Sorry, I had hoped to get this posted last weekend, but as is my life right now, shit happens and we had a really rough week with my Dad, so no time to edit. But, it's here now and I hope you enjoy this one...
2.
"I really appreciate you popping over this afternoon, Mum," I told her as I placed the teapot on the kitchen table and pulled out a chair to sit down beside her.
"Oh, it's not a problem darling," she patted my hand. "Your Dad said he fancied a drive anyway."
"Well, I know Ron will be grateful for the help. And me," I rolled my eyes as I watched my Dad and my husband out in the back garden. "He's been driving me nuts about this barbecue," I chuckled.
"Like I said, we don't mind. Besides, it's a good excuse for me to visit with you and the grandchildren," she smiled indulgently as her grandson came skipping inside with a big grin on his face. He gave his Nana a brief hug and then disappeared off in the house somewhere. "But where is Rose?" she wondered, looking around for her, as though expecting her to follow Hugo inside.
"She's at a school friends birthday party. I have to collect her soon, actually." I glanced at my watch to check the time and then looked outside again to see how the men were getting on putting the new barbecue together. "Ron has been itching to try barbecuing himself ever since the last time we came for dinner at your house," I laughed, watching them struggle with the legs on it. "So, the children and I bought him one for Father's day," I explained, even though she already knew that.
Ron had been struggling to put it together himself the last few days, since there wasn't much need for them in our Magical lives, he wasn't so familiar with screws and spanners and things. Arthur had tried to help Ron out on his last visit, but, he'd been a little too over enthusiastic at being able to put his Muggle tools to some use, so he'd just finished up bending most of the screws and somehow accidentally set the instructions on fire.
I'd managed to find some more screws the same size from a DIY store and then mentioned to my Dad that Ron was having a bit of trouble, so he'd offered to help and had popped over this weekend.
"I'm sure you will all love it. Making a meal is so fast and easy in the summer when you have a barbecue," she smiled, picking up her teacup.
"You'll stay for dinner, won't you?" I asked. "Ron will be eager to try it out. I know we have some sausages in, then I can call at the shop when I go to pick Rosie up. I can get some steaks and chicken, and…."
"Mum," Hugo patted my arm from beside me.
"One second sweetheart," I told him. "I can do some potatoes and make a big salad, then buy something quick for dessert," I decided.
"That would be lovely!" she smiled, seemingly thrilled at the idea.
"Mummy!" Hugo pulled at the sleeve of my blouse again.
"Mummy is talking sweetheart," I told him, not looking behind me as I patted him on the head. He huffed.
"I'll help you prepare the salad and the men can cook the meat. Makes them believe they're chefs or something," she chuckled.
I nodded and smiled, watching Ron scratching his head outside as he bemusedly watched my Dad easily fit the last screw in. As fascinated as he was with the idea of screws and bolts, I knew he still thought Magic was much easier. "Ron will love it," I smiled and sipped on my own tea.
"Some fresh fruit and ice cream for dessert might be nice," Mum suggested.
"Oh! I could get some strawberries from the farm down the road, then we could make a…"
"Mum!" Hugo lost his patience as he interrupted me. "What's this?" he asked, slamming something down on the kitchen table between us and looking at me with curiosity.
I glanced at the item and was about to reprimand him for interrupting us when I realised what it was. The item was startlingly pink, rather long and rubbery. My eyes widened as I snatched it up quickly, though Mum had already spotted it and was tying desperately not to splutter over her tea.
"Where on earth did you find this Hugo?" I hissed at my four year old son.
He shrugged, carelessly. "In your room."
"You went searching in mine and daddy's room?" I asked.
"No," he replied, innocently. "My ball bounced in there, I went to get it and I just saw that on the floor. It looks funny, can I play with it?" he asked hopefully.
"No you may not. It's...it's..." I looked to Mum for help, but she had turned bright red, a scandalous look on her face as she eyed the object in my hand. I tried to hide it in my pocket, knowing my face was bright red as well and Mum was now trying not to laugh at me.
"But, what is it?" he asked, screwing up his little, freckled nose as he threw his hands in the air.
"It's...erm, er…probably just something silly from Daddy's shop. So you can't play with it because it's probably not safe yet," I told him. "Why don't you pop outside and ask your Dad and Grandpa if they would like a drink?" I asked, hoping to distract him as I turned him around by the shoulders to face the back door.
He shrugged and skipped off outside. I glanced at my Mum, her hand was covering her mouth, seemingly amused and embarrassed at the same time. I didn't know what to tell her or how to explain how this item had come to be on our bedroom floor.
"I, erm," I bit my bottom lip, not having an answer for her. Just at that moment Ron came in and grabbed a glass from the counter, filling it with cold water from the tap.
