Emma hummed quietly to herself in the shower as she washed away the smokey smell of the casino she and Killian had visited while stopped in Winnemucca, Nevada. The train had been slightly delayed due to a sand storm that was brewing over the northeastern region of Nevada.

They'd thought about just staying in their room during the 8 PM stop, but when the delay had been announced, Killian had suggested an outing. As such she and her travel companion had decided to hit the town since they now had almost six hours instead of just under two before they departed. Dressing for the evening, they'd headed out to see what the tiny town of Winnemucca had to offer. It turned out there wasn't much, so they'd decided on a casino where they could eat, drink, and play games.

Emma had never been a winner before, but it seemed no matter where she put her money down, she'd been a winner tonight. She'd won at blackjack, roulette, and hit a mini jackpot.

"I must be your lucky charm," he'd purred into her ear when she hit a $775 dollar jackpot on the Dangerous Beauty slot machine he'd suggested was named after her.

"Oh, you'll definitely be lucky tonight." Emma had turned in his arms as the siren atop the machine blared loudly. Wrapping her arms around his neck and carding her fingers through his hair she'd latched onto his lips and rubbed her body against his.

"Does winning turn you on?"

"You turn me on, let's go back to the train."

"Soon, lass. Let's eat, maybe you'll make those divine noises for me again."

"Fine," Emma conceded as her stomach growled at the mention of food.

Killian had led her through the casino with a hand on the small of her back while they'd looked for a place to eat that was open in the middle of the night. They'd found a small diner and the hostess led them to a booth where Emma scooted into the first bench seat. Instead of sitting across from her, Killian scooted in next to her.

"Oh, how sweet. Are y'all newly weds?"

They'd both shaken their heads emphatically while answering in the negative.

"Celebratin' an anniversary?"

"No, again," Emma smiled fakely, growing more uncomfortable by the moment.

"Well you certainly do make a cute couple, whatever y'all got going on."

"Thanks, lass, do you mind if we look over the menus before we order?" Killian asked, attempting to get rid of the overfriendly wait staff. He'd sensed Emma's discomfort even as the woman left their table side, and in order to distract her, he'd leaned over and planted wet, hot kisses to her neck and ear. "Here to Chicago," Killian whispered before biting down on her ear lobe. He chuckled darkly at the shiver that seized Emma's whole body.

She'd turned and met his lips, immediately plundering his mouth to show him just what she had on her mind. "I want you, Killian."

"And I you, Emma." His hand slid between her thighs and massaged gently as he'd worked his way further to her center.

She was hungry for Killian again as her hands slipped over her body while she washed. Her mind wandered back to this morning and what she now referred to as sucking cock outside of Sacramento. Emma decidedly loved sucking Killian Jones off; he had a perfect cock, a long, thick, firm shaft and a velvety tip with a slit that had shot hard down her throat. She shivered despite the scalding water cascading down her heaving chest.

Finishing her shower as quickly as she could, Emma hopped out of the tiny stall, dried off, threw on her clothes and practically ran back to their room. She breathlessly opened the door and slammed it closed.

"Someone chasing you, love?" Killian questioned as he looked up over the papers he was pouring over.

Emma couldn't remember when she'd stopped minding that he called her love; the endearment had kind of grown on her. She smiled lasciviously when he looked over the frames that rested low on the bridge of his nose to peer at her hungrily. He looked amazing sitting in the corner reclining chair wearing nothing but a pair of unbuttoned, well worn jeans, no shirt, and wet hair.

"So you have glasses too?"

"Aye, mostly for reading the fine print in these blasted contracts." He tossed them to the side where they landed on top of his briefcase. Killian licked his lips as he looked Emma up and down. She had on a skin tight tank top and her hardened nipples poked at the fabric that was wet from her tousled hair, her shorts were just the right side of inappropriate putting her lean thighs on display. His cock twitched as he imagined just how those thighs would feel wrapped around his head.

"Why are you reading contracts in the middle of the night when there are much more enjoyable activities to be had?"

Standing from the lounge chair in the corner he took several paces toward her and pulled her into his arms. "I've been waiting, you were in the shower for a long time. Were you being naughty?"

"Mmmm, I wanted to be," she admitted, "but then I decided I'd rather have the real thing." She palmed his erection through the soft denim, then started to unzip him.

Killian's hand was quick to cease her movement. "Not a chance," he growled. "You will be first tonight, Swan." He pushed her toward the bed while staring into her eyes like a hungry wolf about to devour its prey.

Emma's whole body prickled with anticipation as she looked back at him, refusing to blink or break first. His next question shocked her a bit though, and she faltered, blinking her eyes and frowning.

"Top or bottom?"

"What, no foreplay tonight?"

Killian laughed a deep mirthful thing. "Top or bottom bunk, you concupiscent little minx."

Emma joined him in laughter, partly at herself, and partly at his choice of words. "Who the fuck says concupiscent?"

"Those of us who don't like the word horny use the word concupiscent." He purposefully popped the t and rolled his hips into hers. "Now, top? Or bottom?"

"We already christened the bottom, I guess we could try and fuck on every surface we've been provided."

"Stellar plan, Swan, now get these sweet cheeks up there." Killian brought both his hands down firmly on her behind then squeezed.

She obeyed immediately, climbing the small ladderwell to the top bunk. She paused when she heard him growl.

Killian watched as she climbed, her arse looked positively edible. He palmed himself as he watched her go, grunting at the contact. She had him more worked up than he could ever remember being over any woman. When she stopped to look down at him, he couldn't resist. He stepped up to the first rung and slipped a hand into the leg of her shorts. Sliding them up over her cheek, he bit down on her pert flesh. His cocked jumped at her moans as he soothed the bite with his tongue and lips. "Gods, you have a delectable arse."

