Chapter II: Learning Your Spirituality
After Tenzin and Katara had stepped out of the room, Korra sat on the bed, lost in her own thoughts. Katara had been working on her for over ten minutes with her healing abilities, but she had not been able to give Korra more than limited mobility. She could sit up, but that was about it.
Katara had explained it to her as best as she could. Bending was a fundamental aspect of a Bender. Taking that away from a Bender took away something vital inside them. It was like losing a leg. Korra had asked if she'd ever walk again. Katara hesitated before telling Korra that the former Firelord Ozai, the only known victim of Energybending in modern history, never took another step for the rest of his life after Avatar Aang took his Firebending away.
Korra felt it, for the first time in her life. She had always struggled with picking up on the Spiritual aspect of Bending, and now she felt like Amon tore a hole in her chest where her abilities used to be.
She had tried small amounts of Bending, the simplest moves that she'd known since she was a little girl: none of them had worked, not in the slightest. It was true: like Chi-blocking, except permanent.
The door opened and Mako and Bolin stepped into the room. Neither one of them spoke as they moved to Korra's bedside.
"I'm a failure as the Avatar, aren't I?" Korra spoke softly. "Avatar Aang was called the greatest Avatar who ever lived. When he died, everyone loved him. And look at me…" She snorted. "Avatar Aang brought peace to a world at war. I can't even bring peace to a single city. And, to top it all off, I've lost my Bending ability… maybe permanently."
"You're a lot of things, Korra, but you are not a failure." Mako said earnestly.
"And Avatar Aang wasn't perfect either." Bolin commented. "He went missing for a hundred years, didn't he? That's what caused the Hundred Year War to go for so long."
"But he never lost his Bending, did he?" Korra asked bitterly.
"My husband lost a great many things over the course of his life." Mako and Bolin jumped to attention as Katara stepped into the room. "A few months before he faced the Firelord, he lost the ability to go into the Avatar State."
Korra laughed bitterly. "And I've never even been in the Avatar State."
"Only because you are protected in a way that Aang wasn't." Katara said. "But Tenzin and I are going to help you. We are going to help you reach the Spirit World and contact Aang's spirit. He's the only one who can help you now." She glanced at the two boys. "Would you mind helping me?" She asked.
"Of course, Master Katara." Mako said instantly.
"She'll need to get outside for this. Tenzin's all ready waiting for us." Mako nodded in understanding and moved over towards Korra. He picked her up, and she wrapped her arms around his neck. Together, the three of them walked out of the room and out of the Temple.
"Where are we going?" Korra asked.
"To Aang's memorial." Katara answered, turning her gaze on the giant statue of her late husband a short way across the bay. "It is a highly spiritual place, one that is directly associated with him. If there is any place where you'll be able to contact him, it will be there."
Korra was pleased to see that the whole of the memorial had been cleared out prior to her arrival. The only people there now were the Air Acolytes who tended to the shrine.
Close up, Korra couldn't believe the size of Aang's statue. Katara noticed her gaze as she stared up at it. "It is the largest statue of him that was ever built." Katara said. "He never really liked the idea of having a huge statue of himself, but he also knew that the people wanted it."
Underneath Avatar Aang's regal gaze, and without her Bending, Korra felt so unworthy of carrying on his legacy. He had died in a peaceful world, and her only job was to not screw it up. Instead, she'd just made a worse mess than any Avatar ever.
Inside the memorial was just as regal as the towering statue outside. The walls were covered of paintings of Avatar Aang throughout his life. The walls were also lined with relics from his life, the most famous of which was his glider-staff. It was not his first one, that had been destroyed in the war. It was built for him by the Earth Kingdom refugees that were living in the Northern Air Temple at the time.
Katara moved over to one side of the room, smiling sadly at a painting that Korra realized must've been on their wedding day. The painting depicted both Avatar Aang and Master Katara in their late teens, dressed in the beautiful formal finery that was only worn for weddings, and sharing a loving embrace and kiss. There were pictures of each of his children, including Tenzin.
There were pictures of the war: images from stories that were told to children about the heroic Avatar Aang.
The picture at the focal point of the room was the most unusual. It showed a land of rocky pillars, with two indistinct figures on top of one of the pillars. They were glowing, one a deep orange and the other bright blue. The light from the two figures colored the sky around them, dividing the sky and the painting in half between the two figures.
"This painting is the only representation of my father Energybending Firelord Ozai." Tenzin commented. "My Uncle, Sokka, described it for the artists.
Korra stared at the painting. The figure of Avatar Aang looked so young. She had almost forgotten that he was only thirteen years old when he faced Firelord Ozai in that battle. Only thirteen years old and a Master of the Four Elements and the Avatar State. A feat surpassing all Avatars.
Bolin was off to the side, examining the remains of an old outfit that, according to the plaque, was the remains of the very outfit that Avatar Aang had worn in his battle against Firelord Ozai.
"He just wore a pair of pants into the battle?" Bolin asked, shocked.
"No." Katara said. "He wore a tunic too, but that was completely destroyed during the battle." She suddenly smiled. "Tenzin, do you remember the story about the town of Chin?"
"Yes, of course." Tenzin said, blinking in confusion. "That was the town that blamed Avatar Kyoshi for the murder of their leader and tried to punish father for it. He was set to be boiled in oil, but then he saved the town from the Rough Rhinos, so they let him go. Why?"
"When Aang was on trial, I made him wear Avatar Kyoshi's outfit in the hope that it would call Avatar Kyoshi to him. It worked, but I'd forgotten how silly he looked in that make up."
