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Eclipse
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As soon as the bell from their class had rung and Haru and Momiji had just walked out the door Tohru began calling their names and waving frantically from down the hall. Haru shook his head.
"She shouldn't do that, she looks like a complete idiot." Haru was going to say more when he looked at Momiji and saw the small boy answering the girl in the same fashion of arm waving and yelling. Haru hit his forehead with his hand and began walking towards Tohru, who was now flanked by Kyo and Yuki (Uo was playing hookie to get out of a test and Hana was forced to go the library for study hall because of supposedly 'attacking fellow students'); Momiji trailing behind him.
"Hi Momiji! Hi Haru!" Momiji began bouncing around again as soon as Tohru greeted him.
"Hiya Tohru!" Kyo and Haru both rolled their eyes at how easily excited the girl and the rabbit were. Haru merely raised an arm in greeting.
The small group headed out to the roof, one of their favourite spots to eat lunch. They began eating and chatting excitedly with the occasional snide comments exchanged between Kyo and Yuki. Haru didn't talk much; he just didn't feel like it. He was content to listen to the others. He caught Momiji looking at him worriedly a few times but would flash him a quick smile and the rabbit would seem satiated. In truth, the cow had a lot on his mind. He had recently been forced to see Akito and had definitely come out the worse for wear. Haru hated talking to the Soma family's leader. Akito always hurt him, not physically, no nothing as simple as that. He always attacked Haru mentally. He would say Haru was slow and stupid; say he wasn't safe to be around other people, that he was dangerous. By the end of his sessions with Akito, Haru almost believed that all he did was hurt people, that he was a monster and a freak. These train of thoughts always made him so depressed he wanted to die; he had taken to cutting a few months ago. The brief release of emotion he felt as the blood ran from his cuts made him feel human again.
Until that morning, Haru had managed to hide his self abuse from everyone, even Akito. It was almost ironic how Haru could hide it from the one person that seemed to be able to read his mind and yet Momiji, the happy-go-lucky rabbit would be the one to see his scars. The cow sighed. He really hadn't meant to hurt or frighten his cousin. He had told the boy the truth when he said he had freaked out. Haru's instincts had taken hold. He was sorry now, of course. The rabbit had only been worried about him and wanted to help. It wasn't his fault. The cow was jolted from his thoughts when he heard Tohru scream. He looked to see the girl about to fall over the edge of the wall that put up a barrier between the roof and a sudden drop. Before anyone else could act Yuki, being closet, grabbed her waist, pulled her back to safety, and...transformed. Tohru immediately began to get overly upset and apologize exuberantly. She was so busy with her apologizing she didn't notice Yuki's shirt, which had landed on the top of the small wall, getting blown off it.
"Yuki! Your shirt!" said Momiji pointing to the wall as the last long sleeve began to slide. Tohru tried to grab it but failed and simply ended up staring after the shirt. Suddenly with a 'poof' Yuki was standing in front of everyone, utterly naked.
"Don't turn around quite yet Miss Honda." Yuki spoke quite calmly for someone who had just been doomed to walk around shirtless. Once Yuki had pulled on what remained of his clothes he looked over the wall dismally at his shirt that was now stuck in a tree.
"I'm so sorry Yuki! Now you don't have a shirt." Tohru looked positively frantic now.
"It's quite alright Miss Honda. Better my shirt over that wall then you." When Tohru failed to calm down Kyo stood up.
"Will 'ya calm down already? Look, I'll go get the damn shirt okay?" Tohru looked up at him hopefully.
"But how will you find it? You'll never be able to on the ground and-," Kyo cut her off.
"I'll climb the tree, stupid." Without another word Kyo had jumped to the tree and begun scrambling down.
"See Miss Honda, no harm done." said Yuki as he sat down to await Kyo. Tohru didn't answer however, but stared at Yuki's chest in dismay. Seeing her looking Momiji and Haru looked as well, Haru almost falling over. The rat's chest was covered in pink scars. It seemed almost as littered as Haru's own.
"Yuki! What happened to you? Are you okay? Do you need to see a doctor?-," Yuki shook his head and cut her off.
"No, no, I'm quite alright Miss Honda. They're only scars; all of them are quite old. Don't worry." Tohru's eyes were still wide.
"How did you get them? There's so many!" Yuki smiled at her sadly.
"I'm afraid I used to have a very dangerous habit." If possible, Tohru's eyes went wider.
