The Doctor shut the bedroom door behind him on the way out and Rose could hardly breathe through her laughing. Martha ripped open a bag of chips and said with her mouth open, "That was so mean to him, but he deserved it."

The other girls nodded in agreement and Amy smiled, "What was it he said? When I regenerated... Do you think it shrunk?"

At that Donna collapsed on the bed in a fit of laughter and nodded, "Downside to being a spaceman, I guess."

"Oh, god, I have to tell you guys about this one time..." Martha began, putting the bag down and smiling. "So I'm on the ship, right? After an adventure and everything, and it's like, maybe my first week on here. And well, my period comes, you know?"

The other girls nod understandingly and Martha continues in a quieter voice, "So I check my bathroom, there's no supplies in there! I didn't have anything! So, like a civil person, I go up to him and try and ask him about it, yeah?"

"Mhmm," Rose hummed.

"Instead of, oh I don't know, being helpful like I expected he just blushes really, really bright pink and tries to walk away. So after insisting for a little bit he finally points me to a supply closet. It took me ten minutes to get him to stop acting like a six year old boy!"

"That's the Doctor for you," Amy nodded with a sigh.


"Why did I ever think it would be a good idea to have more than one woman on this ship?" The Doctor mumbled, running a hand through his hair as he paced the console room. "Of course they'd end up teaming up against me, that's how women work!"

The lights in the console room flashed angrily and he groaned, "Yeah, yeah, I know they're all lovely women. And yes, I did mess up. But that doesn't mean they can sit in there and talk about..." The tips of his ears turned pink and the lights flashed again, "They can't talk about my... You know..."

If the TARDIS could, she would've sighed, and the Doctor was about to continue his loud complaining when a loud knock came from outside the police box doors.


"What do you say we make this night out a bit bigger?" Rose suggested while she sipped a soda.

Donna raised an eyebrow, "What do you mean?"

Rose whipped out her mobile and dialed a number, "Let's add to the party."

A few minutes later all the girls left the bedroom and walked to the console room, only to find that all the people they had invited had already arrived. The Doctor looked flabbergasted, gaze going from woman to woman. "Why are you all here?..." he said with arms folded across his chest.

"We were invited," River said simply with a smile.

There was another knock on the door and the Doctor answered it, shocked to see several more women standing outside the TARDIS. "Are you kidding me?!"

"Rude!" Reinette said with a mock gasp, "Lonely angel, learn to control your manners!"

Soon fourteen women piled into Rose's bedroom, and the group now consisted of Martha, Donna, Amy, Rose, River, Reinette, Lynda, Gwen, Tosh, Sally, Kathy, Sarah Jane, Clara, and Jenny. The Doctor burst into the room with the intent of telling them all to leave, only to be sprayed in the face with water. "Gotcha!" Clara said happily, running away before the Doctor could catch her.

Rose approached him and gave him a wide smile, "Sorry, Doctor, this is girls only. Bye bye!"

"Rose, why are there so many women on my ship? What is going on?!" He demanded, looking around the room at all the women who were now deep in conversations.

"Because we need a night away from you... So like I said, buh bye. We're just going to have some fun, maybe dance, eat some food, and talk a lot about you."

"But... But..." The Doctor stuck out his lower lip and begged, though Rose was having none of it and shooed him away with her hand. "If I hear my name, even one time!" He warned, about to continue when Rose slammed the door on his face. "Then I'll... Um... I don't know."

As soon as he was gone everyone turned to Rose expectantly, unsure of what to do now. Rose gave them a huge smile and walked to the side of her room, turning on a loud stereo and beginning to wave to the loud song, "Animal" by Neon Trees. Everyone started dancing and laughing and talking, and for a moment forgot about all the crap the Doctor had put them through. The best dancer by far was Sally Sparrow, and everyone gathered around her to watch her dance.


Clink... The Doctor hit his sonic against a wire and groaned when he heard the loud music playing in the distance. Clack... He hit it again and sighed in frustration when he heard a gleeful yell from Martha, something along the lines of "Woo!"

I want some more... What are you waiting for?...

