Mikau: Hey everyone! Great to have you back for the second installment. Thanks so much for returning to read. Thanks as well to Aniki-xvi and Syrus07 who reviewed! This chapter shows the events of last chapter from Kaito's point of view. Oddly enough, even though they're two sides of the same story, the chapters have very little dialogue in common. Kaito also mentions events that Hakuba leaves out of his account, such as what happened after they got home from the airport and certain conversations. Anyway, Kaito's a little loony this chapter, just to forewarn you. I hope you enjoy it!

Disclaimer: If I owned it, the characters would have more of a family presence. Has anyone else noticed that the majority of the characters are only children with parents that are largely MIA? Shinichi, Ran, Heiji, Kazuha, Kaito, and Saguru are all only children. With the exception of the Osakan duo, the rest of the characters are missing at least one, but more commonly both of their parents. I think Sonoko is the only one with a sibling and two parents. Why I wonder?

Kuroba Kaito Part One

Kuroba Kaito had been feeling…off. Yes, "off" was a good word to describe it.

He was bored, the intense desire to do something—anything!—gnawing at him constantly like a mosquito bite in the center of his back. Only, Kaito was quite flexible and could easily reach the center of his back if he had to scratch, but… He felt listless and drained as well.

The normally active, cheerful teen wanted to do everything and nothing all at the same time, and as the days rolled by, the warring impulses got stronger and stronger until he considered consulting a psychiatrist about the possibility of bipolar disorder.

The mood swings were debilitating, and his classmates were beginning to notice. Something had to be done. Things couldn't continue this way.

But Kaito was absolutely clueless as to the origin of his strange malaise, and that left him with nowhere to start, no diagnosis, no prognosis, and no treatment plan.

Aoko was the first to propose an illness: Lovesickness.

"Kaito, are you having a fight with your girlfriend?" the nosey girl asked in that annoyingly high, false voice she used when she wanted to pester him. "You've been sulking lately, you know."

"I haven't been sulking," he huffed, turning to look out the window. "And I don't have a girlfriend," he added, but only inside the confines of his own mind.

"Yes you have. You've been sulking since the school year started," Aoko snorted, puffing out her cheeks like a little girl. "Aoko knows when Kaito's sulking, and Aoko wants to know what's wrong!"

The magician simply sighed. "I don't even know, so it's a waste of time to ask."

He stood with another heartfelt sigh and tossed, "I'm going home early," over his shoulder as he left.

There was a pop, and he disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

000

The rest of the day was spent wandering.

He stopped by a few arcades, killed an hour or two reading manga at the Akihabara Book Off, and finally made his way to Ueno Park. He watched some street performers for a half an hour, dropped by the Benzaiten shrine, and decided to visit the zoo on a whim.

He hated zoos—absolutely loathed them. When he was little, he had enjoyed watching the pandas eat and the tigers pace, but now that he was old enough to understand, zoos had become the same as prisons to him. The panda ate because there was nothing else worth doing. The tiger paced because it was bored out of its skull.

Kaito stared at the jaguar for a very long time as it walked back and forth, tracing the exact same path time and time again. He thought, "That'll be me some day, if I'm not careful. They'll put me in a little cage where I can't run, can't fly, and they'll all watch me as I pace, slowly slipping into madness day by day. Best to be careful, then."

The monkeys and the seals were the zoo's salvation. The simians looked to be having a grand time—climbing, swinging, yowling at each other. The seals gracefully sailed through the water in the much-too-small tank, doing turns and then breaking the surface with a pop.

The elephant was the saddest. There was only one.

"Herd animals shouldn't be alone like that. They should be with their families," the orphan muttered under his breath, trying not to think of the empty house that was waiting for him.

Mom was off on a trip, like always.

He was about to leave when a pair of golden eyes caught and held his gaze. They were beautiful, glimmering in the twilight, and they seemed to look right through him. It was as if they could see everything.

Kaito hadn't felt that way since February when another magnificent, golden-eyed creature had blatantly stared at him.

It was a little eerie how this caged hawk at the zoo and Hakuba Saguru had the same gaze in addition to a similar shade of eye color.

Kaito blinked and turned to leave.

Hakuba Saguru.