"You mean, you mean you did that to yourself?" The girl's voice came out as more of a squeak.
"Unfortunately I did. But please don't be upset. Like I said, it's been quite along time since I even contemplated doing anything of the sort. There's no need for you to get all distressed." Tohru nodded hesitantly but Haru was still staring at him and Momiji was staring at Haru. Noticing Haru's eyes on him Yuki turned towards him.
"Haru?" The boy looked so shocked and so frightened Yuki was surprised.
"I-I..." Suddenly Haru jumped to his feet and sprinted to the door and off the roof. Yuki looked at him, surprise showing on his face.
"I wonder what's wrong with Haru. It isn't like him to get so worked up, even over something like this." Momiji was staring at the door Haru had run out of, as if he was fighting the urge to run after the cow. He looked so worried Yuki frowned.
"Momiji, do you know what's wrong with Hatsuharu?" The rabbit's head snapped around so fast his hat fell off, his eyes wide and scared. Yuki's frown deepened and he put a hand on the younger boy's shoulder. "Momiji, if you have any idea what's troubling Haru you should tell me. It could be serious and you might not realize it." Momiji was shaking his head emphatically.
"I said I wouldn't tell! I can't! I can't tell you!" Now it was Tohru's turn to look worried.
"Momiji, if you know something you really should tell Yuki-kun. He can help Haru if it's something bad. I'm sure Haru won't be mad at you for wanting to help him. Is he sick? He looked very pale." Momiji shook his head, wanting desperately to tell Yuki about Haru's own scars. As the boy realized the words were on the tip of his tongue he got up to flee before he could say anything but Yuki grabbed his arm. Momiji yelped and his eyes began to water. Seeing this, Yuki let go quickly and before the rabbit could stop him had rolled up the boy's sleeves so the bright purple and blue bruises on his upper arm were clearly visible.
"Momiji," Yuki said quietly. "Did Haru do this to you because you found out what it is you won't tell me?" Momiji nodded and tears began to leak from his eyes.
"He-he told me he was in a fight. And I believed him but he lied! He must have because they looked like yours and the words... he couldn't have gotten those in a fight. Oh, Haru!" Momiji was crying freely now and his shoulders began trembling, he sank to the ground. Yuki immediately drew the boy into his arms and tried to calm him. He was trying desperately to figure out what it was Momiji was talking about. What of Haru's looked like mine? What words? What in the world has Haru gotten himself into that would make Momiji cry?
"What the hell is goin' on? Where'd Haru go?" Kyo had retrieved the shirt and was now standing next to Tohru looking at the crying Momiji in Yuki's arms.
"Yuki explained about his scars," Tohru waited for Kyo to say something about them. Kyo looked down at her impatiently and then realized she expected him to ask 'What scars?'.
"I already knew about Yuki's scars. I saw him transform after we had beaten each other senseless one too many times not to notice 'em. He had to tell me awhile back. So what happened to Haru?"
"Well, after Yuki had explained Haru was looking at him as if he had seen a ghost and then he ran off. Then Yuki asked Momiji if he knew what was wrong and now Momiji's crying and saying Haru lied to him." The rabbit was sniffling now and disentangled himself from Yuki.
"I-I think Haru's in trouble." After Yuki put on the shirt Kyo procured for him he looked into the rabbit's eyes.
"What kind of trouble Momiji?"
"He-he asked me not to tell. I said I wouldn't." Momiji's eyes were filling again. "He was so sad Yuki! I've never seen him like that, ever!" Yuki put a hand on Momiji's shoulder and rose.
"I'll go look for him. Don't worry; I'll make sure he's okay." Momiji nodded and allowed Kyo to put an arm around him.
"You're bein' brave kid. Don't worry. Yuki'll figure out what's wrong with Haru so ya' can stop your sniveling."
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Haru was sitting in a deserted class room fiddling with his razor. I can't believe it. Yuki, YUKI cut himself! I just can't get it. But he said he stopped. That means he only used to cut. I wonder how I never noticed. I guess the same way no one notices I do. Poor Yuki, to do that. He's stronger than I am, he stopped doing it. I wonder what got him to stop. Maybe it was Tohru; maybe he did it before she came but stopped when she started living with him and Shigure. The boy was so busy wondering about Yuki he didn't notice another presence in the room until a slender finger poked him in the shoulder. He stuffed his razor back up his sleeve quickly, not seeing how whoever it was could have missed it.
