Chapter Two

Katrina pulled up in front of Caledonia High School in Glasgow. She safely guided her car into a space without crashing into anybody's car. Kat had lived in Glasgow all her life except she was born in Inverness. Kat's best friend, Jilly, rushed over to her, just after she had opened her car door.

" Hey, KAT, guess what?"

" Mrs. Morrison has been abducted by aliens?"

" No. But-"

" My sister has a boyfriend?"

Jilly laughed. "You know she has no eyes for anybody else but the lovely Robert Montgomery. Anyway, guess who got asked out this morning by John MacAuthur?"

" Uh, you?"

" The very person." Kat gasped.

" And you said?"

" No."

" Jilly, how could you? You've had a crush on him for years!"

" He's still dating Siobhan. I'm not dating any two-timer, even if he is the school heart-throb."

" Jilly, you are such a silly bum. He dumped Siobhan yesterday. You just turned the biggest boy chance in your history."

" I actually said Yes."

" You're kidding, right?" asked Kat.

" Yeah. Sorry. But you fell for it. Again." Both girls cracked up.

" That was so Déjà vu. How many times do you have to trick me?"

" Lots!"

" So anyone on the horizon yet, Jilly?"

" Maybe the new guy."

" We have a new guy?"

" Yep. A Mr. Patrick MacIntosh."

" How do you know his name already, if he only came today?"

" I got a message from main office. We've got to look after him."

" But how do you know who he is."

" Ah, Jilly is not silly," she said tapping her nose.

" Jilly!" Kat whined.

" There's a photo attached."

" Let me see." Asked Kat.

" That's him, over there, according to the photo."

" Oh, shit!" said Kat looking over and grimacing.

" Kat, what is it?"

" Um, I, um."

" What did you do Kat?" asked Jilly, looking down her nose at Kat.

" I, uh, almost ran him over yesterday."

" Kat!" burst Jilly.

" He was checking out my car. It's my car. No one can touch it but me. He was running his hand over the bonnet. It was parked over at the library."

" Kat." Said Jilly disapprovingly, " What were you doing at the library?"

" Have you forgotten? We have an English test today. I was checking up on that William guy."

" Shakespeare?"

" That might be him."

" Oh well. We better catch up with that Patrick, before he goes for help."

" Okay."

Chapter Three

Patrick looked around in amusement when he saw the girl who nearly ran him over yesterday, running over to him.

" Well, well. Who do we have here?"

" Sorry 'bout yesterday." Kat said in a proud Glasweigin accent. " We're to look after you." She pointed to Jilly, who was calmly walking towards them.

" I'm Katrina. I prefer Kat. That is Jilly. My best friend. You are Patrick, right?"

" Yeah. I'm Patrick. Why are you to look after me?"

" Well, not exactly look after you. We got other things to do as well as this."

" What she means is that we're to show you around. You need to go to main office to get your timetable. We'll take you," said Jilly.

" Oh, okay. Should I be worried?"

" About what?"

" The separate groups around here?"

" Ah. We'll show you on the way."

" Okay."

Jilly and Kat passed the trendies. " These are the people you would want to hang out with if you like straight leg trousers, mini-skirts and cheesy tops. Oh, and tracksuit-bums and Nike or Adidas stuff." Said Kat.

They passed a crowd guys with short spiky/long hair and girls with spiky hairstyles, in long baggy trousers, with skateboards under their arms or underneath them. " These are the Skaters, hence the skateboards. They are pretty cool, and their type of music is pretty like our type," said Jilly.

" And these are the Bob Marleys'. They like Afro's and Bob Marley music. They also like the Whalers, that's the group that sang with Bob Marley. They are a bit obsessed." Said Kat, they were taking the speaking in turns.

" And we have the geeks and freaks. They don't mind us calling them that. They love science, swotting, chess and studying various types of bird or bug."

" Finally, there's me, Jilly, Carly, Johnny, Ketchup, Chloe, Chris and Mikey. We're the individuals. Hence our weird hats, stripy socks, bright coloured, baggy trousers and cool shoes, wacky tops and freaky, but very cool hairstyles. You can hang with us if you don't want to join in with the rest. We normally meet by the school gates at break and lunchtime so we can get to the café across the road early, that one there," Jilly said pointing at a small café across the road. " 'Smileys'. Very cool crowd in there, I can get you a discount, my dad runs the place."

" Oh, and don't dis the name, my little sister named it, and I don't like people teasing her. If they do, they normally get kicked up the ass by me, Jilly or Graham."

" So basically if I dis your sister, I'm not saying I will, you'll kick me in the balls."

" You're catching on fast Ozzy." Said Kat.

" My name is Patrick."

" Sorry, Patrick. I get a little carried away. You've got a nice voice by the way." Kat blushed.