It had been a long time since he'd thought about the absent detective. Come to think of it, the restless-listlessness had started shortly after the blonde had left for England, using "family matters" as an excuse.

Kaito knew that the Brit had left because of him…his alter ego, rather. He could tell that the other teen had gotten tired of losing their little game of cat and mouse—it had taken a huge toll on the blonde's inflated ego and haughty attitude.

It was then that Kaito realized it: he missed the uptight twit. Not really in an emotional, touchy-feely, friends type way, but he missed the detective. More than anything he wanted Hakuba to come back and chase him. THAT was what had been missing from his life, making him feel off.

He was off because he lacked an adequate opponent. While Nakamori-keibu was great and everything, he kept falling for the Kid dummies while the real kaitou slipped away unnoticed. The taskforce couldn't crack intricate riddles, so Kaito had been forced to go back to date-time-place-target heist notes. Kudo Shinichi (or whatever it was he was calling himself these days) was a worthy playmate, but he seemed too busy with his never-ending supply of horrendous murders to join in the fun, unless expressly invited. In short, without Hakuba to chase him and push his mind to its limits, Kaito was about as good as the caged tiger.

Thoughts of his missing rival filled the young thief's head for several days after that until one day during lunch break, Kaito pulled out his mobile and searched his phonebook for the blonde's number. Hopefully Hakuba was still using the one Kaito had saved when the Brit had called from France.

Kaito paused and stared at the screen.

What was he doing? The detective and thief weren't exactly friends. It wasn't as if the brunette could simply call the other boy up for a conversation for old times' sake. He had no reason to call the detective.

A text would be more appropriate, but what would he say? "Hey! How have you been? I know we haven't ever talked before, but I miss you. It's really affecting my ability to function, so please come back home and chase me to relieve some of my boredom, okay?" Yes, that would go over so terribly well.

He sighed deeply.

What the hell was he doing? He should take up a hobby like…sky diving or something to get his mind off of things and get the adrenalin pumping.

He sighed again and looked down at the screen.

"It was really weird. I was out on a walk today, and I saw this random hawk. It made me think of you. Strange, right?" he typed.

Well, truth be told, he edited it several times before actually sending it, but…it seemed appropriately random to be considered normal for the type of person he made other people think that he was.

Days passed, but no reply came.

At first, every time he got a text, he hurriedly dug out his phone with unbridled excitement. A week passed, and Kaito lost his enthusiasm. After two weeks, he gave up hope and tried to solve his problems through more conventional methods. Sky diving was a little out of the question, so he took to rock climbing.

It was about a month after he'd first sent the text to Hakuba when Kaito received his second sign.

This one came in the form of a magazine article about the blonde in question that Kaito had stumbled upon in the library. He'd accidentally bumped it off the shelf, and it fell open to a full-page image of the Englishman. Kaito made a copy and took it home for no logical reason that he could provide, and then he spent the better part of an hour skimming the article, reading the interview, and looking at the pictures.

Hakuba had been such an aggravating, self-absorbed prick when he'd first arrived in Japan to chase Kid, but he'd slowly lightened up, becoming slightly less unbearable over the course of his time in Tokyo.

Kaito sighed as he looked at a more recent picture of the Holmes freak wearing a nice suit with a tacky tie. He regretted not getting to know the blonde while he'd had the chance. From what he had gleaned from Hakuba's words in the interview, the Brit was actually a pretty interesting person. Kaito liked the way he thought, and he felt remorseful for never fully taking advantage of the intellectual rival with which he'd been gifted.

It was the same with Kudo.

Kaito'd been given two competent adversaries, but he hadn't had the chance to truly enjoy either before they'd gone and disappeared/shrunk on him.

He used Aoko taking the mop to him as an excuse to text the blonde again the following day. Unfortunately, his efforts were in vain; he never received a response.

000

While awaiting a reply that would never come, Kaito stumbled across a startling revelation: Hakuba's smirk was rather fetching.

Of course, those are my words, not his. What Kaito actually thought was, "That son of a gun doesn't look half bad wearing that cocky grin when it's not pointed at me…Kid…whatever."

