Author: Cha-Cha

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or the show so please don't sue.

Warning: Child abuse, still.

A/N: BigTeddy: Thank you for being my first reviewer! I'm glad you like the friendship between them, I have to say there are far too few which is just about their friendship! I hope I updated quickly enough for you!

Theo Darkstar: Glad you think so, I was trying to make it different but still focused on the boys.

Summerlovin9191: Well,, here is the second, and final, chapter, glad you like the story!

The door squeaked as it opened, revealing Harold standing in the doorway. Sirius panicked slightly, if he really was the person who had hurt James so much, he certainly didn't want to be alone with him.

'Hello Sirius, how are you feeling this morning?' Sirius gave no answer, and just stared at the man he'd always thought so kindly of. Seeing the book in the boy's hand, Harold gave a sigh, he had a feeling he knew why there was no answer. 'It's not me, just keep reading Sirius, it'll explain everything.' Sirius stared at him; unsure what to think still, his eyes stayed on the man until after James' father had left the room again. He had nothing to loose though by reading on, and so he turned to the next page dreading what he was about to read but at the same time almost curious at Harold's cryptic statement..

Mum is getting worse. With every blow he lands on her, she weakens. She still smiles but it is becoming harder. She tells me to be strong, but I feel as though as my strength grows, I sap the strength from her. St Mungo's gave her some potions and she seems to be better. Her hands shake though, but she will live, not as long as she would have done, but for a number of years yet. I don't know what I'd do without her.

Sir's left her alone after the instructions from Mungo's came; wants to be seen as the doting husband I suppose. No one knows he did it, he killed her. His hands dripping in the years he stole from her, his smile never leaving his face.

She doesn't heal anymore, her power is too fluctuating. Her brain is hurt so she has less control; she is as I am with my accidental magic. He praises me with friends about my successes of my accidental magic then beats me in private for the pain I cause him as the magic hurts him when he strikes me. I have no control, but it seems to me, neither does he.

Sirius could feel his own hands begin to shake. He had never asked why Anna's hands shook, nor had he mentioned how he did notice that she never used magic, no matter how much covering his friend and James' father tried did, but he had never even begun to suspect this. He turned to the next page, almost not wanting to know what other secrets he was about to find out about the Potter family. They seemed to the world as though they had everything and yet the things he was reading about really struck home at how similar his and James' home lives were.

Mum killed Sir today.

Sirius stopped; his eyes were glued to the first sentence. Mum killed Sir today. Then Anna, the sweet lady who treated him with more kindness then anyone else had shown him, killing a man! Sirius just couldn't believe what he was reading, but after the last few pages, he supposed he shouldn't be that surprised. If her magic was fluctuating, it would be like accidental magic, even if she used her wand. It was probably an accident. He just pushed her too far and her magic took over, trying to protect her. Mum killed Sir today. Then if Sir was dead, who was the man James introduced as his father? He carried on reading, hoping there would be a clue.

She didn't mean to and the judge understood. He tried to hit me in front of her and the magic flowed. Guess she had less control today. He flew into the wall. There was a coat hook. Everyone mourns Him; all but Mum and I. We knew him all too well; the only ones who ever saw the true side of Sir. Uncle Harold didn't mourn either, he put his arms around Mum and she cried. I was scared. Did she want Him back? Did need him? I tried to tell her it was okay, I would look after her, we didn't need him. Mum and Uncle Harold smiled. She said she was relieved, who cries when they're relieved? I didn't understand, not in any of my books did they explain what to do now. What would happen to us?

Uncle Harold! Sirius' mind raced, Anna had married the brother of her husband, and that was the man James called father? Or was the man downstairs a different Harold? He re read the last sentence and gave a sad smile. It was a sentence very typical of James. The Marauders had quickly caught onto the discovery that some things James just couldn't understand, like these types of emotions and ways of showing it especially if there wasn't a story where something similar had happened. Gradually over the years, this had faded away as they explained things to him the reactions he just couldn't seem to grasp. He supposed he had never had things like that explained to him, while Sirius had made a point of studying people while at the Snob parties, as he liked to call them, he was forced to go to when he was younger. Of course now he was disowned he would never have to go to one of those again. Turning the page once more, he smiled as he read the first line; things could only get better for James now.