Emma giggled at the way his accent got super heavy when he talked dirty. It was so hot, she couldn't remember ever being this turned on and looked after by any man before Killian. Climbing into the bunk on her hands and knees she made sure to shake her ass in his face.

"Such a tease."

"It's not a tease if I let you have it."

Killian inhaled so hard at the thought of her tight ass around his cock, that he choked.

"You okay there," Emma laughed. She watched as he descended the ladder and reached for a bottle of water. She took that moment to get ready, maybe steal his breath away again.

"You'll be the death of me," he muttered as he caught his breath. He took a few more swigs of water before stripping off his jeans, and climbing back up to join her. The sight that greeted him was stunning. She was stripped bare, legs bent at the knee, feet spread wide and planted firmly against the mattress. One hand kneaded a breast and the other played languidly at her folds.

"It's like you're trying to kill me!" he gasped as he caught sight of her. Spread for him, her hand playing, first and third fingers spreading her folds while her middle finger stroked her clit. He wasn't sure how he was going to manage this, the bed wasn't long enough for them both to lay out, but he needed to taste her. "Scoot down, love." Once she was close enough, he grabbed her wrist and brought her fingers to his mouth. He sucked each finger clean, then wrapped his arms under her thighs and pulled her glistening folds to his waiting mouth.

Emma's hips bucked wildly as his tongue flicked feather light touches against her clit. It wasn't enough and she struggled against the strong grasp he had around her thighs as he held her down to tease her. She whined needily as he continued to barely ghost his tongue over her most sensitive spot. "Killian, please."

"You started without me, love. Very naughty." He spread her thighs wider when he felt her try to squeeze them for some semblance of pleasure.

Emma carded a hand into his hair then yanked his head up so she could look into his eyes. "I am going to finish without you too if you don't fu-"

Her words were replaced with a moan as he gave her the full pleasure of his tongue. He licked long flat strokes through her folds, tasting every drop that trickled down her drenched core. "I love the way you taste, Emma," he murmured into her clit before sucking it into his mouth.

Emma's grip in his hair tightened mercilessly as he held the perfect amount of suction over her clit so he could stroke it with his tongue at the same time. "So... good… oh…" She couldn't formulate complete sentences as she watched him eat her out. Killian was watching her intently through darkened eyes, and it revved her up as they maintained eye contact through one of the most intimate experiences of her life.

"Touch your breasts, love." Killian grinned against her folds when she mercifully released his hair to comply immediately. He stood on the stairs to the bunk, cock in agony as he couldn't even seek friction against the bed, legs shaking as he worked to set Emma ablaze. He released one of her thighs so he could finger her pussy. Keeping his mouth focused on her clit, Killian plunged two fingers into her wetness, groaning as he anticipated shoving his cock in her.

Emma kneaded her breasts, pinching her nipples as he'd bid her to do. The second he released her thigh it wrenched closed, rubbing against the side of his head before extending fully over his shoulder and flexing down to her toes as she bordered the edge of bliss. When his fingers entered her suddenly, her breath caught, and her fingers clamped down around her breasts, grasping tightly as she crumbled under his exertions.

"Delicious," he praised as he licked away every trace of her orgasm. Climbing the rest of the way into the bed he squeezed between Emma and the wall. One arm behind his head, and one thrown over his face, he was the picture of comfort.

"I don't want the outside," she complained. "It's cold."

"You'll want to be exactly where you are for the way I'm going to fuck you."

Emma arched an eyebrow and propped herself up on her elbow to face him. She traced a nail down the center of his chest, following the natural contours of his hair all the way down to where it gathered into a singular path toward his glorious cock. "And just how are you going to fuck me?"

"Give me a minute, love, I've lost a bit of feeling in me legs and toes from standing on that damned ladder." He peeked out from under his arm and offered her a glistening smile, "Worth it."

Emma glowed under the compliment and leaned down to kiss him. His beard was still a bit damp from her arousal, but she didn't care, it was kinda hot tasting herself on him, she'd never done that before. Licking along his lips and into his mouth she was rewarded with a growl from Killian as he rolled to face her and pinned her to the mattress kissing her roughly.

They made out, kissing and caressing, alternating between moments of rough and feral need and tenderness. Killian's hands were all over, he traced patterns along her sides, fondled her breasts, massaged the muscles of her back, and squeezed her perfect ass. Emma was more singularly focused, she jerked him off with one hand while her other hand cupped a muscular buttcheek. She delighted in the way the muscles of his ass and hip slid under her palm as he shallowly thrust into her warm hand. The pace they set was enough to drive him mad with want, but not over the edge.

"Turn over," he grunted.

"You want me on my hands and knees?" she purred.

"Eventually yes, but we don't have enough room up here for that." He reached his hand straight up, touching the ceiling, and it was true, he'd never be able to fuck her doggy-style up here unless he wanted to be bent at the knee and at the torso.

"Turn over so you're facing away from me." Once she'd turned over he told her to put one arm under the pillow they were going to share, and lay her head down. "Reach under the mattress with your other hand."

As she felt around Emma was surprised to find a foil package. "Well, you're just a regular boy scout, prepared for every eventuality." She handed the condom to him over her shoulder, where he was propped up on his elbow. He was silent for a moment as he ripped the package open with his teeth and then rolled the rubber sheath over his length.

"I think you'll find there is nothing boyish about me." Killian sealed his lips to her neck, sucking hard, then thrust his hips upward, sinking into her slippery depths.

A high pitched exhale left Emma's mouth when he thrust into her suddenly. "Oh, you feel so good like this."

"Just good?" Killian grabbed her thigh and put it up over his so she was spread a little more. Placing his free hand over her stomach he held her close, almost possessively, as he slid in and out of her at a lazy pace.

"You do not need your ego stroked."

