A/N: Unf thanks to the lovelies who read and reviewed and favourited and followed and sobs you know who you are.
Warning: Little smut? Foul language?
Disclaimer: I actually have a Sasuke action figure, so technically, Sasuke belongs to me. The Naruto series? Not so much.
"So, Uchiha. As much as I'd like to believe 'Because I said so,' is a plausible reason, it is not. And it's only protocol that I get your honest thoughts and suspicions out into the open before we can plunge any further."
Sasuke crossed his arms in defiance as he leaned back against the doorframe coolly and glared back at the blonde seated behind the office desk.
"Now, can I just get your bloody approval on my outfit of the day so we can get this investigation business started?"
Receiving no reply of sorts, Naruto heaved a breath and repeated the seemingly mind boggling question that has been postponing his dire need to get out into the open and collect dirt on people for the past 10 minutes.
"I repeat, why can't I start stalking your wife dressed like this?"
x
Naruto looked like a total hooker.
A tan Adonis in a fitting black tank top that clung onto his very chest like a second skin, defining every little line, dent and bump carved onto the perfectly sculpted body of his. A pair of low rising jeans hung low on his hips, threatening to fall any moment. – At least, that's what his mind kept envisioning. – The piece of denim was stretched taut against his firm behind, sure to receive many looks from any sane person living and breathing, and they were tight against his legs, bloody skinny jeans, wrapped snuggly against Naruto's muscled limbs.
"Because I said so." Sasuke answered once more, frustrated with how their conversation was going nowhere. Why can't the stupid blonde read his mind like how he read his facial features the night prior?
Perhaps if he developed mind reading powers, this whole problem would have been solved ten minutes ago. He would have known to put on a big, thick, ugly jacket and change into a pair of baggy jeans instead. And maybe Sasuke could make him look even more unattractive by throwing a few eggs at his hard upper body, making him look, and even smell, revolting.
"You're not afraid that your wife would fall for me and ditch you for real, would you?" Naruto tried a little joke to ease the tension in the air, though his voice held some level of seriousness.
The only thing he's afraid of is if Naruto -his detective, not some skanky slut- went out like that, Sakura might fall for him, and it would deter their investigation rate.
"Hn." Sasuke casted a defeated look at the blonde, coming to the conclusion that Naruto would not be receiving any mind powers any time soon. "Put on a jacket." He finally said.
From the corner of his eye, he noticed the blonde slapped a palm over his forehead dramatically. "That's it? Geez, Sasuke, why didn't you just say so!" Naruto propelled himself out of his seat and walked up towards a makeshift cupboard, which is basically a cardboard box with a couple of folded clothes tucked within. He dug through it a little and yanked out a leather jacket.
Perfect. Now he looks like a hot biker. Sasuke groaned.
x
"Now that we're all in agreement of what I'm wearing, why don't we officially start our discussion?" Naruto asked in mock cheerfulness.
"Hn." Came Sasuke's expected clipped reply.
"So, as much as I trust in your judgement," Naruto said with an edge of sarcasm, "what makes you think your wife is cheating on you?"
"This." Sasuke pulled his right shoulder forward, the bag slinging on it swinging towards the same direction. He unzipped it deftly and pulled out three burned CDs, all neatly inserted into a clear plastic case with only a date scribbled on the surface.
On instinct, Naruto picked up the top one and took it off his case, inserting it into the disc drive on his CPU, waiting as his computer picked up on it.
Sasuke didn't know how he feels about Naruto watching those discs. Even he felt slightly disturbed by it, and he should be affected the most, seeing as it was his wife starring. But the blonde was a professional detective, as unbelievable as it is, and he wouldn't be perturbed by events such as these. They would seem insignificant compared to other bigger cases he'd probably been on.
A box popped up on his desktop, concerning the disc he'd inserted. Naruto ran his mouse towards 'Play Video' and waited a couple more seconds as the software booted up and his disc info was transferred to it.
With an approving nod from Sasuke, Naruto tapped on his spacebar to play the video. The black screen quickly warped into a room with dim lighting, where a female was bent over a surface, her pink hair splayed across the back of her head as her body rocked forward with every thrust sent her way by the appendage stuck into her entrance, the unidentifiable figure propped behind her repeatedly ramming into her body.
Sasuke pointedly ignored the moans and mewls emitted from Naruto's speakers. Whether from pain or pleasure, he was unsure. Ten seconds to the video, the screen went black again, signalling the end of the short clip.