Uncle Harold moved in today. He was Sir's brother. Mum say's she loves him. I don't understand. Mum says she loves me but this is a different type of love, a love between a man and woman, husband and wife. I didn't understand why Mum wanted to start the hurt again, but she told me that wasn't love, whatever love there had been vanished when his fist connected with her face. Is hope he is different, Mum needs someone, I need someone. She shakes even more now, but the Healers tell her it won't get worse, she will survive. And because of that, so will I.

Well, that explained Harold's statement earlier Sirius thought back, but to think, the man James called his father was actually his Uncle; that was just odd! But no matter whom Harold really was; Sirius could easily see that the man truly loved James, and maybe, just maybe he could eventually love Sirius like that, he hoped so anyway.

Father. Dad. I finally have one. Mum and Dad got married. He was proud of me. He taught me to fly, emotionally and physically. Sent me on my first broomstick and I was flying high in the sky, he never even told me how to do it, it was as though I had been born to fly. When I came down he smiled and hugged me, told me how good and proud he was of me.

When I woke up screaming and sweating from my nightmare, he held me tightly, as Mum tried to do before Sir stopped her. He stayed with me all night; I fell asleep in his arms.

He tells me stories of far away lands, of friends I will make and how the future is so much brighter. He is my father. Blood doesn't matter, it is deeds not the blood that counts, Merlin knows Sir spilt enough of my blood.

When I first called him Dad, he asked me not too. He felt he was stealing his brother's child, even if he was violent and unloved by us. I told him he had earned it; I never called Sir by that name, only a person who truly deserved that name would be called by that name. He smiled and stopped arguing. I suppose I will understand in time, and when I have children, I will earn that name, just as I forced my father to, and by father I do not mean Sir. He is Sir and only Sir, my father was Uncle Harold.

I will hold them when they awaken from nightmares, they will know how proud I am of them and I will give my life to make sure they are safe. He will keep his innocence, a pleasure I was not allowed and he shall be happy, as happy as I am now.

Re reading the page once more, he felt as though he could relate to James' thoughts. To him, Father was always that, Father. He had never been Dad or Daddy or Dada or any of the other names children give their parents, but instead the cold, aloof man who demanded he was to be called Father. The examples James had given may as well have been foreign concepts to him, his Father had never taught him to fly, instead handing him a broomstick and demanding the house elf keep an eye on him to make sure he didn't hurt himself too badly. After his nightmares, he had been told firmly to go back to bed, and if he cried out or protested at all, he was beaten for showing such a weakness unworthy of being a Black. He'd never had anyone who cared for him as Harold did for James; he was almost jealous. Maybe he would have been jealous if he hadn't read what Sir had done to the child; his friend deserved that kind of happiness.

Maybe his mother was right; he was just a blood traitor who would never amount to anything, always fleeing when things got rough, James had survived all that and was still strong, he was incredibly weak compared to James; hell he was just a weak, pathetic, mudblood lover, just as his mother had always told him, not that he approved of the wording; guess she was right after all. The tears that he thought had run out earlier came once again as he curled up into a ball, the notebook fell to the floor, but he didn't even notice, nor when it flipped to the last page.

'Don't ever, EVER say that Siri, that bitch was wrong about everything!' James voice reached his ears before arms once again held him. Sirius hadn't even realised he'd spoken out loud.

'No, she was right, I did just run away when things got rough, you never did though, you stuck through it all.' Sirius mumbled weakly into James' chest.

'I was too young to do anything else; I had no other options except to stay but unlike you I had my Mum with me, she shielded me from some of it and got me through the times; you've had no one like that in your house. Both of your parents were abusing you, and that's what it was, abuse. In my eyes you are strong. You put up with Howler after Howler from them and on top of that been beaten and abused at home, I don't think I would be strong enough to live with that, I would have run long ago.'

'You did have it done to you, but you still stayed; I'm just weak.'

