PUU.
By: ZedXTReaTz
:::Puu is…
Naruto does not belong to me.
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"School. Don't you just LOVE school? Don't you just love to pay attention to your wonderful, totally NOT boring, teachers during class, eat the same cafeteria food which pretty much could pass for hospital food or even see the same friggin ass dull faced classmates every day of your MISERABLE. SHITTASTICAL. LIFE?"
Eyebrows were instantly arched at the blonde's speech, or sarcastic statement towards his "love" for daily school life.
Everyone ignored his ranting except for his kohai in an orange lollipop mask, who applauded him.
They were all skipping classes at the back of the school building; which was their usual routine.
A very blue skinned boy then yawned, "Hey, has anyone seen Itachi?"
The groupie halted their actions and scanned the area.
"Yeah…now that you mention it…" Deidara had finished his complaining, joining in the current topic.
Tobi was the first to throw a tantrum, "Tobi thinks it's strange for Itachi to be late for school!"
"Bet you five bucks he forgot his contact lenses," Kakuzu said dully, never looking up from counting his money.
"I'm hungry," the very creepy Zetsu stated, unconsciously causing everyone to slowly…back…away…
Kisame cleared his throat, "Annnyyywhhooo…just wondering; did anyone see something strange on their way to school today?"
"Oh! Oh! Today, Tobi's buggers started talking!"
Again, another retreating step was made by the juveniles.
"By strange," Sasori sat up, "As in something with pink hair?"
The group of boys were briefly surprised that the indifferent Sasori caught an interest in the topic.
Zetsu and Kakuzu denied seeing anything, however, the rest of them related to the redhead.
"You're right, yeah! There was some freaky chick who was speaking a foreign language!" Deidara hopped up.
Kisame snorted, "More like she was lacking vocabulary."
"Tobi likes her bubble gum hair!" the hyper teen added.
"…Me too…" a voice agreed.
Everyone immediately shifted their gazes at who ever said that and to their disbelief, it was Sasori.
He, however, pretended to be indulged in his novel labelled "The Puppet Master."
They all mentally decided to shake off what he had said. Well, they knew he WOOD be full of surprises (A/N ba dum tss! See what I did there? :D *insert cricket noises*…ok I'll shut up now)
"Hmm… a girl with pink hair, huh," Kakuzu wondered aloud, "Maybe we could put her up for an auction."
Kisame chuckled, "Maybe we should-I mean- it's not every day you get a chance to witness a chick with pink hair."
"Tobi's seen anime girls with pink hair!"
"Well this is reality dumbass," Deidara spat.
"Have any of you considered she just simply dyed her hair?" Zetsu pointed out.
Insert awkward silence here.
"Where the heck is Hidan and Itachi!?"
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Itachi was a rather composed and apathetic fellow. He would let nothing chuck through his barrier of coldness and disinterest. If he were to respond to a situation with any trace of sentiment, in a blink of an eye, he'd whack the eye-squinting ball which contained that horrifying word…"feeling."
Though, why was the infamous cool headed Uchiha frantically searching his high school from head to toe?
Two words; BAD. LUCK.
It was childish to think this but he blamed this morning's horoscope reading. Oh why did he have to be a Gemini?
"OI!" a figure came darting to Itachi in full speed, "Did you find her!?"
It took a while for the Uchiha to distinguish who the person was until he drew closer; breathless.
'I forgot my contact lenses at home…' he inwardly sulked.
Itachi simply shook his head in denial as his purple eyed ally cursed under his breath.
"Dammit!" Hidan furiously punched a near-by locker, "Who the fuck brings a pink haired weirdo to school anyway!?"
Itachi slightly narrowed his gaze, "You're just as responsible as I am."
Hidan irritably clicked his tongue and slouched down to the floor while Itachi calmly looked away.
'It's still his (fuckin') fault,' their minds thought in unison.
There was then a pregnant and annoyed air between them until the boisterous one of the two sliced the pissed atmosphere.
