-TEXT LOG-
HEY NEPETA, CAN I GET SOME ADVICE?
:3 sure. what's up?
I NEED RELATIONSHIP ADVICE. AND ERIDAN'S NO HELP.
:3 of course that guy's no help. He nefur is. But why do you think I would be able to help with relationship stuff? I've nefur dated.
I giggle at the concept of my hopeless crush asking me for relationship advice. I wasn't exactly doing so well in my own dating life, and this concept was just solidifying my status in the friend zone. Several minutes of pouting at the ceiling and thinking are required before I can check my phone again.
I DON'T HAVE A CHOICE NEPETA! I'M DESPERATE. I MET THIS REALLY GREAT GUY. HE'S NICE AND REALLY CUTE AND I HAVE A MASSIVE CRUSH ON HIM, BUT HE SAYS HE DOESN'T LIKE GUYS.
IF I DON'T GET HELP WORKING THIS OUT THE FURY THIS SITUATION IS INDUCING IS GOING TO DISSOLVE ME AND REPLACE ME WITH A GIANT PILE OF SCREAMING ASSHOLES.
LIKE WHAT HAPPED TO FRECKLE FACE AFTER FEFERI TURNED HIM DOWN
SHIT. NOT THAT FRECKLES ARE A BAD THING NEPETA SORRY. I'M JUST PISSED. A TOTAL PISSLORD.
WAIT NO FUCK THAT'S NOT WHAT THAT MEANS. I'M SUCH AN ALL POWERFUL DICK-FOR-BRAINS IT'S PATHETIC
…
I SHOULD STOP RANTING NOW.
:3Sorry karkitty I got distracted.
:3 but geez...you're not any of those things Karkat. You're great.
I consider coming clean about it about it right then and there. Telling Karkat that I love him. Telling Karkat that I want to marry him. But then, I already know what the answer to that would be. I wonder if this is irony. I never really understood it, but the person I've crushed on for years asking for help getting over a hopeless crush, well that sounds pretty ironic.
I'M HARDLY WHAT I WOULD CALL GREAT...
:3 nope! you're great Karkitty! No question about it. You're great and funny and cool and a lot of things that are good. No, scratch that. things that are great!
:3 you're the catnip of people, that absolute tops!
:3 That's why I love you!
I stare at the screen in horror as I realize what I've typed. Impulsiveness is truly a curse. Time for a quick save.
:3 That's why EVERYBODY loves you.
NOT EVERYONE LOVES ME.
I DON'T
I HATE MYSELF
:3 well you shouldn't you self concious dork!
:3 the good kind of dork I mean!
:3 if what you said before is true, then just try to be friends.
:3 you still get to be around the person you like so much, and you get used to it after a while. It's pretty fun really. Putting friends fur-st.
I feel bad saying that, since I know exactly how the friendship with a crush thing goes. I want to go back yell in all caps to go after him, but I can't. Thank gog he responded before the impulse change my mind won over.
MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT...
I'LL GIVE IT A TRY
THE WHOLE FRIENDS THING.
I'M SEEING HIM TONIGHT.
:3 good luck Karkitty ^^
I sigh to myself and search up equius's number on my phone. That went terribly, and it's times like this when I need a friend.
