AUTHOR'S NOTE BITCHES: Shiro: Hellz yes! Chapter two! okay. So, thank you to Fullmidget Alchemist for being our first awesome reviewer! Huzzah! And to Hopeless Alchemist for reviewing as well! love your reviews! And glad to know there are people reading this who have the same sick and twisted sense of humor that we do! XD
Amaya: Mind you, it is currently winter break for Shiro, and I start online college courses on the 7th. So we may not be able to crank these chapters out as fast as we do now. But that's not gonna stop us! We shall not rest until this epic tale of what the fuckery is over! We hope you enjoy Chapter 2, see you at the bottom of this page!
Both: Oh yeah, we don't own FMA. ….damnit.
~~~~~~~~~~Shiro and Amaya's POV~~~~~~~~~~
When the two fangirls finally arrived back at Amaya's house, Shiro began squealing happily as she squished the Edward plushie in her arms.
"Be careful, Shiro," Amaya said jokingly. "He can't breathe!"
They both shared a laugh.
"Aww, he's fine," replied Shiro. "He's an alchemist, he doesn't need to breathe!"
Again, the fangirls laughed.
As the day progressed, Amaya and Shiro grew bored.
Suddenly, Amaya shouted, "Shiro, catch!"
Shiro's head whipped in Amaya's direction to see a yellow and red projectile coming towards her. "AHHHWHATTHEFUCK!" In a sad attempt (a/n Amaya: More like pathetic. Shiro: Shut up .) to catch the Edward that soared through the air. Obviously, Edward hit the floor.
Amaya began to laugh manically at Shiro's frustration.
"Shut up!" Shiro shouted as her face grew red with embarrassment. In a fit of hilarious rage, Shiro hurled the plushie back in Amaya's face.
But Amaya caught it with a single hand and grinned widely. "Missed me!"
Shiro grew even more angry and annoyed.
"Try again!" Amaya exclaimed as she tossed the plushie back at Shiro.
Again, Shiro clawed at the air, but only managed to slap the Edward plushie face first into the ground.
For about another hour or so, Amaya would toss the plushie to Shiro, and unfortunately she dropped it almost every single time. (a/n Amaya: Apparently, Shiro has no fucking coordination whatsoever! Shiro: Don't tell them that! I've got great coordination... okay, I dropped him once or twice. Amaya: Try a hundred. Shiro: …shut up .)
~~~~~~~~~~In the FMA universe~~~~~~~~~~
Edward and Alphonse watched the scenery rush by from inside the train. Neither of them had spoke for the past half hour, but Al at last broke the silence.
"Um, brother? What happened back there in Colonel Mustang's office?" he asked.
Ed sighed, closed his eyes tiredly, and rubbed his neck at the memory of his strange episode. "I don't know Al, don't worry about it. It's not like it'll happen again." (a/n Shiro: Little did he know... Amaya: Haha, "little". Both: *laugh hysterically*)
The two brothers sat in silence for another few minutes.
And suddenly Edward felt a slight falling sensation. Then a sharp pain bloomed in his ass. (a/n Amaya: "Bloomed"? Seriously? Shiro: Yep, "bloomed".) Edward suddenly stood up and screamed in pain while grabbing his rump.
Every head on the train car turned in his direction to stare in confusion.
"What are you all looking at?!" Edward shouted angrily. His face turned red in both rage and embarrassment, and he sat down.
Alphonse tried to ask, "Brother, what's wr-"
"Shut up, Al!" Edward snapped as he felt the falling sensation again. His eyes widened as he thought, oh crap. All of a sudden, Edward face vaulted into the floor of the train car. Very irritated, he peeled his face off of the floor only to find that it was flattened. As he stood up to sit back down, a small rivulet of blood trickled from his flattened nose.
By now, Alphonse was torn between feeling concern for his brother, or laughing at him. He tried to contain his amusement as he attempted to ask the question, "Brother, are you-" but then he exploded into uncontrollable laughter.
Edward became very very aggravated. He sat down in a huff and glared out the window, determined not to make eye contact with anyone. Especially Alphonse. It was not long before he felt the sensation once more. His eye twitched maddeningly before his right arm gave protest and a small clank was heard. A bolt had rolled from his sleeve and clattered to the floor. The entire right side of his body now had a dull pain coursing through it.
Things such as this continued throughout the entire train ride.
By the time they at last arrived at their destination, Edward was fuming and bruised all over, with his automail in near shambles. He immediately decided to get a ticket back to his hometown, Risembool. It was time to visit Winry yet again.
A dreaded visit at that.
~~~~~~~~~~At the Rockbell Residence~~~~~~~~~~
The Elric brothers walked a little slower as Winry's house came into view. They had seen her angry before, but today was probably going to be a thousand times worse. After all, he only got his automail fixed four days ago.
"I think Winry will be a little angry with you, brother," Alphonse said nervously.
"Gee, Al. What makes you say that?" Edward replied sarcastically. Out of nowhere, a wrench came flying at Edward's face. "GAHHHHHHHHHHHH!" the tiny alchemist screamed in pain as the wrench smashed into his forehead. A small spurt of blood squirted out of the wound. "Damnit Winry, I already have enough bruises!"
"Why the hell are you back already?!" Winry shouted indignantly. "It hasn't even been a week! What other stupid thing have you done to wreck my precious automail?!"