"All I'm sayin' is if you didn't release them damn pheromones all over her, she mightn't of friggin followed you to school and disappear in the first place…" Hidan muttered in the opposite direction.
A vein had almost popped up on the raven head's forehead, though, thankfully, Itachi had become skilled at keeping his cool since birth.
"Hn, but if you hadn't fed her those cookies, she wouldn't have become so hyperactive and out of control triggering her to run away," he spoke in his standard monotone.
Hidan immediately sprang up, "Hey! I didn't feed that to her! That bitch took it when I wasn't fucking lookin' alright!"
Itachi twitched his eyebrows, "Either way, we need to find her before anyone else does."
"Yeah…" Hidan glanced at the clock above, "Shit. First period is almost over; only 10 more minutes left!"
Itachi pondered, 'We need more help. But who would…'
"Ah."
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"Who loses a girl with PINK - I repeat-PIIIINNKKKK hair?" Kisame dryly emphasized.
Deidara folded his arms, "So this is why you guys were late, yeah?"
"Never mind that; can you assist us or not?" Itachi hurriedly got to the point.
"Um…why is Itachi-san talking to that tree?" Tobi obviously pointed out.
"HA! Told you he'd forget his contacts home! SLAP ME WITH YO MONEY BITCHES!" Kakuzu danced on a pole like a maniac (it magically appeared) while everyone else regrettably showered him with their five dollar bills.
"Shit shit SHIITTTT! Let's get this crap over with before that stupid ass leader finds out!" Hidan barked, though didn't realize a presence was behind him until the others took one step back.
"Too late," Sasori mumbled, not caring as he was still reading his novel.
Hidan felt a hand took a hold his shoulder and he resistibly turned around; noting those well acquainted and haunting piercings.
'Fuck me.'
"Now…who's a 'stupid ass leader' my dear Hidan?" his smile was the most menacing thing known to man.
Sweat trickled down said boy's face, "P-Pein-sam—
"WRONG ANSWER."
"Ah-no-W-WAIT! I didn't mean—GAHHHH!
After a good beating, Hidan had K.O'd and Pein was fully satisfied.
"So…" the "kind and gentle" leader's eyes finally landed on the rest of the groupie as they instantly stiffened.
"What is this "secret" you all are hiding?" Pein loomed over the boys as if they were merely ants.
"Leader, I can explain—
"Itachi that's a rock!"
"Damn, someone get that guy some glasses, yeah!"
Pein let out an exasperated sigh.
*2 minutes of hassled explanations later*
"Who loses a girl with pink hair?" leader rhetorically questioned blatantly.
"That's what I said," Kisame shrugged.
"So what do you think our actions should be, leader-sama?" Tobi questioned before Itachi got the chance, "Leader-sama? Something wrong?"
"Did this "pink hair girl" happen to make strange noises of any kind?" Pein examined their faces.
Kisame arched an eyebrow, "Yeah… like a "Tuu" or something I think…"
Their orange top leader face palmed with a thunderous slap causing the group to jerk up.
"L-Leader…?"
"This is bad…this is really really bad," it was a first and amusing moment for the boys to witness their typically calm and stable leader on edge.
"What's the matter Leader-sama?" Kisame jumped to the question.
"Haa…remember when I told you guys about my brother having this hobby on conducting crazy experiments?" Pein pinched his neat nose bridge and stood up from the grassland.
The boys nodded with suspense (except for Hidan who was still unconscious on the ground)
"Well, one of his crazy experiments had escaped from his lab…and…"
"And…?" Zetsu pushed on while eating-…was he eating a plant?
"And the 'run away experiment' happened to be that girl. She's actually a…
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Meanwhile...
"…"
"Puu!"
"…who are you…?"
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Yay~ and the story begins. I hope this chapter was at least a little bit enjoyable. And LE GASP!? Did I just leave this at a cliff hanger? ;D Oh noeessss
Let's play a game, shall we? Who could guess what she is?
-ZedXTReaTz-
