Author's Note: I'm surprised so many people find this entertaining! Thanks for the reviews, I appreciate it! So here's the next 20 things that won't happen in Cryptic Cravings. Lots of love, Mrs. Alexander Sterling.

1. Alexander gets a dog and names it "Dog."

2. Raven bitch slaps Jagger with a raw steak.

3. Jameson has a stripper pole installed in the gazebo.

4. Jagger visit's the gynecologist.

5. Trevor finishes all sentences with "in accordance to prophecy."

6. Raven grows out her chin hairs.

7. Alexander wears a sparkly cape that says "The Magnificent One."

8. Matt shaves off his eye brows.

9. Alexander bites Raven and she turns into a kiwi.

10. Alexander sits on the kiwi everyday to keep it warm and ensure it hatches properly.

11. Alexander gets a Facebook.

12. Sebastian becomes a rapper.

13. Jameson pees in ice cube trays, then freezes them.

14. Alexander tattoos his dick to make it look like a paint brush.

15. Jagger joins a boy band…

16. Becky becomes a drug dealer.

17. Sebastian gets gummy bears stuck in his dreads.

18. Matt willingly picks them out with his teeth.

19. Alexander bathes in bacon bits and melted butter.

20. Alexander and matt give each other manis/pedis.

Review guys! I won't update unless you review! XD My bitch TwilightDisney556 is helping me write the next chapter, so I'll try and have it up as soon as I can. And be sure to check out her page if you're a fan of Twilight/Nightmare Before Christmas. She's a great writer. Thank you!