"It's not my ego being stroked right now," he rasped into her ear. "You feel like heaven wrapped around me. Your cunt is so warm, so wet, and swollen perfectly to take all of me, Swan."

Emma whimpered as he muttered his filth in her ear. His hand tightened around her as he picked up his pace. She reached her arm around his back to hold onto something as he pistoned into her. There was the flex of his hips again, and it made her hotter feeling his body working to bring her pleasure. She understood now why he'd put her on the outside, he'd be fucking her into the wall right now if they were reversed.

Killian was getting close, the way she writhed and arched her back in his hold meant she was getting close too. He felt her hand cover his and slide it down her belly, and he knew what she wanted. He placed his palm against her mound and rubbed circles to her clit with his thick fingers. He pounded into her harder, "I'm so close, Emma. Come with me?"

When he wasn't talking, his mouth was pressing kisses and bites along her neck and ear.

Emma couldn't find her words and instead nodded her head vigorously. She needed to come again, the pressure was building and she felt as if she might burst.

"Now, love. Come all over my cock," he commanded and then bit down on her ear.

A shiver broke across her skin when he bit and suckled her ear, but the final piece had been when he demanded that she come all over his cock. "Killian," she moaned as he slammed home a final time.

Killian stilled his hips as he came at his deepest point inside her, letting her spasming walls choke and caress his cock through his orgasm. He leaned his head into her neck, panting for air. He wasn't out of shape by any means, but she brought out an animalistic need in him that had him pushing the envelope of rigor. "You are fucking brilliant, lass."

How did he do that, she wondered. From filth to praise in the blink of an eye. "You're not too bad yourself."

"I think you can do better than that," he prodded, tickling her side.

"Hey," she yelped. "No tickling!"

"Says who?" Killian squeezed her side again, eliciting the most captivating giggles he'd ever heard.

"Okay, okay! You were exemplary, fucking amazeballs, you have a distinguished supercock amongst mere mortals."

It was Killian's turn to laugh, and it was a deep, belly laugh. "Amazeballs? I don't think I've ever been called that before."

"Oh, and you have been told that you have a supercock amongst mere mortals," she deadpanned.

"At least twice," he bantered back without missing a beat. "Let me get cleaned up before we have a mess to deal with."

Emma moved a bit, letting him slip from her and then sat up. She climbed down the ladder first, and Killian followed behind. "Hold on, I brought something for you." Emma dug in the pile of things she'd dropped after her shower. She found a washcloth she'd gotten wet and brought back for exactly this reason and handed it over to Killian. "It's a little cold now, but it's better than tissues that will make your cock look like it was tarred and feathered."

"Well, now who's the prepared boy scout?"

"Oh, I know there is nothing boyish about any of this." Emma gestured to her whole body cockily before grabbing the second washcloth to clean herself.

It was almost four in the morning when they finally climbed into the lower bunk, both exhausted by the long day and night, it was nearing dawn and all either wanted to do was get some sleep.

"Good night, love." Killian placed a kiss to her temple, wrapping her up in his arms.

"Night," she murmured after pecking his lips. Good night kisses and snuggles? She didn't even recognize this Emma Swan. She was too tired to freak out over the domesticity that was going on right now, and more than that, she kind of like it.

Despite waking up several times, Emma had never slept so soundly as she did over the next eight hours. Each time she woke she was still securely snuggled in the arms that held more comfort and joy than she'd ever known. And each time that thought crossed her sleepy mind, she pushed it away in favor of just being. Everything about this experience was new to her, and she found that she wanted to enjoy every moment. The steady rhythm of the train and the happiness in her heart lulled her back to sleep each time.

Killian could have woken much sooner, but each time he realized that this enigmatic woman was still comfortably wrapped up in his embrace he decided to stay put. Emma had sailed unexpectedly into his life, and he could not be more enthralled by her than he currently felt. He wanted to know more, he wanted to know everything about her.

The moment they realized the other was awake, they were back on each other, their need to take, and be taken, insatiable. It started off slow and sweet, as they kissed and touched their way back into full wakefulness.

Emma stretched her body, enjoying the sated feeling that inundated her entire being. Looking at her phone, she realized why she was so hungry. They'd slept away half the day and had now spent the remainder partaking in some rather rigorous activities. Emma had even let him have that which she'd promised, she was no tease, though she was more than a little sore.

A smile commanded her face as she pulled on her panties and bra. She chuckled under her breath remembering the way he'd choked last night when she'd suggested it. Then there was the gobsmacked expression on his face when she'd actually offered her ass to him this afternoon as she looked over her shoulder, telling him, all aboard.

Killian watched her from the comfort of their still warm bed. A beatific smile encompassed her face and she was glowing. He hoped he was the cause of this change.

"Get dressed, I'll take you to dinner. My treat since I won big last night."

"Wherever shall we go?"

"Hmmmm." Emma tapped her chin as though she were deep in thought. "I know! Let's go to the dining cart."

They both chuckled at their own silliness while getting dressed.

"After you, darling," Killian said as he held the door to the hall open.

"You just want to look at my ass while we walk."

"Aye, so?"

"What if I wanted to look at your ass?"

"Well then," Killian said as he took her hand in his and pulled her behind him to walk to dinner, "look your fill, Swan."

Emma chuckled at the way he sashayed his hips, even going so far as to put a hand on his hip and throw her a coy smile over his shoulders.

They sat down at a small two top in the dining cart and perused the menu quietly. Each had a little more on their mind than just the food choices, but neither knew how to break the ice. Killian wanted to know more about this enigmatic woman. Where was she going, why was she running, did she feel any of the connection he felt to her, outside of the obvious sexual chemistry? Would they really never see each other again after Chicago?

Emma found herself enjoying Killian's company more by the minute. She'd never met another soul who she'd hit it off with quite like this, and she didn't just mean sexually. Of course she would chalk up their quick rapport to the fact that there was no end game to worry about, just a final destination where they'd go their separate ways.