He wasn't jealous. That was silly, of course he wasn't jealous. If he wanted to, which he didn't for obvious reasons, he could throw his own party and invite his own male friends and do... Male things and talk about females all he wanted. Honestly and truly, he didn't mind them having their little party, so long as the topic of himself was kept far away and locked in a nice, secure safe. People talking about him was never, ever a good thing. Especially human females. Especially human females like Rose Tyler who knew more about him and had seen more about him than he felt comfortable with other people knowing.

He could already picture her imitating him, "Quite right too." and the rest of the girls laughing their heads off at his lame response. And god, Martha and Donna would have some good stories too. Martha was definitely a wild card in a room full of those girls, what with her seeing him as a human and seeing him have to live in a flat while they waited for Sally Sparrow and Kathy Nightingale to fix everything that had happened back there with the Weeping Angels. Oh, god... What if Rose found out about him living in a flat for all that time? What if...

The Doctor couldn't take any more of this. He stood up and walked over to the phone attached the wall, quickly dialing a number he only used in the worst emergencies. Well, the girl emergencies anyways. Not that there was a lot of them. The phone only rang twice before a familiar voice picked up. "I'll be right there," the voice said without question.

Grinning and bouncing on the balls of his feet, the Doctor eagerly awaited the knock of the police box doors. It came sooner than he had expected and was greeted with the sight of Captain Jack Harkness, handsome and dashing as ever. Jack pulled the Doctor in for a hug which he returned, but when it lingered for a few seconds too long the Doctor was the one to let go and raise an eyebrow. "Jack! How have you been?"

"Great, now what's the problem? You wouldn't just call me for no reason, Doc," Jack sighed and sat on the jumpseat, propping his seat up on the console. Suddenly he frowned, turning his head towards the hallway. "Is that Usher playing down there?"

The Doctor nodded and sighed, sitting on a railing and swinging his legs. "I need your help... Rose, Martha, Donna, Amy, all the other women, they're all throwing a girls' night out party. And... They didn't invite me!" He sighed in exasperation and stared at Jack, expecting sympathy.

"Doc... That's why it's called a GNO. Kind of the point."

"Jack, if you call me Doc again I'll smack you. And I know it's the point! But Rose said they were going to... Talk about me..."

"Why don't you just listen in?" Jack suggested, raising an eyebrow when the Doctor blushed wildly. "You already did, didn't you?"

The Doctor nodded with fervor. "They were talking about... Dirty stuff! And it turns out they were faking because they knew I was listening, but still... They were talking about me! And... Me doing things! On the TARDIS!"

Jack stifled a laugh and sighed, "So what do you want me to do? Throw a boys' night out party?" Both men stared at each other for a moment until Jack spoke, "Oh, that's really what you want? Okay, then let's get started."

It took a lot of dialing and quite a bit of convincing, but eventually Jack had set everything up. The Doctor would groan every time the girls cheered or the music changed, and when the audible sound of a beer popping open nearby rang through the hallway in-between songs he nearly lost it. "Rassilon, they're driving me mad! What do you think they're talking about?"

"Probably your penis," Jack answered simply, sipping his own drink and spitting it out when he saw the Doctor's disgusted face.

"JACK!" The Doctor screeched, his voice too many octaves high to be healthy. "Don't say that word, it's filthy! Do you really think they're talking about that?" His hands covered his crotch defensively.

"Penis penis penis. Yep, I bet they are. Can't you just picture it? Rose saying, "Yeah, I've seen it before. It's huge... So magnificent and long and large!" And Martha and Donna agreeing? Maybe they're talking about how much you rock in bed?"

"Jack, just stop! God, I need to stop their party this second..." He began pacing again, burying his head in his hands.

"Relax, Doc, I was just kidding." Jack said, sighing when the Doctor glared at him. "Doctor," he corrected himself. "I'm kidding, they're probably just talking about how handsome I am." He saw his expression again and chuckled, "God you're gullible. I'm kidding!"

"It's not my fault you stupid humans have to use sarcasm in every sentence..." The Time Lord groaned in reply, scratching the back of his neck and resuming his walking.

A loud knock on the door interrupted their talk and the two men grinned from ear to ear, "Let boys' night out begin!"