"What do you reckon?" he asked, nodding towards the window after he'd taken a few gulps of water. "Your Dad was just showing me how to get the coals hot enough and..."
"Ron, I need a word with you a moment," I told him, jumping up from my seat. Grasping hold of his wrist, I began to pull him from the kitchen. "Excuse us." I told mum.
"Ohh-kay," Ron replied confused as I yanked him into our home office and closed the door.
I spun him around to face me and produced the rubbery item which jiggled as I pulled it from the folds of my blouse – I hadn't been able to fit it in my pocket.
"What the hell is that?" he laughed, taking it from me and waving it around.
"Stop it!" I hissed and grabbed for it again. Big mistake, somehow I managed to hit the switch on it so that it began to vibrate and rotate. Ron laughed even more as I flapped my hands over it trying to turn the damn thing off. Once I shut it down, I tossed it onto the desk, not wanting to hold it anymore. "Your son," I poked Ron in the centre of his chest with my finger, "just brought that to me. In front of my mother!" I told him, mortified.
"But...isn't that," he frowned, "one of those….sexy toys? A vibrating?" he wondered.
"A vibrator. Yes." I nodded once.
"What do you have one for?" he asked me, sounding alarmed.
"I don't!" I huffed at the suggestion I'd been hiding something from him. "I actually wasn't even aware one of those things existed in our house! Hugo says he found it on the floor in our bedroom." I placed my hands on my hips, waiting for his explanation because I couldn't fathom where it had come from at all. "Care to explain how that ended up there?"
"Well, don't look at me. Why the bloody hell would I have one of those?" he stabbed his finger towards it.
"It came from somewhere Ron and I certainly haven't a clue where from. It's not something I would ever buy."
"Me neither! I haven't the faintest idea…oh, hang on," he held up one finger as he seemed to remember something and then a smirk grew on his face until he was laughing out loud again. I'm glad this was so amusing to him!
"What in Merlin's name is so damn funny?" I demanded, failing to find how this was remotely funny. Your four year old child waving around sex toys in front of his grandma was never amusing in my eyes!
"Don't you remember?" he asked me, then continued when he saw from the look on my face that I obviously didn't. "This," he held up the offending article, between finger and thumb, "was our dear friend, Seamus' idea of a wonderful wedding present for us." he chuckled.
I thought back, vaguely wondering how my husband could remember facts I apparently didn't. And then it came to, a distant memory of Seamus giving us his present, barely able to talk through his hysterics. Obviously, he thought it absolutely hilarious, as had George and Charlie when we'd unwrapped it at Seamus' insistence, right there on the dance floor. Whilst Ron and I had been so humiliated and just tried to hide the damn thing. "Yes, I do remember that," I whispered. "Though that doesn't explain why our son found it today."
Ron shrugged and then looked down at what he was wearing. "I suppose I could have knocked it out from under the bed. See," he went on to explain when I looked at him confused, "it's rather warm today, so I fancied wearing shorts. I pulled that box out from under the bed with all our holiday clothes in it. I suppose I could have dislodged it so that it rolled out with the box and I never noticed. Sorry." he added.
"Why do we even still have it?" I grimaced at the object.
Ron shrugged, "I guess it got shoved under the bed and forgotten about when we moved in. Maybe, at one time, I thought it might've been fun to try it out sometime," he admitted.
I gave him a horrified look – he was going no where near me with that damn thing! We were getting rid of it!
His eyes flashed as he looked up at me then. "So...you don't fancy..."
"No I do not!" I didn't even let him finish as I folded my arms across my chest.
"It might be fun. Change things up a bit," he waggled his eyebrows.
"I'm perfectly satisfied with the way things are in that department, thank you." I informed him, gaining a smug grin from my husband at my unintentional compliment. Ron was and always had been a good lover, we didn't need any mechanical props. "Get rid of it!" I warned him, pointing at the offending item. "I don't care what you do with it, but I don't want to see it again."
"Fine," he held up his hands in surrender. "Wait, where are you going?" he asked, when he saw me transfiguring my flip-flops into a pair of shoes and summoning my bag from the living room.
"I need to pop to the shops for something for dinner and then pick our daughter up from Madeline's birthday party," I answered him. "Meanwhile, you can go and explain to your mother -in-law why her grandson found sex toys on our bedroom floor!" I gave him a fake smile and then with a twirl, Disapparated away.
If you liked this one, please let me know :)
And thank you so much to everyone who left a review to the previous story. I will try to reply to all those I can in the next couple of days.
I'll also try to get the next one edited in time to post next weekend, but no promises right now.
Thanks again
xC
