Wow guys, don't review too quickly! I barely had time to go through that entire mess of reviews!1 However, I did manage to answer one. To EIMR:
Yes, I am going to update. Thanks for reviewing!
On to more serious (a.k.a. less sarcastic) matters: I don't know if you were expecting this chapter to be a continuation of the last because I was kind of doing mainly oneshots but if someone reviews and tells me they'd like to see another chapter or more of something, I'll gladly do it. Just say when and I'll post part two of Nico's horrendous hell known as karaoke night.
there are no raindrops on roses or girls in white dresses
Leo figured out pretty quickly that the kid who cracked jokes and laughed at the face of danger was also the kid who didn't get pummeled every night in his newest foster home. So his first night there, he singled out the biggest and the baddest (which isn't hard if you just follow the smell) and greeted them right before dinner. The way he saw it, as long as he didn't pose a threat to them, he'd be home-free to live as peacefully as an orphan delinquent could possibly live in foster homes. No ugly fights, no fires, and no running away.
So Leo introduced himself with some flair, tossed in a few 'yo-mama' jokes to break the ice and started laying out his master plan of them not beating him up in return for more killer jokes when the biggest of them all grabbed Leo by his inky black curls and snarled in his face, "Get the crap out of our way or you'll pay. Badly."
Leo, vaguely curious, politely asked them exactly what kind of currency they would accept on said payment and instead received a sucker punch that went straight for his mouth.
"I get it," he grinned as if his teeth didn't hurt. "It's a pun, on putting your money where your mouth is? That's genius."
As Leo looked up, he saw the rest of the foster kids surreptiously exiting the room and leaving Leo and his newfound friends alone.
Leo then was treated to a five star beating, courtesy of three kids about twice his age and four times his height and weight. Leo deployed his most useful trick- laughing as though each hit was the funniest thing he'd ever heard in his life. Crying was like fuel to bullies, so Leo did everything he could to provide the opposite.
Between kicks to his chest, Leo managed to say, "I guess since you guys don't care to miss dinner, the food must really suck. Or are you guys dieting? I mean, you all now a minute on the lips, a lifetime- Ow!"
Not one of his best comebacks, he admitted, but he wasn't exactly in the situation to produce his best work. He wasn't exactly in his comfort zone either.
And that's when Leo remembered watching some cheesy musical where all the kids got along so well and pranked their caretaker and wondered why in the world he ever thought living like an orphan would be exactly like that movie. Because no matter how hard he thought about his favorite things- his mom, the workshop, building little toys out of spare parts- it didn't make anything better. It didn't bring his mom back.
Leo ran away that night, and refused to believe in such hopeful lies again.
(God I suck at writing why did I even start this fanfiction thing in the first place)
