It's nice to know people enjoyed the first chapter, so here is the second chapter of this crazy parody. For those of you wondering, Kaido is a character who appeared in the prologue of the Utena manga.
Disclaimer: I don't own Utena or Ranma
Chapter 2: Trouble at School
Utena woke the next morning, in her female form, still clutching an ice pack to her groin. She sat up as she rubbed it. 'Well it's a bit better this morning, but it still stings. Man, that girl has a hard knee.' She thought as she turned to her dad who was still asleep as a panda. She got dressed and went downstairs for breakfast.
"Good morning, Utena-kun." Dios greeted her as she entered the living room. "How are you feeling this morning?"
"Other then the after pain due to a knee from a certain girl, fine." Utena replied as she started to eat. Anthy shot her a cold glare at that comment.
"Well it was your own fault, you pervert!" She shot back. Utena stuck her tongue out at her, but before they could start fighting, Mikage entered in his human form and tossed a school bag at Utena.
"As of today, you'll be attending school with Anthy and Akio." He told his daughter. Utena looked at the bag with distaste.
"I don't have time for school right now. I need to find a way to lift this curse before this girl here can do any permanent damage to me." She told her dad. Anthy shot her another glare, but before she could say anything, Akio walked by in his school uniform.
"Well I'm heading to school now." He turned to Anthy and Utena, "Anthy, you can take Utena to school today since she is your fiancé." With that he left. Anthy just sighed as she turned to Utena.
"Come on, we better get going before we're late." She stood up and dragged Utena out the door with her.
The two walked to school together. Anthy walked on the ground while Utena walked on top of a fence.
"I can't believe I have to walk a pervert like you to school." She said as she walked. Utena looked down at her.
"Pervert? Like I'd get aroused by you." She said as she looked away.
"Then what happened last night?" Anthy shot back. Utena just grinned.
"I was imagining what it would be like to walk in on a cute girl. Obviously that didn't happen." She did a back flip down to the sidewalk as Anthy kicked the fence down at that comment. "Like I'd let you knock me into the water bellow…" She started as a wave of cold water hit her from behind. Now male, she turned to see a random old lady slashing water on the sidewalk. She sighed as she started heading back in the other direction. "I need a bath now. I can't start school like this." Anthy grabbed her by the collar.
"I know a place you can get hot water from on the way." With that she dragged Utena in the direction of a doctor's clinic. Once there, Anthy told Utena to wait outside until she returned. Utena just stood against a post while she waited, not paying attention to anything around her. So she was quite startled when she felt a hand on her shoulder. Screaming she turned around to face a man with short dark hair and glasses.
"Utena, I got you some hot water." Anthy called as she rounded to corner and spotted Utena with the man. "Oh, good morning, Dr. Kaido." She bowed to the doctor.
"Good morning to you too, Anthy." Dr. Kaido replied. He bowed back and Utena glanced at both of them. 'Does Anthy love him?' She wondered. She took the hot water from Anthy and the two were on their way. By now they were running to be on time.
"So, do you love that guy?" Utena asked as they ran. Anthy blushed.
"Who?"
"That Dr. Kaido guy." Utena explained. "You seemed to have a thing for him."
"No I don't." Anthy said as she approached the school. A loud cry of male voice came from the entrance. "Because, I hate men!" With that a swam of young men surrounded her with swords of all kinds. Anthy seemed to pull a practice sword out of nowhere as she started to duel with them all.
"Go out with me, Anthy!" Many of them screamed as they attacked. Anthy took them all down quite easily. Utena watched all this in amazement as the last young man hit the ground, Anthy standing victorious. 'What was that all about?' Utena wondered.
"Every single morning." Anthy said from where she stood. She turned to face a young man with long red hair in a formal dueling vest, clutching a samurai sword in his right hand.
"Himemiya Anthy, today is the day I will beat you and take you as my bride." The young man said as he raised his sword and lunged. Utena was tired of watching so she leaped in-between the man and Anthy. The young man stopped in his tracks and asked, "And who are you?"
"Utena, what are you doing?" Anthy hissed. The young man looked up and continued to talk.
"But it is more customary to introduce one self first. I am the student council president at this Ohtori Academy and captain of the kendo club. My peers call me the red thunder of the Ohtori kendo club, but my name is, Kiryuu Touga!" Utena just blinked at him. By now, many students were watching from the school windows.
"Um, I'm Tenjou Utena and I'm staying at the Himemiya dojo." She told Touga. Touga gasped.
"What? With Anthy? I can not bear the thought of two gorgeous girls under one roof. For that I must punish you." With the he charged at Utena. Utena sighed as she picked a random sword off the ground.
"Can the sweet talk, Romeo!" She charged and leapt in the air ready to strike. As she did this, rain started to come down. Before anyone could notice Utena's transformation, Mikage as a panda rushed in and dragged her to a storage shed. Anthy just sighed as she followed.
Once safely in the storage shed, Mikage poured some hot water on Utena. Utena was steaming from her duel with Touga. "That bastard!" She cursed. "Next time I see him, he's dead!" She rang her hair out.
"You need to be more careful around him." Anthy told her. "Look at your neck." With that Utena noticed the bruise on the side of her neck. This just enraged her more. "Come on, we're late." With that they head up to class.
"Students, we have a new student joining us today. This is Tenjou Utena." The teacher told the class. "She just recently returned from a training trip in China. That being said, both she and Himemiya-san were late so they will both stand out in the hall holding buckets of water as punishment." Both Utena and Anthy sigh and they grab the buckets and head out into the hall.
"So what was that all about this morning?" Utena asked. "Why were all those boys attacking you?" Anthy sighed.