"Whoa, hey… I'm not going to strip down naked and wear nothing but a pair of old ragged pants in the hope that Avatar Aang might come." Korra interjected.
"Don't worry, that won't be necessary… we hope." Tenzin said. "Tomorrow is the start of the Summer Solstice. The solstice is the day when the Spiritual World and the physical world are at their closest. The first time my father was able to contact Avatar Roku was during the Winter Solstice."
"Okay… so what do I do until tomorrow?" Korra asked.
"You will spend the night mediating." Tenzin said. "If my father is right, his power in the Spirit World will be great enough to pull you over during the Solstice. But you'll need to meet him halfway."
"You mean that while you guys get to explore the memorial, I have to sit here doing nothing?" Korra demanded.
"Mediating, Korra." Tenzin said. "And I will mediate with you, for company."
"Right. Because I'm so much better at mediating when I have company."
"You can leave her here, Mako." Tenzin said. Mako did as he was told and set her down. "You are free to explore the island, but do not touch anything. Everything on this island belongs to the Air Nation and I will not tolerate thievery."
"We're not thieves." Mako said, a little bitterly. Mako was a smart guy, and he knew that Tenzin did not approve of him, his brother, or how they lived their lives.
"My apologizes." Tenzin said, sitting down on the floor in front of Korra. As usual, he was able to mediate quickly. Korra rolled her eyes towards her two friends, and attempted to join Tenzin. For once, she did not fidget or move around, but made an intense effort to stay still and silent.
She had lost the luxury of screwing around with the spiritual side of Bending. If Tenzin and Katara were right, if she didn't manage to make contact with Avatar Aang tomorrow, it would be six months before she could try again. The world couldn't afford to have an Avatar with no Bending abilities for six months.
"Let's leave them." Katara whispered to the two Bending brothers. "I'll show you around the island."
When Mako and Bolin were young children, and their parents were still alive, they had visited Avatar Aang's memorial once before. However, this was an entirely new experience. Back then their tour guide had been a young Air Acolyte who only knew Avatar Aang in his later years. This time, they were being shown around the site by the one person who probably knew him better than any person alive, and someone who traveled with him on his journey to end the war.
It wasn't that their other tour guide had been bad; it was just that the significance of some of the items escaped him. Master Katara knew all of the stories, and repeated them for Mako and Bolin's benefit.
She told the stories different from the way they heard them before. They always heard of Avatar Aang being a sort of demigod who never doubted himself and never did wrong. Master Katara spoke of his fears, hopes, failures, and doubts as easily as his triumphs.
As Katara showed them some of Avatar Aang and Firelord Zuko's letters as they spoke about the beginning of the United Republic of Nations and Republic City, Katara suddenly said: "Did you two know that Aang was against making the United Republic at first?"
This shocked both the brothers. "He was?" Bolin asked.
"Oh, yes." Master Katara said. "They disagreed so strongly about it at first that it led to quite a fight between them."
"You mean the famous friends yelled at each other?" Bolin asked.
"Yelled?" Katara laughed a little. "It was a full-blown Bending fight! Aang went into the Avatar State and nearly killed Zuko. He probably would have if I hadn't been there to stop it."
"The Avatar State…" Mako said thoughtfully. "What's it like?"
For a while, Katara didn't answer. "I can't tell you what it was like to go into the Avatar State, but I can tell you what it was like when I saw Aang do it. Before he learned how to control it, it was like he turned into a wild animal. It ran purely on instinct and lashed out at whatever was threatening Aang, those he loved, or the balance of the world. When he gained control of it, he was still awe-inspiring. The Avatar State gave him the strength of a thousand Benders. It's hard to even imagine the strength that the Avatar in the Avatar State possesses until you see it with your own eyes. Korra will certainly be even stronger with Aang's strength added to the pool."
"Why doesn't Tenzin teach her how to harness that power?" Bolin asked. "With that sort of power, you could easily wipe out all of the Equalists!"
"That would not solve the problem." Katara said. "You would only be validating their ideas that Benders are holding them down. Korra could certainly destroy Amon in an instant if she chose, but another would rise up in his place. Only the sort of restraint that Aang was so good at can possibly led to peace."
The night was passing slowly in the building's main chamber. Not a word was spoken between Tenzin and Korra until well past midnight. It was only then that Korra started to fidget and Tenzin took pity on her, calling an end to the mediation for now.
She had done much better than he could have ever imagined and she deserved a small break.
"I'm kinda curious, Tenzin…" Korra began softly. "Just how long could you stay in mediation?"
"The longest I've ever mediated was three days." Tenzin answered, and Korra's jaw dropped.
"Three days?" She gasped. "How is that possible?"
"It was very intense, and something that only a guru or an Air Nomad could have accomplished. But it was necessary." He tapped his forehead. "Getting all these tattoos would have been impossible if I hadn't been in a state of deep mediation through the process."
"Oh. I guess that makes sense." Korra said. "Tenzin?"
"Yes, Korra?"
"What was Avatar Aang like? I mean… what was he really like?"
Tenzin smiled fondly at the memories of his father. "My father was the gentlest person that you could imagine. He was not the sort of Avatar that you would expect to come out of a time of war: war-hardened and bitter. But the thing that defined him most was his ability to forgive. Even I have trouble comprehending his ability to forgive even those who were directly responsible for the destruction of the Air Nomads. His gentle personality was just what the world needed to heal from the Hundred Year war."
"Well, I guess the Avatar Spirit picked wrong this time, because I'm pretty much the exact opposite of what the world needs."
"You are what the world needs, Korra." Tenzin said. "You just don't know it yet. Now, we will return to mediation."
"Okay." Korra sighed, settling back down again.
