambling of yours on the bus, or at the very least lowered the volume of your voice, then this would not have occurred!"

"Look, guys, we're in public, so maybe we should-"

Nero ducked as Vergil tried to kick him in the face.

"Do NOT belittle me, you arrogant worm!" Vergil spat, almost literally. He then turned back to Dante, who was trying to tip-toe away. "And YOU!" He grabbed his brother by the back of his coat's collar and slammed him into the ground. "You will not be going ANYWHERE!"

He was starting to get that echo in his voice again. I had to stop this now.

"Vergil, if you do anything rash, you'll most likely alert our adversaries to our presence," I said in an even tone. "And if you compromise this mission, I promise you that you will live the rest of your days in torment."

Vergil rounded on me next, but he must have seen that I was completely serious, for he hesitated for a moment. But only for a moment.

"So, you have chosen to defend these little... little... humans!" I moved a hand to cover a massive smile that broke across my face. Was that really the best insult Vergil could come up with? Behind the blue-clad devil, Nero snickered, whereas Dante just looked confused.

"Verge...Why... did you call us 'human,' of all things?" the devil hunter said.

He screamed in frustration and performed a Lunar Phase on Dante, connecting with his jaw and sending him straight through a nearby wall.

"AND STOP CALLING ME 'VERGE!' THAT IS NOT MY NAME!" he yelled.

Dante didn't get back up. Smart move.

"Vergil! What the hell is wrong with you? We're supposed to be staying under the radar!" Nero cried, astonished by the agression.

"That plan had been shot to hell the instant that twerp opened his mouth!" He pointed a shaking finger at the prone form of Dante.

"You cause more trouble than Dante, for cryin' out loud!" Nero yelled, mainly out of fear.

Sirens could be heard off in the distance. "Great, now we have to deal with the authorities! Do you know what they do to people who look like me?" Nero started to panic.

"If you refuse to keep quiet I will force you to do so!" Vergil yelled.

I sighed. Why did it seem like Japan always brought out the worst in people?


Well, that's Chapter 2. I seem to be having problems writing in a consistent tense while I write in the first person. Therefore, I will most likely start writing in the third person.

Unless, of course, you'd prefer I continue writing the way I have.

Next chapter will focus on the "Omamori Himari" crew, and their life after the anime. And for those who have seen the anime, I can assure you that Yuto will be much less of a pansy. Seriously, he's the one thing that pissed me off among everything else. That and the last episode. So anticlimatic.