There's no way I'm telling her the truth, Edward thought. She would never believe me anyway. Edward made his way inside the house, grumbling all the way, knowing the severe scolding he was about to receive.
"You didn't answer my question!" Winry snarled in annoyance. "What. Did. You. DO! Edward Elric?" (a/n Amaya: Oooh shit, he's in trouble now! Shiro: Heh, the last name has been used. You're in for it now, shorty!)
Edward leaned back on the couch to rest his aching body. "I don't wanna talk about it," he sighed tiredly. "You wouldn't believe me anyway."
"What do you mean you don't wanna talk about it?" Winry snapped. "I believed you when you told me about homonculi, what makes you think I won't believe you now?"
Edward sat there silently with an irritated pout on his face. (a/n Amaya: Just like Shiro after a game of catch. :D Shiro: Shut up! DX)
"Well, you see, Winry," Alphonse intervened before things got out of hand, "this kind of seems impossible. Even to us. But brother seems to be getting tossed around by things that... aren't there."
Edward humphed and crossed his arm. (a/n Amaya: Arm? Not arms? Shiro: Weeeeeell, the other one is kinda brokeded at the moment. And yes, I meant brokeded, haha!)
Winry's mouth opened and closed, but she could not find the words to say.
Edward averted his eyes from everyone. What the hell is happening to me?
~~~~~~~~~~Back with Amaya and Shiro~~~~~~~~~~
After a long night of watching anime, Shiro and Amaya finally decided it was time to get some rest. They had gotten so distracted that they were still wearing the same clothes they had on since that morning. (a/n Shiro: Is this an ADHD crack at me again? =_=)
Amaya set the Edward plushie on the bed, for it had been sitting in her lap the whole night. "Guess we should change into our pajamas," she said with a yawn.
"Yup," Shiro agreed sleepily.
"Do you wanna go in the other room for some privacy?" Amaya asked as she already began to undress.
"Nah, we're both straight girls so it's not like we're gonna stare at each other," Shiro said dismissively. "Besides, once you've seen one, you've seem 'em all."
"Haha, true," Amaya concurred.
"Maybe we should turn Edward around," Shiro added jokingly. "We don't need boys staring!"
They both shared a laugh, but despite the suggestion, neither of them bothered to turn the plushie around.
As the two girls continued to strip, the Edward plushie sat there and "watched" them.
~~~~~~~~~~Back at Winry's~~~~~~~~~~
"How is your automail this banged up?" Winry griped as she examined Edward's battered arm and leg. "What did those so called 'invisible forces' do to you, put you in a blender?! I bet you're just making that crap up to get out of trouble! I've told you a thousand times before that you need to be more careful! And another thing..."
Winry continued to berate him, as Edward sat there with his head laid back against the couch. Maybe I should find a new mechanic, he thought begrudgingly. Sometimes the lower price isn't worth all the grief.
Without warning, a very strange feeling overcame Edward's whole body. His face turned a shade of red that would put cherries to shame, and blood started to flow...
Edward crossed his legs and immediately averted his eyes away from Winry.
Winry suddenly looked skeptical. "Ed, what's wrong? Is it those "invisible forces" again?"
Edward refused to meet her eyes. "It's nothing!" He gritted his teeth. "Mind your own business!"
"You can't talk to me like that, Edward Elric!" Winry shrieked.
Edward froze. And the only thing that crossed his mind was: Oh. Shit.
"Look at me!" Winry demanded.
"I said mind your own business!" Edward squinted his eyes as he turned even redder.
"GET. UP!" Winry gripped his shoulders firmly and jerked him to his feet. She attempted to give his battered automail leg the once over, when she spied..."Oh." The young mechanic's eyes widened, and blood rushed to her face.
For the rest of the day, neither Edward nor Winry could look each other in the eye without their faces turning a glaring shade of red.
Granny watched the two youths with concern. I wonder what's gotten into them, she wondered. But then she merely shrugged and turned away.
~~~~~~~~~~Shiro and Amaya POV~~~~~~~~~~
Amaya and Shiro sat upon the bed, chatting excitedly with the Edward doll in Amaya's hands. "Can you imagine if the actual Edward had been watching us?" Amaya snickered suggestively.
Shiro snorted. "Yea, like that would ever happen!"
Little did they know... ;)
END AUTHOR'S NOTE: Shiro: AAAAHHHHHHHH! WHERE THE FUCK IS THE BOTTOM OF THIS STUPID ASS PAAAAAGGGEEEE!?
Amaya: Shiro! Shiro! We're here, calm down!
Shiro:AAAHHHHHH-oh. We are. O-O... oops. Hehe... hello my friends of internet land! So good to see you again since Tuesday! ^_^;
Amaya: We are aware that this chapter is a HELL of a lot longer than our last one, but we just had so many ideas that we just couldn't keep them contained within our fucking weird brains!
Shiro: I would have forgotten mine! I haz ADHD with no medication whatsoever! O-O Don't judge me!
Amaya: We congratulate you for actually reading this whole damn thing, and we hope to see you again in the next chapter. Until next time, my lovelies!
Shiro: Yeah! See ya next time my fellow weirdos! I'm gonna go haz some straight sugar now! =^w^=
Amaya: Shiro no! I don't want any property damage this time!
Shiro: I'm not that bad...=v.v= I only broke the front half of the house last time, so it's all good!
Amaya: *sigh* -_-