And then he blinked and wondered if he could use the "hormonal, teenage boy excuse" to wave away his brief spark of attraction to the detective. After all, he'd been turned on by inanimate objects before; it didn't take a lot to get him excited, and this attraction to Hakuba was probably normal or some kind of phase he'd grow out of once the testosterone leveled off. He repetitively assured himself that one little incident of tight pants didn't make him gay because there was no way he was gay for that insufferable git.

However, after the fourth time, Kaito began to wonder.

Alright, he thought, so Hakuba's attractive. That doesn't mean I like him, like him. I mean, he's a cocky jerk…at least he seems like a cocky jerk…then again, so do I, but I'm not really like that…. Maybe he's not really like that either. But still…I don't know. For now, I guess he's got a nice face.

Thoughts of Hakuba's nice face slowly evolved into thoughts of Hakuba's nice body as the days went by, and this presented the teen with a huge problem: was he gay or just stressed out?

To determine the answer, he ended up making one of the five greatest mistakes of his life: he nonchalantly asked his childhood friend if she'd be interested in experimenting with him.

At first, Aoko looked confused. Confusion turned into shock as she slowly understood his meaning, and shock became anger as she got out the mop and proceeded to beat the living daylights out of him for insulting her by even suggesting such a thing.

She avoided him for a long time after that.

After having his heart ripped out and stomped on, he asked other girls but was similarly rejected (although a good deal less violently). He even considered asking a guy or two because he figured that that would be more definitive proof of his sexual orientation. Just because he could make out with girls, didn't necessarily mean that he didn't like boys too. However, if he kissed a guy and didn't mind it, he would know for sure if he was gay or temporarily insane.

Unfortunately, he lacked the nerve to proposition any one of the guys. He was already known as a pervert among the ladies, so asking them to fool around did nothing to tarnish his reputation. However, if it got out that he'd asked a guy, he'd instantly be labeled a homo.

He was lying awake, contemplating these things on the night he sent his third text to the detective: "Akako-chan misses you. She was talking the other day about how you had always been fun to freak out. You've been gone for almost six months now. When are you coming home?"

It was just a lie he had constructed to fish for information and offer an excuse to talk to the Brit again.

He figured that he'd know for sure once he talked to Hakuba, the bastard who had made him doubt himself in the first place.

000

"I'm pretty sure it's just stress," Kaito sighed a few days later at the Blue Parrot while lining up his shot.

"Bocchama, don't you have school?" Jii inquired, frowning at his young charge.

"I'm ditching." The thief missed by a long shot and shrugged. "Anyway, it's probably just stress."

"What is?" Jii rolled his eyes and silently apologized to his fallen master for being unable to stop his son from becoming a delinquent.

"You know that Hakuba Saguru guy that used to chase me?" the brunette asked off-handedly as he picked out his next target.

"I remember," Jii sighed heavily. "Frankly, Young Master, I must say that I'm glad that we're rid of him. He's come dangerously close to catching you several times."

"I miss him," the thief sighed dreamily. "I miss the adrenaline high he gave me…and the mental gymnastics he made me do were fun…. Plus, I just noticed recently, but…he's kind of hott."

Jii nearly choked on the coffee he had just sipped. "Bocchama, are you trying to give me a heart attack?"

"No." Kaito shrugged and went to fetch some napkins to clean up the mess. "It's just…you know how when you see someone a lot, you stop really seeing them? When I used to see Hakuba every day, all I noticed was how annoying and nosey he was—a real thorn in my side. Now that he's gone, I can kind of see him more clearly. I mean, I've been doing some poking around on his fan sites, and they have some pictures and interviews and profile information, and…he's pretty…for a guy, you know?"

All Jii could do was blink and think, Dear Toichi-sama in heaven, what would you have me do?

"He's actually a really interesting guy. He had a blog a few years ago when he was in England, so I was reading that, and I just can't help but want to know more about him. I think he's like me; who he pretends to be in public isn't who he really is. It could just be stress or mental illness or something, but…I think maybe I like him, and I think he might like me too…or at least Kid, but I am Kid, and he knows that, so…I mean, the way he talks about me is just…it's a mix of annoyance and respect. He says I'm a genius, you know? In one of his interviews, he talks about what a great rival I am for him, and you can really tell that he admires me. He told everyone that I'm a good person…that I'm honest, and…why are you looking at me like that? I know it's a little sudden, but…do I sound like a nut or something?"