"Your wife?" Naruto asked with a blank face, head spinning with steps he'd planned on taking, laid out nicely on a red carpet.
"Hn," Sasuke curled his pointer finger and tapped against the hard cover of the other two discs, "I've received three of them."
Naruto glanced at the dates written on the shiny surfaces. The latest one was sent only two days ago.
"Are you sure those aren't just homemade videos from you?" He asked with a cheeky grin.
"I'm sure you noticed that I look better." Sasuke pointed out with a glare.
"How modest, Uchiha." Naruto quickly ejected the disc and slid it back to its case. "Alright, I'll go check out your wife and get back to you later."
Sasuke's stomach coil in undeterminable fury as Naruto's choice of words affected him on some psychological level.
"I'll be by your office in a little bit." Informed Naruto as he led them both to his door, Sasuke's bag zipped and slung once more over his shoulder while Naruto lingered behind, closing the door after Sasuke's departure.
He played oblivious to the questioning stare tossed his way before the door closed entirely. With a mental to-do list already set up, Naruto set about searching his office for a couple of devices and machineries he would need for the day.
x
Out in the open park, Naruto waited patiently on a bench, looking as inconspicuous as possible as he idly flicked through a magazine, eyes darting towards the café up ahead whenever he saw fit. Thirty minutes through it, he noticed a pink headed female walked out the store, waving goodbye to an apparent acquaintance of hers with a hideous black bowl cut and incredibly bushy brows, dressed in a head to toe green spandex. Yuck.
In the video, he noticed her outside man had black hair. Even though the camera was angled specifically to hide his face, he caught sight of some short black tresses on the nape of the man's neck. He scrunched up his nose while hoping Mr. Lunch Buddy isn't it. Mentally, Naruto memorized the other's features and jotted it down onto his internal notepad, planning on researching more about him later on.
He felt his lips edge up into a smirk as he stood up from his bench, magazine mindlessly thrown back to flop onto the wooden surface. He bent his head a little bit lower so his hair hid his face, a little chip-like device held between his pointer and middle fingers, and began running forward towards the two unsuspecting people.
A little gasp was elicited just before Naruto slammed into the pink headed female, falling unceremoniously onto her feet. Discreetly, he slipped the chip under her high heels and pressed it against the sole of her shoes, holding it long enough for it to stick firmly.
"Oh my god, are you alright?" The pinkette bent down to place both hands around his biceps, holding him steady as Naruto feinted dizziness.
"Er.. what? Ow.." He clutched onto his scraped knee as he slowly got up to his feet, the man next to him staring at him with huge, round eyes. Literally the size of saucers.
Please don't be it.
"That's the spirit, youthful one!" He gave Naruto a big smile and a thumbs up, apparently praising him for picking himself off the floor.
"Erm, thanks?" Naruto dusted off some dirt from his shirt, feeling a pair of concerned eyes on him. He regarded those emerald gaze and allowed a quirky grin to grace his features. "I'm fine now, sorry."
"Are you sure?" She voiced hesitantly.
"Sakura, you mustn't question a man's physical state. It'll squash his pride and his youthful spirit!" The green freak exclaimed with a throw of his arms.
"But Lee.."
"Hey now, it's fine. Don't have a lover's brawl because of me!" Naruto interjected, intent on hearing out their responses.
"Oh my god, you've got it wrong!" Sakura quickly protested, her eyes a little bit wider than usual as her hands were thrust forward.
"It is my dearest wish to be wedded to Sakura-chan during my youthful springtime, but she is unfortunately taken by one Sasuke Uchiha, therefore I must not interject." Lee stated with apparent grim in his voice.
Doesn't put him out of his suspect list though.
"Ah, my bad then!" Naruto bowed apologetically and casted them a wave, turning around as he pretended to leave. He heard Sakura mutter a quick goodbye to Lee as well until they both parted ways. Perfect.
When Sakura's footsteps sounded distant enough, Naruto turned back around to head towards Lee.
"Wait, Lee, was it?" He called after the green atrocity as he ran after it.
Lee turned around and the surprise to see him was evident in his insanely wide eyes.
"Can I please borrow your phone? I need to make an urgent call." Naruto said raggedly, panting slightly in faked tiredness.
"Ah, why of course! It is my duty to assist any youths to the extent of my capabilities!" Lee dug through a cleverly concealed pocket attached to his hip and pulled out a seemingly old mobile phone. "My sensei had it for his 25th birthday and he gifted it to me on my 22nd. It was an honour accepting it!" He pronounced proudly.
