Rhett sat on the train heading for Charleston resolute that he would not turn back. All night he had sat in his study after Scarlett had finally went to her room. He could not forget the look in her eyes, the look of all consuming love. Why had it taken so long for that look to be fixed on him? How long had he waited holding his breath hoping? Too damn long, that was how long! He clenched his fists in his pockets; god sure has a funny way with timing. He was surprised that she had not attempted to follow him to his room, or seek him out in his study. When he got up that morning he half expected to find her in his bed or at the very least waiting for him downstairs. But no he had not seen hide nor hair of her and was able to leave the house without the least bit of protest. Had he hoped that she would try and stop him? "No." he shook his head and the porter informed him that they would be pushing off directly. He took a cigar out of his pocket and lit it taking a long hard draw filling his longs.
He was at his mother's house in Charleston when he saw the obituary for Mrs. Ashley Wilkes. Rhett's heart contracted at the proof that Miss Melly was really gone. No he had not doubted Scarlett told the truth it was more the soul clutching to hold onto someone. Too many deaths, too much sadness, the paper stated that the funeral would take place that next day.
Scarlett woke up that morning her heart heavy. This was the morning that they would lay her best friend to rest. Dear Melly, her sister in law, but more of a sister than her own two. Melly who had been her companion and confidant all these years! Scarlett finished her toilette and went to check on Wade. Pork was helping Wade get ready for the funeral. Scarlett had told Wade he was old enough to have his own room now and the boy had taken great pride in his mothers' characterization of him becoming closer to being a man. Scarlett also had told Wade that Pork would valet for him like he had for his grandfather. Scarlett knocked at Wades' door and was admitted by Pork. "Master Wade is all ready Miz Scarlett." Pork announced. "Thank you Pork." Scarlett smiled faintly. "Your Auntie would be so proud."
"Do you think so mother?" Wade asked with glistening eyes. Then after Pork made his leave to bring around the carriage Wade asked his mother a tougher question, one that had bothered him for a while.
"Mother, isn't Uncle Rhett coming to the funeral? "
Scarlett swallowed hard, "No," she said threat of tears stinging her eyes she just could not shed another tear she was all cried out. What should she tell Wade? How could she explain Rhett's hasty departure? "He had to leave for Charleston, his mother was not well." Scarlett lied.
Wade nodded and then offered his mother his arm and led her downstairs. Ella was staying home with Lou. Mother had said she was too young to understand. Lou had not known Aunt Melanie as long as Prissy had, and Prissy's own mother Dilcey being Beau's mammy, she would attend the burial with her family.
In the years that would follow Scarlett would discover that she could not recall much if any of the service of her sister-in-law and best confidant Melanie Hamilton Wilkes. All through the ordeal she felt a surreal numbness of being disconnected from her body she went through the motions of what was expected of her, Wade was more help than she believed possible and soon they were on their way back to the house.
Wade seeing his mother was not herself spoke to her in the first semblance of authority he had ever thought to tackle. He put a firm hand on his mothers arm to bring her out of her reverie and said, " Mother, why don't you go upstairs and lie down, I will send Lou up to help you. " Scarlett looked at Wade her eyes softer than he had ever seen them and she nodded a faint smile on her lips. At her look he took on a bit more strength and said, "I will tell Cookie that you will have a tray in your room tonight." As his mother nodded again and ascended the stairs slowly Wade went about his tasks.
When Scarlett awoke it was four o'clock in the morning, she sat up in bed her heart felt as though it was being squeezed, and she gasped for air feeling as though she were going to die. She felt so utterly alone. Her bedroom was like a vast tomb there was no life anywhere feeling for her slippers and grabbing her wrap she went out on to the veranda and began inhaling deeply. She felt trapped. "Stop it Scarlett!" she told herself. Just a few more hours and she and the children would be on their way to Tara. Just the thought of Tara brought a measure of solace to her, and Mammy was there. Mammy, suddenly she wanted Mammy dearly. If only she were here. Mammy had been so crestfallen after Bonnie's accident Scarlett had begged her to stay but Rhett had understood her need to leave and sent her on her way back to Tara. Scarlett was tired more tired than she had ever felt in her life, but when she finally lay back on her bed she found that she could not get to sleep. So she began getting her things ready for her trip to Tara.
