I am sorry about all the spelling mistakes I'm not very good at spelling sorry anyway here we go.

I do not own anything but the plot everything belongs to the amazing writer Cassandra Clare.

Clary pov.

"Jace can I ask you something?"I ask.

"Clary you just did. But go ahead."Jace says.
"Why do you think Ash did all of that to me why do you think that my dad hurt me in ways no one should why did I have such a bad life even when I escaped one of the worst people in my life I got into another bad person's life? Why did it have to be me?" I ask with tears running down my face.

"The world only gives you what it knows you can take, but to be totally truthful Clary I don't know why people are so sick and cruel." Jace says.

"I'm sorry I shouldn't put my problems onto you that's not right for me to do."I say as I wipe away my tears.

"Clary there is nothing to apologize for, you mean the world to me and to see you like this breaks my heart you should never have ever gone through that." Jace says to me. I shake my head no and he grabs me by my shoulders and pulls me into his chest and hugs me.

"Tell me what your feeling Clary please I feel so helpless right now and I want to help you as much as I can but I can't do anything right know and I'm scared for you." Jace says to me and I feel his tears go into my hair and he starts shaking.

"I don't know Jace I'm so mad and angry and upset and everything I do just comes right back at me and The only people I wanted were you Simon and my brother but Simon won't talk to me and my brother won't ever be there again and now I'm so angry and I don't want to live anymore and I just want to stop all of the feelings from inside me and it's not working I still feel all the pain I still see the hatred in there eyes I still see them all in my dreams and I hate it so much and no one has been there for me in awhile and no one cares enough to help me and I'm truthfully scared for my own life right know I'm scared for everything that has ever happened and I don't know what I'm supposed to feel right know but i feel pure anger and sadness and I don't want that feeling I wan to get on with life not sit here and cry and live in the past because the longer I do that the longer it will take to get out of it but it seems so much easier if i just give up because then I won't have to worry about anyone or anything anymore." I yell and I start hitting Jace with everything that I have in me with tears running down my face and I just keep hitting him and crying and he lets me. Then I lean into him and break down into uncontrollable tears of fear and anger and every emotion that I feel that was bottled up for so long and he just holds me knowing this is what I need but he cries with me. Thats what I don't understand, I end up falling asleep in Jace's arms.

5 hours later Jace pov.

I let Clary sleep in my room and I went out to the couch.

I wake up to Clary screaming, I get up and walk into my room to see her thrashing around on the bed from a nightmare and she's crying in her sleep. I nudge her shoulder and she jolts up and continues to scream for a moment until she realizes where she is and she breaks into tears.

"Shh your okay your right here safe and sound I won't let anything happen to you don't worry your fine."I say as i rub he back and her hair.
"Jace can you sleep in here with me I don't want to be alone please?"

"Of course Clary if thats what you want."I say and she nods her head yes so I lay down next to her and pull the blankets over us. I put my arm around her and her face is facing my chest I can feel her tears soaking my shirt but I can't bring myself to care about the shirt I care more about the red head thats laying next to me who has been hurt so many times.

"Jace what if Jordon doesn't find him?"She asks me in a whisper.

"Nothing because we will find him."I say and kiss the top of her head and she snuggles closer to me holding onto me like I'm her lifeline.