Naruto ignored it and made to dial a familiar number. He held the device to his ear and covered the back with his palm, sliding down the back cover enough to insert a similar chip onto his battery. When the dial was picked up, a cocky grinned appeared on his features.
"Hello?"
"Kiba-kun," Naruto greeted in a girlish voice.
"Naruto? Oh you bastard,-"
"I-I would like to o-order a meatball pi-i-zza, please." He stuttered on purpose, hoping to rile up the angry teen behind the line.
"Don't mock my girlfriend! I'll have you know Hinata has a mean right hook!"
"E-extra large please. The b-balls.. I like th-them big."
"Fucking asshole," He chuckled at the emitted groan. "Address?"
"I'll pick it up from your store. Be there in 10?"
Kiba hung up.
Naruto snickered and ended the call with a push of the red button, handing it back to Lee. The brunette stared back at him with a look of disdain on his face. "You mustn't make jokes so crude!"
Naruto turned around, intending to leave for real this time, and flicked his wrist as he raised his arm. "Whatever, freak."
He wasn't as oblivious to the shocked gasp as he pretended he was though.
x
"S'suke... " A breathy voice purred as the figure got on all fours, a seductive grin gracing his beautiful plump lips.
Sasuke stared back at him, restraining hard from salivating. Instead, he smirked as his eyes roamed the body on display with half his back propped up against the headboard, the only piece of clothing on him being a loose tie in burgundy, splayed across his bared chest, lying peacefully on the tip of his shoulder blade.
The tan body crawled towards him in an agonizing slow pace, a hand raised to twirl its lithe fingers around the edge of his tie. A head shot forward, eyes hidden by heavy blonde fringe, lips parted to allow a tongue free. The wet organ gave his cheek a sly lick, slowly travelling lower until it lapped at his own closed lips.
"Mmhm," a submissive sound tore through his throat, followed by a deep moan as fingers found placement on his unclothed manhood. His hands closed around the neck before him, pulling the caramel coloured beauty closer. Tongue left the safety of his mouth, playfully dancing around the offered tongue of the other man, following as his partner retreated back into the confines of the tan man's warm cavern. His head propelled forward to allow lips to latch against lips, his tongue darting forward in favour of probing the other's mouth open before joining into the twirl of an erotic battle inside the unfamiliarity of the man's mouth.
Fingers clenched tightly against his length, pumping him in time to the thrust of his hips, pushing further the limits his stomach could withhold against the dam of sensations screaming to be released. He turned a challenging smirk against the desperate shouts of his inner struggles. His own hand latched onto a sacred organ of his partner's, squeezing it experimentally before bringing it towards his own dripping length, hissing as flesh met flesh.
"Damn, you're really, really, hard, Sasuke."
Sasuke felt a gentle rub against his length, brows furrowing at the feeling of cloth on his heated member. His world began fading at a speed all too quick. With a shaking, translucent hand, he cupped his partner's chin, holding it up.
He had the pleasure of peering into a pair of mesmerizing blue recesses, staring back at him with a cheeky gleam. He blinked.
The only thing his hazy mind registered was as supposed to be, are the blonde locks hanging over tan face. Half lidded blue eyes were quirked into a teasing curve, clouded with anything but extreme need. Tantalizing lips were stretched apart to deliver a lopsided grin, no swollenness apparent. As he blinked once more and gazed downwards, he noticed the aggravating pieces of articles coating the body that brought him so close.
He growled.
"Don't need to get pissy, bastard! I brought pizza!" The mist of his dreams were blown away by a loud noise, to which he was sad to acknowledge, belonged to lips he desired.
The light nudging to his arousal brought his gaze upon the dent in his office slacks, eyes boring internal flames onto the large palm over it.
"Don't touch me so rudely." Sasuke found his voice, rough and ragged from the after effects of the highly arousing imagery his inner musings concocted. He didn't, though, slap away the hand on him as would be expected. It was oddly similar to the feelings spurred on by the man in his dreams, and he would swallow his pride and relish in it for a few more selfish seconds.
"I've touched you before and you never stopped me. I touch you again, and you didn't stop me. I'm starting to think you want this, Sa-su-ke." Naruto breathed next to his ear, the warm breath fanning out against his flushed cheeks, his blush concealed only half heartedly.