"Bocchama, why don't we sit down and talk about this," Jii suggested, feeling like he could fall over at any moment.

"'Kay," the teen easily agreed.

"Young Master, maybe you should take up a hobby. You're obviously bored, and it seems to be affecting your…um…mental stability." The accomplice tried his hardest to state it tactfully.

"I've already tried rock climbing, fencing, basketball, karate, and track and field," Kaito sighed, leaning back into the lounge chair. "Nothing really seems to do it for me. I really want Hakuba to come back and chase me."

"How about that young boy? The grade schooler," Jii clarified. "Why don't you send him an invitation to your next heist? Maybe after you've had a proper challenge you'll realize how silly you're acting."

Kaito pursed his lips and considered. "I guess that could work. You think I'll feel better after taking on Tantei-kun and forget my feelings for Hakuba?"

The old man grimaced. "Young Master, I believe that you believe that you have feelings for the young detective, but I think you may be constructing those feelings to compensate for the lack of action in your life in the detective's absence. However, you are free to think and act as you wish. I will not stop you, but I ask that you do not behave rashly."

The magician nodded. "So…I'll schedule a heist with Tantei-kun and see if my feelings go away afterwards?"

"That is my recommendation." Jii nodded solemnly.

000

Kid sent a challenge directly to the Mouri Detective Agency and faced off with the shrunken detective the following day, but while his feelings of utter boredom dissipated for the duration of the heist, the loneliness and restless-listlessness stayed. He still missed his half-British rival, and he still thought that the other teen looked handsome whenever he gazed at the pictures on the fan sites.

That settled it. Kuroba Kaito most probably had a thing for Hakuba Saguru.

000

"So what should I do about it?" Kaito sighed, hitting send on his text-of-the-day to the European sleuth.

"Bocchama, if you could please refrain from sitting on the pool tables," Jii sighed bitterly, silently begging, "Toichi-sama, give me patience with this child."

"Jii-chan, this is important," the child in question whined, hopping down from his perch. "I'm in love with this guy!"

"Young Master, you are certainly not in love," the older gentleman snapped. "You merely wish to be. You're lonely and you don't connect well with people. You feel that no one understands you, so you've created this fictitious image of Hakuba-kun to identify with. You've always had a splendid imagination, Bocchama, and I don't want to damage it, but this must stop. Falling in love with an ideal and obsessing over it is unhealthy."

"But he really is like me, Jii-chan," Kaito replied softly. "He understands me."

"You haven't spoken to him in months, and even when he was here, the two of you were not friends, Bocchama. Whatever connection you think you have, it's only an invention of your own mind. You need to snap out of it; I'm worried about you, Young Master Kaito."

Kaito looked away. It hurt to see his most trusted confidant gazing at him with such pain in his eyes.

"I'd rather hold onto the lie than give it up and have nothing," he finally responded. "I really do think that he likes me too. You'll see when he texts me back."

"Bocchama, how many texts have you sent that boy?" Jii sighed, shaking his head slowly at his charge.

"'Bout a dozen." Kaito shrugged.

"And how many times has he responded?" the elderly man continued.

"He's busy," the thief retorted defensively. "He's got lots of important cases that he's working on, and he doesn't always have time to text back, but he reads my texts. Even though most of them are nonsense, he always reads them and smiles because he knows I'm thinking about him. He doesn't have to respond for me to know that he's thinking of me too."

"Bocchama, have you considered the possibility that you're only pestering the good detective?" Jii proposed softly, knowing that he wasn't going to receive a positive response.

"I'm not bothering him!" Kaito snapped. "He likes hearing from me! I'm not a nuisance; it's only natural that friends text each other."

"B-But you're not friends, Bocchama," Jii argued tentatively, unsettled by the quick change in his charge's demeanor. Kaito was acting strange—alarmingly so.

"Yes we are!" the teen retorted like a spoiled child. "We text all the time. We may not be close now, but when he's a little less busy and has time to reply…you'll see. We'll get closer when he has more time. We have to; I mean, we're the same. He understands what it's like…"

"What what's like, Young Master?" Jii whispered.

"What it's like to be alone all the time," Kaito sighed, heading for the door.