"Let's play a game," Killian suggested once they'd made their orders.

Emma saw the spark in Killian's eyes as he asked the question, like he knew he was on thin ice, but he was going to walk that line anyway. "What kind of game?"

"Just a simple game of Q & A."

Emma felt her shoulders tense up as she looked into his engaging expression. His eyebrow cocked, he was all cheshire grin and roguish charm, as if she shouldn't have a care in the world about his obvious challenge. "I don't know…"

"There's a catch, to keep it from getting too out of hand. You can only ask a question that you will answer first." Killian noticed the moment Emma relented, her shoulders visibly loosening up, and a small smile catching her lips. "C'mon, I'll start, how old are you Emma Swan? I am thirty."

"I'm twenty-eight, old man."

"As you can see, I've maintained my youthful glow. Your turn."

Emma sat silently thinking about another question she could ask that she also wouldn't mind answering. "What do you do for a living? I'm a cop." She knew that technically she had just quit her job, but she planned to go into the same line of work once she arrived back home.

"I own a shipping business with my brother, Liam. We are based out of England, I run that side. When we expanded to the eastern seaboard of United States six years ago, my brother and his wife were the ones to come out here to set up shop, and now they are ready to go home. Since I've no attachments left in England, the logical play is for me to come here and take his place, so he and Elsa can go home."

Emma didn't fail to see the bitterness that colored his tone when he spoke of being unattached. She also noticed just how much he'd expounded on his answer; she only hoped he didn't expect the same.

"So, since I just answered this anyway, what takes you toward the east coast?"

"That's cheating!"

Killian grasped at his chest, "You wound me, Swan. I was merely killing two birds with one stone!"

Emma huffed with displeasure as she signaled the server to order another drink. "Well, if you must know, I too have a brother and am headed home for a visit."

"So you are headed to the east coast!" Killian was practically glowing, his smile was so wide.

"What? Oh! You cheater, your shipping business is probably run by pirates." Emma clenched her fists on top of the table. She hated being bested! Killian had only known she was headed to Chicago in the midwest, yet he'd outsmarted her with the assumptive question.

Killian just sat preening under his victory and let Emma huff and puff. With any luck her frustration would make it easier to learn more about her.

The waiter came back with their drinks, and Emma immediately ordered two more. "Alright, pirate," she muttered before tossing back her double, "you're on."

They played through dinner, eating, drinking, and laughing. Emma learned that Killian and his brother bicker a lot, but they love each other deeply, his favorite sport is football, surprise, surprise - the American kind. He wanted to be in a boy band as a child, he plays the piano and guitar, and sings, his favorite cuisine is Italian, and he is not a butt or breast man because he is a fan of every part of her… Good one, Jones, she'd told him.

Killian learned that Emma and her brother get along great and like himself, she gets along famously with her sister-in-law, her favorite sport is also American football, and she had always wanted to go into law enforcement so she could catch all the bad guys. She loved to sing in the shower, did not play any instruments, her favorite food is grilled cheese and onion rings, and she does not have a preferred feature on a man, but does prefer dark hair and scruff. He'd lit up like a firework at that answer.

Emma was a little more loose lipped as they finished their third drink and started in on a triple layer chocolate cake with raspberry drizzle. "Why are you unattached?" she asked around a mouthful of the chocolate confection.

"You have to answer first, love, and if you do, so too shall I."

Emma rolled her eyes at his flowery phrasing. "I'm unattached because men are assholes."

"I'm afraid that's a bit too vague, unless you'd like me to be just as obscure?"

"Ugh, fine." She thought on how in depth to go and decided to go for broke. Nothing like a little honesty to see if her track record would remain the same. "I'm unattached because my most recent ex slept with our former boss so he could get a promotion we were both eligible for. The ex before that left me during a pregnancy scare, and prior to that, at the start of my bad decisions in a long line of bad decisions was ten years ago when I ran away from the only home and family I had ever known to follow a boy. He left me for someone else after two years, he'd been seeing her behind my back for almost the whole time. Guess I was too caught up in work to notice."

"Don't do that, love. Don't accept someone else's mistakes as your own. He fucked up, not you, and he's a bloody idiot for letting someone like you go. They all were."

Emma could feel the blush along her cheeks, she didn't exactly know what 'someone like you' meant, but she knew he meant it as a compliment. And even though she knew Killian was right about where to lay blame, it was an old habit of a foster kid who couldn't figure out who else could be to blame but herself, each time things didn't work out with a family.

"Where did you go, Swan?"

At some point during her reverie Killian had reached across the table top to hold her hand. She shook her head to clear the old hurt. "Just thinking about why I do that… you know, blame myself."

"And?"

"Well that is another question, and I believe it is your turn to answer."

"Ah, right you are. I am unattached because from the time I started working, I buried myself in the business. I was a bitter young man, angry at my father for his treatment of my mother and subsequent abandonment of our family, and disheartened that my mother died too young. I had no desire to partake in true love. Sure I scratched the occasional itch, but I was never serious about relationships. I met a woman several years ago who made me see more of what life had to offer. We fell in love, or I at least I did. Turns out she was married to a man several years older than herself and she'd become a bored wife. She was slightly older than me, and I became her boy toy. She told me for a long time that she would leave him, and I let her string me along. The catalyst for our separation was finding out that she had a child. I couldn't knowingly stay in the picture when there was a child who had a mother and father and the only thing standing in the way of his world remaining intact was me. I couldn't destroy a family as my father had, so I broke it off. I am better off for knowing her, she opened my eyes to the world around me, and after the initial hurt wore off I feel like I have come out a better man."

Emma squeezed his hand, but instead of apologizing for his bad experience, she softly said, "We know how to pick 'em."