It had seemed like forever for them to get to the train station, Scarlett was pleasantly surprised by Wade who kept Ella from annoying her mother with her thousands of questions. The last few days he seemed to be doing his best to make things easier for Scarlett. After Ella finally drifted off to sleep on the ride to Jonesboro, Scarlett told her son, "Wade, I would like to thank you for all your help these last few days." Scarlett placed a gloved hand on her sons and squeezed it affectionately."I couldn't have gotten by without you."
Wade's hazel eyes misted as he smiled at his Mother and he blushed slightly his chest puffing out with pride.
When the train pulled into what was left of the small station at Jonesboro and they finally were in the wagon with Will heading back to Tara it was late afternoon when they finally made it home. However for some reason where once the mere sight of Tara would have filled Scarlett with an easy calm now Scarlett still felt nothing. Scarlett was empty as if all of her feeling had emptied. This perplexed Scarlett.
Will had been quiet most of the ride. When first he met them he had expressed his condolences over Melly's death. He did not however ask her about Rhett a courtesy she was sure Suellen would not extend. Will could sense that Scarlett was not in the mood to talk, and her countenance troubled him some. He had known Scarlett for years now and never in all that time had he seen her look so forlorn not that she had ever had cause to look that way, but in all the time he knew her, Scarlett had always been so strong. Now Will feared that Scarlett looked broken.
When they pulled up in front of Tara everyone came out to greet them. Suellen was standing on the porch a sour look on her face as usual, beside her was Susie their oldest holding Will junior who was now about a year old and Ellen the middle child and then Mammy came out of the doorway a broad smile on her black face for her favorite child.
Scarlett's face brightened a little seeing Mammy and as Will helped her down Suellen started in, "Where is Capt. Butler?" At his wife's words Will shot her a look that quelled her. And Suellen changed her tactic, "So, sorry to hear of Miss Melly."
"Uncle Rhett's mother is ill, so he went to Charleston." Wade spoke and kissed his Aunt reluctantly on the cheek. Seeing Mammy Wade smiled brightly and gave the woman a genuine hug. "Mammy, we sure have missed you at home!"
"Mammy has missed you all too Master Wade." Mammy beamed, "You sore has growd!"
Scarlett followed suit, kissed Suellen and the children, then turned toward Mammy. Scarlett's eyes were misty when she walked toward Mammy. "Oh, Mammy, I sure have missed you darling!"
"Come Miss Scarlett, I will take you to your room so you can rest a bit for supper." Mammy said putting her arm around Scarlett. "Come Miss Ella, we will get you out of your traveling clothes so you can go play with your cuzins."
"I like that!" Suellen hissed at Will. "You would think we weren't even here, and this is our house!"
"Now Sue," Will gave her a stern look and whispered to his wife. "You know that this is Scarlett's house too, as well as Careen's and Scarlett has been through a lot. Remember what I told you, I will not have you two squabbling, Scarlett came here to get away from Atlanta for a bit, try and be sympathetic."
Mammy saw to the children, getting them into play clothing, and sent them out to play. Then she went to Scarlett's room. "Miss Scarlett," Mammy knocked on the door.
"Yes, Come in Mammy." Scarlett replied listlessly.
"My poor lamb," Mammy cooed as she came in the room. Scarlett was flung across the bed diagonally and Mammy could see her small shoulders shaking. "What's the matter honey child?"
"Oh, Mammy," Scarlett sobbed in to the pillows. "Everything, everything is wrong, I came to Tara because I thought it would help, but it isn't helping like it usually would. Usually just seeing, setting my feet on the place I would get a sense of ease. But this time there is nothing, just this same ache deep down inside me, I can't shake it." Scarlett raised her head to look at Mammy.
Mammy could see the haunted look in Scarlett's eyes; she had seen that look before, but never in Scarlett. Mammy was worried, "Miss Scarlett you just need some rest. Everything will look better tomorrow."
But Mammy had been wrong. The morrow brought no change, and after a few days of Suellen, Scarlett could take no more and she and the children went back to Atlanta. Despite Scarlett's insistence that Mammy need not come to Atlanta for her sake to Atlanta Mammy came with renewed energy. "Miss Scarlett, when Miss Bonnie died I needed time to grieve, but my home is with you. Miss Ellen she will be waiting for me on the other side, but while I am still on this earth I will be with you." Mammy declared as she was packing Scarlett's things for the trip back to Atlanta.