000

He ditched school the next day too because he was tired of putting on his poker face every morning. He was tired of pasting on that grin, going to school, and putting on that act. He was tired of pretending that things were okay.

They weren't.

They hadn't been for a very, very long time—since his father had died, really—and he'd had enough of the charade. He'd grown weary of playing the role of Kuroba Kaito, class clown and pervert. He was sick of fooling everyone—even himself at times.

However, there was Hakuba who saw right through him, knew his true self well enough to anticipate his every move. Hakuba would be his salvation from his monotonous, everyday life. Hakuba would take him away from all of the people who made him feel so utterly alone.

That's what he thought as he stopped on the bridge on his way home that day and typed out his daily text.

"What are you up to?"

He imagined the detective smiling and rolling his beautiful golden eyes when he received the message.

He'd probably be working on a case or something, wearing those reading glasses that had looked so cute in the pictures he'd found online.

That's how Kaito always imagined it.

It was just like their interactions at school. Kaito would pester and bother and pester some more, and Hakuba would ignore, ignore, ignore. He'd roll his eyes, smirk, or snort when appropriate, but he'd never respond directly—that would mean he had lost by giving into the pesky imp.

Kaito thought of the texts as the same thing. Hakuba was probably smirking and flirtatiously ignoring Kaito's text right that very moment.

And then Kaito's phone vibrated.

The magician blinked and was still a minute before it donned upon him: Hakuba had finally responded.

Fireworks seemed to go off in celebration.

His heart had exploded in pure, unadulterated joy.

Now they could finally talk to one another. Now they could really get to know each other and really fall in love. He didn't have to be alone anymore because Hakuba had finally taken the hand he'd stretched out. They could take solace in each other and escape the world that didn't understand them.

Kaito quickly fished his phone out of his pocket and eagerly gazed at the display.

He blinked.

"SLEEPING! Whathe blooody hell do you thnk Im doing? Its for in the sodding morning! Leave me the hell ALONE!"

It was in English.

No matter, he could do English…sort of.

He managed to read it once after a few minutes spent puzzling out words and meaning. There had been mistakes that had made it hard for a non-native speaker to read, and British slang was not his forte.

He blinked and read it again. And then a third time just to make sure.

"Oh," was all he could say once he'd finished. He typed back a quick "Sorry," and turned off his phone.

He'd been wrong about everything.

Jii-chan had been right; Kaito was delusional.

He'd had this glorified image of Hakuba generated from magazine articles, fan sites, and even his own depraved desires. He'd felt alone and helpless, so he'd created a savior for himself. He'd imagined someone who understood him, who could empathize like no one else could, but that person apparently didn't exist. He'd made it all up.

While there had been evidence to support his phantasies, it had turned out that just because Hakuba could anticipate Kid, didn't mean that he understood the inner workings of Kaito's heart and mind. Just because they were both outcasts, didn't mean that they could commiserate and carry the burden of being misfits together. Just because Hakuba had praised Kid in his interviews, didn't mean that Hakuba liked Kaito back.

Kaito had been rejected, and it stung.

He went back to his empty house, got into bed, and refused to get up for a week.

At that point, his mother came home, found him passed out, and got him to the hospital where he was treated for dehydration.

Once released, he was scolded severely for his recent truancy and total disregard for his health.

Chikage decided to stay home and look after her self-destructing son after that.

So it was back to putting on the poker face along with his school uniform every morning and not taking it off until he was safe in the confines of his room at night.

Two things had helped during this time: one, Aoko had stopped acting as if he had kicked her puppy, and two, he had read Hakuba's apology text.

He hadn't received it until he'd left the hospital, so he'd been dwelling on the overwhelming rejection for a good two weeks already, but reading the sincere apology helped restore the kind, loving image of Hakuba that the magician had created.

He thought long and hard about his next move concerning his crush as he attempted to get his life back on track (superficially at least. Back to the way things were when no one could tell anything was wrong but he was still screaming on the inside). Kaito decided to play it safe from that point on. He'd play it logically, like a game of chess.

A month after he'd gotten that horrible first reply from the detective, Kaito summoned all of the courage and texted the blonde again. He'd stayed up late, texting at midnight so that Hakuba would receive the message sometime around when school let out. He kept things business, impersonal—he asked if they heard much about Kid in England.