"You say that sarcastically, lass, but we are sitting here together. That's got to count for something."

"Your turn," she said, trying not to smile too big, because it did feel like it counted for something.

"You know what I'm going to ask. You set yourself up for it."

Emma feigned ignorance, shaking her head and quirking her eyebrow. If he wanted to know, the rules were going to change a little bit.

"All right, your stubbornness, why do you blame yourself for other people's mistakes?"

Killian knew he'd made a mistake when Emma grinned like a murderer who'd just been acquitted and could never be tried again. Somehow he had stepped into a trap. He waited anxiously for the punchline.

"Well, since you can't answer that particular question, I will answer, if and only if I get to ask you any question I want at a time of my choosing, without having to answer it myself," Emma said.

Killian narrowed his eyes at her. It would seem she had bested him. But what else could she ask that he wasn't willing to tell her? They'd talked about Liam, Father, his ex; there wasn't much else to tell.

"Do we have an accord?" she asked.

"Aye, love, we have an accord."

"Let's go back to the room for this one. I don't tell this story often, when I do I don't like to tell it in front of a room full of strangers." Emma stood up, and since they were still holding hands she pulled him up with her. "You can look at my ass this time."

Emma had put off her answer for as long as she could. She'd wondered just how in depth she'd go when telling Killian about her past, as she changed into one of his t-shirts and pulled her hair back into a low ponytail. Now sitting perched in his lap as they sat together in the recliner, unless she used her powers of persuasion for sex, she'd need to answer. She felt rather protected wrapped in his arms, curled in on herself, like she could get through this story without breaking apart.

"You don't have to tell me, you know," he whispered.

"I know." Emma wrapped his arm around her middle a little tighter and laced their fingers together, snuggling into his hold. "I am choosing to give you the real answer on why I blame myself for how others see and treat me. I haven't told this story to many and I only ask one thing… no pity."

Killian brought their joined hands over his heart, "I promise."

"I was abandoned at birth, found on the side of a road." Emma stopped to clear her throat, her voice a little hoarse around the bubble that always formed in her throat when she talked about childhood. It wasn't that she still felt bad for herself, she just hated the way the system had failed in her case. It broke her heart that it was still happening to orphans across the country.

"I was an orphan most of my childhood. I don't know everything about the beginning, but I know the parts my adoptive mother told me. When I was found on the side of the road, I was brought to the local hospital. There was a nurse who cared for me and petitioned to adopt me before I went into the system. Her name was Ruth Nolan, and her petition was denied because she was a single mother with a child of her own, and only had a single income. I went into the foster system, and for the next year and a half I lived with a foster family. At almost two I was approved to be adopted by the Swan family, and they named me Emma Swan. Other than being told that tidbit of information, I don't have any memories of them. On our way home from the final adoption hearing, which had come after a six month adoption process, they were killed in a car crash. My car seat was thrown from the car and I didn't suffer a single injury.

"I was brought into the same hospital to be checked out, and Ruth Nolan again petitioned for adoption and was denied for the same reasons. The next two years were a mix of different foster homes. When I was four, I was adopted by another family, I remember them well, I lived with them for a little over three horrible years. During that time we moved to Phoenix, Arizona where my adoptive father had invested everything into a business that never took off, it took a toll on him and he started drinking. He'd always been verbally abusive, but he became physically abusive with the drink in hand, and after beating the shit out of my adoptive mother one too many times, he was finally arrested and put behind bars. She tried to take care of me for a time, but she had started drinking heavily too, and by the time I was eight I had missed more than half the third grade and we were living in her car. Social services got involved and I was taken away. They'd given me the choice to stay in Phoenix or go back to my place of birth, but I refused to talk. Either way I was being put back into foster care. After another three years of bouncing from home to home, getting kicked out for fighting, stealing, or just being as nasty and mean as I could be to anyone who got too close, I ran away.

"When I was caught two states away and authorities looked into who I was, they decided to send me back to where I was born, Maine. Once more I was taken to that same hospital, and wouldn't you know it, that same nurse was there. I was eleven by that time, and she tried again to adopt me, but again the powers that be decided she was not fit to adopt me with just one income and no spouse. What a crock of shit. Not many people are looking for moody preteens to take home and call their own, so I was sent to a local group home. It was probably the best thing for me. No one tried to be a mommy or a daddy, no one tried getting close.

"Every week Ruth and her son David would come to visit me in the group home. I still don't know why she cared so much…" Emma sniffed at the memory of the woman who changed her life. Her head ached, maybe a little from the drinks, but mostly from trying to hold the tears at bay. "She was the first person I let into my heart, the first person I remember who chose to care about me. She petitioned for adoption seven times before a judge finally realized I was spending more time at her house than I was at the group home anyway. That or the adoption agency got tired of processing the same paperwork over and over, or maybe they realized she was more stubborn than they were. I was fourteen and a half when I officially moved in with the Nolan's. Ruth was my savior, and my brother David is the best brother a girl could have. I had three wonderful years with Ruth before she passed."

"What happened?"

"Brain aneurysm, it was so sudden." She'd gone further into her story than she'd anticipated, and choked back a sob as she remembered the end of the best years of her life.

Killian felt the jolt in Emma's body as she tried to hold back the pain. He tried not to, but how could he not feel some sort of sorrow for the life she'd been dealt? He'd promised no pity though, and he was a man of his word. Instead of offering any words, he just held her tighter, running a hand up and down her back and pressing soft kisses into her hair.

"I kind of spun out of control after her death. David was away at college when it happened, he and his high school sweetheart came home for the funeral. After they left to go back to college, I was right back where I'd always been, alone. I felt like happiness just wasn't in the cards for me. I found a guy who treated me like nothing special, we were two fucked up peas in a pod, I followed him to the west coast for a new start, and now we've come full circle."

