I spaced the lines out properly in this chapter; I'll go back and redo one soon.
Chapter 2
Shinji opens his eyes and sees a strange in white hooded robes standing over him
?: Good morning
Shinji: AAAAAHHHH!
The sound of Shinji's rather girlish scream wakes the rest of the campsite who quickly run to his position. Domon grabs the stranger and throws him to the ground.
Domon: who the hell are you? And what the hell do you think you're doing?
: My apologies, I did not mean to startle you.
Shinji: could've fooled me...
: My name is somewhat difficult to pronounce so for now call me Seraph
Simon: How cliché. What are you doing here?
Seraph: Well you see I was the one who summoned you here.
A mixture of responses come from the assembled pilots, mainly what's, why's and a muttered death threat.
Seraph: (clears throat) indeed. You see I require your help. I represent the light of this world; basically I'm the closest thing this world has to a god.
Setsuna: There is no god.
Seraph: your beliefs are your own. Anyway my problem is that my counterpart has recently had a worrying rise in power, thus unbalancing the scales, so to speak. Since I am prohibited from gaining power myself I cannot face him directly. You however, can. You may notice that your mounts have been fully repaired. It is my intent that you use these machines and your unique skills of piloting to bring him back under control.
Shinji: what if we refuse?
Seraph: then you will be sent back to your own world. In your case there won't be much to go back to after third impacts over and done with.
Shinji: What?
Seraph: unfortunately you and ask where the only ones left after impact. However if you help me I can alter what will be. That goes for the rest of you too. I can undo the damage caused in your worlds to an extent.
Shinji: But why can't you do it anyway?
Seraph: as my counterparts power grows my own becomes more limited. Bringing you and your mounts here was the limit of my abilities.
Domon: Can you stop calling them mounts already, it just sounds wrong.
Seraph: Fine then, how about mecha? It's a fairly universal term I believe.
The pilots agree with varying degrees of enthusiasm.
Kamina: Consider the great Kamina at your service then.
Simon: I'm in too.
Renton: let's do it.
Eureka: yes
Setsuna: Mission accepted
Domon: yeah
Shinji: Are you all insane? (The rest glare at him) ok ok I'm in.
Seraph: My eternal thanks to all of you. Now then let's BOOM
a series of explosions cut off seraphs words. The assembled pilots turn to spot five mecha sized creatures. Each has heavy mechanical augmentation, four spiders like legs and a back mounted cannon.
Domon: ... What the FUCK?
Seraph: that is our enemy. I would advise to Prepare for combat.
The pilots rapidly mount up and charge to meet the oncoming threat.
Simon: Alright guys split up and take one each
Others: Roger
The pilots rush towards their chosen opponents
-
The Nirvash spec 2 surfs towards its opponent, which spits a barrage of shots from its back mounted cannon, the Nirvash changes into its jet form and evades the shots. Changing back it hurls a boomerang knife at the creature as it flies past.
Renton: Ha! Take that sucker
The boomerang knife cuts a long gash into the carapace of the creature before returning to the Nirvash's hand. However this only seems to piss it off as it snaps at the Nirvash with oversized claws. The Nirvash veers away
Renton: whoa!
Eureka: Renton, allow me to deal with this.
Renton: Ok, go for it!
A keyboard folds out in front of Eureka who begins rapidly inputting commands.
Eureka: Firing solution complete, homing lasers fire!
A veritable web of light springs from the shoulder panels of the Nirvash, homing in on the creature below and practically obliterating the main body.
Renton: Wait, we had those?
Eureka: Yes, always
Renton: well it seems we got it anyway...
Burning Gundam dashes towards its opponent, dodging the barrage of shots and leaping into the air before kicking the creature in the face.
Domon: WELL HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT HUH?
The burning Gundam draws its beam sabers and begins hacking at the top carapace of the creature.
Domon: dammit I'm not getting through! I need to find a weak point! Wait I know, underneath.
The burning Gundam leaps from the creature's back, landing in front of it then kicking it under what would be its chin with enough force to flip it onto its back.
Domon: Here I go! This hand of mine is burning red! Its bright cry tells me to grasp victory!
The gantlet of burning Gundam right arm slides into place and its right hand begins to glow as the fins on the back open up.
Domon: ERUPTING, BURNING, FINGEEEER!
The burning Gundam plunges its hand into the creature's abdomen.
Domon: and now... HEAT END!
The creature convulses as it roasts from the inside out.
The Gurren charges towards the giant crab shots pinging from its armour, lagann hot on its heels.
Simon: Bro, let's combine!
Kamina: Yeah!
The lagann leaps into the air, transforming into the head and crashing into the top of Gurren, the limbs of which extend. The helmet flips out to cover the head of Gurren lagann.
Both: Reborn conflagration of manliness, GURREN LAGANN!
The Gurren lagann comes crashing down on top of the creature, twin drills extending from each wrist and plunging into its opponents back.
Kamina: Take this! The reborn fire of my SOUL!
Simon: Bro let's end this quick!
Kamina: Simon I like the way you think. Let's go!
The Gurren lagann leaps from the back of the oversized crustacean and hurls it's sunglasses at it, pinning it.
Both: FINISHING MOVE!
Drills extend from multiple points along the Gurren lagann's body.
Both: GIGA
The drills retract, forming one long drill over the Gurren lagann's up-stretched hand.
Both: DRILL
The drill expands until it is larger than the mecha itself
Both: BBRREEAAKKEERR!
The Gurren lagann flies forward, drill first and bores a hole straight through the creature, which then explodes for no apparent reason.
Simon: We did it!
The Exia zigzags through the incoming fire, manoeuvring round and cutting through one of the creature's legs.
Setsuna: This is Setsuna F. Seiei, eliminating the target!
Exia dashes in a circle around the monster, rapidly cutting off all three remaining legs. The monster collapses to the ground
Setsuna: Target immobilized, proceeding to eliminate.
The Exia plunges its GN sword into the creatures face.
Setsuna: there is nothing my blade cannot cut.
Eva unit 01 is lying on its back, pinned by its opponent.
Shinji: how the hell did I get in this mess? Oh god oh god, I'm gonna die!
Unit one engages it's AT field, knocking the giant crab off, and gets to its feet.
Shinji: why can't I be left alone huh? Why must everything cause me pain?
Unit one draws its prog knife and charges towards the creature which, despite being a 30m tall giant crab, manages to look positively terrified.
Shinji: RRRAAAGGGH!
Unit 01 leaps onto the creatures back, punching, kicking and stabbing.
Shinji: Take this, and this and this!
Eventually the creature stops squirming and Unit 01 stands upright
Shinji: yes! I did it!
Shinji suddenly notices the other pilots (still inside their respective mecha), all having long since finished their own battles, staring at him.
Domon: Yeeaah... I think your techniques gonna need a little work.