'No, you are not!' James retorted forcefully. 'You are incredibly strong and don't you dare say otherwise. We've both lived through absolute horrors no one should ever have to feel and we made it through. I've had lots of support and help from my family, now it's your turn. You've survived, now you get to heal, like I've been doing. I still get nightmares about what he did to me, but I no longer live waiting for someone else to treat me how he did; and I'm going to be there for you like I have been since that first Howler and how I've wanted to be since you first went home, you always were my strength, someone I wanted to be like.'

'What are you talking about?'

'You always stood up for what you believed in, you didn't give into what your parents wanted and instead found the best things in life instead of focusing on the negative, you showed me how to be my own age and how to live.'

'I always thought that of you. You taught me to laugh and how to have fun, I guess we owe each other a lot more than we realised.' Sirius answered, wiping away the last of his tears before trying to pull away from his friend slightly, only to find James wouldn't let him go.

'I guess we do,' James agreed. 'Did you read the last page?' He asked, spotting where the notebook had fallen open, feeling Sirius shaking his head, James picked the book up and let Sirius go, but still sat close enough to touch, before handing it over, motioning for him to read.

Tomorrow I will start Hogwarts. I will be a new man. I cannot call myself a boy, I have seen far too much in my 11 years, and still my longing, to be wrapped up in those blankets again, my mother and father protecting me from the cruel world is still there. I have safety and love now, but I cannot forget what has happened, no matter how much I wish I could. I will not let myself be hurt like that again. I will make friends and forget these horrors I have been forced to live. I will have my childhood and I will have fun. The pain will only remind me why this is so important it is to have fun, a concept Dad is teaching me. He loves pranks, a love I can only hope to find in another, a love we can share and spread. Everyone needs happiness in the dark times Mum says is coming.

Anyway, this will be my last entry. Hogwarts is for new beginnings; and this diary will only remind me of the shadow I have only just emerged from. I have the light now, and in the light I will stay, even if these means fighting for it, and so I must bid you farewell and open my arms to the life I shall embrace with my body and soul. Farewell and welcome.

'I remember that day, the first day we met, on the train.' Sirius reminisced.

'Me too Paddy, me too.' James agreed, casting his mind back with a smile.

Walking down the corridor, Sirius was only sure of one thing, he had to find a different carriage from his cousins. The only one he could stand was Andromeda but she had left Hogwarts a number of years before Sirius had started. Narcissa, a sixth year, and Bellatrix, a fourth year, however were still there, and he hated them while return they hated him.

All of his family were expecting him to be sorted into Slytherin ,as was the Black family tradition, but he wasn't too sure he wanted to go there, Gryffindor sounded a lot better, but he knew there would be hell to pay of that happened, it was nice to dream though.

Finally reaching a carriage that only had one person in; a small, be-speckled boy whose raven hair seemed to stick out in random directions he supposed it was better than nowhere since all the other carriages were full.

Sliding open the door, he saw the boy looking up, he seemed to be about the right age for another first year.

'Hi, I'm Sirius Black, do you mind if I sit here?' He introduced himself cheerfully, the boy shook his head.

'As long as you don't mind sitting next to a Potter. I'm James.' The other boy introduced himself. A Potter, interesting. He shrugged his shoulders as he dragged his trunk in, and with James' help managed to get it on the shelf.

'Thanks, so, what are you into?' James grinned at this.

'Quidditch ,I love to fly, what about you?'

'Me too, I really want to be a Beater on the team.'

'I prefer Chaser, real shame they don't let first years onto the teams.'

'What about pranks?' Sirius' eyes lit up.

'I haven't really been able to pull any. Yet' Sirius answered causing James to grin.

'I suppose we'll just have to change the yet part, I think we're going to get on fine!'

'So do I, so do I.' Sirius agreed, a mischievous smile spreading across his face, while watching his new friend to do the same.

And so from there their friendship had gone; only growing in leaps and bounds when they managed to get into Gryffindor together.

'Why didn't you ever tell us, me?' Sirius asked, not too sure if he was hurt that James had never told him these things, but then again he doubted James knew the true extent of his own home life. James sighed and looked at his hands which were in his lap.