"Thank you for sharing your story with me, Emma."

"No pity, you promised."

"No pity, love. I just want you to know I've never met such a tough lass. I admire you, Emma. You're smart, fierce, strong, passionate, kind, all things you instilled in yourself, long before Ruth was allowed to care for you. And here you are, on your way to a new beginning. Not many are brave enough to start anew with little more than their closest possessions and hope."

"Hope," Emma snorted. "You sound like Mary Margaret."

Killian cocked an eyebrow. "Who is this Mary Margaret?"

"She is a peddler of hope."

"Hope isn't a bad thing."

Emma knew he was absolutely right; Mary Margaret would have said the same thing, and she would have been right too. But she found that she actually believed it when Killian said it. She felt a tiny blossom of hope sprouting in her heart and it simultaneously hurt and soothed her soul. She didn't realize a tear had fallen until she heard Killian whispering to her not to cry.

He felt the tear hit his bare chest and his heart squeezed for this brilliant woman who had been through enough tragedy and neglect for two lifetimes. "Don't cry, lass."

Emma looked up, shedding several more tears even as he spoke the words. "Then help me clear my mind." She turned and straddled his lap, leaned into him and kissed his lips. "Make me forget."

"Never forget where you've come from, it makes you who you are. I like who you are, Swan." Killian murmured the heartfelt words against her salty, tear stained lips, kissing her between each few words. He'd help her to clear her mind, but he wouldn't ever want to change a single thing about her.

Kissing him breathless, Emma ground her hips against his, desperate to connect with him on that earth shattering level, the level she understood. She was loath to admit it, but this was the closest she'd felt to anyone in a long time, and it wasn't just physical anymore. "Make love to me Killian."

His breath caught in his throat as Emma whispered those intimate words into his ear. He had a feeling Emma Swan wasn't in the habit of making love, and he was over the moon that she wanted him to make love to her. "As you wish." Killian crashed his lips to hers once more and secured her in his grasp, hoping to convey just how passionately he wanted to care for her needs.

Princess Bride, Westley, she thought. That was one of her favorite movies of all time, combining all the perfect elements of an adventurous, love story. She shivered as she realized she wouldn't even mind if he meant exactly what Westley had meant each time he'd uttered the words as you wish to Buttercup. Who am I and where is the real Emma Swan? She whimpered into the kiss as his hands ghosted up her sides until he was cupping both her breasts and stroking his thumbs over her nipples.

Releasing her breasts and chuckling when she huffed at the loss, he tapped her butt and told her to sit up. "Don't go," he corrected when she lifted from his lap and started to step away. "Just let me get rid of these pesky trousers."

Emma placed her knee back down and lifted up, watching as Killian unbuttoned his pants and slid them down his thighs. He was already hard, and her mouth watered as she debated taking him with her mouth again. Part of her wanted that control right now, but the more dominant part truly did want him to make love to her, to take her slowly and lovingly.

He used his feet to slide his pants off the rest of the way, and coaxed Emma to sit back down so she was straddling him once more. The feel of skin against skin, warm and soft was heavenly; no friction yet, just touching. Killian firmly grasped her hip with one hand, rolling his thumb over her hip bone, while his other hand was drawn to her face. Staring into her eyes, trying to read every emotion she couldn't keep hidden, Killian traced his thumb from her chin, along her jaw, until his fingers could curl against the nape of her neck. Pulling her toward him, he placed a kiss to the corner of her mouth and worked his way across before darting his tongue out, seeking entrance. He practically purred when she sunk her fingers into his hair, pent up energy causing her fingers to dance through his locks and along his scalp.

Emma opened as his tongue licked along her lips, leaning into his body and tasting the emotion and desire behind his advances. Her breasts made contact with his chest, and his chest hair teased her to hardened peaks. She rubbed up against him seeking more than the delicate touch. She hummed contentedly as his mouth left hers and he kissed his way down her jaw, behind her ear, and finally to her neck. Her clit ached and her core clenched as he sucked and nipped at the sensitive flesh along the collar of her neck.

He let his lips travel along her neck, spending time in places where she made particularly lovely noises. Leaning forward he sucked a pebbled nipple into his mouth and was both rewarded and punished with her moans of pleasure. He worried her sounds alone might make him spill as his aching cock twitched against his stomach. Killian decided to sit back in the chair, and pulled her against his whole body, breasts back to his mouth, only this time her core met with his. It was the bit of heaven he needed as she instinctively rubbed herself along his length, spreading her warm wetness from base to tip. "Fucking hell, that feels amazing, love."

"Mmmm, you're so hard for me," Emma whispered. She loved how hot and hard he got, every single time, how all the blood rushed to his cock so he was swollen, and leaking with want.

"Always."

Despite how loaded that word was, Emma found she loved hearing it. She continued to grind up and down his length, pulling at his hair to bring his mouth back up to hers. The cool air hit her nipple as he released it, and she shivered before pressing against him, seeking the warmth of his body. "Make love to me."

Killian planted his hands at her hips, guiding her to his tip and she slid down his length unhindered, engulfing him in her slick walls. He held her there steadfastly, savoring the sensation of her sheathing his cock. Killian released her hips in favor of smoothing his hands over her ass to grasp both cheeks.

"Oh Killian, fuck you're so big, you feel so good." Emma rested her forehead against his and breathed in deeply as she adjusted to the welcomed intrusion. When she felt his hands gliding over her ass and gripping her cheeks she lifted slowly, enjoying the drag of his cock along her walls. On her every downstroke he pumped his hips into hers, giving a forceful thrust at the end of each pass.

Emma rode him slowly, arms back around his neck and fingers carded through his hair. And while Killian always had one hand squeezing and kneading the flesh of her perfect behind, the other was wrapped tightly into her hair that he'd pulled loose. Their bodies rocked together, her breasts rubbed deliciously against his chest, and their lips and tongues caressed and soothed.