"Hn," He crossed his arms dejectedly over his chest before deciding his selfish moments were up. "I'm going to the bathroom." He announced, and got out of his seat, finally noticing the clustered pieces of paper crumpled slightly on his desk, the faint outline of where his head once laid traced by lines of papers affected.
He heard the blonde behind him sigh before speaking up. "Oh come on, it's not like I haven't seen it just last night." Arms wrapped around his torso from behind, pulling him back against a hard body. "Besides, I won't charge." Fingers curled around the hem of his pants before unbuttoning it, trailing over his bulge as they slowly lowered his zipper.
Sasuke's superior half told him to struggle, to push away those nimble fingers and pull his bloody pants back on, but the voice that accompanied it was abruptly changed into the one of the stripper from last night, teasingly telling him to do the opposite.
Confused, he decided to take on another topic. Something he could handle without having an internal debate.
"How was your stalking session?" He somehow managed to voice in baritone, mouth only twitching slightly at the stroking on his appendage.
"I've only got up to inserting a tracking chip onto Sakura's shoe and suspect no.1's phone." A finger slid across his weeping slit, circling the round body before lightly digging the forefront of his nail into it, earning a loud hiss from the shaking raven.
"I'll monitor their movements from my computer and check for anything unusual for the time being." A serious expression overtook the one of playfulness as a thought busted its way into the forefront of his head.
Naruto was vaguely aware of the throbbing in the swollen organ he was pumping, but the loud splattering brought on by the heavy stream of fluid shooting out of Sasuke's length had his attention directed to the present. He grinned at the quivering man, giving his softening member a light pat.
Two efficient knocks on the door had both their heads averted upward, the sound of the doorknob being twisted open had Naruto frantically forcing Sasuke's pants back up while the raven schooled his face as straight as possible.
His office door opened to reveal a young man, eyes curved knowingly as an insincere smile took over his lips in a valiant effort to deliver pleasure. Naruto's eyes narrowed at the short black hair, mentally adding said man onto his list of suspects.
He felt Sasuke shifting in front of him until his hands were forcefully pushed away from lean hips. The raven cleared his throat. "What do you want?" He asked, almost aggressively.
Naruto choked on his saliva. "Shouldn't you be more polite?" He whispered, shuffling to stand next to the stoic man while he kept his hands to himself.
"I am sure Sasuke-san is just embarrassed after having me interrupt what looked to be an intimate moment. I read in a book once that some people prefer to cover their embarrassment with anger." The black-haired man said as he kept up the fake facade of a smile.
He noticed the pale fingers clenched as they shook slightly in rage. In an attempt to lower the rising blood pressure, Naruto swung his hand lightly to the side, gently brushing over clenched fist.
Moot point.
"Answer my question," Sasuke all but yelled, glaring daggers at the smiling being. His voice was dark, laced with the venom of his infernal rage, and they quivered with obvious restrain.
"I'm most certain that you remember me from our last encounter. The scar I've obtained from the porcelain piece that struck me from the vase you shattered out of what I could only assume was unreasonable anger hasn't completely faded." He said with a smile.
"If you're here for the same reason, my answer is no." Sasuke wanted to smirk at the fact that he'd actually caused harm to the man, but the stupid smile he wore confused his emotions and put off the pride stammering forward.
"Perhaps I should leave you two to your discussion." Naruto nervously muttered as he made a move to exit
"Stay."
Well geez, woof. He huffed and crossed his arms, choosing to lean against an empty wall as they continued discussing professionally.
"I'll inform my superior. I've also read that it is manners to thank you after a formal discussion, which I take this to be, even with your once again, unreasonable attitude. So, thank you for spending your time of day to discuss this matter with me. I'll be taking my leave now."
Naruto was beginning to wonder if the smile on the man's face was a permanent fixture. He felt the tensed air around him dissipate as the brunette stepped out the door.
He turned to look back at the raven, fuming silently in his spot. He stood through the entire conversation and understood nothing. No wonder he wasn't suited to be a businessman. Shrugging, he put on a smile and regarded the raven with a box of pizza held in his palm. "Pizza, anyone?"
x
"Root Corporations, Danzo's PA speaking."
"Hello, this is Sai. I need to speak to the boss."
After some shifting noises, a gruff voice answered the line.
"Speak."
"It seems that the littlest Uchiha has found a new partner, and it is quite possible that he's more intrigued with him than his wife."
"Haruno will not be enough to trade for the Sharingan, is that what you're implying?"
"Yes, but I have devised a new plan and a backup just in case, sir."
"Very well."
