(Hey people, thanks for the great reviews, it means a lot this being my first fic and all!)

A softly knocking roused her, she quickly sat up. "Yes?"

"Can I come in?" a voice called, one she quickly noted wasn't Peter's but that to the Professor.

"Yes, Professor." Susan said standing up from her bed and smoothing out the creases of her dress. The door opened and she saw the Professor, now dressed in Narnia highest fashions still gripping his pipe in his mouth. "Good morning."

Noting Susan's look and smearing of eye make up, "You seem as though you are not having such a day, Susan?"

"I just fell asleep before changing that's all." she tried to smile, but saw he could see past her fake smiles. "Its nothing." she said halfway trying to convince herself too.

"Your mother confided your secret with me," he said bluntly which nearly knocked Susan down, she leaned against her bed and slowly slid down to the stone floor. She began to shutter, even tears could not escape her. Racing to her side, he got on his knees and brought her slumped body to his chest. "It is not all that bad, my dear. At least you now know, not that your parentage matters. You know who has raised you and loves you."

"I know all to well who loves me, Professor." she muttered. "How can I love my parents when I love their son?"

The Professor shocked at her words, lifted her up to see her face. "Susan what do you mean?"

"I mean just as I said," tears streamed down her face. Saying it aloud made it even worse, giving it life it seemed to cost her, her own. "What am I to do, Professor?"

Speechless, the Professor only looked to the poor child he held in his arms. Here before him sat a crying child, a confused young woman, and above all a little queen. Susan had always been the most levelheaded child he had ever met, and out of the four of them, the most logical one. Now, as he viewed her, he saw that her world had recently been turned upside down. Her parents were not her blood kin, and now that she had developed feelings for a boy she had called her brother her entire life.

"Every person will go through a troublesome time in their lives, Susan. Some are not so difficult to conquer, but those that are when they are defeated bring out a stronger person." he said majestically. "I wish I had some sort of answer to give you, at least you now know that your love is not in vain?"

"Not in vain? I am in love with a boy who I have called brother! Who I have looked up to my entire life, we share the same parents!" she raged pushing away from him. "My mother should have taken this to her grave, she has ruined my life!"

"Has she?" he asked, his eye brows raised. "If you would have never known, would you still not of had some sort of doubt? Has this never came up before, that you looked different from your siblings and parents?"

She stared at the Professor, it was true but at the moment she was fed up with the truth. "I am leaving."

"Leaving?"

"Narnia has no need for me, nor I Narnia."

Peter, roaming the halls of his castle, walked cold and hard hearted. He was confused and broken, an aging boy to a man, he felt the weight of every ounce of his heavy heart. He knew who he truly loved, he noted that he may be a young man but here in Narnia, the country gave him strength and an all knowing intelligence. In Narnia he felt the ultimate power, that here he reigned supreme and nothing could stop him...but now he felt little and defeated. How could this happen to him, to fall in love with something he could never have and last night committing a ugly sin and acting out upon his feelings, dragging the one he cared about down with him.

Hearing a familiar sound of hooves, he looked up to find a fawn, almost as pale as him. "Have you wandered these halls as well, my friend?" Peter heard Tumnus ask. "As have I ever since you left. I feared that I would never see her again, and now I realize that I never will."

"I have no advice to offer you, Tumnus." Peter mumbled as he stopped to lean against the sturdy walls of the castle. "I am in desperate need of them myself."

"Is there something wrong in Narnia?" Tumnus questioned out of pure habit of being at war his entire life.

"A battle I would gladly welcome other that what has happened." he said with his eyes closed.

"Your highness I do not follow you," Tumnus said coming closer to the boy king. "What's wrong?"

"If I tell you," his blue eyes flicked open, the edges of them red. "You must promise to not breathe it to anyone."

"Have I ever let you down before?" Tumnus tried to offer him a smile but Peter was so grave that Tumnus himself growing cold. "I swear to you, my lord."

"I am in love-."

The fawn smiled, "Is that all-"

"With Susan." The air between them dropped to freezing levels, Tumnus shocked backed away from Peter. He could not even begin to rationalize what he had just heard. The high king in love with his blood sister? Seeing the confused look on Tumnus's face, Peter sank to his knees and sobbed. He threw away his crown that began to slide down along with him, Tumnus stared at the broken king before him.

"What am I to do!" wailed Peter, his tears burned as the streamed down his face. His anger grew within him as he began to pound the marble stone work. Harder and harder he beat the floor, until he felt Tumnus's hand rest on his shoulder. Opening his eyes he saw streaks of crimson blood, looking at his hands he saw that he had busted his knuckles.

"Have you talked to her about this?" Tumnus said as calmly as he could, he bent down to Peter's level.

"I think she has an idea."

"Susan?" asked a tiny voice from her door. The Professor had long since gone at the orders of Susan. Lucy's eyes were wide as she watched Susan change back into her clothes they had arrived in. "What are you doing?"

"Nothing Lucy." she bluntly replied. She carefully lifted her crown off her head and placed it on her massive vanity table. She fingered the delicate golden crown, she adored her crown but even now it seemed meaningless to her. "I'm going home."

"Why?" she asked coming over to her sister and taking her hand in her own. "Why have you changed?"

Susan fought back the tears, gave her little sister a smile. "I just don't want to be here anymore, I want to grow up and stay that age, that's all."

"That's it?" she asked. "Nothing more?"

"Nothing more." she said, then getting to Lucy's level she hugged her. "But don't tell Peter until I have left, okay?"

Lucy, confused as ever, shook her head and watched her leave the room. Out of pure not understanding, Lucy began to cry softly. Susan not far from her room could hear Lucy's tears, shedding her own she pushed herself to not return to her sister but to flee the castle and Narnia, but most of all Peter.

How could she even begin to think of a way to cope with what was happening to her? She never find an easy way to explain to Lucy and Edmund how she wasn't their real sister and how she felt about Peter. It was hard enough coming to terms with it herself, avoiding the topic herself she couldn't ever say it in her head without tears fighting their way out. She wasn't even sure what her plans were once returning to their world. She could easily run away from the Professor's house with him trapped in Narnia as well. It was useless of her to return to her mother, to that life which now refused her, she would some how make it on her own. It would easy to get some sort of job, just as long as she way away. The temptation was too great and too shameful.

Pushing against the massive doors to the castle, she dropped a hood over her head, shielding herself from prying eyes she crept into the forest which once she had played in free and happy, now they offered protection and a place to hide. The leaves crunched under her weight, sweat began to bead on her face and neck as she fought her way threw the underbrush. Picking and clawing at her she soon realized someone was watching her. Old habits possessed her as she quickly whipped her right arm back to get her bow and her left hand to retrieve an arrow, she remember they were left back at the castle.

"Who is there!" she called out as the she felt the vines wrap closer about her.

Even some of the trees are on her side entered Susan thoughts. No, she couldn't be back.

"Oh but I am, Susan."

((yea, I'm working on the next installment!))