"It's Touga's fault. At the beginning of the year he held a student meeting and said 'All those wishing to become engaged to Himemiya Anthy must first beat her in a duel.'" She explained. "That jerk! Like I would just walk off and get engaged to someone who won a stupid duel." Utena laughed.
"I can so picture you doing that. You'd be wearing a red dress and a crown on top of your head." Anthy turned to her and raised her bucket offensively.
"What?" Utena just gulped.
"What?!?! Fiancé?!?!" Touga yelled in the middle of class. Akio just nodded.
"Her dad and my dad decided the two needed to be engaged." He explained. Touga just fumed.
"I will not allow it! Two pretty girls shall not become engaged to one another!" With that he grabbed his sword and ran to find Utena.
Utena and Anthy stood quietly in the hall now, that was until Touga came running down the hall.
"Tenjou Utena! I can not accept your engagement to Himemiya Anthy!" As soon as the words left his mouth, students flooded into the hall the meet the engaged couple. The couple just blushed and denied everything. Touga then lunged at Utena who barely dodged the strike and the water. She took off down the hall.
"Follow me!" She called out as Touga chased her down the hall. Once she reached the end, she leapt out the window. Touga foolishly followed her. The students gasped.
"Don't worry, the pool in bellow that window." With that a loud splash was heard.
Utena swam around the pool in a panic. 'I got to get out of here and find some hot water.' She thought. Touga's body floated above her. He then reached out and grabbed her, one arm around her chest, the other going for her crotch. Utena shot out of the water and slammed Touga against the pool deck as she ran off.
"Huh, was Tenjou-kun bigger just now?" A random student asked from the window. Anthy sighed as she grabbed some hot water and went to find Utena.
Utena sat in a tree with only a tank top on since she took her jacket off and she rang it and her hair out. 'Darn, now he knows about me.' She thought. She turned around and saw Anthy approaching with a kettle of hot water. She tossed it up as Touga appeared.
"Himemiya Anthy, have you seen Tenjou Utena anywhere. She seemed to have disappeared and left some substitute for her back at the pool." Anthy pulled out her practice sword.
"No, I haven't seen her." She told him as she raised her sword.
"Very well. Then I shall duel you for your hand in marriage!" Touga yelled as he charged.
"Like I'd ever get engaged to you!" The two crossed blades. With all her might, Anthy hurled Touga into the tree Utena was sitting in. He crashed into her hot water, which enraged her further.
"Hey, what's that big idea?" She asked him. Touga turned to face her.
"And just who are you, Pink-Haired Boy?" He asked her as he looked her up and down. "You wouldn't have happened to have seen Tenjou Utena around have you?" Utena just knocked him out of the tree. She pulled off a branch and hopped to the ground.
"Very well, then I shall duel you for Himemiya Anthy." Touga said as he faced her.
"Hey, I'm not some prize to be won!" Anthy screamed and the two duelists charged. With a swift motion, Utena landed several blows on Touga's body. With that the boy collapsed to the ground. Utena picked up her jacket and turned to Anthy.
"Let's just go home." With that she left with Anthy chasing after her.
"But school's not done yet!"
After school, Touga sat at a local café with Akio. The two were drink tea while talking over the days events.
"What just happened today? Who are Tenjou Utena and that mysterious Pink-Haired Boy?" Touga asked Akio. Akio smiled.
"Tenjou Utena is staying with us. In fact I already have several pictures of her." Akio laid out embarrassing pictures of Utena he had took the last day, all in her female form. Touga looked over the pictures.
"Wow, she's so pretty, yet masculine in a way." He commented as he looked at the pictures. "How much?"
"5000 yen." Touga handed Akio 5000 yen. "I also have several pictures of Anthy. They will be another 5000 yen." Touga handed more money over for the pictures.
"Say, why do you have pictures of your sister like this anyways?" Touga asked.
"I like to pleasure myself to them." Akio replied. Touga gasped in shock.
"But she's you sister! That'd be incest, man!" Akio just shrugged.
"I don't really care. I'd pleasure myself to anything anyways." Touga backed away slowly.
"Remind me to stay away from you." He then pulled a letter out of his pocket. "By the way, could you give this letter to Tenjou Utena?" Akio took the letter from him.
"Sure thing." He said with a wink.
"Please don't do that." With that Touga left.
Back at the dojo, Utena was busy exercising. 'That lousy jerk. He just had to go and ruin my first day at school, not that I really cared about school to begin with, but still.' She was doing a handstand when Akio entered the dojo and tossed her the letter.
"Touga-kun asked me to give you this." With that he exited the dojo and Utena picked up the letter. 'It must be a challenge.' She thought as she read 'Meet me at the park at 6. Kiryuu Touga' She grabbed a sword and made her way to the park.
It was 5:55 when she reached the park. 'He should be here soon.' She waited for ten minutes. Who was this guy to be late for his own challenge? He arrived five minutes later.
"Finally. Let's do this." Utena raised her sword. Touga then tossed something at Utena, which turned out to be roses.
"Tenjou Utena, I love you." He said. "I swear I will free you from you sinful engagement to Himemiya Anthy and whatever your relationship is to that Pink-Haired Boy." He turned to leave.
"Wait! I came here to duel, not listen to a love confession!" Utena yelled at him. Touga turned to face her as some random person passing by splashed Utena. He looked the Pink-Haired Boy up and down.
"Pink-Haired Boy, where have you hidden Tenjou Utena?" He asked with degust. Utena tossed the roses aside.
"You really are a stupid moron, aren't you?" She raised her sword. Touga pulled out his sword.
"I demand you show me Tenjou Utena this minute!" He charged at Utena. Utena leapt in the air and landed several powerful blows to Touga's vital points. The boy for the second time today, collapsed to the ground.
To Be Continued…
Well there's another chapter for you. I hope to have the next chapter soon.