Despite the languid pace, each found themself nearing bliss. It wasn't lost on Killian that the emotion tied into the evening was what was getting him there, and as much as she might want to deny it, Emma was also aware that the very real feelings were a large part of the reason her walls were already fluttering.

"Fuck!" Killian cursed and his whole body jerked. He broke the kiss and stared wide eyed at Emma. "I'm so sorry, love."

Emma just smiled; she already knew what he was going to say. She didn't even skip a beat, just kept her pace as she rode him. "It's okay, I'm on birth control, it's been awhile for me, so I know I'm clean. And... I trust you."

"I swear, I am clean." He reach a hand toward the table and scrambled for a condom.

"I believe you, no condoms." Emma grinned a little smug smile at him before closing the distance between them. She sucked his ear into her mouth and bit down softly, enjoying the growl the action elicited. "I am so close, Killian," she whispered hotly into his ear. "How about I come all over your bare cock this time?" She pulled her head back to see the affect her words had on him.

He was stunned to silence and starry eyed as he watched her ride him, the telltale signs of her climax clear in the slight increase in the stroke of her hips, the tightening of her walls, and the slackening of her mouth. Where the panic of forgetting the condom had briefly pulled him from the moment, her words and the anticipation of feeling her wet pulsing grip without the barrier brought him sprinting back toward the finish line. Killian pulled her mouth to his once more, and somehow he knew Emma felt the same thing - the need to be connected in that final way.

Emma had never experienced a speechless version of this man, and it was quite breathtaking as he still communicated with her, showing her everything she needed to know with the way he watched her, saw her, and then kissed her through the most soothing and sating orgasms she'd ever experienced. Her walls clenched hard around his cock, and she moaned quietly into his kisses, little yeses and his name falling from her lips.

"Emma," he rasped, clutching at her hips as he thrust into her a final time, releasing all he had to give deep inside her spasming walls. They broke the kiss to recover breathing, arms holding fast to each other, resting forehead to forehead. "That was…"

"I know," Emma said when he couldn't quite put into words what they'd just experienced. It was different, it was... special, she finished silently.

Later, as they drifted off to sleep wrapped in the others' arms, each found they had new hope sparking their hearts. Killian wondered if the possibility of real, true love did exist for him; perhaps his heart wasn't as jaded as he'd thought. And Emma wondered if home wasn't a place, but a person, as she reveled in the unfamiliar feelings Killian Jones was stirring in her heart.

They'd showered and packed up shortly before pulling into Union Station since they both had a train change to move on to their next destinations. After dressing as warmly as they could and stowing their luggage in the train terminal locker station they'd decided to make one last outing together. They sat quietly at the small cafe, each picking at their late lunch. Their little game of Q&A had continued throughout the remaining hours of their trip, and they'd gleaned more little pieces of the other. Now that their time was coming closer to the end, each was stuck in a quandary.

Killian wanted to know where she was headed to next, wanted her to stay with him, even just one more night, and was having a hard time keeping those thoughts to himself. He was nothing if not well spoken, he knew exactly what he wanted to say, but he also knew Emma didn't necessarily want to hear what he had to say. He'd found himself staring at her longingly more than once. Her reaction was a mix between a blush and a smile and sheer panic.

Emma wanted more with Killian Jones. More time, more of his body, more of his conversation and breathtaking smiles, she wanted things she hadn't wanted with anyone in a really long time, things she didn't think she'd ever want again. What she did not want was to admit any of that to herself, let alone to the man who sat looking at her like she was his end all, be all. "If you look at me any harder, you're going to drill a hole in my head."

Killian chuckled, but didn't break his eye contact. "Just thinking about what comes next, Swan."

Though her heart picked up an extra forty beats per minute, she remained outwardly calm. Doing what she does best, Emma Swan avoided the actual question behind his words like a pro. "Well my next train isn't until this evening, so I guess we could find something to do here in the Windy City."

Placing both his hands on the table palms up, he relented to her avoidance. "Let's make the best of the time we have left then. Care to go ice skating?"

"That sounds fun!" Emma placed both her hands into his waiting ones, knowing she had successfully turned the tables in her direction for now. Standing up and pulling him up too, Emma placed a chaste kiss to his lips. "Lead the way."

Killian pointed behind her to the small outdoor ice pond that he'd seen when they first arrived at the restaurant.

They settled the bill after arguing over who would pay. Emma won the debate as she threatened to not go ice skating if he wouldn't let her pay. She argued that she couldn't let him pay when she wasn't even paying for her train fare anymore, and she'd won in Winnemucca.

"Perfect," she exclaimed after lacing up her skates and stepping onto the ice.

"Almost like it was meant to be," he murmured.

Emma caught his words but chose not to comment. "I haven't been ice skating since before Ruth passed. We made a tradition of ice skating and hot cocoa at the local pond back home each year. We would go every Christmas Eve eve."

Killian grasped her hand in his and they started their way around the ice rink. "That's a lovely tradition, Swan. Why Christmas Eve eve?"

"On Christmas Eve itself we would always volunteer at the local soup kitchen. Ruth and David had been going every year since he was old enough to help, and I jumped at the chance to payback even a fraction of the gift she bestowed upon me. Do you have any traditions?"

"Not in many years. Although this year I am told I'm going with my brother and his wife to give back to society on Christmas Eve."

"I'm sure my brother and his wife still go to the soup kitchen, so I guess we will both be giving back to society on Christmas Eve." Emma smiled serenely as comforting thoughts of family and tradition flooded her. Suddenly she couldn't remember why she'd stayed away so long, and she felt a little ashamed. A stray thought flitted through her mind that she wouldn't have met Killian Jones if she'd decided to go home any earlier. As quickly as the thought arose she shooed it away.

