Chapter Two: Getting Older


The Inn was eerily silent.

The noise of my keys jangling together inside my pocket echoed hollowly; almost a guilty sound. I cleared my throat to disguise the discomfort. One small lamp lit at a table in the corner and Angela was seated, looking no less immortalized in ambiguity than she had amongst the greenish glow of the fireflies.

I dawdled in the kitchen, reclaiming some amount of poise to heat some cocoa with the least amount of clatter. It was a quiet week but upstairs an assortment of guests slept and dreamed soundlessly, and I didn't want to disturb them. I passed the warm mug to Angela and watched her lily-white fingers wrap about the ceramic as she seemed to sigh.

"So," I began. Being the first to pluck up the courage to speak inside these muted walls provided me some relief. "You can relax now. Stay here for the night."

Her eyes darted about my face like she had some valiant argument, but in the end she dipped her head to the chocolate and drank. Afterwards some liveliness had returned to her expression; something I was more content to remember.

"You haven't changed," she offered quietly. A smile twitched at the corner of my lips.

"You're looking at the cook and captain of this fine establishment actually."

She was unfailingly impressed; wide eyes sparkling, "No way."

"Well, there's still a little paperwork to go... but I've been overseeing the lot for a couple of months now."

"Is Jake okay?" she whispered knowingly, until the grin I was trying to hide was seduced from me.

"What are you implying?"

As the hush descended between our silences my questions for her span wildly, but I restrained myself anew; I knew her, and she was in no state to give me the eloquent answers I desired. And whether I agreed with it or not seven years could make once-friends into strangers. Angela might not tell me anything despite my attempts at rescue.

There was always time tomorrow for the necessary small talk.

"Come on, I'll show you your room."

A quick reminder from the guestbook left me without worries: no one out of the ordinary, and mostly travellers. Angela wouldn't stand out, nor would she be hounded at any point in the early morning for her life story. I would fill Maya in on the details and we could house her until she was comfortable.

With only one dimly lit lamp it shouldn't have surprised me that she slipped on the lacquered steps. It was a base reaction to loop one arm about her waist to steady her and before either of us could make a sound she was breathing heavily and tight against my side. Another time and another instance I might've shouted, let go, and made a condescending remark about her habits, but today had been strange from the start; my heart hammered and my mind reeled. I soothed myself that no damage was done and pushed her ahead.

"Careful..."

The empty room was like the others, sliding doors, tatami squares, and modest furniture burnished with a dark wood stain. The accents of orange and red were lost to the darkness but it wasn't foreboding in any way. The inn was old, but there had never been any cost spared at keeping it exquisite. I couldn't tell whether Angela took in any of these familiar details or not. She stepped in and instantly fell upon the bed.

"Towels here, baths around the corner," I motioned briefly, "I'll be back for breakfast."

"Do you still live by the lake?"

"Of course," I grumbled under my breath. The idea of leaving my cottage still didn't sit right.

She paused. "Thank you Chase."

Among the residents that knew her there were those that would explain her success without reluctance. It was the sort of information I dismissed much the same as that of astrology; I just didn't believe in it. The science was flawed if there was any, and the interference of faerie and goddess was something too whimsical to swallow without a great amount of contest. Even after the girl seemingly materialized out of nowhere and roused a fanfare of significant beetles I was sceptical to accept any of it.

But here lying on a bed I knew thread for thread she seemed ephemeral; no sign of the telltale farmer's tan or calluses on her fingertips, and her eyes were so very sunken. Even if I didn't believe I wondered desperately what had happened to her, and hoped more sincerely than I would admit that she might confide in me.

"Get some rest," I ordered, but she was already asleep.


Once again, I was rudely awoken by a pillow to my nose. This time there'd been no shadow of a doubt that I was asleep, and immovable, I would remain that way until my body clock caught up with itself.

I groaned.

"Up and at 'em, lazy bones! I'll forgive you for breakfast, but if you don't get dressed in five minutes you'll have a handful of people that won't be as understanding."

The attraction of pulling the covers over my head was almost too tempting to ignore. From the corner of one bleary eye I could make out the time at barely three hours since I'd finally reached my bed. Apparently Maya was none the wiser to my excessively late return. It marked the least amount of sleep I'd had in a decade and it made me feel old.

"up, up, up, up!" Maya stripped the quilt from me; the morning air immediately chilling my over-warm skin.

Without coffee (even the Maya Special Brew) I struggled to match her stride as she scurried with my hand tight in hers. My mind was far from berating her overabundance of energy though; I already stuck amongst the pots and pans. A man's mind was a precise cutting edge, but today it was comparable to little more than a soggy dishrag.

"Helloo," A wave tore through my convenient cooking puns.

"Hm?"

She sighed, "I said: It's already unlocked."

Once I'd caught her gaze I noticed the grim seriousness in her expression. It was out of place amongst the sky blue of her eyes, the gentle flush of her cheeks, and the inherent rosiness of her slim lips.