Kaito set down his phone with a sigh and prayed that he didn't get yelled at for disrupting class or dinner or something.

His phone vibrated a minute later, and he was both thrilled and terrified to look at the read out.

He gulped and cautiously looked at the phone. Never before in his life had he been so happy to see the word "sometimes."

000

Hakuba was a little slow to warm up, but eventually Kaito got him talking. They discussed Kid and the taskforce at first, talking about safe topics until Kaito felt comfortable enough to begin conversations on everyday life and the nonsense he preferred to chat about.

He made sure to only text every couple days in the beginning because he wasn't some kind of freaky stalker…not anymore, anyway. He'd actually come to understand the blonde a little better, and while he now knew that the detective wasn't his messiah, he'd learned that Hakuba really did have Prince Charming potential. The other teen was very interesting, and the two were quite similar after all.

Conversations with the Brit got more and more frequent, and Kaito found himself walking around with a little bounce in his step.

Other people noticed the genuine improvement in the magician's mood as well.

"Got yourself a girlfriend, Kuroba?" one of his classmates asked, elbowing him in the ribs.

"Nah," Kaito would laugh in response, going back to whistling.

"You met someone?" Aoko asked tentatively during chemistry one day.

"I met someone," Kaito confirmed with a grin.

The inspector's daughter nodded and spared him a melancholy little smile. "Aoko's happy for you. This girl seems to be doing you a lot of good. You've been really down all year, but now…"

"It's amazing what a difference having hope can make. Having just one friend that gets you when the rest of the world doesn't is—"

"—We're in the middle of class now, Kuroba-kun, Nakamori-san," Asou-sensei scolded lightly, just like he did every class.

Jii-chan noticed the change in his young master's disposition as well.

Honestly, Kaito had been off his rocker for months before, consumed with more than the normal quota of teen angst. The boy had been talking about no one understanding and no one caring to the point where it had even made Jii himself depressed.

But, to be fair, Kaito was right.

There wasn't anyone who understood what the child was going through. There was no one to talk to, no one to comfort him. Kaito couldn't let others get close for their own safety and for the sake of Kaito's freedom as well. The teen really was all alone.

It also didn't help that his father was dead, his mother was AWOL, the girl he loved (?) hated his alter ego, and the only true friend the young thief had to confide in was an old, washed-up stagehand. Things were tough for the poor kid.

So it had only seemed natural—unfortunate and bizarre, but perfectly natural—when Kaito had invented a surrogate friendship/romantic relationship with that crazy, foreign detective. The young master was an escapist like his father, after all.

Things had been dangerously unhealthy for a while, but after Kaito had been released from the hospital, he'd drastically improved.

"So…I'm in love with Hakuba Saguru," Kaito had announced that fall.

Jii blinked. "Bocchama, kindly come down from the pool table. They really aren't meant to be used as chairs."

"I mean for real this time," the magician sighed, sliding off the table. "We've been texting—actually talking, having conversations this time…some of them were pretty long, actually—and I'm getting to know him better, and I think I really like him…for real."

The assistant sighed, scratching the back of his head.

"Say something, Jii-chan," Kaito urged, and instead of the pouty face he was expecting, Jii received a very concerned, nervous look from his charge.

"Why are you telling me this?" The old man sighed again.

"Because…I trust you," the boy mumbled. "I respect your opinion, and I'm worried about what you think of me. Besides, there's no one else I can talk to, so…"

Jii nodded and placed a hand lovingly on Kaito's shoulder. "Bocchama, don't worry about what others think. Just do what makes you happy. I only want for you to be happy."

"Thanks, Jii-chan," Kaito chuckled, a small smile upon his lips.

It had been a long time since Jii had seen the boy smile like that.

"Toichi-sama, does it really matter as long as he's happy?" he thought.

….

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Mikau: It's an ice cream cone! Maybe…if the formatting worked better, anyway. So…yes. That's the mentally unstable Kaito chapter. Next chapter (the final chapter, unless I get requests for omakes) is the development of the romance…and Kaito being a hormonal, teenage pervert. Look forward to it! Thank you for reading. If you have the time, constructive criticism, praise, and comments are appreciated. Hope to see you next time!