Sleep evaded Hawkeye the way peace avoided the war. It just wasn't going to happen any time soon. B.J. napped peacefully, and Charles was working post-op. Hawkeye had finished reading his dad's letters over an hour ago, and had been momentarily comforted by the words from home.

But the respite was all too brief.

The kid came to me for advice. All he wanted to know was how to land a girl for a night. And now he's lying in post-op. Tokyo, I told him, was where his problems would be solved. One weekend in Tokyo and he'd be good to go. All he wanted was the one thing I take for granted- a little luck with the ladies.

Radar was the polar opposite of Hawkeye in that department. Quiet and unsure of himself, he hadn't had a steady girlfriend since arriving in Korea. It wasn't unusual for him to turn to Hawkeye for advice with the ladies.

Why did he have to come to me yesterday? Why does he have to come to me at all? Who am I, really?

Who do I think I am?

He turned over in his bed yet again, quietly, as not to wake B.J. Part of him hoped he would wake, just to keep him from the overwhelming feelings of aloneness he was experiencing. But just having B.J. near was almost good enough for the time being. He watched B.J. as he wondered what he should do next.

Meanwhile Father Mulcahy was visiting with Radar.

"I don't understand, Father, what happened? I was just talking to him and then he yelled at me. He yelled at me! He had no right to. I was so mad at him I could have decked him if I felt any better."

"I understand your frustration, son. But anger is never the solution. I do hope you realize that."

"I know. Everyone keeps telling me not to be mad. But I can't help it. Hawkeye walked out on me in the middle of surgery. Something bad could have happened to me! He wouldn't have done that to any of his other patients. Why'd he have to go and pick me to do that to. Ouch." Radar rolled over to his other sighed as he winced in pain.

"Is there anything I can do for you? Do you need me to get a doctor?"

"Anyone but Hawkeye." Radar muttered.

"Now, don't you think you're being a little hard on him? After all, doctors are only human. There was only one human who was perfect, let's not forget. Hawkeye bleeds like the rest of us. He's bound to make mistakes now and then."

"It sounds like you're taking up for him! How would you feel if you were me?"

Father Mulcahy sighed. "I imagine I would forgive Hawkeye. The pressures he's under are unimaginable. He is a fine surgeon, as is the rest of the team. Charles also did a remarkable job assisting in your care. You have the best medical team at your disposal, a group of people who care about you. I would not be so quick to pass judgment on Hawkeye." He paused to gauge Radar's reaction.

"How are you feeling?" the priest asked.

"Not so good, to tell you the truth. I hurt all over. My chest hurts. It's kind of hard to breathe."

"Perhaps I had better find Charles." He said, referring to the on-call doctor. "Do you need anything else?"

"Do you think you could bring me my…."

"Yes?"

Radar wanted to ask for his teddy bear. But then he remembered Hawkeye telling him to grow up. Perhaps he was right. Maybe it was time to act like a man. Real men didn't need stuffed animals to help them in times of trouble. Or at any time, really. It was time to act like a real man.

"Never mind. Just tell him I think I need some pain medication."

"Of course. I'll be praying for you, son."

"Thanks, Father." Radar half- smiled as he turned over to his other side. He would worry about Hawkeye later. Right now the only thing he was worried about was finding relief from the pain in his chest. The pain was definitely getting worse.

"I hear some more morphine is in order." Charles walked in while studying Radar's chart.

"Yes, sir. Just a little. Not too much. I'm only feeling bad just a little."

"If I didn't know you I'd suspect you'd already been prescribed more than your fair share of morphine. The nurse will administer the drug. I'll monitor your progress. Is there anything I need to know?" Charles asked while checking the wound. "If you continue to have problems breathing we may have to operate again."

"But sir,I'm feeling great. "Ready to go back to work as a matter of fact."

"That, my vertically challenged friend, is not going to happen in the foreseeable future. I recommend you try to sleep. If you cannot do so on your own, the morphine will assist you. I will see you shortly. Nurse, I want his vitals in fifteen minutes." Charles ordered as he left the room.

The medicine kicked in quickly. He would heavy doses of morphine, IV fluids, and other drugs, as infection had set in. Overnight, Radar would take a turn for the worse.