Suddenly I was completely awake.

"I unlocked it last night." I answered, sounding a bit dazed.

"Why?" she quirked her head like a little bird, the seriousness dissolving instantly once she snapped her fingers. "Is it a surprise?"

Looking up at the big looming walls, my laugh was surprisingly void of any irony. "Sure is."

Maya's routine kept her out of my hair for a good hour. Like a humming bird she was a consistent buzz of activity and poorly executed pop songs. Similarly, in the kitchen, I baked my pre-made rolls and crafted a traditional breakfast buffet. It was this perfect synchronicity that had allowed us to succeed the Inn so lucratively. We were surprisingly like-minded. Maya had completely negated her parents and even my own reservations with unexpected and sophisticated self-assurance. With just that single person willing to stand at my side regardless of what might be thrown at her there was suddenly a world of opportunity and achievement open at my feet.

But as I knead and cut, and whisked and glazed, this was not the appreciation forefront on my mind. I was working nervously, wondering how I would approach Angela, and growing increasingly grateful for every minute of solitude the routine continued to allow.

After another moment I considered waking her; the idea that this action might be overly familiar was brushed away the same as the flour that decorated my sleeves. In my purpose I turned on my heel and nearly collided with the very person. The yelp of my surprise was clumsy and undignified, and I clamped a hand over my mouth. She laughed unabashedly.

"Jumpy aren't you?"

Angela stood pleasantly close, her arms crossed behind her back and her slim physique prominent.

"It's not often I'm snuck up on in my own kitchen," I calmed myself by smoothing my apron. Angela didn't seem convinced.

"Did you forget about me?"

It was a startling question; caught somewhere between playful and sincere. Whereas, as a rule, I would bounce back with some thinly veiled observation I was forestalled. Somewhere hidden behind her naturally cheerful countenance she honestly wanted to know if these years had passed and my memories had gone along with them. I sidestepped it without a second thought.

"Of course not, I was just coming to check on you."

She hardly blinked. On tiptoes she raised herself to see over my shoulder and inspect my work, her smile unfurling like butterfly's wings. "I'm actually really hungry now. Weird."

The feeling that replaced my expected gratitude that she hadn't pressed the question was all wrong.

'Weird,' she had said.

"Sit and wait like everyone else. And while you're at it, maybe you could fill me in on one or two of the details relating to your suspicious midnight stopover."

I turned back to my stove, flipping omelette, but not before I caught the blush that rose to her cheeks.

"It's not suspicious!" She dropped onto a bar stool heavily, her elbows clacking on the countertop. "It was just...impromptu."

"A fancy word for suspiciously unplanned," I deadpanned, "Why now?"

It hardly passed for a conversation, but already it seemed that time had done nothing to change our behaviour. Remembering jut how it used to easily unfold into a battle of wit and how, exhausted, she would quickly change the subject elicited another lopsided sort of smirk from me.

She snorted, surprisingly closer to breaking point than memory served. "I've never been here so early before, it's really relaxed. But I can see the new landlord hasn't bothered to redecorate."

"It's a little thing called tradition." I served her up a special portion of the assorted foods. "Some people respect it."

Angela grinned again. It was an intensely bright smile and it caught me off guard. In that smile I felt like she was amused for the same reasons I had been, that she was pleased in redirecting my attention, but more than that she seemed to see through each of my actions. Like a book well read, she knew all of my secrets.

"Thanks for the food!" she clapped her hands together once before digging her fork in deeply.

I wasn't about to let her loose with so little explanation, but the happy fact that I could still bind her with food satisfied me for now. While she was under my roof she'd have to come clean. Upstairs the guests were rising, and in the back room I heard Maya approaching clumsily with an armload of fresh linen. Unbidden and panicky, I was suddenly pierced with shame that I hadn't explained the situation to her yet. I rushed out to help.

"Phew!" she puffed an upward breath that scattered her messy fringe out of her eyes. "Thank you."

From the stairwell a dishevelled Selena appeared with a blanket still wrapped about her shoulders and yawning like a cat. She was shortly followed by smattering of others I couldn't name and Jin's distant cousin, also a physician. Not one to waste a moment, Maya hastily retrieved the bedding from me and made a hustle for the stairs.

I caught her arm. "I'll do that, you go and say hello."

From her seat Angela pricked expectantly, brushing stray rice from her cheek.

"Don't be silly, you're working too," she whacked my shoulder playfully.

"Go and catch up with our surprise guest," I clarified, towing her close again by the wrist. Angela appeared to be growing increasingly awkward at the bar; fidgeting with her shirt sleeve and eyes darting as though she wasn't sure to carry on waiting in anticipation or continue shovelling down her food while it was warm. I turned my wife with some subtlety, and Angela prepared a smile.

The amusement had drained from Maya's face.

"Chase, I think this is another one of your jokes that I don't get and we're busy. Come on," she pleaded. That lit a spark.

"Look I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but there just wasn't a good chance. If this is about breakfast again I will cook you a banquet come Sunday."