Patrick was a little puzzled about the comment but he replied a calm, "Thanks."

" This is the main office, do you want us to wait for you?"

" Um, uh, okay, thanks."

While Patrick was in the office collecting, or rather copying out his timetable, Kat spotted Chris and the rest of their gang across the masses of people near the office. Jilly waved them over.

" What are you guys doing over here? This isn't our usual spot!" said Ketchup.

" We have to look after the new guy. Being responsible 6th years now." Said Kat.

" All of us?" asked Chris.

" If you want." Said Jilly.

" Does this guy have a name?" asked Chloe.

" Patrick MacIntosh."

" Is he cute?" asked Carly, her spiky hair in sharp points.

" Trust you to ask that. Her watch where you put that hair Carly! You could poke some-one's eye out!"

" Sorry! I only asked. Anyway, Lori put too much hairspray in my hair this morning. Not my idea of fun, believe me." Lori was Carly's little sister, Bianca's best friend.

" So what does he look like?" asked Johnny.

" Uh, we got a picture, uh." Said Jilly from searching deep in her bag before finally pulling out his picture. " Here."

The door of the main office creaked open and Patrick came out

" Finally!" sighed Kat. " We thought you might have been abducted by aliens."

" Don't mind Kat, she's obsessed with aliens, she even went to Roswell in New Mexico to discover there was no such place anymore." Said Ketchup. " I'm Ketchup by the way. Real name's Kristoph, but I hate it, so don't let me hear you callin' me that."

" Okay. Uh, nice to meet you." Patrick sized up the crown who were all introducing themselves to him.

Ketchup, was a pretty, tall guy, with long hair down to his shoulders, it was bright red. Hence the name. Blue eyes, thick eyebrows and light red lips. He had a bright, sky blue hat on with a red lightening strike down the side of it. He wore long, blue baggy trousers and a long Korn T-shirt. His shoes weren't seen, but Patrick could see his white shoe-laces dragging behind them as they all walked Petrick to his, Ketchup's and Carly's registration class.

Carly had dark brown, short, spiky hair as sharp as needle points. Her eyes were a striking green, she had well toned cheek bones and a pouted mouth. She was wearing an orange flared skirt with hot pink and purple stripy socks. She had a hot pink strappy top on with a lilac croche top over the top. She wore fang earrings and yellow trainers.

Johnny was a tall, well-built guy with short dyed-blonde hair, in a bowl- cut. He had dark brown eyes and a dashing smile. He was wearing a long baggy red and blue dragon shirt, with a dark blue long-sleeved top underneath. He wore baggy trousers the same kind as Ketchup's but they were pitch black.

Chloe was really so unlike the rest. She looked like a Trendy turned Bufty, but the better side of un-original. She had on an opal purple long denim skirt and a stripy multi-coloured three-quarter length sleeved top. Her make-up was normal but striking. Her eyes were a piercing blue and her lips were bright pink. Her hair was in beaded dreadlocks and was tied back into a loose pink ribbon.

Kat was almost the same as Carly, as with Jilly, except both Jilly and Kat had baggy trousers and long flowing blonde hair that flew over their shoulders. Kat's hair was tied back with two maid-Marian type pleats tied in a blue ribbon.

Mikey and Chris wore practically the same as Johnny, except they both had different types of shirts on, and different coloured trousers.

" Guys, guess what Bianca got sent last night by the lovely, Robert?"

" A chain letter?" asked Chloe.

" Even better." Kat reached into her bag and took out a piece of A4 paper, with lots of writing particularly in the centre of the page. All the group looked over Kat's shoulder's for a peek. The text ran like this:



Can I get up in the world?

I, the penis, hereby request a raise in salary for

the following reasons:

I do physical labor.

I work at great depths.

I plunge head first into everything I do.

I do not get weekends off or public holidays.

I work in a damp environment.

I don't get paid overtime.

I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.

I work in high temperatures.

My work exposes me to contagious disease.

Thank you for considering my request.

The Penis

:-)))



Dear Mr. Penis,

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments

you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the

reasons:

You do not work 8 hours straight.

You fall asleep on the job after brief work periods.

You do not stay in your allocated position, and often visit

other areas.

You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and

stimulated in order to start working.

You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.

You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as

wearing the correct protective gear.

It's doubtful you'll work until the normal retirement age of

65.

You're unable to work double shifts

You sometimes leave your allocated position before you have

completed the day's work.

And if that were not all, you have been seen

constantly entering and leaving the workplace carrying 2

suspicious looking bags.

Sincerely,

The Management

God

Everyone gasped. "That cheeky wee bugger!" exclaimed Johnny and Chloe at the same time.

Please Review. MandELLA, I hope this is enough plot for you. TBC Shortly..