A sudden image of Emma working to feed the less fortunate popped into his mind, and he was right beside her. He could see the white apron tied around her, hair pulled back and that same contented smile on her lips. His eyes watered and his throat tightened as he shook the images that would never be a reality from his thoughts. What has this woman done to me, he lamented. He was seeing a future, and the word love ricocheted around his brain.

One moment they were looking into each other's eyes as the world around them stood still, while they floated across the ice with the overwhelming urge to make grand declarations, and the next they were staring up at the sky. A fit of giggles took over Emma's body as Killian groaned beneath her, because of course when they'd fallen he'd saved her by taking the brunt of the hard ice impact.

"Are you alright?" she asked.

"Aye, just a bruised tailbone and ego."

"It would take so much more for that inflated ego to bruise," she teased him.

Killian laughed loudly at that, threading his fingers through her hair, he brought her face to his and kissed her soundly.

Emma kissed him back, and her heart swelled painfully in her chest as she realized his kisses were slowly coming to an end. "Damn wind," she muttered as her eyes watered. She swiped at the tears she was going to swear were the result of the icy wind as it swept over them.

Killian hadn't even noticed the weather around them as he was so consumed by her. When he looked around he realized a light snow had started to fall. Emma looked even more beautiful with her wind grazed pink cheeks and snowflakes sticking to her hair and eyelashes. He fought against the words asking her to stay with him, because he knew it would ruin everything.

"Mommy, are they hurt?" a little voice questioned from behind them.

They both chuckled as they realized they were making spectacles of themselves. Emma heaved herself off of Killian and they helped each other to stand up. They stood facing each other, Killian cocked an eyebrow as if he wished to say something, but no words left his mouth.

"Race ya!" Emma shouted as she let go of his hands and took off as fast as she could. She was a damned chicken, but she couldn't risk hearing the words that were locked behind that loving look he had been giving her.

"Now who's cheating?" he called behind her. He'd been saved by her self preservation. Taking long strides Killian quickly caught up to her and swatted her ass. He passed her and then turned so he was skating backwards. "Cheaters never win, Swan," he taunted.

Emma rolled her eyes and sped up her pace as she pushed off the ice harder. They hurdled toward the side of the rink, each determined to best the other. "Tie," she shouted as they reached the end of the ice.

"All right, I'll give you a tie," he conceded.

"What do you mean, give me?" Emma slapped his chest. "It was totally a tie!"

Killian laughed loudly at the competitive streak in Emma Swan as he led her over to a bench. They took off their skates and Killian offered to take hers back. Emma let herself get lost in thoughts of the past couple days; this was the happiest she'd been in years. She truly was at a loss as she wondered if it was all due to the hot Brit who'd taken up residence in her life, or if it was the clean start she was making. She was interrupted by the very savory smell of hot chocolate when Killian returned with two of the beverages in hand.

"Cinnamon?" Emma asked incredulously.

"Aye, it's the way my sister-in-law drinks it, and swears it's the best way to have it. I can get you a new one if you don't like it."

"No way!" She pulled the styrofoam cup out of his reach as he grabbed for it. "Your sister-in-law is absolutely correct. I was just shocked because I thought you guessed how I like it. That was a Ruth Nolan secret topping for cocoa."

"I guess it's not so secret anymore," he chuckled as he sipped his own drink.

"Guess not." Emma giggled when he pulled his cup away and had a little whipped cream mustache. Instead of wiping it away, she leaned up to kiss it from his lips. "You taste good."

"As do you, love." He wrapped his free arm around her waist and pulled her close to kiss her more firmly.

"Let's take a picture," Emma suggested. She pulled her phone out and held it at arm's length.

Killian snuggled up next to her so they were cheek to cheek and smiled for the camera. Once she had snapped a shot, he kissed her on the cheek and rested his forehead to her temple, unaware that she was still snapping pictures. "Send me the picture, love?" He knew it was a long shot - that would require exchanging information.

A moment later he got an AirDrop notification and ten new photos awaited his approval. He accepted them, and decided to take a chance. After Emma put her phone away, he AirDropped his contact information to her, then swooped her up into another passionate kiss to distract her from the notification.

They walked hand in hand back to the station as the hour of departure grew nearer. A comfortable but somber silence had set in as each fretted over the coming separation. Killian pulled his bag out of the locker, set it down beside him and pulled Emma's duffel bag out, handing it over to her. When she reached to take it, he grabbed her hand with his. "Don't go, Swan."

"Killian don't," she whispered, "don't make this more difficult than it already is."

"It doesn't have to be difficult. Just don't go."

"I have to go, Killian. I'm going home to start over."

"Then tell me where that is. We are both headed to the east coast, perhaps we'll be closer than we think."

"To Chicago," she murmured. "You said to Chicago, nothing more."

"Well what if I want more, what if you want more?"

Emma wanted to tell him she didn't want more, but she couldn't lie to him. She'd never had an issue lying to someone before to avoid messy feelings, but as he stood there looking at her with clear tenderness and devotion, she just couldn't make her lips form the words. Leaning into his body she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him. Emma poured everything she felt but would never say, into that kiss. "I'm sorry..." she whispered against his lips.

Killian's spirits lifted as she conveyed her true feelings into their kiss. He heard her apology and wanted to tell her there was nothing to apologize for since she was back in his arms. Before he could speak though, she'd broken from their embrace.

"...but I can't take the chance that I'm wrong about you." Inhaling deeply against the vice like squeeze in her chest, she squared her shoulders, prayed her voice wouldn't crack with the sobs that were mere seconds from spilling forth and looked him in the eye. "Goodbye, Killian." Her prayer went unanswered as one sob escaped with her final words.

And before he could make another plea, she turned and fled. "Goodbye, Emma," he whispered brokenly.