"What? But I-"

"I ran into her last night. Seems that after so long she actually managed to get lost here." I fixed one of my most charming smiles and forced a light chuckle hoping this would distract Maya from being hurt; my patience was thinning but I wasn't about to embarrass us by creating a scene.

Casting my mind back, I couldn't find any reason that Maya would begrudge Angela room and board. No special moments of disregard for each other, no hasty insults; if anything they'd always seemed to get along quite famously. Kathy and Selena included them both in their evening rendezvous for a cheeky cocktail, and they would gladly haul each other home long after lock-down when one or the other could no longer walk. Had there been something I couldn't know? Something that might have even driven Angela away? I immediately dismissed the idea. Maya showed no shadow of guilt any more than the evident distress that I was keeping her from her duties.

The rest of the occupants had filtered into the room and began their carefree morning routines; pleasant small talk punctuated by the squeak of fork on porcelain. The increased buzz of activity made me all the more eager to return to the kitchen.

"Sorry Angela," I called over my shoulder, hoping I could leave it to her from here.

"W-who?" Maya squawked.

"Angela," I heaved a sigh, replying coolly. Even after three years of marriage I didn't realize she might be this chronically forgetful. Was I meant to worry over some accidental head trauma?

"But Chase!" She cried, catching my attention again as I was turning away. Her hands covered her mouth as if she'd surprised even herself by the volume. After a moment she let them drop.

"There's no one else here but us."


A smirk, a snort, everything sounding very distant; like a drop in the sea, "Of course," I said.

Maya looked more perplexed than anything, lips pursing in question. I steered casually back toward the kitchen and saw the bar, deserted, a plate of breakfast hardly even rearranged with the fork placed neatly at its side. Somehow I wasn't surprised; the taste of bitterness was familiar to me. In one fluid movement I captured two eggs and broke them across the skillet. The immediate hiss and smell of cooking placated me, until I was easily engrossed. The clock moved outside of my peripherals.

"Yeah."

"And table three."

"Yeah."

"And the barrels."

"Yeah."

A bang, "Chase, you've been wiping that glass for an hour now. Are you listening to me at all?" Kathy, who had finally had enough of my transparent mood, had slapped her cleaning rag down on the counter next to me. Her mouth was pinched in disapproving but her eyes wore undisguised concern.

"Not really." I replied in honestly, a fresh-faced smile slipping across my lips. She leaned into her hip and put a hand to her seductively bared waist.

"I figured as much," she sighed. "Take a break." Behind her Hayden's eyes glinted watchfully. Hayden and I had a perfectly amicable working relationship. At the inn we could make convenient small talk, offer a hand when things got busy, and even crack a joke, but outside of that I understood that he didn't entirely trust me. He was of island-born ilk, and I lied with my smiles. That marked me an outsider.

"Alright," I surrendered, relinquishing my towel and mug as though they'd been dangerous weapons in my hands. I passed Maya silently and she let me go.

Through the backdoor behind the inn, the stars glittered murkily behind quick moving cloud cover. It would have been the perfect atmosphere for a reflective cigarette if only I smoked, but the evidence of a gradual effect on the taste buds was compelling enough even as a child. But it didn't stop be from becoming curious as a smoker's expression relaxed after a long drag. Instead I settled with emptying my lungs and sucking in a great breath of summer humidity.

Was I bothered? I guessed my actions probably spoke for themselves. After being so forceful with Maya, getting left in the lurch did not sit well. Now I would have to somehow muster an apology. Still, what bothered me more wasn't Angela running off in the midst of introduction, but rather the way the introduction had played out. Something was off.

"So here's where I find you." The tall grasses whispered around her ankles. I didn't look up, instead feeling resentment well in the pit of my stomach.

"Back for another free meal?"

"I guess I deserved that." She winced.

"What the hell, Angela?" I turned my face enough to catch her eyes. "It's not like you have any reason to feel guilty."

"No," she agreed while smiling sadly. Her arms wrapped around herself until she seemed to wane. "But haven't you figured it out yet?"

"Figured what out exactly," I returned evenly, but a tendril of fear had snaked inside my chest and caused my heart to skip.

"I couldn't meet Maya because

I'm not really here."


A/N: I feel like...not a lot happened here. I can't tell you how difficult the second chapter has been and how much I didn't expect it to be when I first planned this fic. It still seems to squeak here and there, but a lot of it is simply the lead up to better things.

Thanks to everyone who put this on alert after the first chapter! Let me know what you think.

And SPECIAL THANKS to Rexy aka R/X on the Ushi no Tane forums who gave me some wonderfully constructive criticism on the first chapter that's helped me edit this one. I really enjoy writing these things but there's always, always room for improvement, and the talented Rexy doesn't hold back where you need it! If I'm lucky, she's reading this now (and noticing all of my habitual mistakes XD)

Chapter three will be a much quicker instalment now that the way is paved. I hope you'll return for it!