When he turned around to see who had poked him he was surprised to see Tohru's friend, he remembered her being called Hana, staring at him. He had no idea what he had done to the girl but she looked slightly annoyed.
"So it's you!" Haru looked at her stupidly. It seemed she hadn't seen his razor after all.
"Uh, me what?" The girl rolled her eyes.
"It's you making my head hurt! Honestly, you're projecting your emotions so heavily it's like someone's screaming in my ears."
"Er...sorry?"
"Never mind. Just stop it."
"But I don't even know how I'm doing it!"
"Well, what's wrong with you then?" Haru looked at her, surprised at the sudden change of topic,
"Wrong with me?"
"Yes, wrong with you. You're sending of waves of pain and sorrow as if someone you knew had just died."
"It's nothing. I'm sorry for making your head hurt." Haru rose as if to leave but Hana grabbed his arm, making him wince as her nails dug into one of his newer cuts.
"Well, if you're really sorry you'll tell me what's the matter so I can make you feel better and then my head won't hurt." Hana sat down on a desk, looking at him expectantly.
"I, well, I just have a lot of things going through my mind right now." The girl rolled her eyes again.
"Care to enlighten me?" Haru shook his head. "Oh, alright. I'll leave you alone. You best be getting back to Tohru now. I'm sure you've worried her sick." As they both rose Hana once again grabbed his arm.
"Oh, and Hatsuharu?"
"Yeah?"
"Don't believe anything he tells you. His forked tongue can only spout lies. He wants you to hurt. He wants to make you feel pain. He makes it so in the end you hate nothing more than yourself and that you worship him with every ounce of your being. You can't let him win. You have to remember there are people that care about you because they like you. They think you're worth something. They don't think you're a freak or a monster. You can't give in to him." While Haru was standing stock-still gaping at her Hana reached in his sleeve and waved his razor in front of him.
"I'll be taking this." Then the girl walked out leaving Haru staring after her. It almost sounded like she was talking about Akito. But she couldn't have been. There's no way she could know about him. I know Tohru didn't tell her, and even if she did there's no way that girl could know what Akito tells us. She couldn't possibly know Akito. Could she?
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When Yuki finally found Haru in deserted classroom the boy was staring at the door, unseeing. Yuki walked up to him and put a hand on his shoulder.
"Are you alright Haru?" The boy shook his head from side to side, as if clearing it.
"Uh, oh, Yuki. Yeah, I'm fine." Yuki looked at him disbelievingly.
"Really? Because when I left to find you Momiji was so worried he was crying. He was saying how you told him you got in a fight but you must have lied to him but he wouldn't say anything else except that he thinks you're in some kind of trouble. He didn't even seem to be angry that you had given him some bad bruises when he found out whatever it is you're hiding." Yuki looked so concerned that Haru wanted to tell him everything, to confide in the boy that had at some point shared in the same kind of darkness as Haru.
"He, he told you I hurt him?" Haru hung his head.
"I figured it out for myself and he couldn't deny it."
"Oh," the word came out as less than a whisper. Yuki knelt and looked up into Haru's downcast face.
"Haru, what is it? What's wrong with you? You've been so weird for a long time now. I guess I just figured it was because of Rin and your break up but that wouldn't have made Momiji so worried. I'm sorry. I should have asked you sooner." When Haru looked into Yuki's eyes he saw genuine sorrow. Yuki really was sorry he had assumed nothing was overly wrong.
"It isn't your fault."
"Maybe not, but I'm still sorry." After a few moments Haru realized his hands were shaking and it seemed Yuki did as well.
"Talk to me Haru. Tell me what's wrong." Haru shook his head.
"You'll hate me."
"I promise I won't hate you. I won't think any less of you. Please, I just want to help you." Again Haru shook his head.
"I can't tell you. I just can't." The cow's voice was so small even as close as he was Yuki had to strain to hear it.
"Alright, I understand. I'm here, when you're ready okay?"
"Thanks Yuki."
"I care about you, we all do. We just want you to be happy." His words were echoes of the ones Hana had spoken and Haru was again assailed with the urge to spill everything to Yuki. When Yuki rose he pulled Haru with him.
"Come on. Everyone's worried, we should go back. Besides lunch is almost over and we have to get to class." Haru nodded and followed Yuki back to the roof.