'I just wanted to forget about it. I know in the notebook I said I would remember, but it was hard. I loved Hogwarts, it was so fresh and to bring in all that, it just seemed it would ruin it somehow.' He snorted, 'besides, its hardly something you can slip into a conversation, from hey this Quidditch game is brilliant to guess what, my biological father beat me and my mum for Merlin knows how long until she accidentally killed him and now my father is actually my Uncle. There never really was a good time to bring it up.' Sirius nodded in understanding before a heavy silence came over the room until Sirius finally broke it.

'He'd beaten me and whipped me when I ran. He'd been starving me for a while, then throwing me around and punching me, using curses and hexes I'd never heard of as well as unforgivables, I just…' he trailed off, trying to think of how to put it into words, James didn't interrupt, he could see Sirius needed to get this off his chest. 'I just couldn't do it any more; I couldn't let him do that to me. Everyday was worse than the one before til I finally snapped, I just grabbed everything and ran.'

'You did the right thing,' James reassured him, 'it makes me cold with dread with what they would have done to you if you had stayed. I don't think they would have stopped til you were dead.'

'Me too,' Sirius agreed quietly before leaning against James., placing his head on the younger boys shoulder, the two of them enjoying the silence that surrounded them comfortably, listening only to the rain that continued to beat down on the windows outside.

Eventually going downstairs, as the smell of breakfast rousted them from their room, the two of them walked into the kitchen, both of them now dressed, to see Anna and Harold sitting there, waiting for them.

'How are you feeling you two?' Anna asked as her husband floated the plates over to each of their places on the table.

'A lot better, thank you, mum.' Sirius tried out the word, delighting the Potters. He had been worried they wouldn't want him to use those names, but was instantly reassured by their expressions, even James seemed to be happy about it.

'Glad to hear it son,' Harold finished, causing a surprised, but not unhappy smile from Sirius, who didn't notice the subtle wink Harold gave James. He finally got it! James thought excitedly, Dad's finally accepting blood doesn't matter, the conversation from earlier that morning coming back to him.

'I'm fine too,' James told them as Sirius sat down. James meanwhile went round and hugged each of his parents. 'Thank you for giving me an older brother!' he thanked them enthusiastically, causing joyous laughter to erupt from everyone, including his new brother.

'It was a pleasure Jamie, and I didn't even have to carry him around for nine months either!' Anna joked, allowing the laughter to carry on. Breakfast continued on like this until everything was cleared and Harold had cleaned all of the dishes.

'So what shall we do today?' Sirius asked.

'Quidditch,' was the immediate response from James.

'It's raining though,' Anna told them, the rain was still pouring down and didn't seem to be in any hurry to stop. All the males grinned at this.

'Perfect!' they chorused causing Anna to shake her head in despair.

'Just as long as you apply warming charms and water repellent spells on your and James' glasses. I'll be watching from the dry and warm.' Anna told her husband firmly, who immediately agreed and raced the two boys outside, summoning all their brooms. After realising how old Sirius' broom was, taking into account he was a Beater on the Quidditch team (James was a Chaser), the Potters had made sure to always buy him a broom along with James whenever the new type came out, and kept it in their house to make sure the Blacks couldn't damage it or take it away from Sirius and give it to Regulas, Sirius' younger brother.

Looking out of the window, wrapped up in a blanket she had taken from the end of her bed, Anna watched the men outside laughing and playing around with the snitch and Quaffle's, and laughing even harder as the rain only made the game more difficult, although she was sure there were no rules to whatever it was they were playing. She gave a satisfied sigh as she realised they would heal, and continue to heal; especially now they could heal together.

With times like these, just messing about and having fun in the air and rain, it was easy to forget the horrors of the past, but she knew when they did rear up once again, they could help them through it, together, as a family.

Maybe her sons would tell the other Marauders, as they liked to call themselves; but not yet, neither were ready, but in time they would have healed enough to trust their friends with their pasts, the violence they were subjected to, and let the Marauders heal them even more. But for now, her family were okay, they were alive and loved, and that was what matters the most she decided, as she gave a chuckle as her sons teamed up against her husband, cornering him into giving up the Quaffle he'd caught and chasing him around the large gardens. Enjoying themselves a s a family, a word Anna loved most.

The End